John Leslie Sayre (March 28 1924 - April 11 2014)
In The Sun Also Rises, Hemingway writes:
Don’t you ever get the feeling that all your life is going by and you’re not taking advantage of it? Do you realize you’ve lived nearly half the time you have to live already?
If you posed that question to my granddad, he’d tell you he never once got that feeling. He lived his life to the fullest, taking every opportunity to explore new places, meet new friends or have an interesting conversation. A man so full of goodness, kindness, and love, he remains a lasting example to all the lives he touched long after their last encounter. Here are just a few of the things my grandfather taught me that have already shaped my life and will continue to guide me for many years to come.
Love
I’ve never seen two people more in love than John and Herwanna Sayre. From an early age, I always knew I wanted to find a relationship like theirs. They had so much in common and enjoyed all of life’s experiences together. Whether it was playing bridge, cooking, traveling or singing in the choir, it was incredibly easy to see that they were best friends. Even this year, 66 years after they were first married, they were still in as much love as I’d ever witnessed.
No love is all fun and games… I’m sure disagreement took place behind closed doors, but the only arguments I ever saw them have were about things, mostly jewelry, that Herwanna wanted to buy (or already did). Granddad always said her name was so fitting: “Her wanna this, her wanna that”). And every time she heard him say it, she would laugh, partially because she knew it was true and partially because she knew he was the ultimate saver. Which is why a few years ago, when my grandpa dropped some serious cash to buy his wife a forever ring as his grand gesture that their love was endless and would last forever, the entire family was floored and in awe.
Granddad, you’ve inspired all of us to be the best husband or wife possible, and to work hard to share all the experiences we can with the ones we love. I can’t wait to show the world that, after 66 years of marriage to my incredible wife Amy, you’re not the only couple that can be as happily married as you two were.
Family
My grandfather’s love didn’t just stop at Herwanna. He loved the rest of his family just as much and made sure that love was instilled in every generation to come. During my time with him a few weeks ago, one of his neighbors casually mentioned that she had a great family… Granddad didn’t hesitate for a moment before belting out “Well I have an amazing family too, and I love them very much.” He was so proud of every one of us, never pushed to be something we weren’t, loved us unconditionally (even when we all went through that phase of life we’re not proud of), and did whatever it took to encourage the whole family to get together as often as we could.
This love of family started as early as my mother can remember. Their family of six ate every meal together, traveled together on every vacation, and even after the kids left for college, everyone reunited at my grandparents house for the holidays. Every Christmas they’d pack the family up and traveled to both of their grandparents’ homes (my great grandparents) and spent time with the whole extended family.
While my own family may not have eaten every meal together or taken every trip together when I was a child, we all still recognized and understood the importance of family, thanks to Granddad. It’s unrealistic to expect my future family to do absolutely everything together, with the added chaos that life brings us each year, but you can bet that I will do everything I can to make them see and understand just how much I love them and care for each and every one of them.
Travel
It was in the late 1950s, while living in Stillwater, Oklahoma that my grandpa began to travel with his family. Each year they drove to a different part of the country, to visit national parks, world’s fairs and even to Canada when they were ambitious enough. It wasn’t until 1975 that my grandparents crossed the Atlantic on their first overseas trip. What would follow for the next 33 years was a world of adventures to dozens of countries across almost every continent.
Some of my earliest memories of my grandparents were of stories they told about the places they’d been and the people they’d met around the world. For them, traveling was never about checking countries off their list, it was about immersing themselves in new cultures and experiencing the people, the local music, the traditional foods and all the other unique things each country had to offer.
I don’t remember when I got my own travel itch but it came early and it’s been a core part of who I am ever since. There was something about hearing those stories, learning about those cultures and seeing the thousands of pictures from each of their experiences that made me want to get out and see the world, too. I feel lucky to have found a wife who shares this passion with me, and who wakes up every day and dreams of the next adventure we’ll take together. I haven’t yet had the chance to see as much of the world as my granddad has, but I’m catching up, and will continue to explore until there’s nothing left to see.
Saving
Anyone that knew my grandfather knew that he was far from a big spender. My mother tells me stories about growing up in a house filled with extra paper towels, aluminum foil and every other household supply you could imagine, all bought on sale, because Granddad never wanted to risk having to buy something at full price. This tendency didn’t stop at home. Anyone who traveled with him saw his suitcases filled with cans and boxes of food, because Granddad didn’t want to spend money going out for dinner every night.
You might be reading this wondering how two people could travel so much when one of them is has a near-allergic reaction to spending money, and the answer to that is that Granddad simply knew how to be frugal. In their early days, family trips were all by car and the family camped everywhere they visited. When my mother or her brothers and sisters were hungry, Granddad pulled to the side of the road and took out the Coleman grill to cook a meal instead of stopping at a restaurant.
But once Grandma and Granddad started exploring the world, they couldn’t bring their car and camping gear, so Granddad needed a new solution. He started Sayre Tours and organized group trips at home and abroad, where he and my grandmother would lead their friends and others around the world. As the tour guides, they always traveled free, stayed free, ate free, and, well, you get the point.
It’s easy to see that I’ve adopted Granddad’s same behavior. I, too, am a travel agent, and I use those credentials to get discounted travel all the time. The only difference is that my secret weapon has been mastering the game of credit card points and frequent flier miles. They’ve allowed my wife Amy and me to travel all over the world, just like my grandparents did, on the cheap. So thank you Granddad, without your inspiration, I’m not sure I would have been able to see things I’ve seen, meet the people I’ve met, or learn the things I’ve learned so far in life.
As I write this, I can’t help but think of hundreds of other things my granddad taught me. He was kind and passionate, adventurous and thoughtful, and always wanted the best for everyone. He will be a hard act to follow, but has served as a role model and an inspiration to everyone he met. I’ll never forget the person I’ve become thanks to his guidance and wisdom.
I love you Granddad.