Regained 60 of 120 pounds lost and found hope here

I had maintained a 100+ pound weight loss for almost 12 years when the pandemic hit. I lost the in person support that had kept me accountable. The stress felt unbearable and I ate a lot. Although meetings resumed I couldn’t “get my head together” to lose the weight. My counselor suggested body positivity podcasts. After listening for a few weeks I realized that I was using the excuse that I couldn’t get my head together to avoid taking responsibility and kept up the cycle of binge, repent, repeat. I had been doing binge restrict and the shame of weekly weigh ins worked pretty well to keep me thin. I just couldn’t keep those self imposed rules anymore. Heather helped me to see that God’s love is unconditional and that he is not judging me. I realized that I will never be happy with my body if I keep comparing my body now to my thinner body. I’m learning to think differently about food and to appreciate rather than hate my body. I have much to learn but I’m not eating like a rebellious child all of the time and I haven’t had to go up a size for months so I think these ideas are starting to sink in. I’m grateful for Heather’s help. Every time I hear her introduction I feel hopeful.