CC&P 11: New Year, New Season, New Us (sorta)

[Intro music playing]

SAREENA:
Helloo, my favourite fried potatoes! Welcome back to season 2 of Curried Chips and Poutine! We made it! It's 2021, and if you're with me, Sareena, in the UK, we are faceplanting straight into Lockdown #3!
[Airhorn noises.]
Woohoo, go team! Obviously that's not what we want from 2021, but we've got some unfinished business that we need to wash our hands from; so it's about time CC&P hit you up with a crispy new episode to help us imagine a brighter, more hopeful year. Also, want to shout out to Jatero, who's been loving on all of our insta posts - we see you, and love you! And a massive thank you to whoever was our first ever t-shirt sale!

MELISSA:
Yaaaay!

SAREENA:
Yeahhh! I think that buying something from our Redbubble shop should be the only new year's resolution everyone sets, what do you think, Melissa?

MELISSA:
[laughs] I mean, I don't think it should be the only one, but it should definitely be up there.

SAREENA:
[whispering] Buy it! Buy our stuff!

MELISSA:
We'll pimp it out later in the episode but yes, thank you so much for whoever bought that t-shirt, we love you.

SAREENA:
Yaaaay! But can you believe it's 2021?

MELISSA:
I really can't, it doesn't feel like anything's changed, really and truly. [laughs]

SAREENA:
No, it's just like another day. When the clock hit midnight it was like 'cool'. That's it.

MELISSA:
I mean... yeah, it was funny 'cause like normally we like, you know, watch the countdown on TV or something, and New York had a countdown but there was nobody in the streets, so they filled it all with those wacky waving inflatable people -

SAREENA:
Oh my god, that's awful! [laughing]

MELISSA:
It was kind of amazing, actually. [laughing too]

SAREENA:
You know how I don't like those things, they scare me.

MELISSA:
I know, but I mean, I think they're really funny, so...

[Laughter from both.]

SAREENA:
But that's nice, people around me did some fireworks, that was nice to see.

MELISSA:
Yeah, we had fireworks too!

SAREENA:
Yeah, it was nice! Had some kind of celebration, but still holding on to the day where we can have a safer celebration together, to say goodbye to all of the hardship that we've been going through.

MELISSA:
[laughing] Hardship indeed, huh... that's putting it gently but, y'know, this is a family-friendly podcast!

SAREENA:
Yes it is. [laughing] Nothing's changed in season 2, unless you've clicked that box and not told me about it...

MELISSA:
Well. [evil laugh] The More You Know! Anyways, moving on!
[Question chime]
I think I'll kick us off then, so it's a wishful new year... sort of...

SAREENA:
Yeah!

MELISSA:
Sareena, my friend...

SAREENA:
Yes?

MELISSA:
... Would you rather live through one of your literal dreams -

SAREENA:
Oh no.

MELISSA:
- like, you know, like when you go to bed and have like a weird sequence of events, but you come out of it like, ten million dollars richer -

SAREENA:
Ohhh!

MELISSA:
- OR, would you rather live out one of your figurative dreams but you're living paycheck to paycheck? [stage whisper] Kind of like what we're doing now! [cracking up]

SAREENA:
[also cracking up] Okay, well, um - I don't know if I've ever told you about like, my dreams, they're usually pretty intense, like -

MELISSA:
Oh.

SAREENA:
- I'm always either like being chased, I've had some where like, I've felt like ghost spirits in them, and I had one with like the Predator was in it -

MELISSA:
[laughter]

SAREENA:
- and I was just like 'aaah, I don't feel safe right now!' But to be fair, no physical harm has come to me in my dreams, I usually wake up before then so.

MELISSA:
That's good!

SAREENA:
Yeah, so if I was to go through with my dream, does it - if I wake up, that is the end of the dream? Or do I have to like, complete the sequence?

MELISSA:
Uhh, I'm gonna say you have to complete the sequence 'cause you can't like set an alarm and force yourself awake because that's cheating.

SAREENA:
No, but like, if you have one of the falling dreams, you wake up always just before you hit the ground -

MELISSA:
Ohh I see.

SAREENA:
- like I'm not gonna splat on the ground, am I?

MELISSA:
No no no no no, you won't. I guess it's when you - yeah, when you naturally wake up, when the dream sort of ends, I guess.

SAREENA:
Hmm. Aw man. Or I can live like, how I imagine my life to be, but I don't have that financial stability?

MELISSA:
Yeah, you're making your dreams come true, so you could be like, a big famous, you know, youtuber or streamer or something, there's just not a lot of money in it, d'you feel?

SAREENA:
[stage whisper] Then why do it? [laughing]

MELISSA:
It's for the self-fulfillment, why else?!

SAREENA:
Self-fulfillment ain't gonna pay the bills! [laughing] Oh gosh, I mean... so how much money am I gonna win?

MELISSA:
Ten million? Enough to live comfortably for the rest of your life.

SAREENA:
All right, you know, it's one dream, there's been many bad dreams, let's hope the one that I lock in is sustainable. I'll give that a go, because, you know, we're all still home, we're in lockdown, I would love to be able to move into a much nicer space, uhm, so to have the money to do that would be amazing - and at this point, what do you have to lose?

MELISSA:
I mean, you know somewhere out there the Predator is like, putting his party hat on and is like 'aw yeah I'm so ready' - [party music playing in the background]

SAREENA:
'Aw yeaaahhh, let's gooo'! [laughter segueing into 'I don't wanna do this' noises] What about you, what would you do?

MELISSA:
Honestly, I'm a little afraid 'cause my dreams are also really intense - I guess they're not so much intense as incredibly weird? Uhh, case in point, one time I had a dream, there was pokemon involved and also the whole thing- the entire dream was subtitled in Spanish -

SAREENA:
[cracking up]

MELISSA:
- which is fun because I don't speak Spanish!

SAREENA:
That's amazing!

MELISSA:
So I'm like 'I can dig it.... I guess??' Aha, so maybe I'll do that too, as long as I get to like - maybe not record this because I'm living it, but have some sort of record of the fact that I lived through this really weird set of - sequence of events, so...

SAREENA:
Yeah, for sure. Dreams are so funny like that, because I remember when we were in -  living in Korea, like a really good marker of how I felt my Korean skills were getting was I started to dream in Korean? Like not that I could understand what I was saying or speaking to the person but in my dream I'm like '[gasp] I'm so fluent!'

[Laughter from both sides]

MELISSA:
Fluency in a language, man... it's all I could dream about.

SAREENA:
Yeah. I'm still trying to master English, but you know.

MELISSA:
Yeeah, same here.

SAREENA:
Well that was fun, yeah! Let's start the year with traumatic dreams, we can do that. [laughs]

MELISSA:
I didn't say they had to be traumatic!

SAREENA:
No, but I'm sure the one that comes into play will be, but you know... ten million!

MELISSA:
It would probably be like, the worst possible dream, your psyche's like 'aw I'm ready for this' and toss up - it dredges up everything and you're like 'okay, I'm learning things about myself'.

SAREENA:
But yeah, good question!

MELISSA:
Thank you!

SAREENA:
But I think our questions may have a similar theme...
[question time chime]
So, obviously, at the start of every new year everyone makes a list of what they want out of it, and you know, who they're gonna become and stuff, but I kind of thought, what would be nice at the start of every year? So, would you rather, at the start of every year, have all of your bills paid for the year, or all of your takeaways?

MELISSA:
[GASP] Is there- okay, for the takeaway thing, 'cause that's immediately where my mind goes, is it like a set number? Or is it like every time I want to eat out, it'll be paid for?

SAREENA:
Yeah, basically -

MELISSA:
Oh my god.

SAREENA:
- just think about last year, how many times you ordered takeaways, that would be like, the same thing into this year, but those would all be paid - like they'd be free. Like, 'I want that fried chicken, boom-' [boop] '- I want that poutine, here, boom-' [boop] 'free!'

MELISSA:
[agonized noises] Ohhhh no, don't do this to me! [laughter] For the record, so for the lockdown I have been living at home, just been kicking it with my parents and my sister, 'cause it's easier that way - and my mother, in true Vietnamese fashion, has been cooking up a storm -

SAREENA:
[laughing]

MELISSA:
- we've been eating like kings regardless, and she literally refuses to let us get takeout, she's like 'You have all this food here! I cooked for you!'

SAREENA:
Yep!

MELISSA:
And then on the next day she'll be like 'aw you know I really want to eat pizza' and I'm like 'uh HUH, okay'. That being said, aw man, oh no, takeout.... hrrmmmm....

SAREENA:
I guess for you though, if you're technically not paying bills, takeaways would seem like, the way to go on this one.

MELISSA:
Yeah, 'cause well- it's not - it wouldn't just be me, I'd be like 'Hey fam, let's all - let's get takeout from like Swiss Chalet and eat like 80 dollars of food that I'm not paying for', you know?

SAREENA:
Yeah!

MELISSA:
Aw that's evil, no! Aw yeah, 'cause if I was living on my own I'd say I'd have my bills paid, but food is well and truly my biggest vice so I'll have to go with that.

SAREENA:
It's not a vice, food is beautiful, it's there to be enjoyed!

MELISSA:
No, that's true.

SAREENA:
But you're right, absolutely, if I wasn't paying bills I would 100% get my takeaways paid for because you know, takeaways make the world just that bit special. [laughs] But I don't mind paying for a takeaway, but I do mind paying my bills.

MELISSA:
Yeah, honestly, that's quite the society we live in - what is this 'making money to live' nonsense? Ugh.

SAREENA:
I know, right? So I'd definitely get my bills paid, then the money I'd be saving from that I'd be more than happy to put towards all the wonderful takeaways that I have nearby and support them.

MELISSA:
Yeah. Basically, it's like all the- oh no, there was a place right next to my house, they opened up a- it's a Tibetan momo place, Tibetan momos are like dumplings, right-

SAREENA:
Ah, okay.

MELISSA:
They opened up literally two days before the first lockdown went into effect.

SAREENA:
Oh nooo!

MELISSA:
I was like 'ohh noo!!' They're actually doing fine, because they do- it's dumplings, so it's almost nothing but takeaway, and they also offer bubble tea and like mango lassis and stuff, so it's been really - they're delicious, excellent work.

SAREENA:
Good! Support them! Buy all the momos!

[Laughter from both sides.]

MELISSA:
Oh I have, and they're delicious.

SAREENA:
That sounds amazing. I just got- what did I get? I got like a chicken wrap and chips last night and I was just like 'yeah, let's do this!' And then ice cream, because ice cream. [laughs]

MELISSA:
Oh my god. Yeah, we went grocery shopping and I don't know - have you ever had the White Rabbit candies?

SAREENA:
No, I don't think so?

MELISSA:
Ah okay, it's a very- it's a very Asian thing, but it's like a milky candy sort of thing, it has a white rabbit on the package, it's wrapped in rice paper - a lot of people don't know what to do with the rice paper, like 'do I eat this paper? Do I take it off?'

SAREENA:
Yeah.

MELISSA:
Spoilers: you eat it. Just toss the whole thing in your mouth, go. Um, but they had ice cream with that flavour, 'cause it's in popsicle form, so my sister and I were like 'ooh'. The texture's really like, wibbly and like, jelloid for an ice cream so we're like '...huh. Not sure how we feel about the texture, but the flavour's good!'.

SAREENA:
[laughing] It's like when you asked me if I wanted everything what, in like haggis texture or or shortbread texture so-

MELISSA:
Yeah! [laughs]

SAREENA:
- the taste is great, the texture - not quite sure.

MELISSA:
Not so much! [more laughter] Again, I love talking about food, I could talk about it all day! But we have to move on, we have questions to ask - and answer.

SAREENA:
Yes.

MELISSA:
[question time chime] All right. Sareena -

SAREENA:
That's me!

MELISSA:
[cracking up] That sure is your name! So would you rather! Roll a 20-sided dice to see how things turn out, with 1 being catastrophic failure and 20 being the most smooth sailing success? Or... would you rather flip a coin?

SAREENA:
Oh god! [nervous laughter]

MELISSA:
Nail it or fail it!

SAREENA:
Yeeah, yeah literally! Like I feel with a dice at least you've got more chances for it to be kind of in your favour, with flipping a coin it's either yes or no, it's just done - so clear cut! And um, obviously you know there's so many ways to flip a coin so I feel like the way I'd flip it like 'NO YOU'RE DOING IT WRONG' and here's catastrophic failure for everybody. [laughing]

MELISSA:
[cracking up] I'll say, for the coin - I'll say that the failures are not quite so catatsrophic, so like it won't be as bad, because it is a 50/50 chance.

SAREENA:
Okay.

MELISSA:
With a d20, you have a 1 in 20 chance of rolling terribly or really, really well. Everything else is kinda, you know, middling depending on where you land on the scale, right?

SAREENA:
Okay. And when you say 'catastrophic failure', like what is an example of that?

MELISSA:
So say you are cooking something you've never cooked before-

SAREENA:
Okay...

MELISSA:
- you roll that, if you rolled a 1, your house wouldn't burn down but you'd burn a hole in your pot.

SAREENA:
Oh god. [ALERT] Ohh no!!

MELISSA:
If you rolled a 20, it would turn out to be the most delicious thing you've ever made, the most beautiful thing, Instagram-worthy, and you remember the recipe so you can recreate it perfectly.

SAREENA:
So am I rolling or flipping for everything I'm doing, or-? 

MELISSA:
Um, I would say whenever you're about to do something... not like, basic functions, but for doing something that requires you know, input, like if you're at work.

SAREENA:
Oh god! [more laughter]

MELISSA:
'Sorry, guys! The dice just wasn't in my favour today!'

SAREENA:
Yeah, right? 'So sorry, I couldn't read.'

MELISSA:
[cracking up]

SAREENA:
Oh wow, if it's for every input? Um, then I'm gonna have to go with flip a coin, like as striking as obviously the two options are, if it's to a lesser degree of danger, I think I could live with that. But you know, I don't think I could live on a day-to-day basis trying to cook and then, you know, 'will I set everything on fire? Or won't I?' It's quite a gamble to be living your life by, so I'll go with the coin. [laughing] What about you?

MELISSA:
As much as I am a DnD fiend (and I am), that d20 is finicky! So finicky! Yeah I'll just, I'll flip a coin also. I'll bring out my inner Two-Face and just flip for everything.

SAREENA:
Yeah!

MELISSA:
Heads or tails! [coin flip noise] If the consequences were as dire for flipping a coin, could you imagine? It'd be like, 'yeah, a coin fell out of my pocket and all of a sudden I lost my house'?

SAREENA:
[aghast] Ohhh no!!

MELISSA:
That would suck!

SAREENA:
Oh my god, yeah! I- ohh no, that's why I don't carry cash! Only card!

MELISSA:
Yes, contactless payment! It's the way to go!

SAREENA:
It IS the way to go. Oh my god, that would just be horrendous.

MELISSA:
Yeah, honestly, I kind of regret now, I'm just like 'wow, this is actually - this question has lots of really, really terrible ramifications'!

SAREENA:
Oh look, there's Godzilla! I don't know if that'd be a good or bad thing because I love Godzilla, to me that'd be a great thing but I don't think anybody else would appreciate it.

MELISSA:
I would appreciate it! Maybe if he wasn't stomping on my house, though.

SAREENA:
But you've already lost that the day before, so what's it matter?

MELISSA:
Oh no!!

SAREENA:
Ahhh, okay. Well, I have a less catastrophic question for you.
[question time chime]
So obviously new year, everyone wants to get into the new mindset, everyone's thinking positive, so obviously we all are very familiar with motivational quotes, they come in many shapes and sizes and colours and cheesiness, and all of that good stuff. So would you rather have a motivational quote read to you every day by David Attenborough, or Morgan Freeman?
[Morgan Freeman impression] "Believe. I know it sounds like a cat poster, but it's true." If you know the film, let us know!

MELISSA:
[laughing] I was gonna say, I know exactly what you're doing! [laughter] That's funny, having a motivational quote read... oh, you mean like the Self Care Sign-off every episode? [Self-Care Sign-off chimes] Chii~iing~

SAREENA:
Chii~iing! I mean, absolutely, or just the cheesy ones, you know, "Live. Love. Laugh" and it's just Morgan Freeman or David Attenborough.

MELISSA:
Oh no. See, it's the content versus the narrator I suppose. Oh man, there was one that my aunt has in her house, and I laugh at it every time that I read it because it's like, 'These are the Family Rules! Give hugs every day! Don't be angry, talk it out!' and I'm just like oh my god you're such a mom. [laughter] She has two kids, it's great. Um, but oh man... [decision-making noises] Probably David Attenborough?

SAREENA:
Okay, yeah.

MELISSA:
I love the man, so-

SAREENA:
I mean there really isn't a wrong answer here.

MELISSA:
I was gonna say, you can't really go wrong with either of these, really, so. Concurrently my life is being narrated by Justin Bieber and David Attenborough so, you know. I'll take the bad with the good.

SAREENA:
That would be- I'm sure they would have amazing conversations, you know?

MELISSA:
About what?? What would they talk about?

SAREENA:
Your life!

MELISSA:
Oh my god, the LAST thing I want is for David Attenborough- sorry, sir David Attenborough, I believe, to comment on the state of my life. Please, don't.

SAREENA:
"And here we have Melissa, going about her day..."

MELISSA:
"She slept in till 10:30 again, for the fourth day in a row... Her alarm went off!"

SAREENA:
"But don't worry, her support moose is here to carry her through the day!"

MELISSA:
"It's feeling a bit peaky, we should check on how it's doing."

SAREENA:
Yeah, I think I'd have to go with Morgan Freeman, I do just really-

MELISSA:
Really?

SAREENA:
- enjoy his voice, and I feel like, you know, back then Justin Bieber- oh, what was the song, ugh, there was a song that he did, I think it's called, no, 'Love Yourself' maybe? And Morgan Freeman reads the lyrics for it and it's like really good, he does! He's just really good! I feel his voice fits more context, for like - as soon as I hear David Attenborough I immediately like, 'it's documentary time. It's time for learning, children, let's go'.

[Laughter from both sides.]

MELISSA:
Well, what is not your life but a learning experience, Sareena? Huh? Life's a documentary and you are the star.

SAREENA:
Ugh. I know, but I want Morgan Freeman to like, talk to me like Wyldstyle or something. [cracking up] Who's Wyldstyle?

MELISSA:
[also cracking up] Who? Lucy, who? [laughter] You know, if I could choose someone to actually narrate my life, do you know Keith David?

SAREENA:
No? I'm a face person, like if you show me a picture I would know.

MELISSA:
I don't know if you would, he does voice work for things, he did- did you watch The Princess and the Frog?

SAREENA:
Yes?

MELISSA:
He does the voice of Dr. Facilier.

SAREENA:
Oh okay!

MELISSA:
He also did the cat from Coraline?

SAREENA:
Oh, that, I watched that ages ago, I don't think I could remember the voice for that but, okay, I trust you.

MELISSA:
Oh my god, no, it's like ... super smooth, rich, velvety chocolate voice right in your ear, and I'm like "yeeees, narrate my life! Please!"

SAREENA:
Wouldn't you want Idris Elba?

MELISSA:
THAT is a man I want to look at for the rest of my life, that's different!!

SAREENA:
[laughter at Melissa's expense]

MELISSA:
Don't call me out on this! [laughing]

SAREENA:
Different men for different purposes, got it, got it, got it.

MELISSA:
Exactly! Aw no! Moving on, now that I've effectively shamed myself, well that's all right, 2021, this is how the year's gonna go, it's all right!

SAREENA:
It's about being open and honest, with new experiences and finding out who you are at the end of it! There's no shame, no shame.

MELISSA:
I'm glad you could come with me on this journey, together.

SAREENA:
There we go. That's what friends are for.

MELISSA:
[laughing] Exactly. Okay, okay.
[question time chime] Now to my final 'would you rather' question. Would you rather - have a lucky cat charm, and it brings you luck as long as you're carrying it, but it weighs like 300 pounds-

SAREENA:
Oh my god. [cracking up pretty bad]

MELISSA:
- or -

SAREENA:
Yeah?

MELISSA:
- or would you rather have a ghost in your house, but it brings you good fortune for as long as you're living there?

SAREENA:
Uuuuhm, so the ghost isn't- the ghost isn't bad or scary?

MELISSA:
Well... it's..... mischievous, I'll say. It's not bad, it's not gonna hurt you or anything, but it is a ghost and they do love to spook people, soooo...

SAREENA:
So I'll just come out the shower and it's like 'hey! I found this coin, do you wanna flip it?' and I'm like 'no, oh god!!'

MELISSA:
Basically, yeah. But then you go out to work the next day- er, or you go out the next day, and it's like 'oh look it's a sale for 80% your favourite food at the grocery store!'

SAREENA:
But I don't even think I can lift 300lbs! Like, I'm gonna have to do some serious bodybuilding for me to lift that cat.

MELISSA:
[laughing] I mean, to be- oh wait, you know what, let's say something a bit more doable, let's say... a hundred. But it can be whatever size you want, so it doesn't have to be like a gigantic backpack-sized lucky cat, it could be a charm in your pocket that still just weighs 100lbs, so you know.

SAREENA:
I feel like that would rip any pocket I have! Right? There's just no pocket strong enough to sustain that! I don't- I work in kilograms, oh, what is that, man, what is that...

MELISSA:
... Like fifty kilograms?

SAREENA:
I do not think that is the right conversion, but-

MELISSA:
Look- okay fine, so what is it? Pounds to kilograms, is that what we're doing?

SAREENA:
...Yeah? No wait, I know this, it's 14 pounds to one - no, that's stone-

MELISSA:
No, that's stone, right-

[Dial-up noises as we struggle]

SAREENA:
That's stone, but in one stone, it's....

MELISSA:
That's 14 pounds, isn't it?

SAREENA:
... Six... that's just over 6 kilos, oh god, there's too many numbers going on-

MELISSA:
Okay no hang on, 100 pounds is 45.3 kilograms! Oh jeezy...

SAREENA:
Okay! That's a lot, but I can lift that.

MELISSA:
That's like the weight of like, a child. Teenager, teenager- maaaybe? Whatever-

SAREENA:
A child? Clearly you've never picked up a small child before- [laughs]

MELISSA:
It's been a while since I've picked up a small child, okay, my cousins all grew like weeds-

SAREENA:
Oh right- [laughing] I thought you said your cousins grew weed! I was like 'WAIT MELISSA NO NO NO"

MELISSA:
WHAT?

[BEEP. Thank you for your patience as we restore order]

SAREENA:
- 43 kilograms, it's like a- it's like an oversized suitcase. Like, when I moved to Korea I took 30 kg with me and I could lift that-

MELISSA:
[incredulous squawk] Was that- all that fit in three suitcases?

SAREENA:
No, 30! 30 kg, I fit that in one suitcase, thank you very much!

MELISSA:
ONE suitcase?!

SAREENA:
Yeah!

MELISSA:
That's crazy! Okay okay, oh my god.

SAREENA:
Ohhh gosh, so... magic cat, very heavy, or a spooky ghost that won't bring me danger, but-

MELISSA:
It brings you good things, for as long as you live there!

SAREENA:
['I don't like ghosts'-noises] I don't think my heart could take it, but - wait, so if the cat's just chilling in my room, and I'm in the room, will the effect still be there?

MELISSA:
Yeah. But if you wanted to go anywhere else and you wanted to like, bring that luck with you, then you'd have to bring it with you.

SAREENA:
I could get a skateboard! I could put it on the skateboard.

MELISSA:
As long as it's on your person somehow.

SAREENA:
I could be on the skateboard with it on top of me!

[Laughter from both sides.]

MELISSA:
Maybe in this case it'd be a little less weird to have it life-sized so it doesn't look like you're a weirdo for like, "ah yeah I'm on this skateboard with like this tiny 3-inch tall lucky cat in front of me, yyYOOP!"

SAREENA:
No, it'd be like, it'll be that thing, you know, I bet you can't lift it and then all these, you know, big buff guys would all be like 'arrghrghggh I can lift it' and then they're like 'OH GOD the tiny cat is so strong!'

MELISSA:
But then THEY'D be really lucky! For like the seconds that they're holding it. 'But that's my lucky cat!'

SAREENA:
That IS my lucky cat, but don't worry, I'd fight them. Erm, I'll take the cat, I like this challenge, because it would always give you the incentive to like, make sure you're working out, making yourself stronger, so at least you can lift this thing! To make it like, 'give me the good juice!'

[Both cracking up.]

SAREENA:
I think that's fine, 'cause even if it's just chilling in my room then at least the ambience of the room will be good. But with a ghost it's still quite unpredictable that yeah, okay, it might not harm me, but if I'm just coming out the shower I don't want to be scared like that, okay? I just can't live my life like that!

MELISSA:
It'd be so funny, like, you come out of the shower and like you expect to see the ghost but no, the ghost just drew like a smiley face on the steam on the mirror, like [goofy ghost voice] "hey, how you doing :^)".

SAREENA:
Just, no, that's horrible- that IS horror for me, I can't! Give me the big cat!

MELISSA:
It's a friendly g- no, I can't say that it's friendly, no, it's just mischievous-

SAREENA:
Denied! What would you do?

MELISSA:
I dunno, I think I might go with the ghost, though, I think that'd be really funny.

SAREENA:
Hmm, yeah, mmhmm.

MELISSA:
Look, I have lucky cat charms but if I lived with a ghost I think it'd affect everybody else who lived here, right? So I could call my buddies and be like 'hey's let's be roomies!'And this money ghost would be like 'gotcha covered'.

SAREENA:
[unconvinced] Well, you let me know how that goes, I will add another cat to my many, many cat ornament collection, and we'll both live happy lives.

MELISSA:
Yes. Oh Sareena, you wacky cat person, you.

SAREENA:
That's me. But that'd be good, 'cause like okay, you've got the ghost, I've got the cat, between us we should have some luck, you know?

MELISSA:
Oh, yeah, it'd just be- loading up on all the lucky things, let's just get a lucky cat, I also had a potential question for like, a four-leaf clover that would only be lucky so long as it was fresh and green-

SAREENA:
Okay.

MELISSA:
-lucky horseshoes -

SAREENA:
I do have horseshoes from when I had my pony, so.

MELISSA:
Oh yeah, you do like horses, they terrify me, so I-

SAREENA:
Ponies!

MELISSA:
No!

SAREENA:
Pretty ponies!

MELISSA:
Pretty pony...

SAREENA:
So pretty. Okay. [laughing] I could talk about ponies all day too.

MELISSA:
Yep.

SAREENA:
[Question time chime] My last question; again, I had a google to see what are like, the most common new year's resolutions that people tend to make, and you know, it can be from being better with money, it can be like, not drinking as much, being more active, you know, hitting the gym, or taking up a new hobby... so, would you rather achieve a body or a hobby goal? And by 'body' it can be like, mental health, as kind of like, as 'manage my anxiety better' or-

MELISSA:
Oh, I see.

SAREENA:
- 'I want to sleep better, you know I just want to be able to sleep!'. It doesn't have to be the standard 'SIX PACK ABS' (which would also be nice) but, you know.

MELISSA:
Yeah, in my case? Not happenin'. I like sleeping and eating way too much. But, it's funny that you asked this question because I've actually been doing both of those things, for the last like, year or two? Because hobby-wise I've picked up cross-stitching and I've been stitching like nobody's business.

SAREENA:
That's right, yeah!

MELISSA:
Yeah, I've been cross-stitching, I've been- I mean, I do have other hobbies, like I draw - I draw, I play video games, I cross-stitch and like for a while I was doing some watercolour- I was trying out watercolour painting, which is pretty fun-

SAREENA:
Ooh, yeah!

MELISSA:
-you know, creative outlets, things like that. But I've always been that kind of person though, to create somehow, or, y'know, writing or something, right? Whereas the body goal type of thing, like.... I am not the most fit person, I'll say that much, I'm not fit at all. For a while I was trying to dance, like, do a dance video like every day, but then I gave up real fast because I am, again, not fit. My stamina is teeerrible. But as far as being like, happy goes, I've been working on mental health because, y'know, I feel like everyone's struggled with mental illness at some point in their lives, you know, and it's a long journey. So I've been working on that too, very very baby steps but that's been working out too. Maybe I'll do the body one, just because it is something that I'm constantly working on, versus a hobby where I'll pick up cross-stitching, I picked up cross-stitching and then go through periods where I don't want to do it, but then I'll pick it up again and do nothing but for like a day, so, y'know.

SAREENA:
Yeah.

MELISSA:
I started a cross-stitch for a friend and I still haven't finished it - I'm sorry, Jordan, I'll get it to you eventually-

SAREENA:
[laughing] She said it live here, Jordan! She has to do it now!

MELISSA:
[laughing] I know, I'm sorry!! I'm so close to being finished!

SAREENA:
Yeah no I feel you in terms of like, the hobby kind of side, like obviously I feel like when it was lockdown - well, the first two, you know, I got back into writing, obviously I gamed a lot, and then obviously we started doing the podcast, which to me, is now a hobby if you want to make it a career, you know, Redbubble (buy our t-shirts). [laughing] I feel like, in a way, I've kind of been doing but also last year because I've been furloughed I actually was able to look at myself, like 'cool, let's take some steps, let's help to reduce some anxiety, let's help to sleep better, let's be a bit more active' and I was able to actually lose like over a stone? Which I'm like completely proud of-

MELISSA:
Wow! Yeah!

SAREENA:
- I've got more to go, like six-pack abs have always been a dream of mine, it's just like, it would just be such a goal like 'yessss, I'm here'! But how I always approach weight loss and stuff is like actually I just want to sleep better because that's the main goal, so I think I want to keep with that, and just focus on being well-rested, and I think that would just help, you know, overall happiness, you know, anxiety, you know, would give you the energy to be active in whatever way you wanna do, so.... yeah. Just let me sleep!

MELISSA:
In the culture of being like "Yeah I only got like 3 hours of sleep last night 'cause I stayed up until like 5 am binging things" I'm like, that's not really healthy, guys... and like during my university days, pulling all-nighters was like the worst thing in the world!

SAREENA:
Yeah.

MELISSA:
It felt awful, it actually makes you more subsceptible to getting sick because your body is literally exhausted, some people will pick up, you know, energy drink dependencies (cough Red Bull cough)... Red Bull's disgusting, by the way, I can't drink it. But I think sleeping better, you know, for some people it's hard for them sleep anyway, like my family members of mine  have like sleep apnea so it's physically hard for them to sleep.

SAREENA:
Ah, yeah, I toss and turn like nobody's business and I'm just like bleh! Nyeh! So if I, you know, had the perfect mattress, have the perfect duvet, and just, y'know, have a nice kind of, relaxed mindset and then actually get some sleep, you know... watch out, world! [laughter] I'll be ready but until then, you guys can chill, that's fine.

MELISSA:
I always joke, that's how we've been nerfed, like I have too much power! I could take over the world if only I could sleep 6 hours a night, huh?

SAREENA:
Yeah, exactly!

MELISSA:
This is not a sponsorship, but have you considered like one of those sleep-noise machines? Like those, where it plays ambient noise and things before you go to bed?

SAREENA:
I mean, I just would listen to like, if I really needed help I would listen to like, 'calming music!', or 'sleep waves' on youtube or whatever, if you just put that on.

MELISSA:
I mean, that's what those machines do.

SAREENA:
Yeah, so I would try that but then I have my earphones in my ears and they're not comfy whenever I'm trying to sleep, so, it's okay. I have a weighted blanket and that has been really nice, I feel very snuggly; and it's not like heavy enough to stop you from moving, but it encourages you not to move and I think that's been helping, so yeah. Try a weighted blanket if you, too, struggle with sleeping!

MELISSA:
Aw man, it's so funny though, because speaking of just how weak and noodley I am, it's like, y'know, you'll see weighted blankets at like stores, yeah this one's 50 pounds and this one's 20, I'll pick one up and my arms are just like trembling, I'm like 'rrraaggh'!

SAREENA:
Yeah, they actually have a decent weight to them so whenever I gather the blanket off my bed to like move it elsewhere, I'm like 'hurgh! Okay, right!'

MELISSA:
It's triple-fold, Sareena! You're getting swole, AND rested, AND it's good luck!

SAREENA:
Yeah! Win, win, win!

[Laughter.]

SAREENA:
Gosh, can you believe it? This is season two, Melissa!

MELISSA:
We've made it, this is our 11th episode to whoever's counting!
[Cheering children sound effect.]
Whoooo!

SAREENA:
Wheee! It's always us counting.

MELISSA:
Yes, that's not the point! But-

SAREENA:
But it's good, like, you know, obviously we just set out last year just to, you know, make sure to keep in contact a bit more, and just see where it goes, and currently I think we're almost at 290 downloads, which is kind of crazy! Like I know we plug this to our friends all the time, but I'm sure there's some strangers out there? Jatero, are you listening?

[Both hosts are cracking up.]

MELISSA:
We had a spike, it was like 20-some-odd downloads in one day, which I think is the highest record for us? Not to talk stats on air, but I thought it was very cool.

SAREENA:
It was amazing! I thought like, I check the news every morning, I check our stats every morning and then, you know, I check my messages, that's kind of how I do it, but I was just 'whaaat? This huge spike, not in cases, but in downloads'. And it was just really cool to see, so yeah! Thanks so much, everyone, you make us feel warm and fuzzy!

MELISSA:
It sure does, and - speaking of warm and fuzzy, hey - would you like to grab a hoodie with our logo on it?

SAREENA:
Why yes, Melissa, where can I get one?

MELISSA:
Well, funny you should ask, becaaaaause - we have a Redbubble store!

[Cheering all round!]

MELISSA:
And, you know, if anyone's ever bought stuff of redbubble before, they offer, you know, all sorts of products, and we have our logos. So any of the artwork you've seen in the thumbnails that I've drawn, y'know, the Halloween logo, the regular logo, plus I also have a transparent one, you can buy them on Redbubble on certain products! You can get them on t-shirts, which is super cool, I've gotten one already (I'll post a picture later), and they have it on notebooks, mugs-

SAREENA:
And they have a wall clock, people! A wall clock! I know it's the hottest item out there, if anyone buys the wall clock you will have your own episode, we will talk about you, it's insane, it's a bit pricey but y'know - we'll do it, just for you, if you buy that wall clock!

MELISSA:
Yeah honestly, that's an option! They have all sorts of stuff - they have like... shower curtains, you know? And jigsaw puzzles and things, I'm like "All right! That's pretty rad!"

SAREENA:
Yeah!

MELISSA:
We'll pop the link - ah, you know, we have the link up on our website, I'll probably drop it in the comment of this one, but it's a great way to support us, even if you can't, y'know, buy anything it's pretty cool if you just spread the word. We appreciate you telling your friends "hey! Guess where I got my sick t-shirt! Yeah that's right, from the Curried Chips and Poutine Redbubble store!"

SAREENA:
Yeah! Show your appreciation as our favourite fried potatoes!

MELISSA:
You ARE our favourite fried potatoes! Speaking of - actually, it ties in perfectly with Sareena's last question, but it is now time for the Self-Care Sign-Off, for the first episode of the year.
[soothing chimes in the background]
Hey! Do you remember what you were like 10 years ago? How about 5 years ago? Or even last year? Are you cringing? Welp, cringing is actually a good thing in this case, because if you're looking back at yourself and if you see how different you were from where you are now, that's a good thing! It means you've grown! You've come a really long way since then, and all I want you to do is to continue growing. Keep on keeping on, keep on evolving to be the best version of yourself that you can be, and also so you can tell someone unironically that this isn't even your final form yet.

Hey, if you want to share some stories about, you know, what you were like back in high school, you can feel free to drop us a message, you can reach us at curriedchipsandpouting@gmail.com; or you can reach out to us on insta, where we can just comment almost right away. And even if you don't have stories about, y'know, high school you, or maybe even if you wanna share some tips about, you know, how you got through last year, or how you've grown as a person, feel free to reach out to us. We'd love to hear from you, and we keep doing this podcast because we love it - and we love you guys. We appreciate every download, every like, and like really and truly means the world to us, and 2021 - out of the gate with a bang! And so we just wanna say, we appreciate you. We love you, thanks for listening.

BOTH:
Byeeeeee!

[Outro music.]