Embracing a Grace-Focused Approach to Aging and Body Acceptance After 40 (Core Essentials 1)

Hey there, welcome to the Grace Health podcast, your source for aging strong in your physical, mental and spiritual health. My name is Amy Connell. I'm a weight neutral certified personal trainer and nutrition coach who loves walks with friends, chocolate and Jesus. Whether you're looking to grow stronger as you age, nourish your body, mind and spirit, or fit all the pieces of your health together to holistically thrive, this is the place for women over 40. I'm here to guide you in the areas I can and bring on experts in the areas I'm still learning, and, of course, we cover it all in a whole lot of grace. I'm glad you're here and, for those of you who have been listening in a while, you just stopped in your tracks and you were like wait, this is all very different. I don't know how you feel about different. Most of the people in my house do not like different, but I'm okay with it. Naturally we don't and yes, we are coming in a bit different today. I am starting this season, this very short season, with a bit of a refresh and some clarification and some expectation setting for moving forward. You've already heard the new music and intro and I am spending just the next four episodes providing clarity on what you will receive here, what you get when you listen to the Grace Health podcast. This is episode is the first of a four part series that I am calling the core essentials of the Grace Health podcast, and what I'm going to do is these are going to come out, these four episodes, over the next two weeks. So this is airing on a Tuesday. You'll find another one in your feed on Thursday, same thing next Tuesday, next Thursday, and then we get into if you want to call it regular programming for all of you Gen Xers like me, or just kind of regular season type stuff. Why am I calling it core essentials? Well, as you know, I'm a personal trainer and I love talking about the core, and, in fact, you all love learning about the core as well. Anytime I get a new client or I talk with someone about what their goals are, inevitably the interest is in strengthening their core, which is understandable. Our core is at the center of our body. All movement stems from it. So it has a ton of functions and we have had several conversations about it, but it stabilizes us, it provides posture support, it provides balance and coordination and even functional things like protecting our internal organs. So, whether you are a new listener or if you have been tuning in for a while, I invite you to listen to this short season to understand the core of what I am doing here on the Grace Health podcast. As this is coming out, it is at the very beginning of January 2024. I have spent a lot of time thinking and having conversations with my husband about just the goals of everything I do, not only in the podcast, which is a huge part of what I do, but in the books that I'm writing and my speaking and other programming that I am wanting to do. I've really been able to clarify what that is. I've kind of been just doing this willy nilly for a long time and, of course, whenever I'm asking him for advice or guidance on something, he says Well, what are your goals? And I'm like I don't know. So we've had some wonderful conversations. He's so good at that type of thing and I just thought it was good to come on and just kind of put a stake in the stand. If you've been with me a while, none of this is going to be new to you, so I am not here to shock you, but I do think it's important to say this is where Grace Health podcast is, and this is what you can expect. Now, these core essentials are different from the statement of values I did way back in season 12, episode 25. I thought was the 176th episode I've done and this is about the 340th episode I have done. So it's been a while since I put that out, but nothing has changed because I also spent a lot of time thinking about those statement of values. You can go back and listen to it again. It's season 12, episode 25, but just for a super high level, the statement of values is knowledge, discernment, diversity, encouragement, faith and grace, and clearly, clearly, grace is going to be threaded through everything I talk about, because that's the name of this podcast and of everything I do. So what are the four core essentials? Okay, so I'm not great with, like, coming up with creative ways of saying things. As you may know, I tend to say the same things. So I was trying to be creative about this and, of course, of course, I came up with the acronym of Grace to talk about this. So the four core essentials cover, or are in the acronym of Grace, and I know that Grace has five letters, so I've combined two of them. G is Grace focused. So I know we've got like a lot of grace word here and we're going to talk more about that today. Grace is our conversation today. R and A is resilient aging. I can't wait to talk about that in the next episode. C stands for Christ centered, and I do want to clarify some things in that episode for you. E is expansive health topics. So those are the four core essentials. Everything you hear here on the show and really what I do in everything else, with the exception of my work with young women, is focused on those four core essentials Grace focused, resilient aging, christ centered and expansive health topics. So let's talk today just about the first one G Grace focused. I believe there are a million different ways that we can give ourselves grace, especially as women over 40 mean what's not changing, what is not feeling like it's going downhill a lot of things and we've got to give ourselves grace from some of that. So I want to talk some about some specific areas where the episodes on the Grace Health podcast will have an element of grace to it. One of those is grace from body size expectations. A few months ago, I changed my Instagram bio to say I am a weight neutral personal trainer and I've kind of been that way for a while, but I'm just I'm just putting that in there right now I am weight neutral. I try very hard not to have conversations on here that focus on weight or size. Obviously, with a wide variety of guests, people will intertwine that into two things that they are saying or their stories, and that's fine. I don't expect everyone to be that way. It took me a long time to get to this point. One thing I love in some of the areas that I've been learning in is the American Medical Association has finally acknowledged that BMI isn't a useful health tool. So I have said for a long time, really since I started doing this, that BMI is not in the Bible. Bmi is body mass index. You are probably aware of that. It's a ratio of your height to weight. It doesn't take into consideration other factors like muscle mass and hydration. The thing I always like to say is, if you don't believe me, google professional athletes with a high BMI. So our health is indicative of so many factors, and that can include things like your environment, like are you living in a safe place? What's your? What's your socioeconomic status? What is it like in the community that you're living in. Family history is another factor of your health, and some things you were just born with Our genetics drives our health, so do things like metabolism and as well as other habits and behaviors that we just inherently have or that we learn from the people in the community around us. And then our health is shown in many areas like your blood work, your functionality, how are you sleeping, how's your mental health? It's not indicated by your size, so I'm not interested in having conversations that revolve around weight or size. I understand not everybody is there, and that's okay, but if you are looking to this podcast to learn tips and tricks on how to lose weight or change your body composition, you're probably not going to find it. You will find conversations to help you feel and function well. I use that word a lot and in fact I even did a full episode on what does feel and function well mean. That is in season 18, episode five. So if you're like Amy, I don't totally get the feel and function well, you can go back and listen to that. So these conversations absolutely do help us feel and function well, and I'll talk more about this in the next episode, which is on resilient aging. What is going to help us thrive and do the things that God is calling us to do, not so we can reach a quote goal weight, or something like that. Another area in terms of grace is grace from utmost precision. The word that comes to mind as I put my thoughts together about this is biohacking. So there's a lot of discussion about biohacking right now, and if you're not really familiar with that or maybe you've heard it but don't really know what it means it basically refers to the practice of making changes to your lifestyle, your diet, your environment in order to optimize and enhance biological functions and performance. So there's a lot of various tools that can be used for that techniques, technologies to improve this mental and physical well being, and then it can also help you achieve specific health or performance goals. So this is the deal. I am all for learning information. I love the science that is out there. I think it is fascinating how far we have come, particularly in terms of the science that is out there, particularly in brain science and neurological science as it relates to the body in the last 20 years, and these are all things that I've been learning as I've been walking through this podcast, so I did not come in with this information. I think this is fascinating. The human body, oh my goodness, I don't even have the words for it. Besides fascinating, god created such a complicated and well oiled system. I don't know if that's the right word, it's just. It's incredible. It's incredible and I love learning about all of this. I love listening to podcasts like Huberman Lab, where he takes all kind of research and all kinds of science and puts it out there. I regularly turn it, tune into movement related or exercise shows. I read a lot of nonfiction health related books. With that said, that information can, and that content can not only get overwhelming but just daunting. Like if there is so much out there, it is daunting and I believe that's why I get the primary response that I receive in a survey from people who join my list. So when someone joins my list, I invite them to fill out a survey. It takes like three minutes so I can kind of get to know them better, get to know their ages, get to know you know what if they work and all of that kind of stuff. One of the questions that has several statements says like here are several statements, what do you best identify with? And the most check statement is I'm just doing the best I can, but when I look around it seems like it's never enough by far. This is the one that people check. I completely understand these survey respondents resonate with that and feeling overwhelmed with moving and eating and body image concerns, and I do kind of think that this trend of biohacking contributes to that. Again, it's daunting. The utmost precision of all of this biohacking feels like it's just too much. And then the thing I would like to offer in addition to that is we have got to remember the law of diminishing returns. So let's just think about advertising for a minute. When you decide, okay, I'm going to advertise something, and you know, do some advertising and marketing and we have a budget for that, Initially either earning or increasing that advertising and marketing budget, that may rise or that may lead to a substantial rise in your product awareness and sales. However, at some point, you can keep throwing all the money in advertising and it's like okay, I get it Like. One of the things I think about is third love. A couple of years ago, all I heard was third love advertisements on podcasts, and I don't know if it's just because I listened to like female podcasts or something, but I heard third love all the time. So at the beginning it was really effective, and now if I listen to an advertisement from them, I'm not really listening to it, because, number one, I already buy my bras from there. But number two, like it's just I've heard, it's saturated. And so there's that law of diminishing returns. I think we can have a law of diminishing returns on what we are doing with our body. Yeah, let's make some changes. If you're due for some changes, make them, and I'm all for that. However, do we need to get so specific and so detailed that we are 100%, fully optimized? I don't think we do so. With all of that said, instead of the utmost precision, I try to offer a zoomed out lens on how to apply information. That's why you hear one simple thing at the end of almost every episode, and rarely will you hear me prescribing something specific and like this is what you need to do Now. Again, with that said and this is under the Brazilian aging there are some things that are incredibly beneficial to do as we are aging and as women over 40 and women who are in menopause or beyond. So there are some things that I'm like hey, here's this, but it's never. In order to thrive, you must do fill in the blank. Now there's a lot of things like there's so many trends, there's so much stuff out there. There's always something new. I mean, as I'm recording this, I think the carnivore diet is all in the rage and I'm like, oh my gosh, are you kidding me? Like, eat your carbs, have a banana you need, and if you're doing that, that's that's you, that's your autonomy that you have. But no, thank you, I'm just gonna unsubscribe from that. If you're interested in thinking more about how to discern and filter through all of the information, tune into a recent episode I did, which is season 18, episode 25, called 2024 health trends for areas to examine first. So that might help you kind of take that zoom or get to that zoomed out level. Another thing I think we need to have grace for is our changing bodies. Now, again, this is also covered some in the resilient aging, so I will leave that more for the next episode. But giving ourselves grace for our changing bodies is something that is equally Important and ridiculously hard to do. I am in that right now. It is so hard. It is so hard to put on clothes that used to fit and now don't. It is so hard to wear cute tops that I bought a year ago and Now don't look like they used to. When I'm looking at the pictures, it is so hard to see my friends seemingly not struggle with this, and yet I am. I am so when I say grace for our changing bodies, I am right there with you if you are struggling with this as well. In fact, I probably need to go back and listen to the episode with Stephanie snow. She came on in season 15, episode 13. I got a lot of positive feedback about that episode, and that one was called changing bodies due to menopause. Here's how to help your mindset. She offered just such wonderful gentle wisdom and I encourage you to go listen to that if you are in that same boat that I am. And then, finally, and from the grace perspective, I think we need to give ourselves grace from the standards set by anyone else but God. You will hear in a few episodes that my faith drives everything I do, and if you've been with me, this is probably not a surprise, as I'll talk a little more in the third episode of this. Not every episode is Christ sinnered, though it is filtered through the lens of my faith. Having said that, I love Romans 12 to that. This has kind of become the verse that I have been Leaning on when I'm trying to explain what I do or help someone along who is stuck in this mindset that we have to look a certain way or I have to be the same size that I was 20 years ago or 10 years ago or even five years ago. But Romans 12 to says do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is, his good, pleasing and perfect will. God does not ask us to eat a certain way, to exercise a certain way, to have a certain size body, and the pattern of this world often says we do, we do. I have to transform my mind, I have to renew my mind on a daily basis, especially sometimes right now, that what I am doing and how I eat and how I move Is to support what God is calling me to do. And again, if you've been listening for a while, you've, you've heard this For years. I have opened this podcast saying you're eating, movement and body don't have to be perfect. You just need to be able to do what you're called to do. I still Just believe that wholeheartedly, but I'm trying to move away from the word perfect because, like, what is perfect? Who gets to define what perfect is? Like, perfect is like this, this thing, I mean what, what is it anyway? So I'm just kind of I'm just I'm done with talking about that, I'm done with opening that I have. I want to set that to the side and and focus on something a bit different, which is why you heard a different intro in today's episode. The other thing I'm learning is this journey is not about perfection. It is about figuring out what makes you feel and function well by eating the foods that do this and the movement Supports. We will talk more about this in the next episode, about doing this as we age. So that is the R and the a, which is resilient aging. So stay tuned, come back next time for resilient aging as I dig into that and what you will get here on the Grace health podcast To help you age resiliently. The other thing to is one more note about grace. I have put this on my mugs. I have put this on stickers. I have put this on water bottles. I have put full of grace On all of my merch, as as it's called, so I want to explain that really quickly, what that means to me full of grace. So one thing is full of grace for ourselves. We need to give ourselves a lot of grace and even just not even in the health focus health world like this I have been beating myself up over some things that I did not get done, even though I had the best of intentions with my business, and I'm trying to give myself grace about that. I need grace on words that I have used in my relationships or ways that I have treated other people or places. I've dropped the ball Like. We all need grace, right, like these are areas that I'm trying to give myself grace in. So full of grace definitely means for ourselves. Full of grace, I believe, also means for others. This isn't really in the health space. I don't need to tell you how angry the world feels right now, how challenging it can be to get on social media and, by the way, if you've gotten off of social media, I applaud you. I've really considered doing that in my business. It's just it's hard to be on, but I think we need to give others grace. When they don't think like us, when they don't act like us, you never know what kind of day they've been having, you never know how they got to where they are, and I know this is hard, I know it's very hard. But if we can just give others some grace, I believe that we can just make the world a kinder place, even if we don't understand it. So that's the others. And then the final one is really just kind of an inside joke with me and my family and I'll let you in on it. So my grandfather. We would go visit him about once a month when I was growing up. So I lived, I grew up in Oklahoma and he lived like an hour and a half or two hours away. So we would go visit him a lot and he was, he had mobility issues cause he had a bad hip and he was a wonderful man but also kind of a crotchety old man. And forever when we would go visit him I would hear him say over and over ah, you're full of prunes, ah, you're full of prunes. I never got it. I'm like eight years old going. What the heck Like? What in the world Like? What does that mean? What does that mean? Well, it was finally, when I was an adult and I realized what prunes do to you when you have a lot of them. So I think that was his PG version of saying something else that I won't say on here, cause then I'd have to put an E by this podcast. So, anyway, that it just makes me think of him and it makes me smile, and there were some things that I think I think the creative aspect of what gives me a lot of energy I got from him and so I remember him fondly and I remember him saying ah, you're full of prunes. So the full of grace is just a little bit of an homage to him, and I do not hope that you are full of prunes, and I hope that you do not think that I am full of prunes, but I do hope that you are full of grace in all the ways. So we will talk about resilient aging in the next episode. Until then, be full of grace, thank you.