Ep 107: Stop the Endless Search for “Happiness” with Eunicia Peret

You ever wonder what success actually means?

How do you get it?

And how do you keep it?

We all want it yet sometimes it feels only some of us get to have it.

Hi, Theresa and Blair here we are to badass entrepreneurs, best selling authors, coaches and business mentors who have had success, built success, questioned our own success and reclaimed it. Let's be real for a hot minute. 2020 has been a roller coaster ride, and many of us a start to wonder if the loser things that made them successful. So we got curious, Ron real about what success is truly about?

Can you put it in a box?

How can you get it?

Can people take it away? Or are you the one with the power?

Does it mean the same to all of us? Or are we the ones that create it?

From PGA golf pros to doctors, CEOs, entrepreneurs and spiritual mentors. We get together to meet with successful people from around the globe to dissect success for vibrant conversations and interviews. Make sure you click the subscribe button on the app store because each week we will drop a new episode to bust through the myths around success and dissect its true meaning.

Hello, hello and welcome back to another fabulous episode of dissecting success. I am here with the fabulous Blair Kaplan Venables. We are recording an amazing episode and we have a brilliant guest with us today which we literally just met Eunicia Peret. She is a seasoned executive and business owner, accomplished financial consultant mentor and educator and the CEO and founder of empowered financial planner. On your own journey, she went from rebuilding her financial independence from nearly nothing to over six figures in less than a year so exciting, using the same methodology that she now uses with our clients and I can't wait to hear more about that. In addition, she has worked with and said hundreds of clients on their path to financial independence and wealth optimization yuneisia as a senior contributor to brands magazine and collaborate with many globally known thought leadership experts. In her past she's worked with the world's most renowned financial organization such as Citi Bank, Amex, Aviva soundtracks, and more. She's also a trusted adviser to top level executives and invested heavily in identifying lending practices when it comes to delivering value to our clients. And Eunicia is very passionate about seeing true transformation in a client's financial success stories. And we are so so excited to have her here. And to have this conversation and to learn more how this also proud mom of two amazing children uses her time to support people financially and create success and optimize health. Hello, we are here for it. Welcome Eunicia

thank you so much for having me, Theresa and Blair, I listening to you talk a little bit about who I am in my past was was having me ask my question is that truly me out there. So thank you for that.

I love that. I love that. So Eunicia we always like to start this conversation by really diving into success and what it means to you. So what comes up when I asked you that question,

what comes up for me when you asked me the question about success is I envision my myself in a place of content. Instead contentedness, happiness, peace, peace and contentedness with everything that may either be happening in my life, whether it be positive or negative, all because it's what we do and what I do, meets me and and meet my goals and my desires and who I want to show up, as in the world. And I will tell you that I've evaluated that evaluated that for myself many, many times, especially when times get tough to say, is this what success actually looks like? And the reality is that yes, success doesn't just come it's not always a bed of roses, the more we can focus on how do we find that silver lining even when adversities come our way has actually led us on so much better of a stepping forward path towards even more of a success. I love

that I think that's so powerful. And, you know, with your background and finance and with what you just shared, I think one of the things that sort of like came through me as you were sharing that is that I have found especially when it comes to success, people attach the idea of what success is or not is so often to how how much money we have in our bank account. And I feel like that is a layer that, you know, you could probably bring in and talk about a little bit more. Because it sounds like you've had some experience around times where you were abundant with money, but also times where money wasn't there. And, and you still found your way to really defining success as something that's contentment, happiness and peace, regardless of what's happening, which I really, really love. So can you speak a little bit more about that, and maybe your story of how that all came to be?

Absolutely. As a matter of fact, I will tell you that I've been very fortunate to have actually true financial success all along. It's been I've been in financial services, worked as a strategy consultant, built my expertise, built, my career, rose up all the way to the top. And all throughout that time, I did make a lot of money. But what I found myself and what we find out found ourselves kind of the situation that we were finding ourselves as a family, and it was always going from, it was literally that paycheck to paycheck the month to month. And it wasn't because there was a lack of money, it was this, this constant search to your point for that happiness, right? A lot of people tie happiness to eccentric vacations to, you know, doing all the things and buying all the things that you want, because either you have money or if you don't have money, and also thinking about how you would desire all that. And what I will tell you is that when we took when I took even more personal a step back, to try to understand what had been happening with us and why frankly, we were bringing in high incomes, yet we were still it felt like breaking even almost every month, what I realized was that this mindset of connecting our success to money is not a healthy mindset. And that if we can start thinking about how do we secure our own financial independence and our own financial decoupling the the money that comes in, and the desire to continue to, to just grow the money that comes in and start paying ourselves so that we can see our own bottom line growing, a beautiful mindset, shift happens, because we no longer feel the pressure for the money, we no longer feel the pressure, we want to get increases in salary and continue to grow our businesses, etc. But it's not, we're doing it more from a place of fulfillment rather than from a place of scarcity and constantly wanting more. Because we have that, that level of support, generated frankly, by by the money and by the wealth that we've generated by focusing on ourselves. So I gave you an answer that was probably a lot more complex than individuals that have not gone through that have experienced, but because you guys are working with successful business owners and entrepreneurs that are looking to take their businesses to the next level, one of my guiding posts for anybody that's in the situation is don't just focus on the career, don't just focus on the business, learn to take some of that and pay yourself, set some of that wealth aside, so that you know, and you have that confidence in your heart that anything that gets thrown your way is going to be fine, you're going to be fine. Because then in turn will give you peace in your heart. And individuals that go through that then can focus on truly mastering success, because now they've got that peace and joy.

Whoo, so good. You know, I'm talking about money, and finances is something that always makes me really uncomfortable. And it's my money trauma from my childhood. And you know, I'm getting better at it. So it's always really interesting to talk to professionals, you know, in the financial planning for the world, because my mind starts going to all these places and what you just said about how you, you know, we're living paycheck to paycheck, but you're bringing lots of money in, like, how do we make that besides the mind shift? Like, what do we do to fix that? Like, if I'm making 10k a month, but at the end of the month, there's $0? Like, what's the shift there, besides the mind shift? Like what, what are some tips that we can do?

The shift, it's actually a shift that it's very easily articulated, the very hard to implement, the shift is having a truly customized plan that works for you. Works for You, Blair, the same thing that's going to work for you is not going to work for me, it's probably not going to work for anybody else. Certainly not for Theresa for various reasons. And one of the things that you just mentioned is that personal situation, right whatever. Either it was, there was a trauma or your goals and aspirations are different or your business or your career is in a different place. Every single one of those things brings in a different level of nuance that makes it really hard to say the same strategy that everybody else's heart is implementing out there, because that's how Financial Services works is going to work for you. And frankly, when I personally started looking at what we were and why our situation was, our wealth optimization wasn't further ahead. What I realized because of my strategy consulting expertise is that as individuals, but also a successful business owners and executives that are making bringing in a ton of money, we have these issues, this issue where we, we don't know that we have options, by the way, we're leaving money on the table, we're flushing money down the toilet, at every single turn, we're paying too much in taxes, the way that money is invested, we're either losing money, or we're not making enough money, because we don't have access to the strategies or, frankly, the Uber wealthy have. And then last but not least, when it comes time to think about long term wealth and retirement income and exit planning strategies for companies, nobody wants to look backwards, because it's so hard. But if we are able to generate that power, as part of a comprehensive and truly customized plan at an individual, or at a company level to say how do we work things backwards, if we want to be at point XYZ, in the next 510 15 years? What is it that we need to do to chart that path between where we're at and where we want to be? And what what we found is that by having an approach to actually do that an approach that is unique to each one of us, based on our own quirkiness or frankly, based on or or situations, then, again, that piece comes in because now it's not just you're implementing a solution that somebody is recommending, you're implementing something that you understand, because you understand how that fits that particular solution or solutions may fit into the broader scheme of the opportunities that are available to you.

So you're saying that when I make my first million dollars, I shouldn't go out and buy a $25,000? Cartier Jaguar diamond, diamond crested, like ring? I really want to,

I mean, you could you could and here's what I would tell you if you still really want to, absolutely. But what I would also tell you is that by the time you make the million dollars, if you do things right, this is not about waiting, gaining financial independence and building financial independence and wealth. First of all, wealth, wealth is relative, someone you know what wealth means to one person may be different to somebody else. And so that's why I want to make sure that the people that are listening, in some cases, it's okay to to change out wealth for success. What does success may not look like to you financially. But my argument would be that if you do things, right, by the time you earn that million dollars, your financial situation, you already got to be financially independent. If you do things right, you should be. And then if you want to spend $25,000, on that blank, blank, as long as it's, let's just make sure that it is made out of, of a precious metal, then fine, maybe we can turn around and look at it as some sort of an investment and blink, blink, blink blink, but you're not gonna make it from a scarcity standpoint, right? You're gonna make a very informed decision to say I want it and I can afford it. Because even if I do it,

I'm fine. Yeah, you know, it's interesting, because that's kind of how I always live, I come not from a scarcity, but from a place of abundance. And I've always been that way. And it's almost like to a fault. But you know, I was just having a conversation with a friend and I said, once I make my first million to celebrate, I want to get one of those Cartier rings. Because to me, maybe when I reach that milestone, that'll be like an indication that like, I feel filthy rich, but who knows how I'll feel, you know, I do have goals to hit my seven figures, not this year, but next year, like not 2023. And if I do that's amazing for 2024. That's my goal. And it's really interesting, though, because my words like Theresa, and I pick words how to and how do we want to feel at the end of the year, and my word it for 2023 is bountiful. And my the way I want to feel is healthy, wealthy and happy. So it's very interesting that we're having this conversation.

Absolutely. And what I can tell you is that, again, feeling healthy, wealthy and happy, I love I love the way that you guys are thinking because more people should be thinking like that. It's not just about the end goal. And the end end of the journey is the journey along the line along that path. And oftentimes I get the question of, but you need to and you mentioned that even earlier, right? Let's say that you bring in even $50,000 a month and money comes in money goes out and at the end of the day, there's barely anything left over. Okay, what do you do in that situation? Oftentimes, I get the question of uni said there's no money left over to build my own wealth. And when we sit down and we truly look, we tried to decipher how does that money gets spent, not from a place of shamefulness or embarrassing anybody because maybe they have a lot of frivolous spending. But how Helping them understand that, hey, purchasing a high end purse every other month or once a year or whatever that looks like for them, does it really help them having that additional item, whatever that item looks like, versus saying, You know what? I'm not going to completely sacrifice all that. I'll continue doing it. But let's be smart and figure out how much of that extra spent that maybe we shouldn't have? Can we take and start paying ourselves so that you can, we will continue to have again, we don't want to completely cut some of these things, because that will throw people some people in a tailspin. But rather saying, How can we continue to build wealth? How can we take and redeploy some of those assets to actually build wealth and get that confidence that we're okay. And mindset wise, what ends up happening is when people do that, it's a very hard thing to do. And that's why it's awesome when individuals work with people that they know, like, and trust that can help guide them through that mindset shift. Because when that happens, their spending habits will continue to change, they're going to go out there shopping, and they're gonna say, You know what, I really don't need this, fill in the blank, whatever it is, because that same money set aside in whatever different strategies are taking place that are actually helping the money advance and grow, are going to deliver a lot more value than that particular object.

Yeah, I feel like this is such an important conversation to have, and also around, you know, you have money coming in, but it goes out as fast as it comes in. And, you know, for me, like, even just like this year, and the journey that I've been on, and what's been happening in my life, like, for me, true wealth is really more like emotional wealth. Like, it's really being able to, to feel the way I want to feel like it's about fulfillment, peace, satisfaction, love, like, it's really being relaxed in my life, and being able to build my business, having, you know, supportive relationships in my life. Like, for me, wealth is so much broader. But of course, there was a financial aspect to it, I know that we can't live off, you know, like, I'm not, you know, obviously, there's a lot of people in business. So, you know, it's not about that. But one thing that I really realized for me is that there is a balance. And you mentioned this a couple of times, paying yourself and one of the things that I have seen and I've certainly done that in business is just reinvesting everything that came in and more knowing that I'm building a future and I'm building my business but but literally not regularly paying me and one of the big shifts that I made this year was like, no, like, I'm paying myself every single month. I invested some money into precious metals actually. And like, I really started looking at like things differently. But I really took a more like, I really was financially humbled for a bit of 2022. And I, I wanted to create a more responsible relationship with money. And also really thinking about what makes me feel good and what makes me feel safe. And I think for dismantling, and taking a lot away, I got I got divorced, and I got rid of most of my stuff. And that's in a storage unit. Now Now I'm traveling with two bags, I minimized I dismantled ibdv allies that I don't really need a lot. And to your point, now I see things and I'm like, Oh, that would be nice. But I'm like, I don't really need it. And so it's really interesting how my spending habits have changed. Because of that, because I'm like, Well, I don't need all these extra clothes. For example, blas. I only have two bags, and I don't have room but like, even that, like I'm having clothes that I have with me that I haven't even warm. Because literally I don't even and I really don't have a lot with me like. So somebody who used to have like a full closet, like it's a big thing. I have like, put together a capsule wardrobe. But I pretty much wear the same stuff all the time. And now that I'm in a tropical destination, I feel like I wear a bathingsuit

But Isn't that powerful? Yeah, that's so powerful to me. It's like it's not. And I love the fact that you brought that example because it's really not sure material things can add happiness, perhaps temporarily. But when we realize that it's really not the material things. It's how we feel on the inside and that peace and that contentedness that we have that you're feeling and you're able to travel the world and have fun and enjoy it and meanwhile you're building a business. You're setting money aside, arguably, again, that wealth is relatives just like we said earlier into you, it means something else. But you're also realizing that, hey, if we do these things in tandem, then the long term trajectory is going to continue to bring that fulfillment and that sense of fulfillment on multiple fronts, not just one or two. And that in itself, I think takes us right back to the few what everybody that is searching for success can find for themselves, if they so choose to actually do the hard work, go through their emotions and actually get to that place of happiness.

Totally, and hold on to their wealth, you know, to your point, I mean, don't get me wrong, when I make a million, I'm going to go celebrate, and I'll probably buy myself something beautiful, but I don't know what that is. That could be you know, I have no idea what that is going to be, but, but I feel like I'm doing there's something very empowering to also really say, Hey, I, you know, earning a great income, and I'm earning a great living, and I'm putting that money to work. So I can build more wealth and continue to be in a financial situation that allows me and affords me to live the life that I want to live and really build it while also living the way that you want. You know, like, I'm definitely not one for restricting and, and I don't know, Blair might have a few more things that she's going to share about that because I feel like, you know, I feel like, for me, it's like we live now and I want to live now, like I don't want to like Neff stack everything away for when I think I'm going to be 80 To be honest, because I've I just don't believe that that is really going to benefit us because we don't know when the time is up for us. But at the same time, I also believe in building wealth and creating something that allows us to really maximize and

earning, you know, bright and you said something very, very key there, Teresa that I want to make sure we don't lose sight of because there are so many individuals that feel the same way. They don't want to live life, feeling like they're constantly putting things off for the future. And oftentimes what we find when we take on new clients, by the way, we mentioned you're mentioning financial advisors at the very beginning, we don't focus on the financial advisory aspect in terms of saying, Hey, we're financial advisors, the name of the companies is a little bit deceiving. There's, there's there's a reason for that, not because we want it to be deceiving, but where we started and what it's grown into the last several years is just beautiful. But what we're finding is that when individuals set that money aside, one of the big, big questions is what is it that we want the money to do for us, frankly, and that's a question that the financial services industry doesn't ask financial advisors, financial experts, their job is to take those assets and to do something with them to invest them. The focus, though, for the client shouldn't be just the investments, the investments, there are so many different ways, so many different opportunities to explore that, unfortunately, clients don't really understand and that's our job for them to understand what are their opportunities, but even bigger, even before that discussion ever comes up? One big thing that we have to focus on is what do we want that wealth, that money, that pot of gold, that you're setting aside? What do you want? What do you need it to do for you. Because when wealth is grown in a way that is flexible, whether you need to use it or you want to use it earlier or later, it should not come with a ton of strings attached. Unfortunately, however, most individuals when they're setting money aside, the money is basically it comes with strings attached to their money, and they attached all of these strings to that money. And only by the time they get later on in life, they realize we should like were there any options that we could have done to where we don't have all these entanglements. And by that point in time, it's undoing the mistakes that we could have avoided if we just understood what our options are, are. So I encourage people to not just, you know, as you're thinking, Oh, I'm putting money in my 401 K, or I've got a separate I've got an IRA. Those are those are things those are different types of treatments that that jargon that happens in the in the industry. Have we answered the question individually for each one of us? What do we want the money to do? And then look at the options that can actually deliver that for us versus starting the other way around?

So do we have to put money aside? I had three parents in about a year, all in their 60s, die. None of them retired. Well, my dad did when he was disabled. My mom saving for retirement dropped dead three weeks out for diagnosis, same with my father in law, he was preparing to retire, never got to retire. So I'm super jaded about the concept of like, I do put money aside, but it's not exorbitant amounts. Because I want to live my life now. And I don't want those strings attached. Like I'm the other end of the spectrum where I'm like, I got shit to do, I got places to go and people to see. Because, like, Who knows if I'm going to drop dead tomorrow or at age 50? Like, I'm only 37. But I don't, I don't want to be like my parents generation.

It's a great question. And I think you answered it for yourself. It's not just about saving money, putting money aside so that we can have it sometimes at some point, at some point in time after we retire. That's not the point. The point is to know that the money that you set aside, if if the idea of we don't want strings attached to our money is so strong, then why is it that the only option that the industry really talks about is the money that has strings attached? Right? Because you want to live you want to know that that money is there, if you do live to the 100, wonderful, oh, god nervous you. But if you don't at the same time, you have access to it, and you get to use it whenever you want to not when you're an only after you're 59 and a half, because otherwise, you're going to incur all sorts of penalties. Yeah. Right.

This conversation, like it's just fascinating, because like my mind shift, my mind shift around money has changed over the last couple years, and I have a lot of work to do. And this is just brilliant. So as we're winding this conversation down or up, because whichever way you want to look at it feels

like we need to do a 2.0. I know

I know. Okay, so, two questions. I'll start with one. How can people find you? Where can people find you,

the easiest way for them to find us is to go to our website, www dot empowered financial planner.com There's a way to send us a chat, a chat message there. Also, we are on social media, you can look up for either yuneisia pride or the Empowered financial planner, or for individuals that want to know more even just about our philosophy, and what are some of those things that we've seen historically, or harming people, when it comes to building that wealth, again, whatever wealth means to you, we have a giveaway. It's a short PDF, white paper that I'd love for folks to just take and read, I guarantee there's going to be some sort of a golden nugget that folks will go, Aha, wish I would have known this before. It's never too late. It's better to start later. Rather than ever, they can find that out at www dot empowered financial planner.com forward slash pitfalls, and I'm sure you guys will probably include those links in there. Do me a favor that if you go and you get those pitfalls, the five financial pitfalls to avoid, you will be given an option to schedule a connect call with us on that connect call if you have questions and different things that we could potentially address, feel free to, to go ahead and book it. And very importantly, let us know that you heard about it here on the dissecting success podcast. And it'll be our pleasure to figure out if we're not the right solution for you. And we're not the right solution for everybody. At a minimum, you'll hopefully have some answers that could potentially make the difference between you feeling successful financially and perhaps not.

I love that. Oh, so good. And what advice do you have for people who want who are on the path to wealth, who are on the path to success,

to not put it off under the premise that we will get to that million dollars or whatever that that Utopia looks like for you in terms of revenue, in terms of income, in terms of salary, whatever that looks like, start, whatever it were, start wherever you're at. And don't ever, ever allow yourself to have the feeling of I'm not worthy enough, I don't make enough there's not enough leftover. I'll do it later, procrastination, whatever it is that you call it. At the end of the day, it all sums up to the same avoidance do not allow avoidance to settle then because that avoidance brings up questions, and I would welcome our guests to just monitor this in their lives. Their avoidance will bring up questions, and then we'll dismiss the question and another question will pop up. And those questions will be never ending. They'll continue to compound and get to the next level. And then we'll circle back around when we answer the questions when we allow ourselves to actually start working on those problems. put ourselves in the mindset of prosperity and success and knowing that we're starting small, potentially, maybe not. A beautiful thing will happen. Our mindset will change, our level of questions will go up and because of that our financial success and our ultimate happiness, and fulfillment will continue to go up as well in a way that's more meaningful to us. And it's not. It's not dreadful, because we keep hearing the same questions coming up. Right we'll be energized by new and better things. Beautiful advice.

Also, personally it lands and makes me uncomfortable. and reminds me of the things I'm avoiding. So thank you. We really appreciate you coming on to dissect success with me and Teresa, thank you to everyone who tuned in for another episode. We'll be back next week to dissect success with you.

Thank you. Thank you so much, ladies.

Peace

That's a wrap for another episode of dissecting success. enjoyed this episode. Make sure to subscribe to Blair Kaplan Venables and Theresa Lambert's podcast dissecting success on the App Store.