Sign up to get updates from us
Some beliefs give us wings, unleash our creative genius and help us to dig deep when the going gets tough. Others can be the prison walls of our mind, which keep us locked in our imagined limitations. Depending on our early imprints, our core beliefs may place a stronger emphasis on safety or happiness.
So how do you erase and replace limiting beliefs that hold you back from growing and expanding into a more confident and empowered version of yourself?
Dr Friedemann’s Takeaways:
Intro (00:00)
What Are You Doing With Your Belief? (4:37)
I Am Not Good Enough (9:18)
Bring In Your New Self (17:29)
Subconscious Takes Over (22:53)
Meet Dr Friedemann
WATCH THE EPISODE: https://youtu.be/uC8Kpj4LX6Y
Learn more at: https://DrFriedemann.com
Social Media:
FACEBOOK: https://www.facebook.com//DrFriedemann
INSTAGRAM: https://www.instagram.com/dr.friedemannschaub
PINTEREST: https://www.pinterest.com/drfriedemann
TWITTER: https://www.twitter.com/DrFriedemannS
LINKEDIN: https://www.linkedin.com/in/drfriedemannschaub/
Friedemann Schaub, MD, PhD, is the award-winning author of The Fear + Anxiety Solution. Dr. Schaub has helped thousands of people with his Personal Breakthrough and Empowerment program to overcome their fear and anxiety by addressing the deeper, subconscious root causes of these emotional challenges.
Are you looking for more from Dr Friedemann? Check out his “Your Accelerated Breakthrough Program” https://drfriedemann.com/breakthrough-program/.
Thanks for listening!
Thanks so much for listening to our podcast! If you enjoyed this episode and think that others could benefit from listening, please share it using the social media buttons on this page.
Do you have some feedback or questions about this episode? Leave a comment in the section below!
Subscribe to the podcast
If you would like to get automatic updates of new podcast episodes, you can subscribe to the podcast on iTunes or Stitcher. You can also subscribe from the podcast app on your mobile device.
Leave us an iTunes review
Ratings and reviews from our listeners are extremely valuable to us and greatly appreciated. They help our podcast rank higher on iTunes, which exposes our show to more awesome listeners like you. If you have a minute, please leave an honest review on iTunes.
Do you know what holds you back in life? Why you don't
Unknown:really have what you want, or why you're still struggling with
Unknown:anxiety and maybe feel in general stuck? Well, the reason
Unknown:is not your circumstances you're in, or the people you're dealing
Unknown:with, or your bad luck. The reason is that you're held back
Unknown:by your beliefs, and especially your limiting core beliefs. Now,
Unknown:beliefs in general, are a topic that I think is incredibly
Unknown:important, but we usually don't talk about, and we usually don't
Unknown:get taught what to do with beliefs. But beliefs are
Unknown:ultimately the way the subconscious mind is defining
Unknown:your personal universe. When you think about, you know how you
Unknown:grew up, let's say you had some bad experiences, you know, you
Unknown:sang in front of the class, and everyone was laughing, you had a
Unknown:parent who always told you, well, you're not smart enough,
Unknown:or you do things wrong. And maybe you had some friends that
Unknown:all sudden ditched you and felt like, well, there are some other
Unknown:people that are more interesting. Well, probably at
Unknown:some point, you didn't feel very comfortable and very safe. And
Unknown:that's a moment when the subconscious says, Oh, hold on
Unknown:here, we have to do something. And that means we have to make
Unknown:sense out of this so that you are not getting hurt. And this
Unknown:is when beliefs start, they kind of gave the subconscious a
Unknown:playbook on, what's the best way to navigate through this life,
Unknown:and heart. And a limiting belief such as I am not good enough,
Unknown:can come from those experiences. Now, a belief is like a really
Unknown:huge filter, it's massive, because it really keeps out a
Unknown:lot of the information. And lets in only the information that
Unknown:makes sense to the belief Tobio Imagine yourself like, you know,
Unknown:walking through life like this, you know, left and right, don't
Unknown:see it, all you see is this little tunnel vision of the
Unknown:things that your subconscious is highlighting. And when you don't
Unknown:feel good enough, you probably have been highlighting every
Unknown:fault. Everything that go went wrong, every person that has
Unknown:rejected you throughout the years, because that fits in to
Unknown:the belief that I personally have believed I'm not good
Unknown:enough. So I know how one day I had to give a speech. And
Unknown:afterwards, there was some evaluation and I got, you know,
Unknown:28 good ones. And one was critical. While naturally I was
Unknown:focusing only on the one that was critical. All the other ones
Unknown:I completely ignored, didn't matter didn't really fit into my
Unknown:system. So when you have a limiting belief, you usually
Unknown:live under its guardianship, and you don't even know it, you just
Unknown:have a distorted way of seeing the world and yourself. And for
Unknown:anxiety, for example, the beliefs that keep us anxious are
Unknown:the beliefs like I'm not good enough, or I'm not safe, I
Unknown:cannot trust anyone, or I'm not lovable, I don't fit in. In my
Unknown:practice, I find that these are the most common beliefs that
Unknown:keep the anxiety fueled, because all we can see is there's just
Unknown:more danger to get rejected or get ridiculed or harmed out
Unknown:there. And so we either go into avoidance mode and try to stay
Unknown:invisible, or we go into pleasing mode and try to get
Unknown:approval from others.
Unknown:So what are you gonna do with a belief? I mean, obviously, since
Unknown:they come from way back, wouldn't it be nice if we could
Unknown:just take a time machine, erase the past, and all would be good.
Unknown:But there is actually something like a time machine. It's called
Unknown:timeline therapy or pattern resolution process. And these
Unknown:are things I'm working with and they do allow you on a
Unknown:subconscious level, to literally go back and see your past from a
Unknown:different perspective, resolve some of those old questions and
Unknown:confusions that your subconscious has held on to and
Unknown:literally rewrite history. The problem is, that doesn't
Unknown:necessarily change your beliefs. Because if you have even though,
Unknown:I mean, maybe you have done some work, maybe you have done a lot
Unknown:of comedy counseling, and you really felt like I talked about
Unknown:the past, and I work through it. And I feel like I don't have any
Unknown:longer nightmares of what happened there. But you still
Unknown:have that belief, you still don't feel safe, or you still
Unknown:don't feel good enough. So you will still act accordingly. And
Unknown:you will still see the world accordingly. And as it is, with
Unknown:limiting beliefs, they are reinforcing themselves because
Unknown:we are creating self fulfilling prophecies with them. As with
Unknown:I'm not good enough, if you do feel you're not good enough,
Unknown:let's say, for example, to have a relationship, well, chances
Unknown:are that you're not really the best self at your first date. Or
Unknown:that when you are in a relationship, that you somehow
Unknown:is sabotaging it, so that in the end, the relationship gonna end
Unknown:because you told yourself, well see, it's happening, what I
Unknown:already predicted would happen, I am not good enough. And you're
Unknown:not seeing that maybe you were just too needy or too closed
Unknown:off. Or maybe you were not really fully invested. Because
Unknown:you were thinking that this relationship doesn't work out
Unknown:based on your belief. So limiting beliefs have a lot of
Unknown:power than also just to keep themselves going. So if you
Unknown:would just erase the past, the beliefs will still run your
Unknown:life. If that's not enough, what about letting go the beliefs,
Unknown:again, possible subconscious work is very much something you
Unknown:can do. However, if you would wake up one morning, and you
Unknown:would have all those limiting beliefs gone, no more, I'm not
Unknown:lovable, I don't fit in, I don't measure up, while your
Unknown:subconscious would have a crisis of identity because there would
Unknown:be a huge void, there would be a huge sense of well, now what,
Unknown:and lo and behold your subconscious, because it doesn't
Unknown:like the unknown, the uncertainty, that's why your
Unknown:subconscious doesn't like change, your subconscious would
Unknown:go back to the old belief guy that's familiar, that's
Unknown:something it can relate to. Again, letting go of the
Unknown:limiting belief itself, is not enough either. So then the third
Unknown:option would be actually to replace the limiting belief. And
Unknown:that is exactly what you need to do in order to create a new
Unknown:Owner's Manual of how you want to manifest how you want to
Unknown:maneuver and navigate through life, and ultimately manifest
Unknown:your reality. Now, there are five steps, and I just going to
Unknown:quickly explain those five steps to you because I find they're so
Unknown:important to have in your toolbox. The first step is that
Unknown:you define a new belief, I believe that you really feel
Unknown:like okay, this is what I want to replace the old one with.
Unknown:Now, that new belief needs to be really, really relatable and
Unknown:believable. So for example, if you would be, you know,
Unknown:completely broke, and you would want to have a new belief that
Unknown:says I'm a millionaire. Well, your mind would say, yes, you
Unknown:are off the rocker, I don't believe a word and it would
Unknown:still hold on to the old belief. But if you would say, I can get
Unknown:out of debt, I have the inner resources to be more successful
Unknown:or to be a good money manager, then your mind your subconscious
Unknown:would say, okay, we can work with that.
Unknown:I am not good enough. Well, maybe I am enough, isn't enough,
Unknown:because it's not juicy enough. But if you would say, I believe
Unknown:in my gifts and qualities to create the life that I want, or
Unknown:for I am not lovable. You could say I appreciate and accept
Unknown:myself for who I am. And new belief is really useful when
Unknown:it's coming from an i statement I have or I am and it's defining
Unknown:how you want to relate to yourself. So an old belief of, I
Unknown:am not safe, you could turn into I am the source of my safety and
Unknown:well being. So find your own words for a new belief, not too
Unknown:long, fairly short, but again, it needs to be interesting and
Unknown:believable. And you can look up at affirmations that are really
Unknown:ultimately new positive belief systems that may resonate with
Unknown:you. But as you will see in a moment, affirmations are not in
Unknown:itself enough to reach the subconscious. Second step is
Unknown:that You want to enliven this new belief. Remember, the old
Unknown:belief, the limiting belief is pretty much telling you this
Unknown:story of the distorted version of reality, and it has plenty of
Unknown:ideas why you're not good enough or not safe or not lovable, or
Unknown:any of those things. So you need to now juice up this new belief
Unknown:with also evidence that says, oh, yeah, actually, now that I
Unknown:look at it, I am good enough. Because I, let's say, I had
Unknown:completed my driver's license, I did finish high school, I am
Unknown:holding a job since a while and I actually have done really good
Unknown:work, or I have been taking care of my ailing mother, and was
Unknown:really very reliable and loyal there. And you don't have to
Unknown:really, you know, invent the cure for cancer or find world
Unknown:peace. It's just something that you can see, every day that
Unknown:there is so much goodness, and there is so much pot, there are
Unknown:so many positive qualities about you, that it should be easy for
Unknown:you to realize I am actually good enough. I just never really
Unknown:honored myself for this or saw myself as good enough, because
Unknown:somehow, I always got distracted by this old belief. Same thing
Unknown:with being lovable. I mean, you can even ask your friends, what
Unknown:do you like about me? What do you think are qualities that are
Unknown:really good about me. And that will also tell you then yeah,
Unknown:you know what I can actually accept and appreciate myself. So
Unknown:find evidence go through, you know, your life, your current
Unknown:life, not only what you do, or what you did, but also who you
Unknown:are compassionate, kind, courageous, resilient, all of
Unknown:those qualities that can really give you a much better sense of
Unknown:self. And then, the third step is that you are translating
Unknown:these, this new belief with all its qualities, into the language
Unknown:of the subconscious. And the language of the subconscious is
Unknown:very simple. It's word I mean, it's not words. That's the
Unknown:conscious, it's images. It's emotion sensations. And, you
Unknown:know, in general, anything that feels like an experience. So
Unknown:when you think about the, the subconscious language, and you
Unknown:would have just an affirmation, now, something that would sound
Unknown:really nice, but you don't feel anything about it, you cannot
Unknown:visualize what that would look like, you don't have a sense of
Unknown:what feel in your body. Your subconscious says, Well, this is
Unknown:gibberish. To me, I
Unknown:don't know what you're talking about. But I'm certainly not
Unknown:taking this on. So that's why you want to translate this new
Unknown:belief into something that subconscious can understand. So
Unknown:think about it. If your new belief is I accept and
Unknown:appreciate myself, think about when there was maybe a moment
Unknown:where you felt acceptance or appreciation, maybe, you know,
Unknown:there was something where you did really well. Or maybe even
Unknown:someone gave you a pat on the back, that's totally fine. As
Unknown:long as you felt good about yourself. And when you feel this
Unknown:feeling, imagine then if you could really be this person,
Unknown:what would you see? Or what would you hear? And what would
Unknown:you taste? And how would your body posture be? So these are
Unknown:all translations into the language of the subconscious.
Unknown:And once you really see yourself and feel yourself in the new
Unknown:belief, it may take a few minutes to get there, then put
Unknown:the old belief next to you and really see then the difference
Unknown:between the two. What is the old? What is in you? And that's
Unknown:step number four, you are really imagining now, okay, so if I
Unknown:have the old belief, I'm not good enough. I'm not lovable.
Unknown:I'm not safe. And I imagine myself going through another
Unknown:year, another five years in the future with this belief? How
Unknown:does my life look like? What will happen and what will not
Unknown:happen? Maybe I will never find really happiness. Maybe I will
Unknown:never be in a happy relationship or have a family. Maybe I will
Unknown:always struggle and always look over my shoulder and always
Unknown:isolate myself or always do what others want me to do, and never
Unknown:find my own voice. And then look at the other side, that new
Unknown:belief and imagine how your life would evolve. If you in that new
Unknown:belief will live another year of five years and what would
Unknown:change? Well, maybe you would see yourself advancing in a new
Unknown:country. rear, maybe you have that real loving relationship
Unknown:that you've been looking for. Or maybe you are moving actually
Unknown:away from the town you are and going somewhere else, fantasize,
Unknown:dream it up. But make it realistic. I mean, don't come up
Unknown:with you know, I gonna be an astronaut and live in a space
Unknown:station that's not totally realistic. So get into a
Unknown:framework that you can believe in that that is exciting and
Unknown:motivating. So your subconscious now has two versions of your
Unknown:life. And it has clear evidence from what you're showing your
Unknown:subconscious, you're holding up to maps. And you say, well, this
Unknown:map gets us to this place doesn't feel very good. And this
Unknown:new map, a new belief gets us to another place. And that feels
Unknown:actually really much more enticing and interesting, and it
Unknown:still feels safe, because that is important for the
Unknown:subconscious, that it's not something dangerous or reckless,
Unknown:that potentially could really get you in trouble. So then you
Unknown:have for your subconscious basically laid out what your
Unknown:preference is. And there is a little trick you can do, which
Unknown:is changing your inner representation, your internal
Unknown:representation, which basically means that you are really
Unknown:showing your subconscious from now on, we are going into this
Unknown:new pattern. And so you are making this old belief self,
Unknown:maybe you have seen that self you know already a little bit
Unknown:hunched forward frown in the face, or, you know, just a
Unknown:little bit smaller, because it feels smaller, you make that old
Unknown:self small, small, small, small, dark, and far away from you.
Unknown:Maybe even behind you as a symbol of,
Unknown:it's in the past, it's not something I really want to hold
Unknown:on to. And then you bring the new self, that person that you
Unknown:want to be in front of you make that person bigger, brighter,
Unknown:and really feel also that positive energy, almost like a
Unknown:warmth or light coming from that knew you and feel that is the
Unknown:person that I want to grow into. And that's what I will focus on
Unknown:to become. So that is step number four. And in that step,
Unknown:finish it by visualizing already how your day today or tomorrow
Unknown:will be different. Think about situations that have triggered
Unknown:you in the past, let's say someone was maybe a little bit,
Unknown:uh, you know, critical to you or making a little joke about you?
Unknown:How would you respond from that new belief place? Would you just
Unknown:have a boundary and say, sorry, I don't find this funny? Would
Unknown:you laugh with it? Because you could actually have a sense of
Unknown:humor about yourself? How would you respond? What would be the
Unknown:most resourceful way of living this new belief? And how would
Unknown:you show that let's say you accept and appreciate yourself?
Unknown:Would you just treat yourself again to bad foods and something
Unknown:you know, that upsets your stomach at the end of the day,
Unknown:so that you need to take some anti acid? Or would you actually
Unknown:say no self appreciation,
Unknown:actually also means I'm eating? Well, I'm asking my body what it
Unknown:wants, and I'm going to make sure that I feel good throughout
Unknown:the day. Or maybe this feeling of really believing in yourself
Unknown:or believing in your resources and your strength and qualities,
Unknown:can also mean that you will speak up a little bit more, and
Unknown:you will show more, that you actually are capable and work or
Unknown:you are reaching out to people that in the past, you felt a
Unknown:little hesitant to reach out to because you always felt
Unknown:intimidated. Whatever it is, look for moments throughout the
Unknown:day that you can imagine will be different, and you will feel
Unknown:different when you come from that new belief system. And the
Unknown:fifth point, or the fifth step is then really living it
Unknown:following through the and this is the problem with
Unknown:affirmations. And most of our, you know, it tends to become
Unknown:better. And I often hear people saying, well, I'm meditating 30
Unknown:days, 30 minutes a day, and I'm saying all these affirmations.
Unknown:But when I asked him so what do you do with all of this? They
Unknown:say, Well, I'm pretty much living exactly how I used to
Unknown:live waiting for a miracle to happen that makes me feel
Unknown:different or that makes me act differently. But that's a
Unknown:choice. It's a choice to step into this This new belief, and
Unknown:actually pretend that you already have fully incorporated
Unknown:it. So throughout the day, have your body in that maybe
Unknown:confident or self appreciative posture, slight smile on your
Unknown:face, and walk, talk, and dress and act, the way you feel is an
Unknown:expression of this new belief. Show yourself and the world that
Unknown:you can inhabit a more positive and empowering belief. And it's
Unknown:not the belief that's going to change you, it's you to gather
Unknown:with the belief that will change your life. So act as if, and
Unknown:then during the day, just see that you have these moments of
Unknown:choice, like a choice point where you're reaching this,
Unknown:again, getting triggered, or this familiar habit to just go
Unknown:back to what feels much more, you know, the normal you and you
Unknown:can say, No, I'm not doing this, I will have a boundary when
Unknown:someone just, again pushes me to do something I don't want to do
Unknown:because I accept and appreciate myself. Or I will actually make
Unknown:sure that I Ghana, not procrastinate but follow through
Unknown:because I do believe in my strength and my inner qualities
Unknown:to reach my goals. So just notice when you can already
Unknown:through the day, make a difference, and do it. Because
Unknown:otherwise, all this inner work will just be nice, packed, you
Unknown:know, gift packages that have nothing in sight promises that
Unknown:somehow never come true. And when you do promise to yourself,
Unknown:and you are setting all these high intentions, and then you're
Unknown:not really acting as if you're not really having that self
Unknown:reliability. Well, your subconscious says, I don't trust
Unknown:you, because you have let yourself down. So many times,
Unknown:you have done the opposite of what you said you
Unknown:would do in the opposite, that actually is good for you. So
Unknown:I'll just going to go back and take leadership role. And if
Unknown:your subconscious takes over, chances are it will just go back
Unknown:to that what feels much more familiar and comfortable, which
Unknown:are these old patterns and old beliefs. So make sure that you
Unknown:are following through and then to put a little cherry on the
Unknown:cake. Right in your journal. This is a difference I made
Unknown:today. With my new belief, I gathered more evidence that the
Unknown:belief is true. And that the belief truly is changing my life
Unknown:that there is a difference. It may not be always like in earth
Unknown:shattering. But it will certainly just be palpable
Unknown:enough for you to get more and more motivated to live in this
Unknown:bigger framework to get out of this sticky comfort zone of the
Unknown:old belief and just widen yourself expand into your more
Unknown:empowered and more self reliance self. And then also notice that
Unknown:ultimately you realize one thing that you may have not really
Unknown:realized before, but I believe that's the secret to happiness,
Unknown:that you are the creator of your reality. You may have just
Unknown:created your reality with a very old playbook. And now you're
Unknown:choosing how you want to approach your reality. And that
Unknown:is the ultimate sense of feeling empowered, and feeling that you
