Dressing for Success: Boosting Confidence and Attracting Clients with Patsy Sanders

Catharine O'Leary: Hello, everyone, and welcome back to kickstart the conversation. And with me today I have the lovely Patsy Sanders. I have known Patsy for a little while now she's actually my stylist. But she is an international image stylist coach and master hair stylist, as well as the speaker. And she is known as a total transformation specialist. Basically what she does is, you know, she talks about how you feel in your clothes is as important as how you look in your clothes and what you wear affects your income. Whether you get that job or client and how easily you connect with others, your ability to attract an ideal partner and even how you perceive yourself. So Patsy is on a mission to help other women discover the joy of living in harmony with their true authentic self by finding their own unique style through the element typing system. So Patsy, welcome to kickstart the conversation.

Thank you, Catharine. It's so great to be here. I so love being with you. Thank

Catharine O'Leary: you and I am totally wearing the wrong colors all like I just like it was a thing today. But I'm actually in black. And I'm not supposed to be because it's not my color. But I know it. So I'm owning it. i forgot to change before we got on. But that's when we you and I first went through my typing, I know that I had a hard time actually accepting it because I wear a lot of black or used to used to wear a lot of black used to wear like, you know, it's slimming, you know, and I had all these perceptions of black is slimming and everywhere. Everything goes with black and everyone can wear black. And then you told me that I wasn't supposed to wear black. And I was a little bit devastated. Because most of my wardrobe went out the door. So can you can you maybe talk about it? Well, first let's let's give you a chance to tell us a little bit more about yourself and who you serve, and how you serve them. And then we can get into why I can't wear black.

Okay, well, you know, I serve speakers and entrepreneurs, coaches, you know, people that do in person and zoom events, right. So it's really everybody's a speaker, if you have a business, you're speaking about wherever you're at. So I can tell you a bit about how I got started this because I think that sets the stage for what's going on. So about 15 years ago, I moved to new area, and was trying to get a job and I couldn't and I was just so frustrated because people, they make an assessment about you, right, just by looking at you, they don't even know you. And I was 250 pounds, I dress nice. I knew how to look good. But you know, I had a hard time getting a job. And isn't that interesting. And so the latest statistic is today that people make an assessment about you in the first three to five seconds, they see you and 50 percents on what you're wearing. So, you know, I thought I was I dressed nice and everything. But I was not very comfortable. My own skin I was pretty miserable. I dyed it off on so many times I didn't even know what to do anymore. But then somebody introduced me to a 12 step program for food. And I went from a size 2022 to a six, eight, and about eight months. And I've stayed that way for like 14 years because I could address the problem and I have the solution and I stay connected because I don't want to be that person anymore. So I started my own transformation quite a while ago. And in this 12 step, I met a woman who was a speaker trainer and her husband became my client when I finally got a job and she said Patti, I'm doing a training for my speakers would you come and do the hair? And I said well yeah sure I'd love to and she goes my stylist as the element color typing system she knew I had experienced the seasonal color typing system a long time ago. So I had purple highlights my hair and I wore black and that's that's kind of jewel tones kind of how I looked all the time. So I went and her style of say pasty every one of the four elements air Fire Water and earth they have a shape from head to toe and you know the hair the neckline the shoes everything about that. And so she would tell me what they're all about wasn't I would trim you know cut their hair this way or give them a bang or layered or whatever she wanted me to do my God done. And my friend said hey, Patsy Bob so excited about what you do with her. She'll color type you in the elements if you want and I said look fine. I know I don't have a good I don't want to dress nice. She said Patsy you know what? You've been complaining to me a lot lately that things aren't going so well in your business. Wonderful you're wearing is stopping people from working with you. Wow. Like you'd be open to possibilities and a little vulnerable or I could keep struggling and I was struggling and trying to build my business. I said fine. I just don't want to be that fire. Well guess what? I was a fire which was the fall colors. I was not a happy camper. I had so many black clothes in my closet. I thought Don't you gotta be kidding. Anyway, she's supposed to let me explain what's different about this back in the 80s. And when they did that whole thing, we taught people what season of shopping and how to dress and how to look nice, great. And I knew how to do that. Then she said today, people are wanting to be more their authentic selves, they they're coming out of corporate, they're coming out of these other jobs, and they don't want to be in a box anymore. They have their own gifts and character traits, she says. So the element cover type of system is about your natural gifts, your natural character traits, your physical features, and then when we drape you in the right colors, and you light up, we see your essence. And she said, You are such a beautiful fire. And I started crying. There was a better with me. Anyway, she said, look, let's do this. Let's go shopping at a consignment store, buy a few tops. And if people don't treat you differently, you don't have to do this. I said fine. But every time I do one of those darn tops to work, my clients go, Hey, Pastor, you look pretty day. Or Hey, pass. You look really nice today. And pretty soon, about a week later, the salon owner came to me she was passing What are you doing differently? You look amazing. I said, change my tops. And I still had purple highlights in my hair. I had a really dark brown hair. And I said, she goes well, whatever you're doing. It's it looks great. I love okay. So I decided that would be really cool to add to my beauty business like you know, aligning that. So I started getting trained by the stylist. She got very ill. And I managed her business for two years. And six years ago, she sold me the business. So I think God has a sense of humor. I didn't even want to be typed in our LM the business. But that's how I met people like you start getting online doing that. But what was fascinating to me was this. Once I started wearing my colors in the new fire palette, and I'll show you what mine looks like, looks like this. So

Catharine O'Leary: it's a lot of so for those that are just listening, it looks like a lot of fall colors. Yeah. There's so there's Yeah, blues in there. Yeah. So it's not just about the seasons. It's really it's a it's a it's a far bigger palette. Yeah,

yeah, it is far bigger. So then people started wanting to work with me, people that I knew locally, people that was in network groups with now wanted to start working with me. And I found that fascinating. So I decided to manifest a makeover studio. So I had this little place where I could do their colors, do their hair, do their makeup. My clients tried to give me their nice gently used clothes because they didn't work in their closets anymore. I sold those I added some accessories. And it was the funnest thing ever. I did that for two years, then COVID close me down. And I thought now what am I supposed to do? God, I can't even I can't even work with people. So what I got was, what if I did this online? You know, we're doing the Hollywood Squares of networking. Why? What if I did that online. So I thought, okay, maybe I'll do a beta testing. So I put together a color typing fabric kit with little lip colors and stuff. And I got some women that wanted to do that. So found a great gal in Oregon, or one in Texas. And then I had a coach friend, which I love working with coaches who had a bunch of friends that want it done. So I did it all online. And I could color type every single one of it, then I would work with them and help them do their closet, take them shopping online, help them design their, you know, send them links to find the right stores that fit their essence and their style and their colors. It it was fabulous. Now, I have clients all over the world like you in Canada and in Paris and Portugal and South America, you know, England, it was it was a blessing to me. Now I can serve more people all over. And so it turned out to be a bigger thing. But when I started getting our Hollywood Squares, I noticed how many people didn't really know what to wear. Like, guys were wearing old T shirts and some older woman's never hadn't have their hair done in years. Like people didn't realize that now you are your brand. It's not your logo, your tagline. It's you. So that was the catalyst for me to start changing and doing that. So that was fascinating to me. And what I realized this Catherine is that I was hiding in plain sight wearing black. And that's why we're struggling in my business because people energetically couldn't connect with me like color has energy, but it's a silent influencer like we don't do anything without thinking about the color. Right? You don't paint a room you don't buy a bedspread you don't buy furniture like everything is around, you know a choice of color and it really is I think a lot of times subconscious. We don't really know. Yeah, but the whole thing with knowing what your color palette is it takes away the guesswork. You know how to shop where to shop, you have less clothes, and your budget and your wardrobe becomes an investment in you and your business. So when you walk out of your bedroom every day you got your hair down little lashes on some lip color and You're dressed to the nines, you can take on the world, you know that, right?

Catharine O'Leary: Yeah. So there's, there's so many golden nuggets in that one of the ones now that we are kind of post COVID. And we're through that travel bans and so on one of the things that since I've worked with you, and I've gotten my closets, you know, semi organized, and but now I like it is so much easier to pack for, especially for like just a, a weekend event. Like when it's a three day event, because I know, everything that I that you have helped me pick out essentially goes with each other. So I'm not, I'm not having to pack like three different outfits, I just have to pack a couple of different things. Because because a couple of things can make seven different outfits now instead of just, you know, three, because they all inter intertwine. And they all go together because the palette all goes together. And the textures all go together. And the designs all go together. You know, it's more than just like, Can I wear blue? Or can I wear black? It's also can I wear stripes? Or is it more waves and more circles or, you know, things of that nature, if there is a pattern involved, because anything I pick now, as long as I stick to those guidelines, like I don't have to have my whole closet be set, like with me to say, Oh, is this gonna go together? Whatever I pick is gonna go with everything else that I've just gotten. So, you know, being able to get rid of so many clothes that that maybe were once and then replace it with a third of the amount of clothes that you know, that all now interchange so much easier that I feel like I have a larger wardrobe with actually smaller amount of clothing. And I'm able to pack for, you know, for like, for events and so on, even if they're a week long events is just to carry on. Yeah, she's brilliant. I thought my element I was I was like, I don't know. Well, soda. And I,

you know, I think the first week we think about oh, we have to throw everything out of our wardrobe. And I can never wear that again and whatever. But when you start getting compliments everywhere you go, even the guy at the grocery store said to me, Hey, lady, you look nice. Today, I'm thinking How does he know? Like, you know, people do notice,

Catharine O'Leary: right? People notice and it's fun. So So one of the fun things that I've had to experience with with, you know, working with you is that I got typed to add an event. So we were at an event and you typed a few people. And we all went shopping together. And then it was so much fun because we ended up all the girls like that were water ended up in one change room because we were all like trying like all the different clothes on all because we were all the same type. And then there was like a fire room and an air room and an earth room. But there was also you know, one of my best friends. Shiraz was also typed. So he was getting sudden some new looks. And you know, like he still wears and I still see it. Like we'll go to an event and he'll be wearing one of the shirts you picked out for him. And people will compliment him and it's like, oh, Patsy, that's a patsy shirt. I remember that. That's a that's a patsy shirt, that's for sure. And he's like of course I only wear a patsy shirts now. Because people do notice and you do stand out more and the more that you stand out in a good way, the more confident you are, like even if it's just like somebody's coming up to you and saying, Wow, you know, like I'm not sure what happened or what you're doing differently but keep it up because it looks great. And what I found interesting and fascinating as you say is I ended up with a very kind of boxy almost but like a shimmery silver blazer that was almost like a silk fabric that I would never have purchased on my own ever, ever in my lifetime ever. When I purchased this and even trying on on I was like, I don't know. You know, you walk out of the change room and everyone goes, oh my god That looks so good. You have to buy that. You have to buy that if you don't buy that I'm going to buy it for you because that looks so good on you. It shouldn't work. It doesn't work on the rack, but on you it totally works.

And I've seen you wear that at the evening gala event that we went went to one time and it was stunning. And I know you've got compliments. So you know what I have one guy said to me, he said Pastor you said I'm a slow learner you said but I finally understood it isn't whether I liked the color or I liked the shirt. It's what how I looked in the shirt that made all the difference that people could connect with me. He said it's a subtle, but dramatic change. Right? So you don't think about that. But this is the this is the one store I'd love to share with you is that um, I have a one of the gals I met networking when I first started this whole thing, and she called me when she was passing, I'm starting to travel and speak and I'm so overbought well by my club, I don't even know what to wear anymore. And so being color typed or seen it being a water, I went to her house, we redid her, that's when I could be in person. And we went through her closet, and we put everything that didn't work on the bed. And there were a lot of things that still had tags on him brand new, right. And so after we got done with just sorting and putting outfits together that she had already that we could start with other things, then make and then we made a shopping list. We knew like, Okay, this is what we're looking for. I looked and I said, How much money do you think you have lying on the bed? She said 3k? Easy? Yes. How do you feel she goes, I feel so frustrated. I go to the you know, Macy's and different places they can buy the latest fashion, and then I don't wear it. And I don't know why, and are aware once and I never wear it again. And I don't get this. And I said but that's not unusual. The latest statistic is we only wear about 20% of the clothes in our closet. So I'm asking you guys, you know, think about that. What How much do you actually wear? And I said, but think about this. Now we have a shopping list. Now we know we're getting kneading, right? And I'm going to be sending you links. And we're going to do this together. Now how do you feel, she said, I feel so relieved. She said, I know now how to dress that aligns with me, I am looking forward to keep adding the pieces. So I always have confidence when I go someplace. So that was that was in the beginning. And I thought wow. So what I love is been able to help people understand when you invest in your wardrobe, you're investing in your business, right? And in your confidence, I don't care what they tell you, there's a lot of people that are not confident. So they just wear black, they just wear the same thing all the time. They don't want to mess with it. But they're struggling building their business or people aren't connect with them. And business is about connection. It's about that building that know like and trust factor. And this is what I've learned is if you look amazing, then people know that you care about yourself. And they know you'll care about their business. But if you don't, they can already make an assessment about you and three seconds thinking well, okay, but you know, like, they may not even want to hear what you have to say. So it's my heart to really be able to help especially, you know, startup entrepreneurs or people that are starting to speak and stuff, really understand that you are your brand. And you should easily feel confident and look amazing. And it shouldn't be hard. And it has been I understand most of my people hate to shop, because I look at national stores of clothes that you hate shop. And it's my genius, right? So I use, oh, where's my style? I don't like my body type. How do I dress it? Like where do I get that. And so I just send links, and we do it together. So it takes the guesswork out for you. And helps you it's a transformation. Like we've known each other for three years, and we're still working on your wardrobe. You're in Canada, I'm in America, so it's harder for us to connect LA Times. But I you know, I'm always thinking about you. And you know, I've picked you up stuff. Me that events, I've got something in my suitcase for you regardless because

Catharine O'Leary: it's I know your look, right? Yeah, it's absolutely true. Every once in a while, like, well, we'll hit an event together and it's like, Oh, I've got like three shirts for you. I'm thinking awesome. I actually now leave room in my carry on in case I see Patsy's so that I can like, you know, put my clothes in that she's gonna bring me because it's like Christmas, every time that I see you. It's, it's awesome. The other thing I really like is that you're not always on right you're not you don't always have to be like on stage you don't always have to be wearing these great big huge dynamic colors. You in these color palettes and in these, you know, in all these styles, there are also moods. And there's like you know, there's colors for when you just want to be chill and tranquil and what we were saying about colors with the furniture and the paint and everything like sometimes you paint like a bedroom to be really relaxing and tranquil and sometimes you want to wear that because you want to feel it but you also want the people around you to feel this. You don't always have to be in the big bright red something or you know, yellow something sometimes it's just like that chill hoodie that's in that pale yellow color. That's totally fine. You still look great in it. You still look confident in it, but you are giving off that mood, that vibe of being a little bit more tranquil and chill which is, you know, is as effective as anything else. Yeah.

And you know when you know you're going to be online, like you're going to be online and you're going to be the speaker, whatever you want to wear color that makes you maybe a foundation color because you're the expert like people know that when you come on you, you look professional. And you've got something to say, because people are programmed for you to have to look professional. But you do not have to wear black to look professional. That's the old corporate stuff. And we're breaking out of that, you can still wear a color in your palette that is fantastic. And still powerful without even knowing you know what color exactly to it. And then the dynamic like I have on today, which is a was a teal color, which everybody can wear. Teal and eggplant and dark green are all three colors that people can wear of the universal colors. This is more of a dynamic. I want you to remember me I want you to think mom, doesn't she look great. And that's what happens when you're online. If you look attractive, online, or onstage, people can't wait to hear what you have to say.

Catharine O'Leary: Yeah, because it says that five second rule, right like they they've made an assumption. Probably subconsciously. Yeah, five seconds so so you help people to break out of that you've helped me break out of that for sure. When I go on stage, I am always packing my Patsy clothes. You know, I do have a lot of wine and a lot of up to and so on and green. But I also have my own you know, the blues and the you know, the silvers are color for me. And no black. I'm not not allowed. I'm one of the types there's not a lot. In fact, there's only one type that it actually gets to wear black and that is fire. I think no, it's our Earth. Shiraz. Yes. When Black? Yes. But, but thank you, Patsy for coming on. Because I think that people need to understand that not only on Zoom, but as you're going out to networking events. And as you're going out to speaking events. And as you're building your business. If you if people start coming up to you and saying, Wow, you look great, or Wow, we're really like that, or like, you just feel more and more confidence. And, you know, we're still kind of coming out of the turtle shell of COVID a little bit and people are still figuring out with his new world vibe is going to be and you know, like he might as well feel as good as you know, like from the inside out, which is what I love about what you teach. So, and I thank you from from my own personal side of things, because you have helped me actually step into my own confidence as well. So I am a testimonial for you. And Patsy, I think that you have a free gift for us. So maybe you can tell us a little bit about that

I do I put together a PDF for you guys that's called on the stage. And there's like 10 or 12 tips of like how to, you know, to be able to go online and some tips and tricks. So you'll know how to show up better, right? Before you ever work with me. Or if you do at least help you understand, for instance, one is your glasses, if you weren't glasses, you know, you, you put up a little bit of an angle above your ear, and then they don't have a reflective on it when you're on Zoom. Right. So that helps a lot for people not to be distracted. You know, wearing a bold color, the big prints, people get distracted, you don't want to wear that like those little tips and tricks that can help you to be able to at least have an idea of like, oh, I don't do that. Or I could do this. So I'm hoping that that will benefit you in a way that as you're building your business. And, you know, to help you take it to the next level 2024 can be so amazing for you if you just take the time to think about working with me and taking it to the next level and you'll be at a higher vibration of confidence. Right? It just it happened. You can't help but feel good.

Catharine O'Leary: When you know you look good. And you know you look good. All right. Well, thank you the the free gift will be in the show notes, of course. Thank you so much Patsy for joining us today. I have enjoyed our conversation as always, I can't wait to see you again. See what you get for me. I think we're going shopping next time. So that's that's amazing. So we do that? Because I hate shopping unless I'm with Patsy. So thank you so much for joining us and for everyone else out there. Thank you for joining us as well. And just remember to stay curious in order to stay connected. Talk to you soon.