Waiting to Bloom | Kristi Collins

Deana Brown Mitchell: Hi, everybody, it's Deana at The Realize Foundation. And I'm back with another Arthur today. And I want to introduce you to Kristi Collins. And she is one of the authors, it's going to be coming in our second scars to stars book, which will be launched on September 22. So welcome, Kristi.

Hi. Thanks, Deana, for having me.

Deana Brown Mitchell: You're welcome. I'm so glad you're here. So as everybody watching these interviews knows that two questions for you. And one is, tell the audience a little bit about what your chapter is about.

Yes, so the title of my chapter is wildflower or waiting to bloom. And it's about finding hope in my infertility journey. And this was about three years ago. But my husband and I, we had a long struggle with infertility, and just walking that journey, and finding hope through that journey. And during the years of waiting, and kind of in the wilderness, and really just learning to rely on God, and strengthening our relationship with each other. And also learning that it's okay to ask for help. And because you struggle with infertility, it doesn't make you any less valuable, it we are all worthy and really accepting health help is a sign, you know, is a sign of strength, and also bravery. And I just had a really hard time acknowledging that I needed help at the start. And so that just that process of learning and growing to accept help and that it's okay. And then walking through my chapter really details out the different steps that we took in the process of the fertility journey, and then eventually having our daughter, so

Deana Brown Mitchell: So adorable.

Thank you, she is truly a joy and a gift from God. And, you know, it was worth everything we went through. So truly, it's quite, it was quite a process, but I don't regret doing any of it. And honestly, you have your baby, I had her and I kind of do forget all about it. So it was worth it all.

Deana Brown Mitchell: Yeah, that's true. I, I have some friends who have had babies, and they're like, I'm never doing this again. And then a year later, they're like I'm pregnant. And I'm like, did you forget the total?

Right? No, there's just something about it. So it's, it's where it was worth it all and kind of the Bible verse that we loved. I think it's in Psalm 27. I don't know the exact verse, but be strong, take heart and wait on the Lord. And so he knows the timing. We don't we don't always know why we suffer and why we walk through things. But we can trust him, even when our circumstances don't make sense.

Deana Brown Mitchell: That is true. I've had many, many experiences that prove that way. And part part of my journey has to do with some similar things that you've dealt with. And I'm actually going to record a video about my chapter today as well. So I'll talk more about that. But so Chrissy, my second question, is about your experience, writing your story and being part of this project and what, what came out of that for you and what was important, or healing or whatever, whatever feelings came up?

Yes. So writing for me is such an outlet of being able to communicate and understanding my own thoughts and being at being able to process my emotions. So writing, this whole chapter really helped me understand my journey and even process it and see even where God you know, sometimes where it didn't even see before where God was working in ways and in different ways in my life that I didn't see before comes to light when I write, and there is a lot of healing in the writing. And you find you find out more about yourself. And it's just such a blessing to be able to share and put everything onto a piece of paper that other people can read and find hope from and just gain encouragement from.

Deana Brown Mitchell: Yes, I agree. I think when I started several journeys, actually, you know, you feel like oh, well, I've went through this and it really sucked. And now I'm over it, and I've learned how to deal and maybe it can help somebody else. So I'm gonna write my story. And then through the process, you don't realize how much it's going to help you. You know what I mean? Because I went through that too, and I hear that from a lot of the people who've been involved In our project is like, I wanted to tell my story to help others, but it really helps me

100%. And that's so funny that you say that I was actually just thinking about that earlier today is that, you know, we, you know, I feel like God opens doors for us to help help others and encourage others. But in that process, he's also transforming us. And, you know, making us I don't know, stronger, and kind of just better, and in a way to be a light. But it's a beautiful process. And something else I actually forgot to mention too is that be in writing this makes you feel like you're a part of the community. So you're part of a community and your story, you know, that you're not alone, and struggles. There's other people going through different things, everybody has something they are going through, and these people or survivors and heroes, and just for them to be able to share that story is true bravery, and a willingness to give to others. But like you said, also healing for us as well.

Deana Brown Mitchell: Yeah, that's true. It while you're talking to me, we think about the name of scars. And why. Why we chose that, to be part of the name is because when you do go through something hard, like scar tissue is so much stronger than our regular skin. And so I think that speaks volumes to me. Because it's like when once you have been through something hard, you are stronger. And you are once you can heal from it and process it for yourself, then it's much easier for you to talk about and use it for good. And that's the whole purpose of what our mission is. And, and community is a really big part of that. You know, meeting people where they are and having them know, they're not alone, and that there's this community, and we have a private Facebook group, and we have live virtual events you can register for and stuff where you can connect with other people and breakouts or, you know, however, however you feel comfortable doing that. And it can really change everything.

100%

Deana Brown Mitchell: Yeah. Well, for me, specifically the reason community, and personal story and, and conversations are what we focus on, is because I was silent for 23 years about a suicide attempt. And the minute I talked to somebody who had been through a similar thing, it was like the whole world change for me, like I, you know, you've even though you kind of know, there are other people in the world who go through similar things. It's like, you don't really understand that anyone knows what you're going through until you talk to someone who's been through a similar journey. And it really does make a difference.

100%. And, you know, when you shared, I remember, I think it was 2020, right, during COVID, when you shared your story that really helped me feel like I could share my story. So you being vulnerable, and bringing that forward. Because, you know, allowed me to feel like I could share too, and say, hey, you know what, it's okay to be vulnerable. It's good to be vulnerable and real. None of us are perfect. We're all struggling with something. And there is healing and hope and help when we are vulnerable, and reach out to help other people. And that's how we heal. Like you said, that's part of the community. And I really think that's where God meets us too. And is when we're real, real real with him and with others. And that's when you can really start healing and peak and really work in your life. Because if you're not being honest, there's just not a lot that you could do. So it's this process of being learning to be vulnerable. And learning. That's really how I believe is how we help others. So thanks for inspiring all of us with that.

Deana Brown Mitchell: Well, thank you, I didn't feel like I ever wanted to talk about that. But I lost a friend. And probably a lot of people that are listening, maybe know that story. But I lost a friend suicide that I'd known for a long time. And it really made me feel like if if I had ever had if I had ever been open about it, or if I had ever had a conversation with him, where he knew what I had gone through, would he have reached out could I have made a difference. And that's the part that makes me continue on this journey because I don't ever want to be in a situation where someone I know dies by suicide and I didn't, you know, have a chance to talk to them or have them know at least what I know. And now you know, everybody in the world can read about my story and and I can't be I can't hide it anymore. So it's hopefully it is helpful and and I do think You know, I've even had some of the people in the book that write about business, even say, you know, I can write about business stuff all day, and I don't really get much feedback or whatever. But the minute I started talking about my struggles, then I have all the support. And I think it's the same and all of our stories, it's like, once we do share, it makes other people think it's okay. Just like you said,

Yeah. And just like you said, when when you reach out and open up, that's where, and I feel like the stakes are too high to not be vulnerable and share, right? Like you said, what if we could save a life? What if we could encourage someone that there's hope in this, their infertility journey, and I just feel like God has put that on my heart to be more vulnerable, and to share. And like you said, Your testimony is so powerful. And that is such a way to encourage people and bring hope and light to this world.

Deana Brown Mitchell: Thank you. And, you know, I knew you, I knew who you are those years you were going to that and I had no idea. So, you know, it's sometimes we have to get through some stuff for ourselves before we can talk about it, or we can be vulnerable, or we're, you know, tell her share our story. So thank you for thank you for doing that. And thank you for being part of this project, because I know it will help people.

Yep, thanks for letting me be a part of it. It's been truly a beautiful opportunity. So thank you.

Deana Brown Mitchell: Thank you, Kristi. So those of you watching this video, if you want to join us for our book launch on September 22, you can go to realize foundation.org Go to the events tab, and you can register for the book launch for September. And then we're gonna have another book launch in November. And we're also going to have a live event in October so you can register for any of those events on our website under the Events tab. And then we hope we can see you there. Thank you.