IRON DAD AND THE LIFE WE LIVE With Paul Weigel

Hello, it's Howard Brown. It's the Shining Brightly

Show. This is the Father's Day extravaganza. I have an amazing

guest, Paul Weigel. How are you, Paul?

I am great Howard, how are you? Happy Father's Day

Happy Father's Day to you as well. Oh my god, I'm

so happy. I have to tell you. We've sort of known about each

other. And then we got to meet out at the CoLo guard Golf

Classic back in Arizona for March colo rectal cancer

awareness month. And I just was amazed by Paul because he didn't

come alone. He brought his 12 year old daughter. She's 12.

Right?

She was 13 at the time. Yes. He's

13. Yeah, yeah. Okay. She's She's 13. And it was

just I was like, you know, you bring your daughter to this big

golf tournament, where there's advocacy going on. And the

golfers are playing in honour of patients and caregivers and

people that have passed. And it's just incredible. So I got

to sit down with Paul meet his daughter, get to know him a

little bit and then wanted to invite him to the show because

he's got some big things happening. So it's really,

really important that we get your message out and you've got

so many cool things happening that that I want to share with

my audience. And the first thing is, let me tell you just a

little bit more about Paul. So Paul Weigel is an author, a

keynote speaker, a spokesperson and communications consultant.

He is an 11 year cancer survivor, a six time Ironman

triathlete, and a dedicated Dad, that's the most important job of

course,

that's the most important job.

Political Science from the University of Puget

Sound. So he's an educated guy, right. So this is really great.

And the fact that we are both, you know, colorectal cancer

survivors makes it even more special to show the world that

it can be done now we both got knocked down really hard. Our

lives came to a screeching halt when he got those, you have

cancer diagnosis as well. So Paul, let me ask you a question.

How do you shine brightly each day?

Howard it's funny when you said what is most

important how I shine brightly every day, is my time I spent

with my daughter. As you mentioned me bringing her her

with me to the colour guard classic and seeing life through

her every single day. And getting a chance to see and

learn from her allows me to shine brightly a little bit more

exponentially every day, every single moment. So really,

anything associated with my kiddo allows me to shine

brightly.

I love that. And I have to be Pollack goes fast,

because, you know, my daughter was a freshman in high school

when I got diagnosed with stage three, and then a year later

metastatic stage four colon cancer. And it went fast. Right?

I didn't was not guaranteed that I see her graduate high school.

yet. I saw her graduate college. And she's actually started her

career as a TV reporter in Missoula, Montana. So I don't

get this year except I watch her on TV on the app a couple times

a week so that you know that that is the shining brightly

time. I love that. That's amazing. Why don't you share

just a little bit about you know who you are and your background

a little bit? Sure.

My name is Paul Weigel. As you mentioned, I am

an 11 year colon cancer, colorectal cancer survivor. I

when I was 43 years old, got diagnosed with a tumour about

the size of your fist at the junction of my rectum and my

colon. Like you I was originally diagnosed as a stage three colon

cancer. And very quickly went into treatment. You know, one of

the things for me, I was in my I was in my early 40s when I got

diagnosed, and I had had symptoms for years. And I talked

with my doctors, and my doctors hadn't totally paid attention to

it. In part because as you mentioned, I was an athlete, I

was doing all these other things that doctors would not assume

that I would be ill in any type of way. And yet I was getting

more and more incrementally sick. Now I'm 10 years later, or

now 11 years later. And as my daughter has gotten older, she

was three when I was originally diagnosed. And as she's gotten

older, she started asking some more questions about what that

time was like. What did it mean to be a patient back then? And I

was able to pull together this book and start I've been writing

this book called Iron dad. And it really has become this

wonderful A testament to her of how important she has been in my

life. And how great my life is now moving ahead 10 years later

with her apartment,

I It's an amazing story, the fact that she's taken

such an interest in your journey that way. And also, the fact is

the iron dad stands for a bunch of things. There's a lot of

symbolism in that, right. And so one of the things that you your

happy place happens to be triathlons. And so you've run

six, and you ran some before you're sick. And now you're

running after that's incredible as

well. But we're, you know, Howard, we're all

incredible. And that, and that may be part of the shining

brightly part. For me, when I had done my first Ironman

before, before I was sick, and before my daughter was born, but

when I did an Ironman triathlete six months after finishing

chemotherapy, and part of that was because we've talked about

the relationship with my kid, and with Natalie, that I wanted

her to see an experience that love and that passion for me,

too. And I've continued to do that. years later. And this

year, actually, as we're finishing this recording, I've

just finished to half Ironman, and then in October, I'm going

to be doing another full one. Because there we life is about

living and life is about taking it and pushing ourselves to new

limits. And so many of the lessons I learned while going

through treatment, have been lessons I've learned through

work, but if allowed me to continue and persevere through

things like the race, so I'm very lucky to for those who are

religious, I've been blessed. For those who are not I'm very

lucky.

Yeah, so it's funny, I say the same things. I

look in the mirror. My mantra is, I am blessed. I am grateful.

And I am lucky to be alive. Let's go help you. Today. Let's

go help people. Yes. So

we'll be going and helping people. Dan has been a

big part for me. As you know, I had written this book for my

daughter, ultimately. And it's only in January, I started

talking about does this story make sense to help make people's

lives better. And all of a sudden, people started saying,

this is a good message about fatherhood, and really helps

people think about being ill or taking care of their own health

in a different way. So each day for me has been tremendous as

I've gotten the chance to be able to talk about being a

survivor about having hard conversations with your doctor,

about being your own healthcare advocate. And that has been a

really neat exploration. Every day that I'm just lucky,

blessed, all those different things.

So it's, we have so many. We're aligned in so

many ways that so many parallels because we have daughters. And

also I have been playing basketball my whole life. And I

had to prove to myself that I actually played basketball

during treatment with a chemo port. not advisable. Okay,

doctor, so what are you doing? It could get pulled out, you'll

bleed out of the elbow right there, right? Just yeah, I would

protect I would cover it up with my hand. But again, I had to

prove to myself and I, we that's our happy place. And you have to

go to your stress free zone. And I tell everyone, I don't care if

it's meditation, or yoga, or cooking or travel or hiking,

find your happy place or art. And go there, schedule it in go

there often. And the fact that you and I both before and now

after living through what we have lived through, in as far as

you know, radiation, surgeries, treatment, and chemo and all the

side effects, and we're still doing it. That's cool, man, that

is really true as well. And I'm just so I'm so impressed, Paul,

that is just incredible. Now, I do want to shout out a little

bit. So Paul and I, we've decided that because we're so

blessed and grateful to be alive. We take time and we

actually I'll give shout outs now. So we both have done great

volunteer champion work with the Colorectal Cancer Alliance.

You've done a little more work with fight CRC than I have but

great organisation, they plant flags on the Capitol and they're

big into grants and research and advocacy at the government level

and then also Man Up To Cancer This is really cool place is

incredible. It's it's all psychosocial help for men

because men tend to isolate men don't get screened men are

tough. We're macho, right? This is an amazing growing community

of really caring guys that I've got your back and some of them

are like Paul and I that are five steps ahead on our healing

journey. Others are just starting out and got the bad

news of having cancer and I found it to be a very cool place

and in Arizona at the colocar classic got to meet in person

like 2025 Guy It was really quite incredible. So shout out

to there for that as well. What I want you to talk about though,

is is the book because you actually in talking to your

daughter, and explaining to her kind of what's going on there.

So give me the you know, it's kind of the genesis of the book

and, and it's coming out soon, in a couple of weeks. So I think

we're at mid June. So talk about this.

The book has been really an 11 year really an 11

year labour of love, right? That, well, I was going through

treatment being diagnosed at the advanced stage, I was I mean, it

was stage three, and that there were some signs that I might be

a stage four patient, and that I was incredibly concerned that I

was not going to be around very long. And so as I was going

through my treatment, I actually wrote a blog. And that blog guy

showed all my different experiences, my time, my time

how I felt, when I was dealing with at work, while I was

dealing with side effects, trying to balance out driving,

we lived in Seattle at the time driving into work working part

of the day, then driving across the city to get radiation and

chemo, then driving back home to try and be a dad. And so it

started with this blog. And then, you know, being a cancer

patient, as you know, Eric is hard. And and to have that

ongoing conversation for so long was was overwhelming for me. So

what I did was I actually I took this blog I had and I packaged

it up, I certainly had it printed out. But I took my

digital copy. And I put it all on a shelf. And I was like, I'm

not dealing with this for a long time, until I'm really ready to

tell my story. And then as Natalie has gotten older, and as

some of these things that they continue to explore on, on on my

test finally were cleared. And I was finally given my no evidence

of disease card. I call it my no cancer card. Nine years later,

that I felt that I was in a position that I could really

tell the story. And, and so ultimately what I did was I took

this blog and I started saying, now how can I explain to Natalie

some of this time, and as I started writing it, I realised

that I took a step back and started explaining how important

she was to me in my life. And and some of the trials and

tribulations I had before she was born. And then the fact that

once she was born, I had something to live for. And when

we were going when I was going through treatment, I found it. I

thought so many times to myself, if I had been diagnosed just

three or four years before before she was born. I don't

know how much I would have had to fight for. But that all the

sudden I really had her to fight for that was an inspiration that

helped me to shine brightly to help me have hope and to feel

like I had something to go for. And the book continued to evolve

into what's become iron dad, as you said is a complex answer. It

talks about being Yes, being an Ironman triathlete, but it also

talks about the perseverance of getting through life every day

as a parent and, and doing the different things that we need to

be engaged for our daughters, whether you are watching your

daughter on on a download, or whether I'm watching my daughter

during her middle school graduation. So the book has

really become it started as a blog 10 years ago, it's evolved

as Natalie started asking questions, and then has really

morphed into a story that hopefully is inspirational for

others. That's we're dealing with the issues of colon cancer

now. That was one of the things that has been fascinating to me

in the last few years. You know, when I got diagnosed 10 years

ago, we didn't talk about colon cancer, we didn't have many of

the things that were was going on. And in spite of the fact

that we've made so much progress and colon cancer awareness or in

discussions with doctors, we are still so far behind in terms of

what we need to do to make sure doctors and patients are aware.

So I'm wanting to really to be able to help share our stories

so that people are having those conversations with those doctors

and are being more aware of what's going on with their body.

I want to stop right there. Pause for a second

because first of all the people that are on video will see that

and when they see a copy of your book you have you're holding

your daughter's hand and a heart on top of the iron dad. And yes,

this is why This is such an important Father's Day issue,

because relationships, okay dads with their children, dads with

their spouses, significant others family members, but when

you get this cancer diagnosis, emotionally, physically,

sometimes financially, your career and in relationships,

that all gets thrown into a blender sometimes. And I will

tell you this at over 153,000 in the US who will be diagnosed,

maybe 2.2 million worldwide. Okay, a third of those patients

will actually die this year from colorectal cancer. It's the

number one killer for men. Number two, killer for women

under the age of 50. This isn't an old man's disease, grandma

and grandpa's disease anymore. And so, the one thing that I do

you see me walking around with my blue sneakers, and I'm always

wearing blue, I have a blue shirt on today. But I actually

what I do is I want people to get screened, and you do too,

right, don't get this disease don't get it? Well,

and that's the part that getting screened is is so

easy, and especially when we're looking at, I had symptoms for

five years before I got diagnosed. And I've even talked

with my doctor. And if we had just done some of those

preliminary evaluations, that helmet that we would have found,

like cancer when it was an early stage or even a polyp. And that

I wouldn't have had to go through all this. But there's

still so many people all the time that they're they have

symptoms, and if they don't end and talk to the doctor, their

lives will be saved. So absolutely the more chances we

get for people to think about getting screened, the better.

Well, I mean, if I would have been screened at 40,

we might have not met Paul, but we'll shout out to the coast

guard and exact science folks. So you can poop in a cup and

send it to the lab and then write your tests positive you do

go get a coal colonoscopy, the gold standard snip a polyp and

then you know move on with your life hopefully and not have to

go through the stuff that we've gone through. The next is that

there's going to be over 100,000 in the US in treatment. And you

and I know what that is feeling like so we have the advocacy

organs, and especially colon town as well that walk hand in

hand with 10 is a great group, with the coat with the

caregivers and to be able to have the information to be able

to make decisions. It's a complex thing. And you hear all

these ABC soups of names and acronyms. You got to learn it.

And you got to be a smart patient, smart patients

collaborate with their care teams and their oncologist and

their surgeons to make the best decisions in front of them. And

then lastly, oh, you you mentioned

all of these different groups, whether it's

colon town, or fight CRC, or the CCA or a Man Up To Cancer. That

was something that wasn't around 10 years ago, but I really felt

that I was going through my battle alone. But yes, there

were a couple of small groups in the Seattle area. And they they

were like 10 people and to really have big deep

conversations, especially men trying to talk through what does

it mean to be going through this treatment just wasn't there. And

I felt alone on an island so much of the time going through.

I think that's probably part of the reason I had my blog was I

was trying to get out there and say, This is what this

experience is like, I'm sorry, I interrupted No, no, no, I

was just all good. No, no, this, this is a free

front free format, you know, show so we can talk over each

other. But the last thing is, is that that there's people that

are going to die from this disease, right? And so I always

memorialise when their cancer burden is too great. And they

get called to heaven. You just don't know when that time is up.

So you have to be able to get back up again. And that's the

beautiful thing, Paul, that we prove every day that we can get

out of bed, we can actually live real productive lives be loving

dads, and husbands and family members and be able to be

productive, but also show you what can happen. Okay, it's not

it doesn't happen for everybody and we don't take it for granted

for sure. And so what I wanted to ask you was that you know, in

your book I mean you're basically living your life now

what does Father's Day mean to you and I'll tell you what it

means to me as well.

Eric, you know, every day is Father's Day

I just feel absolutely so lucky every single day to see Natalie

do more and explore and, and, and yes, she is a teenager now

and she can be a total pain. But at the same point I have to note

that I'm around and that I get to see life through her eyes.

One of the things you mentioned a little bit ago of like being

thrown into a blender of my since I was diagnosed my career

change dramatically. I've chosen to pretty much stay at home

working In jobs, so I can see her every single day that I

would, I was the dad who walked her to school and dropped her

off at the door and picked her up or would go on all those

different field trips. So that I want to have every single

experience, in spite of the chaotic world that I've now been

forever immersed into.

I love it. So I Father's Day to me is a wait,

it's one day out of the whole year, and I am with you father's

days every day, right. And I just think it's a way to show

appreciation back to for, you know, being loved

unconditionally, showing a legacy showing what is possible.

You know, it's just, it's important. I want my daughter to

know that, that she was part of the reason that and as you said,

that we that were alive today is that wanting to see them. And

so, you know, I want to see your graduate high school, I want to

see your Graduate University of Michigan, she did, and I put it

out there, when at the right time, I will walk her down the

aisle because life's about making memories. Now. Those are

the important things in life and all that. So it's just so so

important that we do that. And for all the dads out there, this

is your day, sit back, have a cold one, have a hot dog or a

burger. But remember every day is Father's Day and fatherhood.

And is really important. Stable fatherhood matters. And we if

you need help with that, we Paul and I can give you a good

direction. And you don't have to have cancer to be a good dad.

That's for sure.

That is for sure. Well, you know, we, you have

your story of when you were told you had cancer and and when you

heard those words, and I have the same thing for me that when

the doctor told me that I had a tumour, my first thoughts were

all those different things I was not going to see Natalie do what

was like, even going to see her start school, let alone go to

prom or get married or have her first job. And and so it was an

apocalyptic moment to be thinking through. Not what was

not what was I going to miss outside of that, but to see

through her. And so that she has been a wonderful source of

inspiration to me. As we've gone through the last 10 plus years.

I

want to tell you how excited I am for you. Okay,

cherish this moment, you have a will be a published author and

have a book coming out in a couple of weeks, mid June,

right? You started your own podcast, you have your own

platform, you're spreading your advocacy and your message out

there. You're speaking on stages, right? You're a

communications expert. This is this is really a beautiful time.

And I just want to tell you how much I appreciate you sharing

that with everyone to show you that you did get back up again,

you are like me, I'm Humpty Dumpty version three, oh, you're

putting your pieces back together again, but you're

lifting up others and that's what my whole show is, and my

whole shining brighten the movement as well. So I just want

you to take in a deep breath and appreciate this what you're

doing. And it matters, I'm just telling you, it really matters

and, and you and I will help promote each other and, and

share that with it. But I'm very proud of you. It does this is

not easy to be published and to get out there and to share your

voice and your you are a role model for Natalie, but also for

others, and including others that are in the journey of going

through cancer right now to thank you so bad.

I was just gonna say just the you do this, we

both do this. This is a labour of love. And Ben, I know we're

gonna put on our sunglasses here in a second. But we are the FET

but the we are spending a huge amount of time and energy,

trying to help make lives better, and to help people

thinking that there is the power of positivity and there is hope

and there is you can dream and and have a wonderful future and

a wonderful life. And I'm just so happy to be here with you

today. So

right and so let's put on our glasses because it's

the shining bright the spotlight it is the shining bright. The

answer is that it's a team sport. Life is a team sport.

Fighting cancer is a team sport. It's a team sport, and we're a

team. So all the shining brightly spotlight is on you.

Okay, I want to tell people how they should best get a hold of

you. And then share some final inspiration and kick the show

back to me for a close.

All right. To find out more about my book or any of

the things I'm working on just go to www.on Your dad book.com

You'll find different resources there as you mentioned, our

podcasts as well as contact resources for how to get in

touch with me. So thank you my parting words for everybody in

anybody is not only shine bright, but fight like hell. I

mean, be your biggest advocate live your life to the absolute

fullest. That's So what i You mentioned being being an Ironman

triathlete, that's what I'm trying to do every day is push

the edge of that envelope. So that when I'm looking back on my

life, hopefully in 50 years, that my last moments are just of

wonderful, tremendous experiences. I

love it. And I will tell you this for those who

don't know what an Ironman is, you're swimming a mile, maybe

two or and then you're biking. 20 112 112 And then you're doing

a full marathon after that. That is out. I listen, I go two hours

in the basketball court. Paul, that is incredible. You are iron

dad. And I am so happier here. So shining brightly this show is

every Wednesday, you can find me at shining brightly.com and

plenty of information about my book. Also, thank you, Paul.

I've endorsed your book, and I can't wait for it to come out.

And also my speaking if you want me to speak to your and put on a

great show motivational speaker and teach a little bit too. And

then also, my advocacy. My advocacy is so important. And

Paul and I share this cancer advocacy for screening in

treatment and survivorship is everything to us as well. I also

mentor entrepreneurs and then my interfaith work is vital because

we live in a planet where we're all not the same. And I tell

everyone to choose not to hate. And so those are my three kind

of lanes that I play and so find me at shining brightly.com This

has been an incredible show. Paul, you are just a friend and

truly an inspiration. And just remember if we choose and we do

to shine brightly, just a little bit each day for ourselves, go

lift up others in our communities in our

neighbourhoods, yes, the world would be a better place. Again,

Paul, thank you. You've been outstanding. I can't wait for

your book and to check out your show.

Thank you, Howard. Appreciate your time. You are

too