Embracing Vulnerability and Authenticity for Success

But how have you seen that going away from your head, really tapping into your heart has helped your business flourish.

I mean, I feel like I get to create it from me. Instead of the version of me, I thought people wanted me to be.

Welcome to the ReLaunch podcast and this interview, this guest has been a long time coming. And it is someone that I personally am so excited to dive deep to go into those relaunches that truly shape us that shaped her into new careers, new success, new love relationships. And the person I'm talking about is Marley Jaxx, she's an award winning filmmaker, and globally recognized expert in video creation, YouTube growth, and content strategy. She is the go to consultant for top industry leaders and you will hear it is the this is like no doubt, really important these days in who you're working with how you're working with, do those people bring you up, elevate you along the way, her creative expertise transforms brands into icons and entrepreneurs into successful empire builders key right there too. If we're gonna go, we're gonna go big, and that is what this is all about. And at this point, she's really helping people convert their influence into currency, the big am money. Marley is here to help us all be more successful, let's get out of our own way. Her resilience is evident in her move from Canada to America in the middle of the pandemic. And let me just say, and this is something that we're gonna get into, it was all during a divorce. She's also unfortunately in the same club I am, she's had cancer. But here's the thing, the relaunches have truly defined this incredibly beautiful person on the outside and the inside. And so today, I want to welcome Marilee Jax to the relaunch show. And have you Marley explained that most significant and I know there are a lot the most significant relaunch if there really, truly can be. And maybe there's, it's like a tapestry. Maybe everything is interwoven. But let's start at the point where you really defined yourself in terms of your resilience and your relaunch.

Thanks for having me. First of all, it's like we've been hearing about each other in our circles for so long. So I'm so glad to finally be speaking. And this topic is one that I love to talk about. Because I have often said and, and thought and written about that the hardest times in my life, were the most magical, like the times where I was just dragging my face against the pavement. Trudging through the mud. They were so impossibly painful at the time, there were times where I was near suicidal because of how hard things were. But now, you know, you can connect the dots looking backwards. They were the best things to ever happen to me.

You know what I'm even going to say this. A lot of times I asked either on the show, or after the show, we talk about these relaunches and if you could go back and change anything, would you? Yeah.

Do you want the resilience? Or do you want? It's great. Yeah, I will experience that again. 10 times over to continue to have what I have today. irreplaceable. And in you know

what, again, 250 plus guests on the show. Not one has ever said oh my god, oh my God. Let me let me change that up. You are who you are today. This incredibly dynamic woman, successful woman you know, wonderfully you know, in a involved in a relationship of and we talked before the show that you are where you are because of that path because of the hardships but we need to understand what was the relaunched journey that you went through?

Well, I mean, you kind of brushed over some of the things I would say 2020 which was a real launch for a lot of people that when the world fell apart, and we had to find a new normal and then get back to normal. The New Normal again, I was going through divorce, I did not feel comfortable. In my hometown where where I had my marriage. And so I moved to America and it's funny. I mean, I made up papers. So that said that I was an essential worker to go to America in the middle of the pandemic, while we still had no idea what was going on. And the most interesting part, and this has become such a framework for my life, I went to Omaha, to be with a guy that I was in a brand new relationship with, which certainly looking back was definitely a rebound. But back then it's like, no, I'm healed, I already did the hardest part of leaving my marriage. And I actually verbally said, I will never be heartbroken again. Because I really believed that leaving the marriage was the hardest thing, and that I'd done all the work and that I don't even know for a lot a lot of times for women during a breakup, the their, their grieving during the breakup, that by the time it's over, it's like really over. But I really had no idea how,

how long were you married? We

were together for six years married for three. And

you said it was during the pandemic that you decided to make that decision that not just I'm going to get divorced, but I'm going to move to to the United States. But what really caused you because I think there's a lot of women out there that are having tough relationships. And there's that moment of like, when do you know, you're really done? When do you know that it's over.

And now looking back, it seems like it was one of those things that it was a long time coming. I another relaunch. I was a dental hygienist when we got married, which is very different than what I do today. That's still

when you say It still blows my mind. I right where you are today, you talk about that journey. And I get a lot of corporate women coming on and that that I haven't had I haven't had a dental hygienist. So this is an awesome story. So here you are cleaning people's teeth in there. You know, there's not a lot of talking when you're doing that. And, and so was it what was it the you were dissatisfied with the job? With the marriage, I mean, what came first, it's like the chicken or the egg, which one which one really started the process. It

was the job first I was I mean, I growing up, Mike, my dream was to make movies in Hollywood. And I'm a very creative person. Even before that I worked in event management, I worked in radio and television, so I was very much in creative businesses. But in those industries, it was very, very ego driven, and not the nicest people to be around. So when I kind of had enough of that had my heart broken enough there went back to dental as my fallback plan, let me figure out what I really want to be when I grow up after spending some time in dental, which didn't take long to get bored. Because I mean, like you said, you have your hands in someone's mouth. It's a one way conversation. It's repetitive. You're not very creative at all. And so I started this little side business as a social media manager, which I didn't know at the time was going to be a big trigger for my divorce. Because I think that when we got married, I was a dental hygienist. And that was the lifestyle he signed up for. And then I changed. I wanted to run a business, I wanted to travel and do speaking engagements and be very social with that business, which was not what he wanted, and at times was very threatening, and I was the one that changed. And so as a result that led to the big dismantling of So

how long were you doing social media, when all of a sudden you're like, Listen, this is what I really want to do. That you decided to say, we're done.

I mean, so the the I started the social media business around the time we got married, so we'd been together for three years, got married, and then three years later got the divorce. But it was in the time that I was like slowly leaving dental and building my business more that red flags started to come up of him not agreeing with it not really wanting this direction of life. And it just got to the place at the end of the marriage where it was just very clear that the more that I wanted to grow the business and travel and explore my ambitions. It was just it was constant butting heads over just different desires for lifestyle and unfortunately at the time, we were not mature enough to be able to do the conscious uncoupling it you know, when you feel threatened over losing what you thought was your life. It just it came out very unfortunately, you know, lots of lots of fighting. So do you think

people that are listening right now where relationships have dramatically changed right since COVID? In the sense that many people are working from home you see your you know, partner or your boyfriend or your husband Little bit more than you would have when people were going off to offices and doing their things. And there is this moment of truth. And I want to make sure everyone knows that social media is not going to lead to divorce. Or if you're, we need to make sure that there is the delineation of this is so incredible where we're going with this. And how you can doesn't matter what it is, that is your passion, going full force is something that you have to be willing and I did this with my own life with my first husband, I was married for almost 13 years. And you realize that, at some point, you gotta go for your dreams. And you have said many times that I have heard that you finally are in this place where it is, you know, it's not the decoupling, it's not that conscious. It's the, it's the being present in where you are. And I'd love to ask you, as you were moving to the US, and you said that there is, you know, guy, and can you walk us through how the evolution happened, because you do think I'm good, I'm good. I've dealt with it, I got the divorce, that was so hard. My wounds are healed. My column, you know, limiting beliefs, the bugs, the beliefs, underground, surfacing, they're gone, don't have many more, but they always seem to creep up again. So what happened? What happened with you?

So I went to Omaha, to go be in a new relationship. And I had this all built up in my mind of He is everything my ex husband wasn't, and this is my love story, and my happily ever after. And it lasted one week. And one week,

and you're in Omaha. Yeah.

And like I packed up everything that I could into two suitcases thinking, this is you know, you do crazy things when you're in love, and definitely was doing crazy things. And I went with this big expectation because in our long distance relationship, because it's kind of a new relationship. He had said things of like, I can see us being together, I could see this, you know, leading to marriage and I want to be with you. Let's just be crazy. Why don't you come here? Let's move in. And let's start a life together. And about a weekend after meeting his friends, his family is, you know, colleagues is his employees and stuff. I said, Hey, why don't you ever introduce me as your girlfriend? And he goes, Well, I don't want to put a label on it. I don't want to move too fast. And I'm like,

moved here. So

I packed up everything. And I was like, that doesn't work for me. But and I went to Boise, where I live now. Because my best friend lives in Boise. And she said, Just come here. I and she had been asking me the whole time during the pandemic to come move, move in with her. And just so that we could be together during the pandemic, I wouldn't be alone up in Canada. And I just kept saying no, because I didn't want to impose. But how perfect that going through Omaha is what really brought me to Boise. But when I arrived, I I and my friend that I my best friend that I lived with said when you arrived you were unrecognizable. Like I did not know that girl I was so heartbroken. I really internalized his emotional unavailability is a reflection of my self worth, I thought what is wrong with me, I had that expectation that I would never be heartbroken again. I thought I already did the hardest thing. And here, I took a huge leap to go be with him with this expectation that I was going to have my fairy tale. And I felt so rejected. And I really naively thought that he was going to turn around and go I made a huge mistake I can't live without you come back. And he sure didn't. And that led to tons of therapy, which then allowed me to see all the other limiting beliefs, the baggage that I was holding that I had no idea. And so now I love being able to say thank you Omaha because if it wasn't for Omaha, I wouldn't have come to Boise I wouldn't have gone through all that therapy and that therapy is what led me to find the man that I'm with now who before I would have said and I did say when he started to pursue me he wasn't my type because my type was narcissist manipulator cheater abuser. So now whenever something great guys Yeah, you know what? Why can't you just like be a little rude to me, not me around a little bit. That's terrible. But I now if I ever have something in my life that doesn't seem like it's going according to plan. I think maybe it's just Omaha. Maybe it's just the thing that I hadn't high expectation for and when it didn't work out the next best thing that was unimaginable to me at the time was right behind it.

Oh my god, I love maybe it's just Omaha, just Omaha. That is the best line. And each and every one of us should have a line like, yeah.

What's your theme? That was the the huge disappointment that lead to the biggest breakthrough of your life. Yeah.

And a lot of times and Marley, I'm sure that you can agree and we can go into your health scare and your issues around there. But there's always that moment I call it the the relaunch flip where your story ties to something in the past that is keeping you kind of contained. It's keeping you out of lower vibrational energy. And as soon as you can flip that story, and start to say, hey, you know what, maybe it's just Omaha, all of a sudden, it gives you a freedom. And there's such a freedom there. Because you know, you've gotten through, you know, that you have survived and thrived. And it's such a powerful phrase. So I want each and every person to really think about it, and say, maybe it's just and then dot dot dot, what would it be? What would that be? Okay, so tell us about your health. Tell us? What happened there.

Yeah, I, of course, didn't see that coming. I thought that the scary diagnosis, stuff that happened that happens to other people that happens in the movies, that happens to people that are unhealthy, that would never happen to me. So I went for my regular, you know, female, physical, and they said, hey, something looks a little strange. Why don't you come back in six months? We'll do check it out. Again, I go back in six months, do the you know the PAP again, and still looks a little abnormal? Why don't you come in and we'll do they call it ECC, which is like a little deeper of a pap. So I had that. And while they were in there, which you know, ladies listening, you know, it's the most uncomfortable, most fun position to be in.

Horrible, and I have what you had done done. And that's even more painful.

No thing, like trauma right there. And both of us. So they're like, you know, so we're seeing something, we're just going to do a little biopsy just right here, which I was not prepared, not emotionally physically prepared for gosh. So they did you know, which is not uncomfortable, especially ladies are probably listening, this are probably cringing, crossing your legs right now. And then they call back saying hey, there's just this, I can't remember what the the word for it was. But they said we're going to do something called a leap procedure, which is where they kind of just scrape off with an electric loop kind of thing, where there's some abnormal cells, we're just going to remove it after that, it'll be totally fine. This is a normal procedure. Well, they did that and I'm so glad my boyfriend came with me to hold my hand for the very it was traumatic. And then after that was like, it was all done. No problem. You're fine. This you know, see you in a year for your next path, whatever. But I got a call a couple weeks later, which happened to be two days before Christmas. And I thought that it was just a checkup call of hey, how are things going since the procedure but she said hey, we we didn't see this coming. This isn't very common actually only happens to one in 100,000 women. So there we go. There's me getting a badge to label on me that this Oh, I'm rare. I'm special that you have cervical adenocarcinoma. And we're gonna you know, go have Christmas with your family. But we're going to book you in as soon as our office opens after Christmas and we need to discuss you getting a hysterectomy right away. And I just in that moment completely froze blank. I don't remember what happened next turn my phone on speaker gave it to Stephen and I was like,

How old were you when you heard this?

I was 31. Yeah, and it was just checked out. That doesn't happen. To me that happens to people in the movies. No. Yeah. Yeah. And then, um, I think I was kind of in a in a daze for a little while that I didn't really know what that meant. I knew what it meant logically, but I just felt so surreal. And so after Christmas, went back to the doctor, and funny, you know, you see the little the triage nurse that takes her vitals and stuff and her bedside manner was not that great. Oh, your Christmas must have been so hard. Oh, so terrible to get such news right before shriveling. And I'm like, what why? What do you mean? Like why I'm still in a daze. Ah, and then we you know, talked about it again and the doctor said you need to get a hysterectomy so this doesn't progress. So into worse cancer and you know, with this with a hysterectomy and you take like, six to 12 weeks off for recovery. And, you know, as entrepreneurs, we got like campaigns scheduled. So I'm like, What? What am I going to take off? 12 weeks? So conveniently, and this is another, maybe it's just Omaha moment. I scheduled it for a couple months, I was like, do I have some time? Well, we got to move fast to keep we can't, as soon as possible. Luckily, I scheduled it with some time that gave me time to breathe and time to think because after I shared it publicly, which felt terrifying to do, like, I want my content to be happy, and Instagram filter, you know, like, the stuff that we all want to celebrate not. I am traumatized and don't know what this means for my future. And I don't know how I feel. And I need help. But I don't know how to ask for it. I'm so grateful that I did share that.

Because you Why did you decide to share it?

I needed help. And I needed and it's so funny because I talked to a friend saying, because when people are loving, amazing, well, meaning people reach out with love and attention and suggestions and support. There was part of me and I told my friend this that I felt guilty for receiving that I felt guilty for the attention to be on me. Because this isn't the kind of attention I want. I would rather have the attention of like, my business just made a million dollars not I have cancer. And I don't know how to cope right now. Can someone help me? And yeah, it was it was a really how

powerful that you did that and you shared with people that time of vulnerability. You said it was a couple of months before

I shared it less than a month later.

And then how long before you had the surgery? I didn't? You didn't know. So okay, can now I'm even more intrigued. Okay, so what happened? What happened here?

So I, when I shared this and the thing about like, we know, as entrepreneurs, when you create content on the internet, you never know who's listening, that's gonna just be so inspired by what you have to say. But you also never know who's out there. That could be an answer that you need. Because here, I'm like, I'm 31 years old. What if I want to help get pregnant? What it how is this going to change my body, hormonally sexually skeletally like all the things that are unknown after having such a prominent surgery. So I'm so grateful, because when I made that post, of course, I got flooded with love, ideas, suggestions, and some that really spoke through were a friend of mine who has a book called crispy cancer, he had a story that he had stage three B colon cancer, and he healed it naturally. And then I also had a friend that's a functional medicine doctor that she said, Hey, before you have the surgery, can we do some tests, you know, and if you do decide to have the surgery, I will support you in that. But let's just also see what else is going on in the body. And I was so grateful, especially to those two people. My functional medicine doctor, Dr. Kelly Shockley, and Chris work, because Chris on the phone to me said number one, you have time, which I didn't feel from the doctor saying we have to have the surgery right right away. It's a ticking time bomb. And he also reminded, taught me because here I am thinking I have the kind of cancer that only one and 100,000 women have. It's different, it's special. It's rare, I'm doomed. Instead, he was like, I don't care, what type it is, where let what location, what stage, the healing mechanism is the same. And then Pair that with a functional medicine doctor that did these tests with me to show me the actual the cause of the cancer instead of just the symptom instead of just God,

that is so good, right? Because these are all symptoms,

right? What I didn't feel them, it's just what this what this doctor is telling me I didn't feel sick or anything. I just got this news that is going to change my life. If we would have gone through with the surgery, it could have been like painting over a water leak. If we don't know what causes the cancer and don't heal that. How do we know that this isn't just going to move to a different area of my body or the same issue is going to show up somewhere else like if the body has created an environment for cancer to form. Can we just reverse that to create an environment for healing? How is a hurricane formed in the perfect conditions? How does a hurricane Go away in the perfect conditions.

So this is amazing because you know, I have not heard this, obviously, this is the first time I'm hearing about this. And I had to make a decision about a year ago to have a full hysterectomy. Or not. And I did, I did a lot of research. And I too asked a tremendous amount of people. And I chose not to do it as well. For different reasons than you. But it was, it was a decision that I really felt like it was right even though the doctors just saying no, you should do this, you should do this. So I am absolutely on pins and needles right now I need to understand what happened during this process. Yeah,

there was definitely a lot of I mean, emotional turmoil in what do I do? Am I doing the right thing? And of course opinions from all sides of yes, this is the way to go. And some people do that, like you're gonna die. What are you thinking? Don't you care about like your life and your family and all the things all the the well meaning, judgments and concerns. And so when I did the tests with this functional medicine doctor who I will work with her for the rest of my life, because if you're not testing, you're guessing how do you know what's actually going on? Like, we might feel okay. Nobody

should be saying that with everything in life. If you're not testing, you're guessing. Let's just like coin that right now. For you. Okay. A great.

How would I make business decisions? If I don't have the data? Why would I make decisions over something so permanent? My health without having the data. And so from these tests, what we found was, I had a lot of heavy metals built up in my body. And when there's heavy metals that come from just our environment, our water, oh, my gosh, don't get me started on what is in our water. Like, if you go to ewg.org, look up the tap tap water database put in your zip code, you will be horrified and offended and infuriated to see what is in our regular tap water

bill. W g.org. Yes,

run, don't walk and buy a water filter and never looked back like it is. There's arsenic in our water. There's chloroform in our water, like do you do you think that even just a little, a little amount is okay, absolutely not. And then when you start to discover, like, what's in our food, what's in our shampoo, what's in all these things. And it's all around us. And it doesn't, I am certainly not perfect, I have made improvements. There are some things that I'm like, You know what I'm still going to put nail polish on. But I'm going to do some other things in my life a little bit differently. I'm, I'm going to do my best to continue to remove the toxins. So you

found out that you have heavy metals in your body at a very high level. And that you when

when there's heavy metals, your immune system is distracted, because it's fighting the heavy metals

you took when you stopped and you started to really look at this heavy metals in your body. And you went back in and God casts what happened.

So then we went on a protocol to supplement the healthy things that I needed for my for my training, I almost had a thing around me my supplements, but I have a customized protocol, the supplements I take to optimize any nutrient deficiencies, and also supplements that are going to detox my body. So there's these chelating agents, there's I mean sauna even to sweat out the toxins. Also, I was on birth control for 16 years, what that does to a woman and now I'm a huge advocate for not being on birth control. Gosh, it's like it when I when you discover this, it's also one of the things that I can get on a soapbox and become infuriated about that. Especially oh my gosh, I was talking to a doctor that she she has heard of kids like six years old that are being put on birth control so they can skip the bleed. Like they that what is what is going to happen to that child that will never have regulated hormones when they grow old or they will never have a libido and be able to understand because when you are on birth control, it shuts off the communication between your ovaries and your brain. And that having a menstrual cycle is a very healthy natural thing, and is a superpower for women when they really can understand their cycle. So I also had to heal from 16 years of being on birth control. And when I got off of it, oh my gosh, it was like I was in this emotional tornado of the crazies. Oh my gosh, I was like what's wrong with me? Well, it's my body communicating with my ovaries again, and this is actually mostly normal until you have

so Marley What have the tests come back? Like right now?

Yes. So the tests come back. And so I do these tests every 90 days, which is amazing to have that data because normally if I would have gone for it and I I've, unfortunately had friends that have had cancer or they've done chemo and then after they had the chemo was like, Alright, you're done. And then they live in this fear of, is it really gone? Is it going to come back? Am I okay? So I do these tests every 90 days, and I can see where the toxins are being reduced, I can see where some of the other nutrients are becoming more optimal. And I can see exactly where the cancer numbers are. We have a panel of cancer markers that we test, and they have fluctuated, they have gone down to almost gone. They've also gone back up, which to me shows me where I'm not tight on my protocol. It's almost like when you're losing weight, if you have a big cheesecake, you stepped on the scale when the numbers went up. Okay, I gotta get tighter on my protocol. Yeah, so they flipped, right?

It's funny. It's funny, I was just talking to a friend today. There's someone in our life that now has cancer. And we were saying how important it is with and my mom died of it. And I've had, you know, my own bouts and other family members. And yet, even the oncologist said to my friend, you know, when she asked how important is, you know, eating in the food and nutrition, the oncologist said, You know what? It really it's not going to make too big of a name. No. And I remember when my mom dairy was getting chemotherapy. And she was literally the drip going in her arm. And this woman came around with this, like, big bowl of candy, and said, you know, to my mom, would you like when I'm like, no, go away. That feeds the cancer stop. And it was just so incredible. That whole, like, what is happening with that, but I got to keep going. Because there is so much more to Marley, as you have developed into me think about what has transformed since since 2020. Right? I mean, you've had all of these things happen. You found love. You found love. Can you share with us a little bit about this incredible, this this guy from the perspective of we talk relaunch relationships, we talk about as you said, you know, you had a broken marriage, then you go, and you're like, I'm never going to be hurt again, never gonna have this happen. And what allowed you to open up again, and be willing to relaunch in the love.

Ah, and this is I love our story because it's like when you watch a movie and you see the the protagonist hit rock bottom, and then the victory is so much sweeter because of how rock bottom they were like I just to be able to reflect on where I came from. And to then be with this relationship that is like, bigger and better than I could have ever imagined. He loves me so loudly. I feel like I can do my purpose with him. Like, now I wish that I you know, looking back, whisper in that girl's ear like it's okay, leave you have no idea. What's what's on the other side of this. It's just it's going to be so incredible.

I just got massive chills like from my head to my toes. That's when I know. Like my intuition. Everything is just like, oh my god, what a beautiful thing that this is what you're experiencing. Yeah.

When so I moved to Boise to live with my best friend here and heal my broken heart. And gosh, thank God for her. She gave me her guest bedroom in her house with no expiration date said just you have a safe place to heal. And I would go to therapy three times a week crying over Omaha. Why doesn't he love me? What do I have to do? What did I do wrong? And Steven, who also lives in Boise, conveniently, you know, we're just we're friends because we're both we both have online businesses. And we both would speak at similar events. And we're in the same masterminds. We just became friends while we were while I lived in Boise and he also was going through a divorce and so two entrepreneurs going through a similar thing going to actually were born to the same therapist, which is funny Winston has crossed each other at the in the parking lot. That is really funny. We would trade notes on like our therapy that week, which is I mean, that's such an entrepreneur thing to do like our personal development notes. And he started to pursue me to let me know that he wanted more than a friendship and I would say to him, that's, you know, you're so nice and I love our friendship so much, but you're just not my type. Well, like I said before my type was nurses, manipulator cheater abuser. He was way too nice. He loved me for who I was. That's like that wasn't enough. That

right? It's like that How great is that? Yeah.

But eventually this therapy led to me starting to see and I'll tell you like, at the depths of my despair, like I was near suicidal, I didn't, I was like, What do I have to live for? I'm never going to be loved again. Like, I just really believed that. And a friend of mine told me about psychedelic therapy, which I am a huge fan of, and incredible what it's done. For veterans with decades of PTSD, like one session is like five years of therapy in a day. And for me, I mean, Canadian girl growing up, like drugs are bad. I was like, No way. But I also was like, What do I have to lose? I may as well try it. I'm like, desperate. And so I got on a plane, and went to Texas where there was a nurse that facilitated it for me, and I came out of that just I could understand the decades of the patterns of me being attracted to emotionally unhealthy or unavailable people and where that originated in my childhood, not to anyone's fault, just a, you know, an interpretation of childhood trauma that I carried. Why many things?

Why do you think the that therapy worked, where talk therapy wasn't moving the needle, and

the talk therapy was helpful to a point, but gosh, like this psychedelic therapy, and so what I did in was called MDMA. And it's like, I mean, for anyone that skeptical or interested, read the clinical trials, what they've done with veterans and just the incredible results from just one session, because it's, I mean, it's one session, but it's like eight hours because it's in your system. What it does chemically, is it like dumps your serotonin so you're just this huge euphoria, it also reduces your amygdala which is your fear your ego. So imagine being able to look at your life with such compassion. And to be able to it almost is like this truth serum to like, stuff will come up that you didn't even realize that was part of your your baggage, like something that I said that I almost had to do a double taping, did I just say that, like I said, it's easier to it's easier to be poor than to ask for help or to ask for love. I said that it just like came out of my body. It's like I witnessed it was like, why? That's what I believed. Oh,

my gosh, that's, that is an incredible experience you had, yeah.

And it was inside that to be able

to really think about, like, where did that come from? Who did that?

And I had no idea. And I had I had lived with it for 30 ish years of my life, just not knowing. And if I didn't have that exposure, I would have just dated the same man over and over again. Because it wasn't just it wasn't just my relationships. It was my friendships. It was when I had when I worked when I had a boss, so they were my bosses. Yeah,

totally get that. So I do have to make sure because you are such you know, the fact that you were willing to try right? You're, you're saying hey, on one hand, suicidal, I don't even know why am I here? Am I ever gonna find love again? What's happening? I'm gonna give this a try. It worked for you. You ended up meeting Stephen. From a different level you were willing to open up to him. And now how has your because we talk personal. This has been a lot of personal today on the show. But I do want to talk to you about professional and the relaunches that are now going on because your your your career with this honesty that you've given yourself with this openness to so many new modalities, your business is skyrocketing girl and I'd love to have you share more about what that means to you. And why do you think it's taken off so much?

Well, I'll tell you the before picture was very similar to the relationships if I was

funny, isn't it? Is it like your your business a direct reflection of your personal life? And it is interesting?

Yeah. I mean, I was attracted to emotionally unavailable men. And then my clients were also people that I had codependent relationships with that if they needed me at two o'clock in the morning. I mean, I would I would jump through walls to be able to get their approval. And so what kind of a business is that? That sure it might be making money but at what cost? So for for a long time, I had clients that I was just under their thumb, but it was my own fault. Like it could have been a completely different relationship if I would have I was the common denominator of everything. If I would have shown up to for leisure that it would have been a completely different opportunity business, financial situation. And so the before and after to have before and after the divorce before and after the therapy before and after being in a healthy relationship for the first time, was now having healthy relationships with the clients having healthy relationships with my own productivity and my own self worth and business that, hey, if you don't meet a deadline, maybe it's just because you're human. And no one's going to throw you to the wolves because you were late on something or because this video didn't get 1000s of views like the other ones did. And it's it's allowed me to build a business that feels like aligned with my own creative expression, instead of aligned with what I think people want from me, I don't have to be a contortionist in my business anymore.

So good. And there was a video that I watched, that had 2 million people that had watched it, and I looked at your evolution. And I looked at the sincerity. And it was almost like, instead of talking, you now are really it I talk often about three HQ head heart, highest self headquarters of you. And there's a real heart base that has come out of you that has evolved, that has come into your business. And you are, as I said, at the very beginning of the show and exceptional, you help people with YouTube and explode them into becoming those experts in the field. But how have you seen that going away from your head, really tapping into your heart has helped your business flourish.

I mean, I feel like I get to create it from me. Instead of the version of me, I thought people wanted me to be and one of the things that I've marveled over, like after my divorce, I felt more feminine. Like I felt like in my marriage, when things were working, I had to you know, when you're constantly butting heads with someone, or when you're trying to protect yourself or provide for yourself, that's very masculine, it's very like driven, single focused, and after my divorce and letting go of that, like, oh, I don't have to protect myself anymore, especially from the person that is supposed to be your protector and provider in a marriage. I just felt more like when you're in your feminine, that's more creative. It's more flowy. It's more connection communication. And of course, there's there's times for both like, as women, we do have times where we're working in our masculine and we do have times we're working in fat, and for men too, they can work in their feminine too. But it's just felt so much more aligned because I actually get to be me.

So where are you? In 12 to 24 months, what is Marilee? What's Marley doing? Um,

Marley is working with big corporations to train their employees or their agents, their their clients on social media and YouTube, we're going into real estate network marketing and companies to license our curriculums to them so that their companies can be more successful because of their individuals who are building personal brands online. And on a very creative side building continuing to build a YouTube channel that is just pure creative expression, and making movies in Hollywood.

Ah, so we've circled back.

Yes, to circle back

that is so good. How you haven't lost that desire. It was the wrong time. And now, because of how you've changed how you've relaunched, it's now going to be the right time. That is so awesome. So how can people find you? How can they connect with you?

Thank you. Well, yeah, come check me out on YouTube, look up Marley Jaxx, also Instagram slash Marley Jaxx. I respond to all my DMs there. So it's never an assistant or a bot. It's always me. And you can also check out if you go to ChiefContentOfficer.co That's how we help people to grow their content and their YouTube channels. Marley Jaxx

And that's J A X X. We're gonna have everything in the show notes. What an awesome show today was and I mean, it was just like, I can't tell you how much I appreciated your insights. There's so much to take away from this episode. I will definitely be going and re listening to it. I hope everyone out there feels the same way because there were so many nuggets, not just the maybe it's just Omaha there were a lot in there. So definitely everyone check it out again, Marley thank you for being here. And I always say live now love now, relaunch into your remarkable now and let's all make that mark in the world that will have the impact that each and every one of you, so deserves to make. So until next week. Get out there, relaunch yourself personally professionally, take the advice of Marley and really don't settle. There's no there is no time like the present. To really ask yourself the question go back in those relaunches replay the scripts replay the stories you're telling yourself and create a new one, create like as if you are a director, a, you're making a movie of a lifetime. And go ahead, you're the star. You're the star of your show. So again, thank you everyone for being here and we will be back next week. Take care