April 27, 2023

Divine Intervention - Byron Applegate

Divine Intervention - Byron Applegate

Remember the unbelievable story about the father who went bankrupt and dreamt that he had ended his life and witnessed the aftermath of his suicide? Remember how the next morning Steve Hardison showed up in his house and said “I’ve been with you all night.”

His name is Byron Applegate and in this vulnerable conversation with Philippe Bartu, he bares his soul in a heart-wrenching story that has moved so many readers to tears. Discover how the power of keeping his word, saved his life and the biggest lessons he learnt from the ultimate wake-up call. Buckle up for an awe-inspiring journey as we delve into this “other-worldy" story of resilience, love, and the power of the human spirit.

About the Guest:

Byron Applegate is a real estate investor who has known Steve Hardison for over 30 years. He was privileged enough to have Steve as his mentor, boss and coach. He considers Steve to he one of the 5 most influential people in his life. 

About the Host:

Philippe Bartu is a recovering people-pleasing hotelier that became a stressed-out restaurant owner and survivor of severe burnout in 2008. This led him to become a seeker of deeper meaning and purpose in life. In doing so he had a profound spiritual realisation. He saw that every human being is always ok and perfect. 

Over the last 8 years, he has led transformational international retreats and coaching programs that have helped hundreds of clients replace stress and anxiety with fun, ease, and play. He is passionate about relationships and is on a mission to create a world with less drama and more fully expressed, authentic human beings.

By reading The Ultimate Coach, Philippe deeply saw how we create our future from a place of being limited or being unlimited. Today, he helps his clients transform their relationships with their own limitations and become powerful unlimited creators.

www.philippebartu.com 


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Transcript
TUCP Intro/Outro:

Welcome to The Ultimate Coach podcast conversations from being inspired by the book The Ultimate coach, written by Amy Hardison, and Alan Thompson. Join us each week with the intention of expanding your state of being, and your experience will be remarkable. Remember, this is a podcast about be. It is a podcast about you. To explore more deeply visit theultimateCoachbook.com. Now, enjoy today's conversation from being

Philippe Bartu:

welcome back. My name is Philippe Bartu. And out of all the extraordinary stories in the ultimate coach, book one of them really stuck out for me. It moved me to tears. And many people have the same experience that I've spoken to. This is the story of Byron Applegate. And it's the kind of story that if you hear you would almost think that this happened for real. Brian, I'm so delighted to for you to be here today. Thank you for joining us.

Byron Applegate:

Absolutely. This is my pleasure. And I agree with you. It is this for real. That's something that would go through my mind if I was reading it to, like, is this a Disney episode? From Yeah, I'm with you.

Philippe Bartu:

Yeah. And yeah, I just want to start before before we jump in, I want to acknowledge you for what it took for you to be here today. I know that being on podcasts is something you've never done before. And the story has been held very sacred to you. And outside the book you haven't really shared it. With, with anyone.

Unknown:

Yeah, yeah, that's true. You know, it's just really sensitive. I mean, it's, it's, it's magical, but it's, it's, it's sensitive. It shows my me at my most vulnerable point. And to even say, or acknowledged to ourselves that, hey, I've had suicidal thoughts. I'm not going to lie. It's almost embarrassing. Like, really, you thought about killing yourself. But, man, it was a dismal time. And I haven't shared this I don't I don't, I haven't told my children the story. My closest family and friends, I haven't told the story. In fact, when Alan Thompson reached out to me, asking me to share with him my experiences with Steve, this is what came to mind. And so I you know, I shared what I thought was very poignant in my life of a huge, obviously, a huge time in my life, a huge event, if you will. So when he asked me to share it, and I wrote it, I'm not kidding you, Philip. I cried. Like I couldn't write it without crying. I couldn't edit it without crying. I couldn't reread it without crying. When I sent it, and Amy came back to me Aimia Steve's wife, when she came back to me with edits, I when I read it again, I cried, and you're getting ready to talk to you. I read it again. And I was like home for the first time I could read it without crying. So

Philippe Bartu:

that's so beautiful. What is it that made you accept the invitation to be here today?

Unknown:

You, you the conversation that we had the energy that you put out the fact that I feel and felt not only safe with you, but a responsibility to do this, because it might help. And so kind of putting some of my own guardedness aside, because I think it's the right thing to do.

Philippe Bartu:

That's beautiful. Thank you for saying that. And I'd like to start by hearing that story again. And maybe you can just give us a reminder because if you haven't read the book, go and read the story first. Before listening to this as and at the same time. I want to hand it over to you by take us back to it was just a few months before 911 Yeah, it's just a few months

Unknown:

before when things are great. Yeah, right. And that summer was man I thought I'd arrived. It was everything was clicking right i yacht shopping had net jets fly in a plane and all this stuff going on, you know that the valuation of the company, everything was just clicking. And then it didn't. With 911 I don't I'm not a I'm not a victim 1011. I'm just saying that in that moment was financial disarray. We didn't know what was going to happen, right? And then the not knowing is is people don't know what to do. I mean, if you have information, you can make a decision. But if you don't have all your information, it's hard to make a decision. So in our business where we collected bad debt, we didn't know whether or not people were going to have the resources to pay on that. So our things started spiraling out of control with the aftermath of 911. It No, it wasn't, it wasn't. See, I guess I was being very reactionary. That's probably the right way to say it. I wasn't being proactive. I wasn't following a plan I was trying to keep from going under.

Philippe Bartu:

And what I understood from the story is you were also in denial about your, the dire situation of your finances, and just trying to get loans to keep things afloat.

Unknown:

Yeah. Do you want me to tell a little bit of that? Yeah, yeah, certainly.

Philippe Bartu:

Just just I kind of painted the story. Yeah, paint a bit of the picture, sort of where you were at when, when, when all of that was going on.

Unknown:

So there was a time before the experience with Steve, and I think we're going to talk about that. But the, the reality is that I started borrowing money at a huge velocity. You know, putting money on huge cash advances on credit lines, blew through a half a million dollars, in about two months of my own money, went through about another million dollars of, of credit lines over the next two or three months, and was doing everything I can to just keep my business afloat, and keep offices open. And I started drinking a lot. And I wasn't really a big drinker before. But I started drinking a lot. And I started working through the night and I just go to the office started keeping vodka in the fridge at the office, and just trying to find a way to keep the business afloat. And I and I was started having really weird thoughts. I don't know where they come from, that's actually a decent question to think of where do these thoughts come from, and maybe we can drill down on that later. But, you know, drive down the road. And I think if I just yanked the steering wheel to the left, in hit, whether it was, you know, go off that cliff or hit that car, hit that polar, started thinking that she just just pull hard and is over. And that thought would pop in my head. And I've never had those kinds of thoughts before. But started being something that was occurring for me regularly. And it was not something I was talking to anybody about. And I am well, then we come to the dream. Do you want to talk about the dream? Yeah, let's go there. So, so the if you've seen or, you know, the Christmas tale, I think it's Charles Dickens, where you have any of Scrooge and he dies and you have the angel death. And that comes in. Criss Angel, Christmas past, Angel Christmas present those guys. Well, this night, I have an angel walking me through the aftermath of my life, or my family's life after my death. And as this angel and I, our guide, and I are walking through my life or my my children's lives in my wife's life, because I'm not there and seeing how their life looks and realizing the mess that I'd left them, and knowing that it was my fault, knowing that they were living in a different existence, like small, small town. I remember one of our main part of the dream specifically I remember is seeing my son Hunter, playing baseball on a little dirt field in a little small town in Utah. And there's really nobody in the stands, but you know my wife and my daughter and Thinking, he's never going to have the opportunities. Because he doesn't have me. And I'm not here to help him have opportunity. There was my fault. And in the morning when I woke up, if you've ever had a dream where you when you wake up and you're not sure if

Philippe Bartu:

there's a piece of the story, I just want to make sure that is clear. Just say with my angel. Who was it that was there in your dream? I'm,

Unknown:

I'm going to tell you in a second, if that's okay, because there's a timing to that, like everybody knows, but this is really poignant for me if that's alright, that I wake ups feeling that kind of foggy feeling of you know, when you're kind of caught between dream world and real world. And, and I remember I stood up and I went out, just open the door to go out into the pool from my bedroom and fell in the pool naked. And I'm just floating kind of looking at the sky thinking, What the heck, what was that? And my wife came out and she has her my robe, and she says, Hey, you might want to put this on steep partisans here. And I go what? She said, Yeah, he's in the living room. So I get out of the pool. Naked, which is right in front of the living room, by the way. And I put my robe on, I walk in, I come out and I see Steve and anybody listening to this, who knows, Steve knows that. He's going to give you a big ol hug. So here I am naked in a robe. And Steve gives me his big ol bear hug. And, and I just said, Steve, what are you doing here? Nick, you know, keep in mind, Steve has never been to this house. I've known Steve for 30 years, but he'd never been to this home. And he said, I've been with you all night. So the answer to your question Phillip is it was Steve Hardison. And I started to tell him about my dream. And he said, I know, I had the same dream. And as weird as it is, as magical as it is, as sci fi as Star Trek, or whatever you want to call it as it is. We've had the same dream. And we've talked about it since. It's just a magical moment, where somehow he and I had this dream. And he was my angel. And he was there to walk me through the aftermath. Yeah. And I'm still

Philippe Bartu:

incomplete. Oh, in that story, that's to said, so divine, so beautiful. And what happened after that?

Unknown:

I think the choice of words you just had was really spot on. You know, it was divine. It was divine. You know, how is it that we're all connected? You know, what is that? We're, you know, people have different religions, or thoughts, and, you know, theories about how that all works. And not to really jump into one sector. And other I'm just saying somehow, we are all connected. And in that moment, for Steve to be connected with me in a way that he would not just share the dream. But when what he told me was when he woke up, he knew that he had to save my life.

Philippe Bartu:

Yeah. So in that moment, would you say you experienced that connection, that you felt you were connected to something far greater than that? Is that something you've experienced?

Unknown:

In that moment? I wouldn't say so. In the after, math, I would say I've experienced it a lot. Right? In that moment, just keeping in mind, I was in a really dismal place. In fact, one of the things Steve said to me as we're sitting there on a couch talking is Byron, you're already bankrupt. You just don't, you're just in denial. And, and I, I wasn't sure if I should be ascended or enlightened. It was a little bit of both. But realistically, that as I look back on it over the years, yes, I see like, whatever you want to call God, I call God God. Saved my life. She saved me for another day, for a reason. And Steve got to be the angel. I think if your STD probably would tell you that it was he feels blessed. You know that to be able to be called on for that to be the maybe the conduit that that came through. I don't you certainly doesn't have any any ego about it. Now it was and neither do I. It's isn't, you know, like, when you asked me to do this, I said, as long as this isn't really about how great I am or how great Steve is, because that was such a moment of bigger than that. Yeah, these two guys.

Philippe Bartu:

Yeah. I mean, the word that comes to me is divine intervention. Yeah, like something greater of the essence of divinity created an intervention that stopped you

Unknown:

from committing suicide and loving. I think you package that correctly. I like the way you put that. I think you're right. It was divine intervention. And it was to preserve my life for another day. And maybe to teach me and now by us sharing this maybe teach others?

Philippe Bartu:

Yeah. So from that experience in your life, how? How was your life? Like the day to day? Once? What do you notice that you're or if anything at all was different, or that you're more sensitive to? From that experience?

Unknown:

One of the well, let me tell you that I did end up declaring bankruptcy and going through that process. And before bankruptcy, it feels like death, you're going to lose everything, there's certainly ego attached to going bankrupt for anybody. And in on the other side, so it's still a struggle, right, I had to get through that time of my life. But on the other side of it, I realized that bankruptcy was just just a word. It's just an event. Yeah. And you know, I sleep in the same exact bed with the same exact woman, and I've hated that. And I pet the same exact dog. The only difference is, I don't know all these people. And yeah, I don't have the same house and some of the stuff I had had to go away. It was the end of the birth, if you will, realizing what's really important in life, and getting like, get, get over money, get into relationships and experience and savoring life and being full of a lot of gratitude. I remember the day my bankruptcy was discharged, how I felt like I just lost 1000 pounds of all the pressure the world off for me. And I remember, like, even since then, like you asked me about, you know what it's like now even anybody who comes to me for coaching, or advice or mentoring, one of the first things I tell people is, do you want to know how to handle stress, start with gratitude. If I would have been in gratitude, I wouldn't have been suicidal. But I wasn't included. I was in denial, I was in resistance. I was in ego. You know. I hadn't learned but I was blessed enough. I want to choose that word carefully. Because it really was a blessing that someone would save my life and helped me learn so that I could still be here and share it with someone else.

Philippe Bartu:

You know, I'm also just hearing the lightness from that, in losing everything, how you, you can lose all of that money and your possessions, but you can never lose the essence of who you are and who you are being. When Who are you being when you start to notice that? Like, what were the shifts that you started to experience at the level of your being?

Unknown:

Well, to start with, there was the event. And those of you who know, Steve, or have worked with Steve, you'll know that Steve's

Philippe Bartu:

really big on commitment.

Unknown:

In fact, if you hire Steve, he charges what he charges to make sure you're committed. His it's not about he's trying to be expensive, because he's not it's not even that he's flamboyant, or something with money, because he's not he, he wants you to be committed. And he committed, he sat with me that day and said, Listen, I need you to give me your word on something. Now having worked with Steve, I understand what that means you better be willing to die for it. Don't you dare give Steve Hardison your word and not keep it. He used to say, if you have an appointment, Steve, he used to say, if if I'm not there, I'm dead. And if I'm if I'm late, check the obituaries. I mean, he's serious about keeping commitments and he said I need you to give me your word. You're going to call me before you kill yourself and give me a chance. And I gave him my word. And that's what saved my life. Honestly, it was in that moment not even that. Yeah. Because I knew that I wasn't going to make that call to Steve Hardison, and, and then he said, I need to know I need you to make another commitment to me. You're not safe to drive. So you don't drive anywhere, for the next week, and maybe two. But I want you to go anywhere you go with someone else driving. And if you don't have somebody to drive you, then you don't go. And again, I gave him my work. And again, that's what saved my life. I think I, you know, I don't remember how much I said in the book, to be honest. But just reconnecting with people and saying, Hey, come give me a ride. And this goes back to where you're saying, asking about being about this. I call my little sister who's eight years younger and say, Hey, can you give me a ride? And I live a mile from my office? She lives 10 miles away. Mindy, can you come pick me up and take me to my office? Sure. Why what's up? I'm not safe to drive. Yeah. And then didn't didn't have to share with your sister and talk to her about what's really going on. And other friends and other people. And so that commitment made me connect with others. And I think that goes to what you're asking about. Yeah. Where am I am? I'm being connected with people.

Philippe Bartu:

Yeah, well, it force you to get out of isolation and be in connection.

Unknown:

Yeah. And it's one of the reasons I said yes to do. Yes. Yeah. Can we connect in a way that someone hears this? Whether they're really whether they're suicidal or not, isn't even the question? Yeah. Do you need to get out of your own head, you need to get out of your own fear, pain or whatever, to connect with people.

Philippe Bartu:

Yeah, that's so beautiful, because it people that are listening to this, you know, they don't need to be suicidal. But I think a lot of people can relate to what it feels like to feel like you're, you've got the weight of the world around you. And I know, looking back in my life, when I was 29 years old, I had a restaurant. And it was, it was a time when I was very successful. On the outside, we're very, very staff extremely stressed, and very, very committed to looking good, and surviving, and just trying to trust trying to make it really. And then that I had a seizure. And I was forced to close the restaurant. And I separated with my girlfriend, who would, we'd been together for nine years. And it was the letting go of the two things I cherished the most and I was most afraid to lose, that allow me to access to my biggest liberation. And I felt so, so free, because I was no longer attached to the very two things I was most attached to. And very, very confused. And it was still even though you know, I was met with a lot of pain. But ultimately, it gave me such a sense of freedom. And it opened me up to them explore and connect with with the world in a way that I I was so just caught up in the busyness of life. Before that I had hadn't even realized how isolated I had made myself be. And, and I think that's something a lot of people can can relate to, because it's almost like socially acceptable, to be always busy. But at the same time like that busyness becomes a way of being that creates really info it affects your listening, it affects your presence, it affects your ability to just be in life. Use as I've seen,

Unknown:

because I know you shared with me once about the restaurant, but you just said something that kind of made me think it's a very social business. You were in a restaurant, slash bar right? It was both didn't have a restaurant and a bar.

Philippe Bartu:

Yeah, I was very social. I was around people all day long.

Unknown:

And yet you felt isolated.

Philippe Bartu:

I felt so isolated. Because what I was the difference between it's actually the for me was the highest form of loneliness is feeling lonely in a room full of people. It's it's a different experience than feeling lonely when you're just by yourself. For me, it was a there was a superficiality to my profession, which really required pleasing. So so what I just became very good at pleasing and it was the restaurant was a stage and I was an actor. And I put on a facade. And I was very, very good looking cool, calm and collected. Went inside. I was just hiding how stressed I was and how much fear I had about With all the possible things that could go wrong, I was always thinking about the future and work, everything I still need to do. And so it was just, it was a very confusing time for me because I felt like I had created all the conditions in my life that I thought I needed to be happy and successful. But I just felt empty, lost, and just really stressed actually, just the whole time. And I was able to hide it like, you know, it's like this, I was functionally depressed. Like, if you looked at me, you would say, this is a, this is a great guy. He's like, God, he's just like, I was in denial about how bad it was. See, I wouldn't even admit it to myself. And if you if he would ask me, I would just tell you how great everything is. Yeah. That that that's the level of self denial and just disconnection.

Unknown:

So I think this is really kind of, I'm really glad you shared that. Because this is the the place where the magic happened happened in this story, right. And it's It's Supernatural, crazy magical to anybody who reads it, including me and Steve. Yeah, and, and yet it happened. And then your, your story where you you've built a successful business, and a long term relationship. And yet you felt alone and stressed and isolated, but you didn't look like it. I think that, at the essence of what happened for me, was a any, any eternal, if you will, or outside of our bodies, like we're, however, works out that our that our spirits and our souls Connect. Yeah, intuition where that comes from. Something in that realm of where we connect is where Steve and I connected. And I've known him a really long time. I think it's important to note that Steve and I were not like, we're not best friends. He hadn't been to my home. I think I said that earlier. And he and I weren't really talking. But yet he would I were connected in this realm to where we had this experience. And he loved me enough to come over and be there with me. And I think about like, Have you ever gone to a funeral. And after the funeral, you just feel like, man, you got your priorities straight. You see this person, maybe they were younger or not, but more. So when someone's younger, that passes away that you think you're grateful, you spent a lot of time in gratitude, you maybe don't rush back to work, you go ahead and go get lunch or dinner with your wife or who you're with, and you spend some quality time. And you just get your priorities straight. Because you realize that you've been on the hamster wheel. And you went to a funeral and you knew this person, and all of a sudden you're like, dang. So grateful for the people in my life. I'm grateful for my health. Instead of thinking I need something, you start being grateful for what you have, right? That's kind of a common experience with generals. Yeah. And then fast forward, like, I don't know, 72 hours, you forget all about that. And you're back on a hamster wheel. Right? That's happened to everybody write? Well, what do you do to stay connected so that you fill up don't become isolated? What do I Byron do so that I stay connected with other people maybe err on the side of vulnerable instead of on the side of arrogant, which would be my tendency, err, err on the side of like, I got this. I'll do it all my way. You know, force versus faith, force versus faith. Connected versus isolated. Yeah. Humble. You know, allowing, allowing the universe to bless you allowing other people to help you, which is super hard to let other people help you. Yeah, those are the things when you say what, what did it affect me, you realize what I'm talking about? over 20 years later? And so what what does it affect me like now? Be grateful for what I have? And be connected with? The people? Um, if GST whose favorite client is or what is that he's working with? You probably would tell you whoever is right in front of me. Yeah. Right. And something along that lines. Yeah. And you know, can we be that way? I think we're getting better. I'm getting better at it. I haven't known you that long but I think you're good at it is really can you be present to who's in front of you and really connect with the person in front of you? Because we are all connected? When we act when we act isolated like an act I'm saying act because somehow we buy our own bullshit and we get we believe our we believe we're independent. When we don't and we become connected, there's so much beauty. Yeah, love. There's helping there's and then bounty comes your way. Yes. crazy it is as it is that we don't try to force it. Things come, you can trust the universe

Philippe Bartu:

as being in connection versus being in isolation, like as a distinction most, for most of my life, you know, I wasn't I didn't have that clarity of distinction. And I just found out, I had a superficial level of connection and my work. And, and it wasn't until I got present to the fact that I was living a life of superficiality and, you know, isolation that I can actually see, there's another way I see now looking back is, connection is is is like the slight the WD 40 of like, you know, everything in my life and in how I live, I mean, I have a five month old baby, and I tell you, it's just like, wow, I can't imagine life without connection now. And, and it's just, it's just beautiful, to just to be reminded of vampire and to also just acknowledge how, you know, the whole, the whole experience of reading this book has been an experience of coming closer to home closer to spirit closer to this miracle that we can only describe as a miracle of what happens when we start to experience ourselves as someone who is connected to everyone and everything. And then we start seeing that this miraculous ways of being the book emanates is something that we all can be. And then it becomes exciting and full of possibility. And that's what this is. That's what these conversations are designed to remind us of. Because we can forget, right? Yeah,

Unknown:

it's like I said, you go to a funeral and 72 hours later, you're back on it. But boy, right after that funeral, you're so connected with whoever you're with, or walk around the room and you hug other people that you haven't son forever, and you're like, you want to connect you say hey, let's do lunch, and then you don't? Yeah, you don't go to lunch you saw somebody you haven't seen in a year. Oh, man, I miss you'd love to see let's do lunch. And then you don't? I'm not I'm not I'm not the only person who's done that. In so what, what I think? Is the the magic last is learning to say yes, maybe to a podcast, yes to lunch, actually find time. When someone when someone reaches out to you. You don't know if they're hurting? You think about that. Somebody's like, hey, Phil, how's it going? Hey, you wanna do lunch? Sometime? Like, dude, I'm really busy. You don't know, maybe that guy really needs to see you. So say yes, every time you can, and try to make room for people. Because people have made room. At least I can't speak for anyone else. But look, somebody went out of their way to come to my house and save my life. The Universe went out of its way. Because I was too sick headed. Probably, you know, somebody else would need a miracle, but boy I did. I'm just really grateful, Philip, I gotta be honest, is the fact that that that I got to have that experience, and that I get to focus on who I need to be, you know, when I write my goals down now, in this case, I'm just like everybody else. Yes. I've been a student of Steven artists. And yes, I've known him for 30 years. But really, when the book came out, it made me start really looking at boom, have I been? And mostly some from some conversations with Steve, where he's like, you read the book yet? Did you ask yourself the questions? Did you read the back cover? Did you read the questions? I mean, then read it again. And so I started doing that and looking at who I need to be. And now when I write goals, and I do my goals, for my goals, I asked myself the question, Who do I need to be to accomplish this goal? And actually write that on my as I write? Yeah. And if we were to look at this and say, you know, what are we doing? Well, we're connecting. That's right. I mean, you're 10,000 miles away and we're connecting. Yeah, we're sharing this with people we've we've neither one ever met and maybe

Philippe Bartu:

want to connect. Yeah. Yeah, that's what we're creating. We're creating this more connection. We're also creating access to Yes. I know what to say to that like access to there's a sense of my something much greater than ourselves. So access to yet this word divinity that keeps coming back. And you know, like after, after having been in conversation with you. It's not the first time we speak I have because I tell you what happened to me as I started becoming a lot more present to the synchronicities. I started to read, I was reminded about this idea of going from instance, in like, an inspired idea to action. So I would be I started reaching out again to people that before I would kind of talk myself out of and I'd be like, Oh, I'm gonna connect with this person. And, and I did that right after us. Right, right after speaking to you. And with two people happen that they just said to me, Oh, I was just thinking of your how nice that you wrote to me. And, and it was almost like that conversation just reactivated that. We are all connected. And in a way, I was like, Oh, that's nice. But as I as I start to think about it, well, that's a miracle right there, that that very person at the other side of the world was thinking of me that I wrote to her and that started a new that's just started a whole new conversation and to me that you know, that that that can look like that's just ordinary but it's there's there's something extraordinary about that, that I that I'm really getting present to.

Unknown:

Not everybody knows who Wayne Dyer was. Some people are his fans, and some people not. Most people know who Deepak Chopra is. And they were friends. Right? And I shared this story with you, but they were friends and Wayne you. There's a there's a tape recording out there where Wayne is talking to Deepak Chopra. And he goes, Well, Deepak Chopra calls Wayne. And Wayne said or no Wayne calls Deepak Chopra. I don't get it. I get it right the first time. Deepak Chopra calls Wayne. And Wayne says, you know, I was just thinking of you. And Deepak Chopra's response was, yeah, I got your message in the field. The infinite field. And that's, I think the experience you had with your friend. Yeah, or the fact that I have in two hours from now somebody's picking me up to take me to the airport. I was taking an Uber. And, and I wasn't I am self sufficient. You know, you're grown man. I know how to get there. Get an Uber. And and my daughter called me Hey, Daddy, what time you go into the airport? And I said, Oh, you know 430 She goes, Do you want to ride? I got none. And I'll Uber. She goes, why? I go no, because all over you don't need to bother to get rush hour traffic bla bla bla. No, no, no, I want to take you, Scarlett, my granddaughter, Scarlett. And I want to see you

Unknown:

say yes.

Unknown:

Let them let them serve you. Yeah. Let them serve you. What are they going to get out instead of being so dang independent? serve you? And then what else is going to come from it? Other than the fact that I can see my granddaughter? Which is like my whole week up there? What about the littlest thing? Let someone serve you? Or be the guy who says no, let me take you. Yeah, because we get to connect our world makes it easy. We can do everything on phone, internet, you know, pick some social media, we can be self sufficient. Have food delivered to our houses, and a car pick us up. But where's the human connection? Where's the need and meet like, we all have needs, letting somebody help you satisfy your needs and then helping someone else satisfy there's that that Intune place where we are all connected in the infinite field?

Philippe Bartu:

Yeah, whatever you call it. Yeah.

Unknown:

Is, I think how is the only explanation I can give you for how that even happened. And then the magic. Really, the magic is now I'm here, I'm alive. I'm sharing this. And I'm learning. I'm still learning. I'm growing. I'm becoming more based in love based in gratitude, not based in things and based on accomplishments. I have more faith, I trust the universe. And in that moment, back then Philip, I was trying to make it happen because I was going to will it I was going to force it. There was no allowance there was there was no faith it was just me getting it frickin done. And in reality I probably should just stopped and let it go but I didn't know how to let go. And then probably a whole nother podcast but learning how to let go you know use your restaurant after like how do you let go nine year relationship or seven? Yeah, nine years nine and nourish To ship and building like building your restaurant, we had to have been like, alright, he

Philippe Bartu:

wouldn't you wouldn't believe how, how many times I heard, you know, the voice saying Slow down, slow down, slow down. And I would just override it. Because my Kasia says I'll slow us down. Exactly. Yeah, I was just trying to make it. Yeah. Right.

Unknown:

I think that's I think that's ego. I know of course, egos. Right. But driving force,

Philippe Bartu:

it isn't, you know, we identify with this isolated self. You know, I need to push through, I need to do it. And you know, and that, that that creates. Yeah, just a lot of stress and isolation. Yeah. Yeah, this has been, this has just been an amazing reminder for me, as you share your story just to reflect back on my life as well. And just how grateful I am for, you know, the way that you showed up today was so beautiful, the way that you shared so vulnerably and, and impactfully. I feel I feel really moved. By our time together tonight, Brian, so thank you for Yeah, for who you've been, throughout this conversation, I really feel I really feel connected to something far greater. And that's so beautiful to feel. For people who want to know more about you, or if they want to be in touch with you, how could they? How could they connect with you, Byron,

Unknown:

you know, I'm not a social media guy. I just so if you look me up on Facebook, I think there is a page, but if you message me, I'll never see it. So my email is byron.applegate@gmail.com. You can reach out to me, I'm happy to help anybody I can, or connect with anybody who wants

Philippe Bartu:

to connect. Great. Well, we'll put that in the show notes. And Brian, will we've come to the end of our time together. And just want to say again, thank you so much for your beautiful contribution today. And thank you for all the listeners as well who have been listening with us. Via Is there anything you want to say before we before we complete this episode tonight?

Unknown:

Yeah, I I want to say first of all, thanks to you, Philip for being a man who wanted to instigate this conversation and share with the world and gift to the world, your the way you're putting your heart and soul into doing this, I first of all, appreciate and acknowledge you. I also want to acknowledge Steve Hardison for being a man who is so not just like to say the word committed to people, but to be committed to me in the way that he he has been, and that he would show up, not just at my door to save my life, but to show up in my life to save my life. And to help better my life. And the gift that Steve has been to me, I want to make sure I acknowledge Him, because He has been one of the most influential people in my life. And the number of stories are, are countless. I also want to acknowledge Amy for all the hard work she put into doing the book, and Alan Thompson for all the work that he did. What an undertaking. And then I think I'd want to leave on being grateful for the couple of things I learned. I learned a lot about commitment from Steve Hardison. I know we're short on time, but I will tell you that I if I can really quick, really quick story.

Philippe Bartu:

Can I please God?

Unknown:

There was a time this is 20 something years ago, when I asked Steve, I used to wake up on Monday mornings and be really stressed out and kind of paralyzed. Like I wouldn't really get things going. And I asked him, Do you Do you ever experience that like a paralysis of just anxiety? And he said, Oh, yeah, of course I thought he'd say no, because I thought he was Superman. And I said, Well, what do you do? He goes, Well, I just look at whatever my commitments are, and I go to work on him. He said, usually within 10 minutes, we'll solve it. But 100% of the time within an hour. If I just focus on doing my commitment, that anxiety will go away. And I'll find myself in the zone and stuff will start happening that I now have Monday mornings be sacred, any of my family or friends who say hey, you know, let's get together next week. I say not on Mondays. Because Mondays are crushing it. I go to work on my commitments, I get my week set up. And I learned to do that from Steve being like, turn to your commitment. And I told you what say My life was that he made me to him. So just that lesson in being committed, and then I want to acknowledge Him for that by just helping to teach me who I'm being even now and to reach out and call me and say Barney reading the book, and are you? Are you thinking about how you're being? It's a book on being? I'm like, No, it's not a book on being. It's a book about the ultimate. Well, then you need to read it again. No, but to God. I mean, yeah. And I want make sure that whoever hears this, here's that, you know, as I get connection and who we're being, it's just really the essence.

Philippe Bartu:

Yeah, thank you for that story. That's such a practical, really powerful reminder. Come back to your commitment. Get back into action. You know, like, honor your commitment, don't identify with your thoughts and feelings and anxiety.

Unknown:

Yeah, sometimes. I don't know where all that comes from. Sometimes that stuff can really lack all of us. Right. Everybody has been a victim of the mental militia. That is just, you know, what, what are they? What are they? What's going on here? Yeah. You could just be confused by the thoughts in your head. Yeah. Yeah. So thanks for having me, Philip. I really appreciate it. I think I appreciate you inviting me to be part of your program.

Philippe Bartu:

You will. Hey, thank you, Byron, thank you for joining. And thank you again to all our listeners. Till next time. All right, have a great day. You say bye. Bye.