Embracing the Demolition - AnneMarie OHalloran

TUCP Intro/Outro: Welcome to The Ultimate Coach podcast conversations from being inspired by the book The Ultimate Coach, written by Amy Hardison, and Alan Thompson. Join us each week with the intention of expanding your state of being, and your experience will be remarkable. Remember, this is a podcast about be. It is a podcast about you. To explore more deeply, visit TheUltimateCoachBook.com Now, enjoy today's conversation from be

Hello, and welcome back to The Ultimate Coach Podcast. I'm Ipek Williamson, one of the hosts for this show and today, I'm really excited to introduce a remarkable individual because journey exemplifies the essence of personal growth and transformation. AnneMarie OHalloran, as certified wisdom sent center life coach, behavioral therapists, hypnotherapist and more. AnneMarie, welcome to the show.

Thank you, II pack. I'm very honored to be here. Thank you.

Well, you are one of the bubbliest most energy filled joyful members of the ultimate coach community that I know of AnneMarie, can you share the story of how you were introduced to the ultimate coach book by Amy Hardison, and Ellen D. Thompson. Let's talk about that a little bit first, before getting to to you joining the community.

Oh, yes. And thank you so much for asking that question. Because I love telling the story about it. I was actually in a very dark, dark place in 2021. And I spent eight months total in bed five months was continuous, following the year of losing my father, the patriarch of the family, which was difficult, difficult on the family. And so in bad, I've got very creative and I even on my back in my bed for five months, I started writing a book. And it was about returning home to a dying parent, because all my friends this age are doing that. And stepping back into a dysfunctional family. And the paths you've left behind has now become your present and your future. So this is not uncommon. I don't see myself as so unique. Others will have experienced my experience as duty Thurston was my writing code. And after you have a major surgery like that, you are not supposed to fly for six months to a year, I believe, to prevent embolism, you can actually have an artery explode in an airplane and die. And I was not at the point where I was free to fly yet. And Judy said to me, I think you need to come to Arizona, come to my retreat. And by the way, on Sunday, there's a book signing, please buy this book, and get on an airplane. So here I am literally risking my life to get out of my bed only weeks out of bed, to fly to Arizona to have this book on Kindle, reading it feverishly and furiously like a high school student late for a forgotten assignment and not absorbing it and just taking a hand like like chugging water, like as fast as I can get it down. And I get to this retreat that was phenomenal. I think there was eight or 12 women and we all went to the event. The booksigning Arizona another funny thing is, Judy, had just held a retreat. He didn't stay home. She didn't meditate. She didn't do breathing exercises. She was feeding was breakfast and dressing herself and running out the door. And that's how powerful she was. And being with her we sat very close to the front. In fact, I was sitting right behind Stephen Amy and I was class clown. And if I have a side remark and a side crack that comes out and so here I am trickling in GN Amy's chuckling and then we go to the after party and I need Steve and Karen Bri and Gabby tuna and you just Sarah Nani Alex Dumas, all these people not knowing who any of them are. And so it was like going to this green banquet and having no way to digest it. I had taken a real big bite of the apple. I went how to chew it all up. But it wasn't until I got into the community that I was really able to digest what had just happened to me. And if it had not been for Judy and biting me or a treat, I can seriously not know or my life would be right now. I would it saved my life, this community that weekend, that moment. Wow.

I'm so glad I asked the question. Yes. And the ultimate coach community seems to have played a significant role in your journey. And just like it did on many of us. So can you elaborate on the kind of impact this community has had on your personal life and professional approach? And Marie?

Yes, I'm significant is an absolute understatement. I am radiating somebody wants throw me that all my qualities or log ingredients, and Steve's sitting on the back burner, and one day, my stew of the search and sweetheart, it's time to grab a bowl and a spoon because it's coming to the front burner. And it's because of this group that that has happened, though, what it is, with my personal professional. So first of all, it's genuinely changed my life on a molecular level. And from there, I'm able to serve others from knowing who I am, I was told who I was through projection and triangulation of traumatic abuse. I had nobody reflecting any goodness back at me. People on this site for instance, you at your introduction of me, I had never seen that as if I was looking at myself to a soggy mirror my entire life. And this, this group has cleared that fog that I can undeniably accept my truth and live it just believe and genuinely with integrity and pride and and serve others from that space. So I've actually connected with this group is through connection bingo. Also just reaching out and telling people I feel a nut, let's connect. I've personally connected with over 100 people. I've personally given away over 30 books, only two of them were in India, I personally traveled to spend time face to face with as many TDC members as I can. For instance, my saying is everybody's taller on Zoom except date. Borton. Okay, Dave, Dave and Steve are about the same height, but very different stature. So I like to feel the presence of the energy. I've been to the Arizona event didn't know much. I went to the India event that was much more in fact, impactful. I will be going to the Birmingham event, traveling extensively through UK. But even in Arizona, I go went through my birthday. I spent a day with three different members. I met with Lane netting who took me to a play. I had coffee with Julian hell, why hello, Wyatt. We are philosophical where wisdom and wit combined. And then I had dinner with Andrea and Marlon. The next day I had my birthday with you know, Lindsey and Casey Gilman, Judy Thurston, Martha, Martha jackers all these people, some on Hollyanne, you know, and then I ended I drive all the time to go see Irene Jenkins and Judy Cutler, because they live relatively close. And so I work with energy, I love to feel people's energy. So I make it a point to touch physically as many ESP people as I can. And until I come your way on the map, I encourage everybody to reach out to me, DM me, and I'll be there with you in spirit, and I'll bring my energy to you.

Wow, this is so amazing. And I'm so glad you are my first ever guest on the ultimate coach podcast today. Anne Marie, because I thought you have a different energy, you have a different way of showing up. And really, it's a honor to have you here and how what a beautiful example you are to this community. So thank you for sharing all this with us. And many listeners right now in our audience may be curious about the transformation. You have witnessed since embracing the teachings of the ultimate coach book and engaging with the community. Could you maybe highlight a specific instance situation where these concepts are catalyzed in it a change in your perspective? Or, like, can you come up with an example of what it is? Like?

Yes, it's as if Okay, so So Steve Hardison says to look for a goal, and I lived in gold country in California. So if you look in gold and how they ask to find a claim, and you find a Zayn, and you strike the mother lode, and sometimes you're panning, and you only get small nuggets, and sometimes you get the mother lode, in all things, my perspective now is looking for the goal. And following that vein, and that read, right, but it's about changing my perspective and changing your perspective. It's about changing your vision, and your focus, because there is no focus or nothing without the other vision without focus is nothing. Focus without vision is nothing. And therapy. You see, it has really helped me energize those two things, in the way that I see the world and myself in the world because we say, you know, he said in the book, we don't see the world as it is, we see it as we are. And I was not able to see who I was or how I was until this group. And now I am undeniably standing in my truth. Now, the most monumental thing was Daniel Harner, teaching me about generational loving your ancestors and ailing your path. He's very, very good at that. And I'm, I had a major download in India in the lotus temple in New Delhi. That was very transformational. I don't know it was India or the book. It followed up with about a 10 or 15 minute conversation with Steve Hardison who called me I was on a taxi at the middle of the night, you know, because he's gonna call you doesn't care what time it is. And, and but he was watching me and he saw what I was becoming in India, and the role that I accepted and how the Indian people saw me and I saw it like a beautiful peony, it was a beautiful unfurling flower just keeps coming out on paper, beautiful, delicate gracefully. And I see that in myself, I see it in everybody taking chances and, and and take things that are possible in others as possible. And us, Wolfgang and Dave during the world, Minda Pacheco, selling everything to live in an attic in France, James Klein not renewing his least what is possible for them as possible for us. What is possible for me, it's possible for you, without judgment, or criticism or comparison, wearing the world have we ever felt this kind of community that somebody's not trying to judge you on your success or not trying to give you a hand up? Or a foothold? Right. It's just so much support in the strip, like being on a tight rope. And we're going to balance we're going to balance you know, that bar can go either way. And we got it. And if we follow those things, there's nothing to fear. If we fall we fall in the arms of compassion and loving non judgement. What is the beauty?

Isn't that beautiful? Yes. And you and I know you are very active in the community to you are in the the ultimate coach book reading moderators team. We were together you and I for the season three and now Season Four is coming. How are you feeling about that? How do you like it?

Oh, well, let's see if you took a bath in a in a bathtub full of seltzer water. How would you feel that's how I feel completely invigorated through my core. Let's powerful conversations. It's sacred space. It's community and created Think Tank King. I mean it this would be a dream job, wouldn't it? I mean, for our to sign up to that. I don't know. I would love it. I would love to get an income just from doing what I do. But I know that God's not at school and it says on money and God We Trust and so I do that right. But yes, I'm very active with the community River. I'm very active with the book reading and like I said, I do the connection. bingos, you know and it's whatever you choose to use the offer some nice things like the podcast or on LinkedIn, on Instagram. It's like going to a salad bar. You can choose whatever you want. Take a bike you don't like it scooters in the sides ebook really nourishes you. And it's like making an investment in yourself into a brass piggy bank. If you don't put anything in it, you're not going to hear any jingle jangle. It's the investment that you put into yourself. Because you are worth it. Yes, yeah. This is where you figure out how much you are worth and how much value you have. It's right here. I mean, it's like to Steve's like going into Thomas Cook Exchange Bank anywhere in the world and saying, Here's what I have, what can I get boring? They're like, Oh, two times as much five times as much your value here is exponential all look at that currency exchange of our spirit. Yes, yes, absolutely.

And, you know, it this being in this community also impacted my relationships with my loved ones people around me like my close people. So did how did you see that in your relationships with your, your own personal community?

Well, first of all, if we are all born whole and complete, nothing to fix or change, we need to look at everybody in the world like that. My cousin once also told me that God doesn't love us like we are the last ones on earth. He loves us like we're the only one year. And so we also need to love everybody like that, that they are also the only one here. No, I love but also by the premise that God has more faith in me than I have in him. And he's really good with that. So it's very, very easy to really be forgiving upon myself. Yeah, so there's a lot of little analogies and you know, things I get to, to incorporate this into my life. And love is all there is like the Beatles say, like everybody does. And so I see them with that. I see, I see them, however, I have to see them. If it's a difficult relationship, I might see them as if they've just been diagnosed with terminal illness. And every moment they have with them as precious, whatever mindset I have to get around. But it's really about love. And I am just scattering it around like fertilizer in a field. And I grew up where love was a weapon, and it was used as a bargaining chips. It wasn't given away freely. So this is something very, very new to me. And what I love about it is I realized, I love loving, I love loving you, I love loving everybody. I love loving me I love loving lives have become a very powerful, rare. Now, not not the power of prayer, the praying powerfully, which says shift in my life, I've learned that here. There's so much that I've incorporated but the people in my life, I have noticed the change there like you are different. There is no going back, we are standing out of your way you are onto something magnificent. It is coming from every corner of my of my environment that people are saying you are on that threshold. And I feel it, I feel it.

And I feel it too. And marry me. Like I could say that's the reason why I wanted you to be my guest. Because I have been watching you, I have been watching you how you have been blooming in this community. And I really wanted others to come across you and listen to you and listen to your passion and excitement. So that like because yours is so contagious. And it's, it's, you are so amazing. So I want more people to be aware of your amazingness. And when you go back to the book, The Ultimate coach book, when you think of parts that resonated the most with you? Did you have any aha moments that led to profound shifts, or I know the book is full of those, but is the one that is the most pronounced for you more more impactful for you that you can cheer

yet? Well currently I'm in the demolition phase. And I think that in that chapter is where he says burn it all down and there's no one coming to save you. And like I said, if God loves me like I'm the only one here than then I have all the strength and courage to manage this entire world all by myself. And all the beauty and abundance in the world and also for my taking. There's nobody else okay if you use that saying, now imagine on that alone in the world gone Disney and God but it's a deserted island somebody suddenly shows up. I'm watching you're gonna love that one person. You've been on a deserted island only you and your God you're gonna be so in love. Like, Hi, I'd love you to come see my island. Right? And so I realized that I'm an army of one in this world and often people feel this way but they feel like a private in the trenches like not knowing the uncertainty of war and who's Making these plans instead of taking charge of being the general in the air conditioned office with a topographical map making strategy and taking control of their lives. So if if war is a battlefield or even the song Love is a battlefield, what is your strategy? What's your vision? How can you be like, you know, I'm very much like Gandhi, like the, how he's able to be dead fast and his released without wishing any ill will on his oppressors. And so that's how I like to try to be but so I'm coming at life with the mindset of a general now, and that I'm in control. And this is my army, it's just me and God, he's my general, right. He's my commanding officer here, and I've got it, I've got it all under control. Beautiful, I create, I don't create it, I just spell it. Because there's another thing I also don't the bullet, faith and doubt cannot coexist. And so you must have one over the other one will negate the other. My daughter was an international snowboarding champion, who did not know how to snowboard when she began. And I would rather that, you know, your mountain is like a wave like a surfer, it doesn't matter. Every wave every mountain is yours. And if you have one drop of doubt, and you're an Olympic athlete, one drop down, you've lost any one of three metals district, you can come in fifth, seventh, but you are not taking on the gold, bronze or silver. That's it. And so I like to sit in the faith as much as possible. That's the place to be that's where creation happens. faith in yourself faith in your Creator. And knowing that the Creator has more faith in us than we have in whoever it is. I don't care if you have one god or 1001 God, as long as you have someone something

Yes, absolutely. And you know, it's not about even believing it's knowing, knowing or knowing, certainly being certain.

It's dynoing as a as a noun, not as a verb. So to be in then do a no sound thing is, is an action, but to be in the know, and have unknowing. That's a certain kind of clairvoyance called Claire cognise sets, and you don't have any stare, there is no doubt you just sit back, which is funny, because the other thing that I'm really looking at in the book is lean. And all you have to do is lean like on so in the threshold, it's just lean forward. That's how close it is

absolutely beautiful. I don't know if you have worked on your im statement, your document. But if you had, how has it been? How did it evolve over time? And also, could you share a couple of lines from it may be

yes, definitely. My document is a living, breathing thing, like a baby that I'm birthing, and it hasn't even learned how to walk yet. You know, just like I've been burping it and feeding it for a while it's been setting up all over the place. You know, it's a little messy right now, but I'm getting ground I'm getting my sweating with it. And one of the greatest ones I have is right at the beginning is I am a child of God, I an inmate in the image of my creator. And I am here to create because as a woman and as a especially as a woman, but as a human being we create a wall of things we can grasp the tree, you know, and whatever whatever God has created, He's given us the opportunity to create it here on Earth, heaven on earth as it is. It happened as a prayer says, right. And I was at a party once this is great. And my cousin's married to a movie producer from Hollywood. And I was in at home while I'm doing daycare, and somebody asked what I did. I said I was a producer. And they said, he gave me a dirty look. And I said, Well, I am a real producer. I make human beings so they're so see how you can create anything God creates. That's how easy it is to be. I love that one. That bedroom. Here's another one I am the vessel for universal wisdom and my wisdom brings peace of mind to me and everyone I meet. I am born to elevate others to a higher sense of themselves. I encouraged and confidence emulated. I am fearless because God tells me to fear not a healing light in the dark corners of your mind. I'm a good friend. I make exceptions, not excuses. The budget view of the things that I have. Yeah, I'm fun and laughter and when I went to India, I went to Gandhi's home and in his bedroom said My life is my message and said no matter how beautiful and shiny or dull and troubled your life is what Ever we've been served. It's an message. It's what you can make of that. Wow, what's your take of that?

Oh, beautiful My life is my message. Wow. So profound, really is, you know, when we, when we look at our lives, we are all in a journey of personal growth, right? And that sometimes become look like a roller coaster. So can you speak to any challenges you encountered while integrating the teachings from the book and the community into your life and coaching practice? Any things that you thought, Well, what about this? How, how could this happen? Or how could that happen better? What is your take on that?

You know, it's nasty. I just want to let everybody know that there are some people out there that make this personal development look really, really easy. And in the beginning, I used to equate it to like a yo, yo, you go you get up but then you go down, but you don't stay down as long because people are thinking, oh my god, it's all rainbows and butterflies, right? No, it's not it's rainstorms and cocoons. That's the only way you're gonna get rainbows and butterflies. If you go into Illinois, you go through the rainstorm. Do you can't get one without the other. Right. And when I first joined, I started doing lives very seriously around August or July last year with Eric law pounds challenges. And I was really raw and vulnerable. And those, I didn't realize the impact I was making. Once I was in such a state of despair. I just put the camera down and did a block video. And people were calling me from around the world as if please do not stop. I am doing my cardio to you people started saying I start my day with you. I look forward to you. I hear your voice. I stop in my tracks. It's your conviction of which you speak. I didn't realize the power of that. That's the power of i said of prayer. If I speak with the conviction here, and I'm saying it directly to God, he's bound to listen, and then people are gonna listen, and I'll listen. Right? So. Yeah, so I actually did one video where I cried for eight minutes long. nonstops not on my sleeve. That's how Robert calm and so I mean, people can go and look this stuff up. And another woman called Reach out to me and said, I would like to do a lie, but I'm scared. And I wrote, If you are scared, call me because I'm fearless. And as soon as that word came onto the screen, I realized I was a hypocrite. Because if I was fearless, I would be doing stand up comedy. And so that Wednesday, four days later, or three days later, I was on stage doing stand up comedy. I wrote nothing down. I fill myself with a spirit. And just like in the book, where Steve Hardison asks a woman just she says, I can't do that. Well, who would you have to be? He says, maybe who could do that? Maybe Julia Roberts. He goes a be that I went there and sat there and thought Steve Hardison would do this. He would sit here he wouldn't prepare. He would feel this confident. I am that he is me. It all we are a reflection no projects in theaters, mirrors, coaches, cheerleaders. It's phenomenal.

Oh, I really love this story. And Wow, congratulations for doing that. And you are so inspiring. And you did like what solo travel open water swimming. You have you have been to competition, about like mothers. Can you tell me about those years?

Yeah, I actually I train all year. So I'm in my 60s. And my father was a San Francisco based swimmer which is very cold that we used to win for his birthday. I became a cold water swimmer and I swim in alpine lake, which means they are fed by snow. And we still have snow in California. So water is in the 50s I swim the backstroke. And so I'm looking at Sky had no bearing who were the courses, I add my unnecessary mileage to my flan. But I'm filled with the beauty and the gratitude and the gold. This is in Gold Country. First of all, I'm looking at the clear blue skies, the Sierra mountains. And I get in a mindset but first, during the first 1/3 of the lab is oh my god, this is so cold. Why the heck am I doing it? And I bring on all my cheerleaders from this group. Everybody who sees me that I can do this or with me, I breathed the men. In Neil Walsh's book one of the conversations with God. He said every breath that's ever been exhaled in this world still exists in this world. You can easily inhale Jesus Christ as you can Hitler. And so it's what we've also added to That, who are we taking in? And what are we putting out? Well, here I am in the water. I've got half the TC gang with me as my cheerleaders. I'm swimming, you know, looking at the sky, I'm breathing Wolfgang's 509 breathing, I've got Dave Orton telling me you are a freaking goddess. Never forget it. You know. So I've got my coaches, my cheerleaders, everybody's with me when I do my swim, I am not alone. I just feel like a champion. I feel like a theme. Here. I am a team of one Arya one. And yet I'm surrounded, and I breathe in tea you see, all day long? All day long. It's gonna be somebody I never without to you see, it's like, it's like having eyeglasses, you would never forget your eyeglasses.

So powerful. Thank you for sharing all this, really? And you're right. You're never alone. You're always with us, all of us each and every one of us. So, thank you so much for this opportunity for being my guest today. And Marie. I'd love our listeners to connect with you. How can people connect with you and learn more about the work you're doing?

Yet? Well, currently, I'm primarily on Facebook, and I'm not on other social media things. I do prefer to connect one on one with connections. I have been hacked the dearly over the past. I'm not trying to take random friend requests on Facebook. But I do encourage anybody to direct message me we to do. And you know, just say, you know, amazing to see or from this podcast, and I will definitely reach out to use or powerful connection call. I am proud to leave people much better than I found them. At the very least you're going to have a very entertaining session with me because I did when San Francisco's funniest mother in America in 2009 for Nick and night television. So I am a stand up comedian. You know, so we're gonna have fun at the very least. I'm gonna have two websites coming out at the end of the year, which will I'll put on my Facebook, but primarily it will be Ann Marie O'Halloran dot com and my book, which is turning tragic into magic.com. And as I grow, and I come into that doorway, because I'm gonna land that threshold, all these other things will be, will be coming into play. I also invite anybody to travel with me, I say, I'm going to travel by yourself. I travel alone. I'm very experiential. You have to be with me. This will be with second thing is, that's who I am. You need to be with me. That's what I encourage. Most of all, if I'm traveling, you see me if you live close, I'll come I'm never too busy for anybody. Just like Mother Teresa that somebody asked her. Why do you help everybody because I help nobody. She didn't tell me to help you told me to love. I just love everything. She loves everybody. I don't choose anybody to love. I just love everybody and I make my I make myself very available to everybody. Because when I started this group, I was in the state of despair and darkness. And it was through the light that other people's held for me. Like candles, we are like candles on a birthday. Birthday cake in this world is our birthday cake. And when you go to Birmingham or India or another event, or even on a pot, as you know, and food is the anniversary or a 300 piece, people's zoom or something like that, it's like putting all the candles together in the middle of the and the headwinds can seem to shine because that's how bright we are.

Rural. Beautiful, what a beautiful closing to our conversation. Thank you so much. Thank you so much. And very first I'd

like to close with one comment I was discussing with Andrea Buspar last night and it was Carol Metz made a comment to me about the B commitment he she said You are commitment with lowercase d and Marie How are you going to be commitment was an uppercase the and I don't care whether you're talking about commitment, safe integrity, whatever you're trying to up your game. Imagine your your keyboard of your computer. All it takes is the shift key that says use the Shift key. Bring yourself into a higher level, put in all caps, and now you have something to capitalize on. And that thing is you best asset you'll ever own.

Wow, I have chills hearing this. And Mary, thank you for sharing your gift with us in our conversation and the way you show up in the world. You've been a gift to our community and our listeners today. So thank you for who you are being

Thank you back for seeing me and recognize your being thank you for inviting me here. I love you that Almighty with all my heart I say don't love us on the bottom My heart is absolute bad neighborhood. Yeah with all.

I love it too AnneMarie, thank you. Thank you

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