Mind Management as A Path to Freedom - Lisa Kneller

TUCP Intro/Outro: Thank you for tuning in to The Ultimate Coach Oodcast, a companion to the transformative book, The Ultimate coach, written by Amy Hardison, and Alan D. Thompson. Each conversation is designed to be a powerful wake up call, reminding us of what's possible for you and your life. So if you're on a journey to expand your state of being, this podcast is for you.

Hello, everyone. Welcome back to The Ultimate Coach podcast. I'm your host, Ipek Williamson, and today I'm absolutely delighted to have Lisa Kneller

Thank you so much, Deepak. I'm super honored to be here. And of course, it's our little reunion for the two of us. So I always loved that. So thank you for having me.

It is indeed fantastic to have you here. You have reinvented yourself several times. So my first question to you will be what inspired you to get into life coaching.

It's quite a story. I mean, I, I really, this came to me kind of recently that my first coach was yoga. That was my first coach. And that was over 20 years ago when I started practicing yoga. So I've been doing Mind Body Spirit work for a very long time, over 20 years. And as I was a stay at home mom as I was teaching yoga, but then I'm stayed home longer than most moms do. And it wasn't until I was 59 years old that I went back to work, I actually got a full time job. And I was working as an enrollment counselor at Grand Canyon University. And I enrolled people in online degree programs. So I loved and be higher education pF, I love being involved in higher education. And as a benefit of being an employee, we were able to take some courses. And I wasn't at the phase of life where I wanted an MBA or anything like that. So I there was a graduate certificate of completion and life coaching in the Psychology program. So I took that it was about a 10 month program. And when I told people I was doing that they were like, oh, yeah, that's right up your alley, you know. So it's all like they're really good sets. And that was an academic piece. And then after that, I realized I need more. And so that's where I got into this certification program with you. So that's kind of what did it.

But as you said, alongside your coaching, you are also a yoga teacher. Right? And also, there is one more thing that brings us together. You are a fellow teacher on Insight Timer.

Yes.

How do these roles complement your life coaching practice? And what unique perspectives do they bring to your work? Like being an Insight Timer teacher and also being a yoga teacher? What are the pluses benefits that bring to your coaching practice?

That's a great question. I have always been fascinated by sought work. I thought, having studied yoga. So I studied yoga and taught yoga for a long time before I got into coaching, right. So I was intrigued by by the thought work I learned in yoga and yet 20 years later, I realized there's more there's more thought work to be done. And even though in yoga we practice certain things like man and you know, regulating our bras and managing our minds as we're in poses and things like that and learning to like cope and oppose. Those things have helped me and shaped me to become a coach and they say They'll do now I don't teach on Insight Timer, a whole lot I, I'd like to teach more. But I'm dealing with some of my own physical challenges right now that I'm working on. Like I have hip issues right now. And so I'm working with physical therapy to loosen that up and to feel better. So that I feel like teaching more. I don't know if that answers your question. But I see that the two inform each other. Yeah. So does that answer your question? Yes.

And while I was asking you, I was thinking, I think it brings a more holistic approach to your coaching, because you have different solutions to your client's problems may be or through your God through meditation through anything that might complement your coaching skills.

That's a good point. So I might really, because you know, how clients can can come, they can present very stressed out, they're moving quickly, and all that. So yeah, I do have the ability to help them slow down. We focus on somatic work, also, like just just some breathing. And, you know, maybe we'll bring some oils into it just to feel better, you know, to get to get grounded. So yeah, it has helped in that way. And I think that grounding, I think it's appreciated by the clients that I really do.

For sure, I'm sure they do. During our call earlier, you mentioned mind management, I mean, by earlier call the call that we had before. And I am quite intrigued by that topic, mind management, it can you a little bit elaborate on its meaning and what it entails, maybe,

yes, it because it's my favorite subject, okay, so our seeking really stimulates our feelings, and then our feelings stimulates our action. And often times, we don't make good decisions based on our thinking and feeling. And, and oftentimes our thinking is erroneous. And you know, the definition of yoga is to direct and focus mental activity. That's the goal of yoga. And a lot of people think is doing poses and pretzel pose, and all that kind of stuff. And I think a lot of people know that it is a mind body spirit practice, but the primary goal is to direct and focus mental activity. And that is a practice, that is not easy. So first, we have to come to an awareness. Sometimes that awareness comes to us through a life event, or through reading or personal development or something like that. But the thoughts just keep coming. They don't even if you get good at it, they still come. And you still have to notice them and make a decision whether or not you want to run with them or not. And so it is a constant vigilance of your mind. And because the nature of the mind is to just kind of chatter, right? You know, this, but a lot of people don't. And even if they do get a glimpse of that, it still takes, I would say years of practice to get to get really good at witnessing your own thoughts and didn't make any decisions, like even knowing you can change your thoughts, even knowing that you can decide is very cool to me.

You're making a very good point here, Lisa. It is very aligned with what I say about coaching. Because in my opinion, coaching, the main goal of coaching is raising the awareness of the client. And I see that what you are telling about my management seems like raising the other person's awareness around their thought patterns, their perspectives and how they think, being mindful of their thoughts and noticing them as they come. Am I right? Yes. Yes, absolutely. One other thing that caught my attention. You say in your website, I believe. You talk about self coaching. Yeah. What is that? Would you please share what self coaching is? It is very, it might be very interesting to many people in our audience.

I'm so glad you asked that because I was just thinking about it this morning. I used to be a member of self coaching scholars, which is a Brooke Castillo program. And it's all about learning how to coach yourself. If Well, coaching yourself really comes after being coached, I mean, you have to learn the skills of this mind management piece to be able to coach yourself. But it's so possible we can all do it. And we can all do it even I can even do it better than I'm doing it now, you know, but and I'm fairly good at it. But I'm there's always more, there's always more. Yeah, yeah. So I think that once, you know, we coach someone, let's say it's six months, let's say it's a year, some people wanted a longer 18 months, two years. But after that, they're developing some self coaching skills. Wouldn't you agree?

Absolutely. Absolutely. It's becomes a part of life. Maybe?

Yeah, it's a skill. It's definitely a skill.

And I want to now talk about the art of being a little bit. Oh, it's very much aligned with our being movement, and the essence of this podcast, right. But before getting to art of being could you first tell us about your first connection with the ultimate coach community and the being moment, Lisa,

Of course, and Matt goes back as far as you go back, probably because we were in the same coaching program. And we saw a video of Steve Hardison doing the TBF LOL, whatever that thing is. The story about Deus lottery, I think, yeah, shortly after that, and then this is going back to 2020. So shortly after that, I received an invitation to read the manuscript of the ultimate coach. I don't know if you did that. But somehow I got that manuscript and the steam got a hold of me, I guess, maybe even through Facebook or something. But he said, If you promise not to share this with anyone, I will give it to you the the manuscript, but then I want you to throw it away. And I said, Okay, I'll read it. And I read it. And I got rid of it, like I promised. And that was before the book was published. So then, of course, the book was published. And then the ultimate coach experience happened out here in Arizona, I think it was Chandler. And I went with Colleen Bosque, she came out here, we went together. And we had a really good time. And I met Steve and Amy. And the other guy that wrote the book. Alan, we met Alan and yeah, and at that same time, I got introduced to Eric law film. And that's a whole other story. Because now Eric is my coach, and unconscious youth coach and Stevens on crushes coach life, like I'm in this lineage of coaches, which I'm like, Oh, my God, I can't even believe I can't even believe who I need coach by right now.

Yes. Well, then, can you also tell us a little bit about what is art of being for you? But does that mean to you? Yes.

Okay, I'm going to address the couple of the questions and the book, the back cover and or the inside cover. So there are a few questions who like, who am I being as a leader? Who would I need to be to alter my relationship with fear? And who do I need to be to be a more loving parents, spouse, whatever. And I love those questions. And then Eric loss home started a group, speakers group for the or being, you didn't call it the art of being I call it he started this group, and I got intrigued by it. And I thought, You know what, I, I actually can speak on that. And it all comes from having read the book, of course, all those types of questions, and also creating a declaration of who we are. Right? So one of the things that Eric taught me was that being with that we're always being so there were three distinctions. He talked about work, we're always being, and we can observe our being and we can shift our being. That's thought management. That's mine management.

It's so aligned with what you do, right? Mind management.

Yeah, it just, it just fit the well. So the art of being is learning. First of all, it is really expanding your vision of who you believe you are. That's the first thing. But in order to expand the vision of who you think you are you, it helps to have some exposure to that. To have someone say, guess what, you're more than who you think you are. And here's some adjectives that might describe you. Right? And then you can share those attributes and then people can either be like, I resonate with that, or I don't read Nate with that? Do I want to be this? You know, like, let's say I say I'm, I'm a loving person. And someone might not think they're a loving person, or they just haven't thought about it, you know? And then they might ask themselves, am I loving? I want to be loving, what could I do to be more loving? You know, those kinds of things. So instead, I don't know, it's just

a chain of reaction kind of thing, right? Starting to think about yourself, if I'm not that, how can I get there?

Yes, yes. And it's a choice.

Absolutely. So this is a very good way of coming close to this question that I was going to ask you anyway, which I asked to everyone coming to this podcast, because you mentioned already the questions in the back end, the front of the book. So which one of the questions from those lists is the one you need to focus on at this moment in time in your life, you think?

I'm gonna go with you? Who would I need to be to alter my relationship with spear? Because I think, you know, I'm a pretty confident person. You've known me a long time, I think you're a very confident person as well. But we all have fear. There's always some fear of am I gonna bother this person? Am I gonna say something on Facebook? That's annoying, or, you know, there's just, am I not? Am I serving in the appropriate way? Am I gonna make a big mistake? And if I make those mistakes, how's that going to affect my wife? You know, so I think, as confident as I am, I know I have underlying fears. And so that's, that's the one I'm gonna, that I would go with.

Yeah, that's a good one. Because fear is a part of us, even though we tried to erase it from our lives, from time to time, it comes in shows itself. And we are human beings. So it happens. But being mindful and trying to be more on top of things is always helpful, of course. So now, this brings us to my three rapid fire questions. Are you ready?

I think so. Okay.

The first one is your favorite meal. So if you could eat only one meal for the rest of your life? What would it be?

Oh, my gosh, probably. And it's I'm particular about this, but it could be pizza. I was gonna say Stammen, you know, the healthy thing, but a really thin crust, Crispy Pizza with onions, Stockbridge and green peppers.

That's a good one. And it's so interesting that the while I was asking you the question, I the word pizza came to my mind. And you said pizza is so interesting. Okay, the second question, life lesson. What's the most important lesson you learned so far?

Starting when? I had a big lesson in high school. How about I share that one? Of course. I was a cheerleader in junior high school. I didn't make cheerleading my freshman year of high school. But my sophomore year, I made it because I worked my tail off. I hung out with my girlfriends who are cheerleaders, I worked out with them, even though they were practicing cheer for their stuff. I was up in the same what we would call the dance room or the gym room. And I would be working on my splits and my jumps and all the things and so sophomore year, I made cheerleading, and then I made it again, junior year. But junior year, I was really slacking off. And I was I mean smoking cigarettes on the side of the school, and my grades dropped and all this stuff. And so when it came time for cheerleading tryouts for senior year, I did not make it because you had to have teacher evaluations in order to you know, there's a score that goes into your score of your tryouts. So I did not make it that first half of the senior year. Lucky for me, that was the first year they decided to split the football cheerleaders and the basketball cheerleaders. So football was fall and basketball was winter. So I had another opportunity to clean up my axe. And one of the gals dropped out of the group. And when tryouts came, I made it for the second half of my senior year. So I just knew then I learned it was a big lesson. Don't slack off. If you want something, you know, you can't. You can't have certain things if you live a certain way. I guess it's what there's a consequence to everything. And my husband and I always like to joke, this is the way the world works, you know, and they could leave it.

This is a beautiful, thank you so much for sharing this. And it also tells us that you can always recover and make up for your mistakes. And continue. Thank you for sharing that. And the third question, I have your bucket list destination, if you could travel anywhere in the world right now. Where would you go?

Do I have to pick one country? Are?

Whatever comes first? To your mind? Europe?

I want to see more of Europe. I'd like to Yeah. Yeah, I'd like you to

You can jump in a train in Europe and go around all countries, one after the other. Also, there are river cruises that I really like. I think we should arrange one of those and go for it sometime. Yeah,

let's do it back. Maybe an idea coaching cruise,

Isn't it? Wouldn't it be lovely? It would be fun? Yeah. Well, Lisa, before we conclude this great episode, I know many of our listeners would love to dive deeper into your offerings like mine management, South coaching, or possibly seek your guidance. What are the best ways for them to connect with you and engage with the impactful work you're doing?

Well, I do have a website and that is LisaKneller.coaching.com. Lisa Kneller

Oh, lovely. I will definitely check it out. Lisa, thank you so much for joining us and sharing your stories today. It's really inspiring to see how you've navigated through so many changes, and helped others do the same. For everyone listening. If you want to connect with Lisa or check out her work. We've got all her links in the episode description. Thank you everyone for tuning into the ultimate coach podcast. Just a reminder, it's never too late to change things up and find a new passion in your life. Make sure to join us next time for more great talks that are sure to inspire and get you thinking, Lisa, it's been wonderful having you and I can't wait to see what you do next. Until our next episode. Keep embracing life's adventures. Thank you, Lisa.

Thank you so much Ipek. It's such an honor, really appreciate it.

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