EP47: 3 Keys to Create New Results with Stacey Berger

This is winning with wellness, a podcast about inspiring the wellness warrior in you. If you're feeling lost or alone in your wellness journey, or looking for new ideas and inspiration, you are in the right place, a place you can learn about all things wellness, in business life and living your host Jenny Ryce, we'll be bringing you inspiring stories and practical tools to improve your overall wellness personally and professionally. Imagine what living a life of wellness would be like. Thank you for joining us today.

Hi, everyone, welcome back to another episode of winning with wellness. I am very excited to introduce you to Stacey Berger, we are going to have a really wicked conversation around wellness today. Welcome aboard, Stacey. Yay. I'm going to share with everybody a little bit about your background. And then let's get into it. How's that sound?

Sounds great. Looking forward to awesome.

So you guys, Stacey has a proven system to turning your dreams into reality. Who doesn't want that? From her 20 plus years working with transformational principles, Stacy sees it working in her own life as well as her clients lives. And she would love to show you how to do the same in yours. So we are going to tap into this like actual passion, belief system style tools that you dig into in your daily life as well as with your clients. Stacy, tell me, tell me tell me tell me this is such a good question. How do people turn their dreams into reality?

It's, you know, million dollar question in so many ways. And it feels so obscure, because it's not something we've been trained in. And the truth is just like there's laws of electricity, there's laws of mathematics, there's laws of aerodynamics, when we understand those laws, electricity, always the existed, we didn't create electricity, we learned how to harness the laws of electricity to create light. And just like those invisible laws, we have invisible laws that govern transformation. Now that was a whole lot right there.

It was so juicy. Okay, so yeah.

Like you would go to a master electrician, right? If you wanted electricity and you wanted light in your home people come to me when they want results, because I understand the invisible laws of transformation. And how do we turn a dream, an idea from a thought into our actual life, and there is a proven repeatable, predictable system, that when we follow it, we are guaranteed to create results. And that's pretty exciting to me.

So there are people listening right now that are like, Oh my gosh, I didn't even know that was possible. How did you uncover or discover these these secret laws or these these hidden laws,

I would call myself I was an unconscious competent for many years goddess. So what that means as I was creating results in my life, not perfect by any means. But I was creating results inside of my life. And there was a moment in time and I'll tell you quickly, what was going on in my life. I'm a high achiever, right? So I set goals, like go after them, I achieved them. And my husband and I had been married for about a year, and we were ready to start a family. And so here's another goal, ready to check it off. And that's not the way it went. And six months went by and a year went by in a year and a half and two years and almost three years. And in that three years, I'm looking around going what's wrong with me? What's wrong with my husband? Why isn't this happening? Maybe I'm not meant to be all the inner dialogue. And through a series of serendipitous events, we were introduced to a course and we signed up for this course we attended it together. And on the first day they said okay, what would your home run be by means of taking this class? And the number one on both of our list was to start a family and they taught us in the class that our thoughts create a reality and I feel like I knew that you know, I was a positive person. I understood that I was responsible for my own words like I understood it at a certain level. But that night something shifted and I realize that for the last almost three years, I had been focused on what I didn't want. What's wrong with me? Why isn't this happening? What's wrong with Jeff? Everyone else is pregnant? What? Why not? Not not? And that night, Jenny, I shifted back to why did I want to be a mom, where I could feel the holding this baby and hear the words mom, and the little pitter patter of little feet on Christmas morning, and, and I shifted, the only thing that changed was me. And within just three weeks, we were pregnant. On can you remember? That caught my attention? What?

Like the universe to buy for, hey,

yeah, and so it it woke me up like there's something here. And that was in 2008. And I have dedicated my life to uncovering the the success formula and what happened. And now I can look with mathematical precision. Oh, that's why that worked. Oh, that's why that didn't work. That's why that person is able to generate success. That's why that person is struggling. And it's it's beautiful in its precision. But it's not something we've been taught. And so since 2008, I've really dedicated my own life to the study, and in supporting other people to really understand just like a master electrician understands the laws of electricity, the love the invisible laws of success.

When would you say to so many of us hear this manifestation word and you know, you know, create your own reality. And again, our thoughts become our things. And it's so interesting, through your own experience and discovery, realizing that you were working against your own mission and your own vision for your family, talk about a powerful aha moment. And then an affirmation of the shift and change to you know, find yourself blessed with, you know, with pregnancy and with it with a child. So, when you think about right now, I know we have somebody listening, who's thinking to themselves, I don't know that I can fully step into taking this path. Or maybe they're a skeptic, maybe they're nervous, what would be some suggestions you can provide to the listener that they can maybe start doing at home to start test driving this theory to see to see what it feels like for them to try it on?

Yeah, great question. And let me just say, you know, positive thinking isn't enough. And I think sometimes we tend to shame ourselves or beat ourselves up, well, I'm just not thinking positive enough. And there's, there's a whole system that we need to apply right, in order to create those results. So it's not just about affirmations, it's not just about positive thinking. Those are very important. And they're a key component. But there's a whole system, just like wiring your house, there's multiple steps required to create that end result. But one of the first places that I always encourage people to start is by having that crystal clear vision. Because in the absence of knowing what it is that you want to create, we're simply just reacting to our circumstances around us. And the more clear we are on what it is that we want to create, we start to see opportunities and resources show up for us that that we otherwise would have missed. And in saying, What do you want learn from my mistake where it was, well, I want to be a mom, that was the original vision. But my thought pattern wasn't a match to that. My thought pattern was the app essence of what I wanted. And most people set their goals and their visions based on what they don't want. I want to get out of debt, I want to lose the weight, I don't want to be alone anymore. I don't want to do this job anymore. And hurt. We're talking and we're giving energy to what we don't want to create. So if this is like piqued your interest, the first place that we start is asking ourselves the question, well, what would you love, and starting to build that image of you living results that you would love to create?

I love that. And you know, it's very interesting, because in society, we really are conditioned to move to the dark side. You know, yeah, it's just, it's just the way you know, between our inundation with social media and news, etc, etc. It's never in celebration of, of that positive reinforcement way of thinking.

The fascinating part about it is it's actually the way our brains are designed. So it's, it's our brains are designed to look for fear, to look for danger to keep us safe and so on. Again, when we're beating ourselves up about not being able to think positive, if you're, it's, it's the way you were built. So not to write it, it really is primal. But if we're not awake and aware of that, it dominates. And so the good news is we can consciously change that. But to your point, it's reinforced. We live in a negative, you know, call it a, we have an atmosphere, but there's also a thought Miss sphere. And the thought Miss fear on this globe, is usually one of negative negativity, of scarcity of lack of fear. So that gets reinforced in us over and over again. And it's why we, you know, when we meet each other in the elevator, we complain about the weather, right? We connect on what's going wrong, typically, rather than what's going right. But we can change that. That's the good news.

And when you think of somebody that is caught in the cycle, let's say of the negative, or that they find themselves much like you did for those three years, landing in a place that they don't how, how do you remind people to shift? Or what tools can you provide them to shift out? So they're clear on their vision, but they haven't quite stepped into the the energy piece of owning it in a way that they're really trying to attract? Because we both know, and I'm blessed to be passionate about the work that you do as well, we know that we attract what we put out, and you weren't attracting your vinyl goals. So how do we encourage the people listening to step beyond where they are, even though their vision might be positive? Their responses are?

Yeah, it's so fascinating. Because if you would have asked me for those three years, I would have told you, I'm a positive person, I'm thinking good thoughts, I didn't even have the awareness that that's what I was thinking. And that the power of that is to know that if you're not producing the results you want, it really is an opportunity for self reflection and honesty with yourself about, okay, if I'm not producing this result, what have my dominant thought patterns been. And I have client after client, where I'll calibrate their vision for them, which means they'll write a vision, and we'll go through and we'll read it, and we'll rewrite it. And it's amazing how subconsciously, there's so much of what we don't want that comes out. So my point of this is, it's really tough to see our blind spots, and having somebody else if it's a coach or a mentor, to mirror to you, hey, you probably can't see this for yourself. But here's what I'm hearing. That's really important. But the what we can do on our own is to recognize that we have something within us called metacognition. In Buddhism, they call it our observer, self, it's our ability to be aware of the thoughts we're thinking. And most people on this planet aren't even aware, to know that I can think my own thoughts. We're simply reacting and responding to the world around us. We wake up thinking the same thoughts that we woke up yesterday thinking or that our parents were thinking when we were kids, it's just programmed in us. So to make a conscious effort to tap into that metacognition, and the way that we do that is by noticing what I'm noticing starting to be more aware of what's coming out of your mouth, your words are a window into your thoughts, and just really starting to pay attention and notice if the thoughts are expansive, or contractive. And we know that based on how we feel when I think this thought do I feel lit up or do I feel down and you just start to pay attention to how your words and your thoughts make you feel, and it's a powerful indicator about the results that you are going to create and this is why your vision is so important because it gives you a place to think from

the moral compass I like to call it our guiding light our North Star because when we're very clear on our vision, it's it guides us back to all of that that's our you know, that's where we are. And I love what you're sharing for people to really notice. We forget sometimes because we are so busy and we are inundated with so many messages and and again that many of us forget that we have choice listen to what our body saying exactly that if if what we're feeling hearing, seeing reading doesn't lift us up. If it makes us feel Anything other than joy, chances are, it's not bringing in the message that we want to receive. And I love that you said it so beautifully. So thank you so much for sharing that with everybody. Now, you also shared with me, which I love, and you shared already with the audience, it wasn't always this way for you What led you to this work outside that? You know, you had a massive transformation and an understanding. And what drew you to that that course, like what brought you to this place in time?

Oh, it was, it was a longing it was. And I'm sure people are listening to this, because there's this sense of there's got to be more to life than this. And, you know, I believe that. And I know that we are meant to expand, we're meant to grow. And so it was, you know, I'm a seeker and I imagine most of this audience were seekers, we're looking to better understand ourselves. And sometimes that first starts with, I want to do different work in the world, or I want more money, or I want a nicer home, like, that's often where it starts is in the material world, which is great. We live in a material world. And usually, underneath that, there's a self discovery that occurs, you know, I got brought to doing this work full time. So that was 2008. And I didn't start my company until 2014. And that desire really came, I had climbed the corporate ladder, I was in an executive position, doing work that I love that lit me up for a long time. But there came a time where I just felt like I was meant for more, you know, young family now. So we went from no kids to three kids, and I wanted to be there for them in a different way and have more freedom and make more impact. And again, that just got me looking at what's next. And how can I bring my love of personal development and transformation in a bigger way to the world. And again, through a series of decisions, and not always easy, Jenny right to I was the breadwinner for my family. My husband's a stay at home dad and I made the decision to leave a corporate job to start a business. And it was a bold decision. But I am so grateful to the version of me that said yes to that, because my life is so enriched because of

it. When you know, I'm so thrilled that you shared that part. Because fear can hold us in places we don't belong anymore. For too long. And the fact that you had the courage to take that big leap, knowing you had those external pressures of being the provider and the financial provider, I want to be clear, obviously, your husband was definitely providing in different ways as well. But he can hold you hostage in the situation that you're in. So I admire your courage for stepping in to that. Your purpose.

Yeah, and not in the absence of fear, that's for sure. And, and I like to share, you know, I it took me about two years to finally make that decision. And in those two years, I was waiting for it to be more convenient. And I was waiting it for it to be more comfortable. Yeah, and convenience and comfort. They just never show up when we're pursuing that vision. And there was there was a lot of fear and and I think for your listeners to to understand that fear, often disguises itself as practicality. So fear is not always the big bad wolf energy or it's, you know, like, I'm going to do this, you know, mine was when the kids are older, when the mortgage is paid down when you know, this is impractical. And so to be able to discern where we think we're being practical, we're being realistic, we're being smart. And oftentimes, that's just a another way that fear is holding us back, which is so fascinating.

I love to call it denial. It's like I'm just going to you know, justify myself out of out of having to take that leap or, you know, I was in the same position when I was looking at taking over and stepping into your holistic earth that was there were many moments where I was like, well, this isn't the right time, all the things I I deeply remember those decisions and then standing in that moment and saying no, I'm going for it. This is what I'm supposed to do and haven't looked back thankfully haven't like you I can't say it was it's been 100% of smooth ride, but it's been the right decision the whole time.

And it's not always the you know, I'm not inviting anybody to give their notice and leave their job today. But sometimes it's putting your profile on that dating website. It's getting to the gym after decades of not being there. It's right there. It's There's all sorts of things when we're moving forward, it's whatever your step to take is. There's no comparison when it comes to that fear of what it's your step towards your path, but just to know that fear will always be present. And it's the it's the courage to do it anyways.

Well, and you share it at the beginning of our time together, and it's so true fear, you know, our natural primal response is to analyze fear, join me to freeze, do I need to run fight? Or do I need to fight? And many times when it comes to decision making, you know, we're not having a lot of that fight process anymore. Because really, there's not a lot of primal things that are trying to take us down. However, the response is still the same. So it can be extremely fearful making that type of decision and honoring that and seeing it for what it is. And is it true? Is it serving you in this time? And honoring the fact that it's okay to have those feelings and discern, like you said, if, if now's the time? And are you again, I love that you share that because I've done the same thing, I can justify the heck out of anything when it comes? Oh, no, this is not the right time.

I would I think it's so important. You know, our life may not be on the line as far as the saber toothed Tiger anymore. But your life is absolutely on the line. Because the biggest regret people have on their deathbed is the things they didn't do. And so when we can associate if I don't do this, there's a cost to that. They're like, don't take this step. What does that trajectory look like? And is that what I really want for myself? And so, you know, sometimes we need to dial up that, okay, my life really is on the line here if I don't do this, and that's a great way to get ourselves to take action.

Yeah, the the, the biggest thing we need to remember as human beings, and you know, I share this often, we are blessed with choice. And we're actually blessed with an expiry date that we don't know when it comes. Yeah. So we want to live every single moment to the fullest of our capabilities. And step in to step in. I think that's so amazing. So Stacy, when you think about what you know, now, and the wisdom you've developed, when you think of a younger version of yourself, what is one piece of advice would you give yourself as a younger version of you?

Great question. I would give myself so I entered the corporate world really young. And I climbed it pretty quickly. So I was a young female inside of that. And one of my coping mechanisms was the kind of the shield right? Like, you got to look like you got it all figured out. And there was a lacking of vulnerability. And I would say authenticity, right? That, you know, I'm really proud of what I accomplished. But knowing what I know, I couldn't have done it any differently. But knowing what I know now, I wish I would have just leaned into more of that intuitive authenticity while climbing that and you know, what, that may not even have been available to me. That right, it all works out perfectly. But to be able to know that now for myself, I think that's why we asked that question. Right? Am I being my authentic, vulnerable self? Now? It's a great question.

Well, in you know, this is the thing hindsight they say right. Now, we're, I can't believe how fast this time goes together in our conversation. Is there a question that I haven't asked you yet that you would love to make sure that the audience knows.

I would love the audience to know that you are capable of so much more than you are aware of. And sometimes it can be tough to see that that deserving that capacity within ourselves. So go surround yourself with people who can know that for you. But no, it's it's absolutely true. And like we started this conversation, just like there are laws of electricity. There are laws of transformation. So anything that you're dreaming about it is absolutely possible, absolutely possible.

And what's amazing, and I hope those are Have you that are listening really hear that to the core, it's not always about knowing the pathway. So knowing about how to get there, you just have to believe it's possible. And then you can start moving into action putting one step forward. So Tracy, I just the one thing I want to talk about really quick is you are providing a free workshop, it's not correct, you have access to a free workshop.

So I have, what I would love to offer this group is if you are interested in having some support to really discover what that vision is, understand what's been holding you back, right, I couldn't see what was holding me back, I needed somebody else to point that out to me. And really begin to understand what that system is, I would love to offer a complimentary conversation with somebody from my team, where we'll spend 45 minutes with you really unpacking that vision and what your best next step is so powerful time and can be truly life changing.

Hey, that's so incredibly generous. So anybody out there that's feeling like you guys can't step into this or you're not sure where to begin. Take Stacy and her team up on this offer you guys, the connection will be all laid out in the show notes. So don't worry, we'll make sure you can connect with her there. And also Stacy is an incredible member of your holistic Earth. If for some reason you can't find the information on the show notes, all you have to do is go over to your holistic Earth, insert, search up Stacey in the directory and she'll pop up and you'll be able to access her and find how to reach her through there. So Stacy, any final notes that you want to share before we sign off today?

Oh, this has been great, Jenny, thank you for the good work you're doing in the world and for having me and it really is a privilege. Oh,