A New Lens On Love With Dr. Tricia Rose

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I'm Kerry Brett, and this is Shot@Love. The first motivational show around online dating. Do you have a clear vision about your future today's guest is optometrist dr. Tricia Rose, and she's going to help us remove barriers so we can unlock our full potential. Her story is fascinating and inspiring, and she's going to leave us feeling like we have a new lens unlike you won't want to miss it. So stay tuned.

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Dodger. Trisha Rose is the founder of envisioned Boston giving and the previous owner of the envision Boston optometry practice envision Boston giving was a philanthropy program founded by dr. Trisha Rose in partnership with the Boston public schools and the mayor's education task force. The mission was providing free screenings and eye glasses to children in need. Dr. Rose provided screening clinics in the Boston public schools for over a thousand children, giving them the ability to see the world more clearly and without further ado, dr. Tricia Rose. Hi Tricia. Thanks for being here. Hi, Carrie Trisha is in the hot seat today and someone who's done such magnificent big things. She is a very humble person. So for me, forcing her to come on the show today to take her out of her comfort zone. So I'm happy that you're here and we're going to have a great episode, and I want to give you guys a little background about this fabulous campaign that we created together. And that's how we first met and how we had started this friendship. So just picture this little, um, Reese Witherspoon, lookalike, who comes bouncing into my studio with a numerous pairs of glasses. And she's like, this is so fun. And I didn't even know her. And I did photograph her. I take her headshot and she said, you know, I really wanted to do something with children and I want to do something charitable with my practice. And I didn't have glasses at the time. And I'm always up for doing something charitable, but she said, maybe I should hire you to photograph maybe models wearing my eyeglass wear. And I thought, Hmm, you know what? I have an idea. What if we got some well known celebrities and influencers and photograph them in your eyeglasses long story? The shorter version is I should have asked Matt Damon because every person that we asked agreed to do it. And they were right on board because it was for children. So every visionary who was photographed by me for the campaign, a full day of service was given to a school. And so everyone was like, yes. And that was truly the most rewarding job I think I've ever done. Don't you feel that way? I do. I do. And I felt like it really represents the, the deep philanthropic spirit

Of the Boston community. And that was also the impetus too for doing this program is I've moved here and bought up the practice downtown. And I could not believe just the quality and loveliness of my clients, and I wanted to do something to give back, but never in my wildest dreams. Did I think that we would be able to pull this off and get all of these incredible Bostonians to just volunteer outright their time and their images to support such a meaningful purpose.

It was pretty incredible, but that's Boston Bostonians. We are Boston strong and we stick up for each other. We don't leave. We never leave. You know,

It's very true. It's like very, very special. And I learned so much through that campaign and I don't think it'll ever, I can never imagine being part of a more beautiful city.

It was, it was really amazing. And so I photographed this campaign and I really am proud of all of my work and in some of the best worker I ever, I felt I ever did photographically. And at the end of the campaign, you're like, you can't really see Carrie. And I don't really know. I thank God for auto-focus. Um, but it was amazing because at the end I truthfully needed glasses even as a child. And I finally got a pair of glasses and my whole life opened up and changed. So when I was able to be in those schools, volunteering with you and seeing these little sweet cherub faces that never would have the opportunity for a screening. And then when we ever would give them the glasses and they put them on their faces and that happiness, I mean, I would like be losing sleep at night, thinking about how quick can we get the glasses to the kids after the screening? You know, it really bothered me that these children couldn't see and that impacted their schooling and everything and poor families just couldn't afford it. So it was really something very special. And to frame it back for dating, you were a single mom and you picked up and you moved all by herself with your daughter, which is incredible, bought this and built this huge practice in downtown Boston. That, that took a lot to do that. And I admire you to move to a new city. I mean, I've, I've never left the town that I grew up.

Thank you. You know, that was actually like a deeper calling. Um, I had a different practice in the Syracuse area for, um, eight years. I was taking care of nursing home patients, and it was really perfect for me at the time because I was a single mom and I needed to be home. And it was like, I had great schedule and I really enjoyed that work too. But in my heart, I knew I wanted to live in a big city and I wanted like an urban practice where there's a lot of hustle and bustle. And I actually was hoping for New York, but then this opportunity up in Boston and I just went for it and it was, I never looked back. I mean, it was just an incredible eight years of owning that business downtown.

Right. And I think you do have that attitude of you have this trust and this faith, and you do just go for it. And that's one of your strengths. I think that's a, like a winner mindset. And when we do that inner work on ourselves, it all starts in the mind. And I want to talk about your mindset and where you were when we were working on the campaign before you married your husband. The way I look at you at this time was you were using this time of being single as an opportunity to create a new life that you wanted. And so do you want to talk about how you were mastering this flow of energy and relying on the feeling of being expansive, trusting, hopeful, and then also giving, giving back with the campaign?

Yes. And that's so interesting that you say these things, because when I look back at that time, it was a very different emotional, um, I was in a very different emotional state because I was so focused and so purposeful in what I wanted to do. And I feel like giving back in any way you can. And for me, I wanted to give back with my skills with my optometry skills and my access to frames, and my team could support my mission, but it put me in a totally different head space where I wasn't even thinking about my like little me like, Oh, you know, I'm not married or I don't have a boyfriend, or, you know, I was just focused on this higher ground of being part of something bigger than myself and making a bigger impact in helping, like you said, these little, these students who are so deserving of everything. And I was like, I was in a totally different mental space when I was doing that practice. And it was really, really high vibrations. Like I was telling you, it's like, I just feel like I was felt so, um, fulfilled at that point. Right?

So your heart is full because we're doing charitable work and we're having fun. And, and we, you had the opportunity to pull in all these frames. And, um, it really was, uh, like I said, a life changing project, and I remember the campaign expanded so quickly and I know at one point it was building momentum and we're like, you had to buy this equipment to go into the schools and how are we going to get, how, how was just little you going to pay as a single mom for all of this. And then I kind of was feeling guilty too, because I'm like, Oh my God, I like kept saying it's okay, Tricia. Like, we will figure it out in the universe has your back. And you will be supported because of the good work you're doing. And then one day, you know, after work, you went to a bar and you started dating and you met the CFO of Amazon. So I mean, that kind of worked out well.

No, no, it's funny. Um, yes. I mean, I can only say that again. Like at that point in time, I was so happy with what I was doing and I felt so good about the work I was. I was putting out there and I felt so much deep gratitude for everything that was going on in my life. And so I believe that my energy was really, really high, like very light and open. And I think that at that precise moment is when I attracted my husband. Cause I think if, if I had met him, the same situation had occurred meeting in a restaurant like two years before I probably would not have attracted him at all because my energy would be more closed. Like I wasn't open. So I feel like doing really good work and feeling really good about what, what I'm doing. It's like really opened everything up for me.

I saw the change in year two. So, you know, you had kind of been dating on and off, but we were both pulling in not the right type of people. And I was like, gone Tinder, do this. And I had just met my boyfriend and you kept saying, no, I'm, I'm just going to focus on myself and the work that I'm doing, and you always felt that you would meet someone organically. And I do believe that you were your best version of yourself. And I think it's important to really work on yourself so that you can have the highest vibration.

Yeah. And I think I appreciate the way that everyone meets their partner. Like people meet their partner online most of the time, but some people meet in a grocery store or some people meet in a bar like I did. Um, but I do think that one of the crucial things that is so key is really feeling fulfilled already and feeling really happy within myself because I just, I believe that's the, that's the most important thing. And then regardless of the way you choose to meet someone, you have a way higher chance of actually really attracting a high quality person.

It doesn't help that you're, um, I mean, you're beautiful too. So you factor that in, but so your life is like a great afterschool special, but when we come back, I want to talk about this incredible love story. Cause it's really, it's interesting. And I think it will be inspiring. We'll be back. And for now this week's Tinder tips number. This truly is a time for reinvention. Don't be afraid to put yourself out there, shake it up, join a new or different dating app. You never know where that right person could be. If you think big, take a chance and ask for it, it will happen. Number two, never lose trust and keep in mind that there's a bigger picture or a larger plan in place. Number three in honor, of today's guests, dr. Tricia Rose do what she did keep that high positive vibe going your flow of energy or those feelings you have are important. Rely on the feeling of being expansive, trusting, hopeful, and giving. And we're back with dr. Tricia Rose. So dr. Rose, Trisha, you often talk about the importance of this expansive open mind and you, you always would say it's important to maintain that high vibe energy. And in the beginning, your husband, Tim stone had lived in Seattle at the time. And the two of you made it work for a short period of time until he moved here to be with you. And I remember you were getting on a plane really to go on your second date. And I remember thinking what, what is going on and what is the sleepless in Seattle? Like what's happening here, but you were with the right person and that right person made you and your life a priority. And I think you always did a great job of holding your value and putting what you want out in the world. And you still are that person today. Uh, so can you talk about why it's important to hold your value?

Sure. I've learned a lot of things. The hard way where I did not hold my value. And in my younger years, I definitely settled and played like second fiddle, so to speak. Like I just was never, I had a lot of insecurity and challenges, but over time is I built that, you know, they worked on building the practice and I felt more grounded in my, in like what I'm doing, my purpose. And then again with this charity and everything, I felt really secure. I feel like at that point, the partner that I was going to have, it was mandatory that we were equals. And that's what I've found. It's like I found my match. And so it's not that I'm, you know, the number one, it's not that he's a number one. It's like we both are equal. And that's what really is crucial for me because I know that my value is there. Like I have a purpose, a unique path and that's my North star. Like I have to continue on my path, but now I have someone standing next to me or, you know, walking that path with me and that makes it all, you know, all the better. So, um, I think it's more about redefining, like my own value and then kind of, you know, expecting and knowing I deserved like a match, like of true partner who would be there for me.

Right. But the other thing that you have to do since you're this mad little manifester, you're, you pay attention to energy and you with the campaign, it was the coolest energy ever, because I didn't even really have to think about the shoe. Usually I put a lot of planning and to say a cover shoot and these images, I really wanted to be special, but I would just show up. And these people were so dynamic and the day was perfect. Like, and then I get a parking spot and whatever, it just, everything was so simple. And I feel like, um, when you got married and met your partner, it was like, things just fell into place. Like you made very complicated things, work and happen. And I think you have this unique ability to kind of go with the flow.

Well, I think that's also part of, one of the main things that I've learned and that I've truly deeply believe in is that it is about surrendering to the bigger picture and trusting it because I had to trust it. I had to say, okay, I'm going to do this. You know? And the same thing, like with this campaign, like you said earlier, there were a lot of expenses involved. There was a lot of time planning and a lot of effort, but I trusted it. I knew we would be able to do it. It would come together and it did. And the same thing with, with that relationship when I met him, it's like, okay, you know what? This is what the bigger picture is. This is what the universe is, has in store. This is the plan. And so I'm going to go for it. It's kind of that trust. It's like, I'm not going to sit here and write a list of pros and cons and I'm not going to analyze why this shouldn't work and why he's from CA you know, he's in Seattle, I'm in Boston. I'm going to make the decision right now to just put all of that aside and just go with it and trust my gut.

Right. It's amazing. So you have this interesting and unconventional love story of a second marriage. And I think, you know, all marriage is all relationships. There's always opportunity. There's always things that happen, and it's not always a walk in the park. And so your first year, lots of things happened in such a short time. And, you know, Tim moves here and you buy a house and you get married and then, and then I'm like driving by your house. And I'm like, Oh, the lights are on where's Tricia. And you guys basically, without a lot of, you know, moments, notice you end up in LA and basically just take two suitcases and two cats and a dog. And it was like, what's going on? Why where's my friend? And then shortly that you had another move. So do you want to talk about like that first year that there was a lot of transitions?

Yes. And that's kind of like being at the, in the eye of the storm where there's a lot happening around us. Like we had, you know, job changes, you know, we have four daughters combined. There's a lot going on with the girls. It's a very, a lot of responsibilities, a lot happening, but in the center of it, we were calm and we were just kind of going with the flow. We were kind of doing what we needed to do at that moment in time. And there definitely were challenges for me when I relocated, because I left behind everything. I knew like the stability of my practice and all the familiarity that I had kind of grown accustomed to. And I think it was actually really good for me because I was able to kind of rebuild my, my life from a different place. It was a very humbling experience to move out to California because everything that I identified with was taken away from me. Like I didn't have an identity as a doctor. I didn't have an identity as a business owner. I didn't have the friend group. So there were moments that were very, very humbling. And I felt like, wait a minute, you know, how do I even introduce him? What do I say when I'm introduced to people about who I am? And I feel like it was looking back, it was a very, it was a, it was a gift to me because I had the opportunity to kind of go in a different direction and realize, like, even though I'm here in this new city and my husband has this big job, and I'm kind of like, they're not sure what I'm doing yet to where I belong. And my daughter actually went and lived in Canada with her dad. So it was truly just me and the dog and the two cats at home. Um, but that's when I, I did know in my heart, like I had this strong sense of, there is a reason this is happening and no matter what, I'm still me, this is the story. This is who I am. I carry that with me. Like, I, I know who I am. I know where I came from and I can take a minute and just kind of settle in and try to stay open to, again, the bigger picture. Why did this happen? You know, why did I meet this guy? Why am I out here all of a sudden? And what happened is I got in this whole new creative path that I would never have gone down if I had stayed in my previous life with my previous responsibility. So now I'm into some really exciting new projects and I'm grateful for that. So I, again, it's just the whole common theme of just going with the flow and trusting that there is a bigger reason why everything is happening when it's happening.

And I think you're excellent at that trusting, which I don't think a lot of people necessarily are, especially if they've been alone for a long time. And right now we are living through the most challenging time through this pandemic. Everything is uncertain. We have no control over what's happening outside in the world, around us. And we're all kind of embracing this new version or what we're trying to create. If we have to transition into a new job or create something out of thin air. And how are you embracing like this new creative project or is it been really exciting or do you want to talk about what you're up?

Sure. It kind of came to me organically because I was going through just a lot of learning curve, like steep learning curves with my daughter who at the time was 16. And, um, I just learned a lot, a lot from that period of time. And I went back and I had the time I had the luxury of time to look back even further and start to see how this whole experience was another, it was there for me to really grow and learn from it. Wasn't what I thought originally that having a child like Ray is about raising a child. I realized like very clearly that it was me that needed to grow up and mature and become the person who I am meant to be. And that this is just a new phase of that. It's like a, that's why kind of a theme is this Rose theme than my, you know, obviously it's my now my middle name, but it's about this kind of, it's like a permanent kind of blossoming. I think we all go through and different things happen at different times, but all of it's for the same purpose to get us to wake up and realize really how valuable we are and how important we are in the big picture. And we all have our place. And, and underneath that, there is this kind of common theme of, of hope and trust that things are really, truly happening for the better, good, the greater good,

Right. It sounds like it's going to be very spiritual. And I think this is why I always say, I feel like you could have your own podcast because you're a very deep thinker and you're very smart. And I love, I love that about you. I know the yesterday you mentioned that we all have our own story. We all have our own creative journey. I believe that. And yesterday, when we spoke, you said, we're never going back to the way things were now is really the time to embark upon new beginnings, but you are a force of nature sure. Ship, but we all need to be that driving force to create opportunities. Right? I mean, yeah,

I think so. And I think it's dark and scary. And as awful as this time is I do have that deep faith that there is going there will, we will emerge in a different way and there will be some silver lining in this experience for everyone. We just have to, it's almost like I've heard someone say this before, but faith, it's like a muscle it's like, you have to just keep working on that, developing and building that faith because there's a lot of negativity, you know, generally in the air right now. So it just takes for me that discipline kind of regularly to keep exercising that and like knowing trusting

In it and having faith that everything will be fine. Everything will be okay after all of this. Right. But I think one of the biggest things that you mentioned when you said you were out in LA, you didn't have a friend base around you and when you get isolated, like you're isolated right now, you can easily lose your sense of self, you know, because it's your friends who remind you, like you are so funny or you are so this, and you have everything to offer someone. So when you had to kind of go within yourself and kind of hold her own value without that support system. And I think a lot of people are going through that. I mean, I pulled in your driveway the other day so that I could do a senior portrait. And it was like, I was so happy to see you. And, you know, you came and helped me on the shoot. It was like so fun. And we lift each other up right. As friends. Right? So what we do, and I think more now than ever, we have to continue that. And that's why the podcast is so important to me because at least someone who doesn't have that support base, I was very lucky. I had wonderful friends that carried me to the other side. And I think don't undermine the importance of being a friend, especially nowadays, you know, definitely

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Patricia, what, what words of wisdom would you give our single listeners? If I could really wrap it into one statement, I would say that to attract the person who you really deeply deserve and want to be with, and to attract that match, the key is to really do what you need to do in your own life to feel really good about yourself and who you are. And for me, it has to do with helping others. It has to do with being of service to others. I feel like that's just generally speaking, like a very, very happy place to be. And I feel like when you are radiating that energy of fulfillment and you feel just genuinely blessed to be doing what you're doing, that's the moment that you will attract someone who is beyond anything you could have even thought of. Like, it's just, it's this incredible experience. And I know it's true because it happened to me. And so I just, I recommend

Just focusing on that first and then stay open and be out and about, or do your online dating, whatever it is you want to do, but you can trust that you're going to have a lot of very exciting surprises ahead.

So that's great. I think stay open, super important focus on giving focus on gratitude, Tricia. It was my honor, truly having you here today. I value our friendship so much and we never seem to run out of creative projects to do together. I know everyone's going to find some key takeaways and inspiration from all the life lessons you've learned. And I can't wait to have you back on the show when your book is published. So please come back real soon.

Oh, thank you. Carrie was so nice to be here.

This is what shot at love is here for,

To help you find love. Keep up the commitment to yourself and commit to helping someone else by sharing this podcast. Remember to stay safe and stay tuned for more episodes. If you'd like me to photograph you for your online dating profile, sign up for my shot at love promotion. Please DM me on Instagram, or you can find me on my website, Harry Brett lifestyle, portraits.com. I'm Carrie Brett, and we'll see you next time.