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April 3, 2024

#80 The Power of Now in Practice: Overcoming Life's Illusions | TJ Beaudette

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Season 1

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In this gripping episode, I had the pleasure of sitting down with TJ Beaudette, a former U.S. Marine infantry officer turned presence coach. Our conversation spans the importance of being present, overcoming the illusion of separation, and how to navigate the uncertainties of life with grace and strength. If you're on a quest for a deeper connection with yourself and the world around you, this episode is your map.

Key Highlights:

  • [4:22] - TJ's transition from Marine to presence coach and his journey to self-discovery.
  • [9:15] - Discussing modern stressors and the importance of presence in facing uncertainty.
  • [15:05] - The shift from survival to thriving through mindfulness and nature.
  • [21:03] - TJ's pivotal experiences with psychedelics and their impact on personal growth.
  • [27:07] - The grounding power of running and cold plunges for mental resilience.
  • [33:05] - TJ's deep connection with nature and the realization of oneness.
  • [48:08] - Emphasizing healthy boundaries for personal development and well-being

Links & Resources:

  • Connect with TJ: https://www.newagehuman.com/guests/tj-beaudette/
  • Eckhart Tolle’s “The Power of Now” - A guide to spiritual enlightenment that played a pivotal role in TJ's journey.
  • Wim Hof Method - For those interested in exploring breath work and cold exposure practices mentioned by TJ.

As we wrap up this episode, I'm reminded of the transformative power of presence and the journey to finding our true selves. If TJ’s story resonated with you, or if you're simply looking for ways to be more present in your own life, I encourage you to explore the practices and ideas we discussed today. Don't forget to rate, follow, share, and leave a review if this episode inspired you. Your support means the world to us and helps others find the guidance they need on their own paths to self-discovery.

Looking to reset and recharge? Our Immersive Meditation Experience is a live, virtual meditation session held every month. Sign up here to join the next session: newagehuman.com/monthlymeditation

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Transcript
WEBVTT

00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:04.722
I sat in the grass for, I don't know, probably like four or five hours, just sat there.

00:00:04.913 --> 00:00:06.512
Then I felt into my body.

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Then I just felt it.

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I felt it.

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I felt nature around me.

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I felt it was like the illusion of separateness dissolved.

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I opened my eyes.

00:00:13.394 --> 00:00:16.914
I had like tears coming down my eyes as I looked out in the mountains and such.

00:00:16.914 --> 00:00:21.405
And I was like, and that was the moment I knew that there's more depth to me.

00:00:21.518 --> 00:00:29.094
And I previously understood there's more depth to every human Humans have gotten lost is where we have forgotten our oneness.

00:00:32.493 --> 00:00:32.844
All right.

00:00:32.844 --> 00:00:34.564
Welcome to the New Age Human podcast.

00:00:34.573 --> 00:00:36.213
I'm your host, Jonathan Astacio.

00:00:36.404 --> 00:00:42.259
And today we're talking with TJ Beaudette, who has served as a U S marine infantry officer.

00:00:42.408 --> 00:00:45.948
Officer and now is helping others as a presence coach.

00:00:46.189 --> 00:01:00.838
Now, if you're interested in a mindfully packed episode where we talk about the concept of letting go, the illusion of separation, the importance of being present and dealing with uncertainty, stick around, you're going to get a lot from this.

00:01:01.088 --> 00:01:03.859
And lastly, I'm actually looking for some feedback.

00:01:03.859 --> 00:01:12.448
So I'm looking to hear back from you, whether it's something about what you like, what you dislike, or just simply saying, hi, I check all my emails.

00:01:12.769 --> 00:01:14.998
Now, with that said, let's get to the show.

00:01:14.998 --> 00:01:15.929
Alright, T.

00:01:15.929 --> 00:01:16.209
J.

00:01:16.239 --> 00:01:16.759
Baudet.

00:01:17.403 --> 00:01:18.603
Thanks for coming on the show.

00:01:18.884 --> 00:01:19.573
How's it going, man?

00:01:20.179 --> 00:01:20.918
Thank you, John.

00:01:20.998 --> 00:01:21.759
It's going great.

00:01:21.799 --> 00:01:22.918
Happy Sunday morning.

00:01:23.304 --> 00:01:23.713
Right.

00:01:24.399 --> 00:01:24.819
Yeah.

00:01:25.233 --> 00:01:26.903
A presence coach.

00:01:27.313 --> 00:01:34.403
I definitely want to get into that, but more importantly, I want to know like who was TJ before being a presence coach?

00:01:35.852 --> 00:01:36.341
TJ.

00:01:36.451 --> 00:01:38.191
Well, I spent eight years in the Marines.

00:01:38.231 --> 00:01:39.522
I was an infantry officer.

00:01:39.811 --> 00:01:43.262
I grew up in New York, so I was affected by 9 11.

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All I wanted to do was carry a gun, go beyond the front lines, and that's what I did.

00:01:47.772 --> 00:01:48.572
I went to college.

00:01:48.572 --> 00:01:50.712
I joined the Marine Corps the day I graduated.

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Became an infantry officer.

00:01:52.361 --> 00:01:53.611
Did that for eight years.

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Deployed three times.

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Once to Afghanistan.

00:01:57.977 --> 00:02:02.807
Once all over the Middle East, once to Japan, uh, awesome experience.

00:02:03.307 --> 00:02:06.766
Then after that I moved on to the corporate world.

00:02:06.846 --> 00:02:16.247
I was a medical device sales for four years and I started to go through this transition of really asking myself what I wanted to do.

00:02:17.266 --> 00:02:21.836
Really kind of diving into the emotions that felt like there was something missing.

00:02:22.366 --> 00:02:24.486
And that's what led me on this journey.

00:02:25.567 --> 00:02:34.477
just enhancing my own life and then it got to a point where I felt confident enough to share my experiences, to help others, uh, through their challenges as I continue to grow myself.

00:02:35.176 --> 00:02:35.697
Hmm.

00:02:35.747 --> 00:02:37.856
Well, first thanks for your service.

00:02:37.977 --> 00:02:39.116
Really appreciate it.

00:02:39.687 --> 00:02:47.912
And it's really cool to have someone with nine years of service and, traveling all over during that time period.

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Was it, it was after 9 11 and that was what inspired you, right?

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To be like, you know what?

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I want to be one of the guys that helps this country.

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Oh,

00:03:00.646 --> 00:03:03.546
was a firefighter that passed away in 9 11.

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So that was around the time that I knew that I was going to join the military.

00:03:07.366 --> 00:03:11.806
And then a couple of years after that, I met a Marine that was like, that was so badass.

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I want to be like that guy.

00:03:13.917 --> 00:03:16.067
And then, then that's how I chose the Marines.

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And then the rest is history history.

00:03:19.461 --> 00:03:23.032
so I, I'm actually curious what, what everybody remembers.

00:03:23.602 --> 00:03:27.192
What were you doing when 9 11 happened?

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Like, where were you?

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I was in seventh grade.

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It was my first week in a new school.

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And my, my school was seven through 12.

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So we were like seventh graders, but there was like high schoolers as well in the same building.

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So it was super intimidating as is.

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And on September 11th, they didn't really tell us what was going on beyond like this announcement, uh, that the world trade center had been attacked, but we didn't like know how severe it was.

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And, uh, so we were kind of oblivious to it, to be honest with you, even though we were only like, uh, 15 miles away from Southern Manhattan, we were oblivious to the depth of what was happening.

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At least I was until I got home until I saw it on the news.

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Uh, then I was like, Oh my gosh, like, like the towers aren't there anymore.

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Wow, and I, 15 miles away, that's, that's close.

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And yeah, at that age, right, it's going to take you some time to process it.

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And then, and say, Hey, you know what?

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I want to, I want to do something about this.

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So I applaud you with taking action and saying, let's, let's go.

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I was in art class.

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I was in.

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I think I was a junior at the time or a sophomore in high school.

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So like what, 10th grade?

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And they turned up the radio.

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We had, I don't know if we had a TV in there, but um, we were like, we, we didn't have that much more At that age of an understanding what was going on, I just was thinking this is crazy and then find out that a lot of people were getting picked up from school and I was just happy to get out of there because it was just chaos where you have people like just being emotional and not everybody had cell phones.

00:05:14.233 --> 00:05:17.062
So the communication was a lot different back then.

00:05:17.276 --> 00:05:21.156
There was not any texts that people were getting bombarded by.

00:05:21.165 --> 00:05:27.946
There wasn't that crazy social media to up the ante for anxiety and stress.

00:05:28.396 --> 00:05:30.896
And nowadays, and we're definitely going to get into that.

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If that happens, or it kind of did happen in a different way and put more potentially similar situations that can cause anxiety are just simmering with the algorithms, depending on where you are with social media.

00:05:46.052 --> 00:05:53.343
So you went and became, you went pretty much corporate sales with medical devices.

00:05:53.372 --> 00:05:56.252
And it sounds like after that you were like.

00:05:57.387 --> 00:05:58.767
Something needs to change.

00:05:59.148 --> 00:06:10.028
Was there like a catalyst like, something specific that happened that made you think, you know what, I need to change something, because that's, what you're doing now is completely different from what you were doing before.

00:06:10.088 --> 00:06:11.788
What made you make that decision?

00:06:11.833 --> 00:06:14.593
And I'm excited to talk about the algorithms to and the simmering.

00:06:14.603 --> 00:06:25.673
I feel that, uh, but yeah, it was the fall of Afghanistan was all over the news and I was, you know, what was once my life's purpose was kind of crumbling and everyone was telling me like by everyone.

00:06:25.673 --> 00:06:28.372
I mean the generals and the politicians I saw on TV.

00:06:28.372 --> 00:06:30.353
They were telling me like you should be proud of your service.

00:06:30.862 --> 00:06:32.083
The withdrawals to success.

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And at the time I was very frustrated.

00:06:34.442 --> 00:06:35.432
I was like someone.

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Can someone tell the truth?

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But what I have come to realize is that like everyone's entitled to their own truth.

00:06:43.213 --> 00:06:46.992
They could very well believe that it was a success, that we should be proud of our service.

00:06:47.002 --> 00:06:48.252
Like I get, I get that too.

00:06:48.742 --> 00:06:56.543
So it took a year of like hitting this rock bottom and then going out to nature by myself and running, I started running ultra marathons.

00:06:56.543 --> 00:06:57.622
I went back to therapy.

00:06:58.062 --> 00:07:04.463
Then I experienced psychedelics and I started to really understand that.

00:07:05.307 --> 00:07:06.408
I was feeling better.

00:07:06.427 --> 00:07:13.377
So I was like, okay, so changing my own life is my own willingness to look right at my own fear and go into it anyway and open to the unknown.

00:07:14.007 --> 00:07:24.817
And then once I got more confident in that, I got more confident in myself and my ability to stay grounded in the unknown, especially in this world.

00:07:24.817 --> 00:07:30.317
It's so unknown these days with what's happening and there's voices coming at us from every direction.

00:07:31.247 --> 00:07:35.538
every direction and it's all driven by to get our attention because that is what's valuable.

00:07:35.838 --> 00:07:46.817
So anyway, once I became more grounded in my ability, confident, my ability to stay grounded, then I just start sharing my perspectives and that's led to coaching and reflecting with others in ways that can be helpful.

00:07:48.028 --> 00:07:49.437
makes perfect sense too.

00:07:50.952 --> 00:07:58.802
The power of nature, the power of self care and going within for answers and really tackling your, I guess your shadow side.

00:07:58.802 --> 00:08:02.603
And then for some right, psychedelics, you throw that in there.

00:08:02.663 --> 00:08:08.112
That kind of boosts some experience of some wild experiences.

00:08:08.142 --> 00:08:11.283
We've had a couple of people on the show to share their wild experiences.

00:08:11.673 --> 00:08:14.173
But yeah, let's, let's get into what's going on.

00:08:14.182 --> 00:08:18.892
Like this was pretty much the ramp up to let's start talking about like.

00:08:19.697 --> 00:08:21.338
What's going on in today's world.

00:08:22.218 --> 00:08:28.108
There's a lot of stress, anxiety between the economy.

00:08:28.427 --> 00:08:32.427
Like you said, a lot of voices and opinions everywhere, right?

00:08:32.498 --> 00:08:37.467
Should I eat the egg whites and then the yellow or just the yellow, not the egg whites.

00:08:37.788 --> 00:08:41.368
Like there's, there's, there's, there's opinions for health.

00:08:41.668 --> 00:08:43.357
There's opinions for finances.

00:08:43.748 --> 00:08:46.118
So, maybe we can start with.

00:08:46.332 --> 00:08:54.552
What are you seeing more with your clients that is bringing the most stress?

00:08:54.552 --> 00:08:56.322
Yeah,

00:08:58.798 --> 00:09:05.607
Fear around the uncertainty and a lot of it is derived from what they're seeing through their phones through technology.

00:09:07.263 --> 00:09:07.602
yeah

00:09:08.018 --> 00:09:09.648
degrees of uncertainty.

00:09:12.582 --> 00:09:30.962
What uh, so definitely uncertainty and Man, I think one of the biggest things that i'm seeing right now currently it's 2024 It's just turning into spring and Yeah Crypto is starting to be a hot topic.

00:09:31.013 --> 00:09:39.873
And now you also have, so crypto AI and the economy, I think those are like the three big ones.

00:09:40.822 --> 00:09:43.143
It, what, what are your thoughts?

00:09:43.163 --> 00:09:45.712
Which one do you want to tackle first or talk about first?

00:09:45.942 --> 00:09:51.572
Cause I want to talk about maybe what your thoughts are on one of each.

00:09:51.633 --> 00:09:57.342
And we can talk about how to deal with the uncertainty in those categories.

00:09:58.488 --> 00:09:58.967
totally.

00:09:59.278 --> 00:10:08.498
I think first and foremost, like my first disclaimer to myself every day is I am skeptical of everything that comes through my phone.

00:10:09.097 --> 00:10:12.057
Like I don't know what's true or what's not.

00:10:12.327 --> 00:10:15.327
And that's everything from what I see on Fox or CNN.

00:10:15.388 --> 00:10:23.572
When I glance at those coming through social media, There's like, I get like a lot of texts each day that's like spam and trying to get me to go vote for this person or that person.

00:10:23.852 --> 00:10:26.452
Like, there's just so much noise coming into my phone.

00:10:26.962 --> 00:10:30.413
Uh, and I take it all with a grain of salt, so to speak.

00:10:31.043 --> 00:10:50.533
And a huge part of all of this is just getting confident putting the phone down and going to be outside and experiencing my reality that's in front of me and being, like, being open, uh, To the challenges and the beauty that's in front of me without being too wrapped up in what's presented to me through my phone.

00:10:51.388 --> 00:10:51.888
Hmm.

00:10:52.128 --> 00:10:52.607
Hmm.

00:10:52.727 --> 00:11:18.587
And then another thing is also from what I've seen and just, it also helps to be a content creator of some sort because you get to see what the mind, what's going on in the mind behind the camera and how you prioritize content you put out as a creator and the battles that you fight because.

00:11:19.427 --> 00:11:29.947
There is this constant chatter that I've had with people where don't talk about this, talk about this, this is gonna go viral, this is not, right?

00:11:30.408 --> 00:11:43.238
And at that point, you're just a, I guess a slave to the algorithm, which, why would you create content to begin with, unless it's just purely to make the money?

00:11:43.878 --> 00:12:08.202
And then, I'm sure there's a lot of people out there, especially as, you know, the finances get tighter and inflation gets higher and then the pressure gets higher and then like you said the noise the chatter yeah you're going to or so i can see i can understand how some people will prioritize the financial gain over the message and the mission right what are your thoughts on that

00:12:08.533 --> 00:12:14.322
Whoo, I think, I believe that artificial intelligence can free humanity.

00:12:14.852 --> 00:12:15.202
mm

00:12:16.123 --> 00:12:21.702
And I also believe that it can entrap humanity, and I believe that's an individual decision.

00:12:23.003 --> 00:12:36.543
That's up to the individual, and I don't know how it plays out step by step, but How it relates to finances and crypto and money like, yeah, there's a lot of uncertainty in how this next season of humanity plays out.

00:12:39.942 --> 00:12:49.832
I do believe that the people that who are going to become free and leverage AI in a way that frees humanity understand the value of their own energy.

00:12:51.923 --> 00:12:58.023
Understand that their own energy is more valuable than the vehicles that humans have typically used to transfer value.

00:12:58.893 --> 00:13:11.143
Whether that be money, hard currency that was once backed by the gold standard, Now, it's as easy as clicking my phone and like putting it up next to the payment thing.

00:13:11.143 --> 00:13:16.293
So, yeah, that's still federally regulated money or cryptocurrency.

00:13:16.482 --> 00:13:17.613
That's another vehicle.

00:13:17.673 --> 00:13:32.052
I don't know how it plays out, but I do believe that if we take care of ourselves, and we balance ourselves and we're able to put the phones down, we're able to express authentically into it intentionally, and then intentionally close the laptop and go live.

00:13:32.633 --> 00:13:41.682
Like I do believe that those people will lead into the future, receive the abundance and become more and more free of the noise in the world.

00:13:43.533 --> 00:13:59.582
i agree and One of the main things that I focus on, and I think you're speaking similar to that, where I see it as that survival mentality versus thrive mentality.

00:14:00.062 --> 00:14:00.653
The.

00:14:00.967 --> 00:14:21.528
Animal, or I guess the reptilian brain of quick thinking, bias thinking, it's easy to control somebody and influence someone when they're in survival mode because you got very little time to make a decision, very little facts to work on, and you're just skimming the top of the surface of all data.

00:14:22.567 --> 00:14:29.802
And, What I see what you and myself and people that are helping people go within and quiet and slow down.

00:14:29.832 --> 00:14:33.403
I love nature that does that very well to your point.

00:14:33.413 --> 00:14:35.482
Yeah, you take care of yourself.

00:14:35.543 --> 00:14:36.263
Everything else.

00:14:36.263 --> 00:14:38.173
And so many words is going to be taken care of.

00:14:38.173 --> 00:14:40.273
And I see it as getting out of that.

00:14:40.682 --> 00:14:45.702
Survival mentality and then moving into that more expansive thinking where you're like, you know what?

00:14:45.712 --> 00:14:48.873
I'm not going to make a decision right now just because I heard this.

00:14:49.423 --> 00:14:51.153
I'm not going to make a decision right now.

00:14:51.903 --> 00:14:55.982
I'll get back to you in 72 hours, right?

00:14:56.432 --> 00:15:02.403
Because there's less you're going to sort through more opportunities.

00:15:02.552 --> 00:15:07.082
Your mind's going to be less scarce and it's decision making.

00:15:07.092 --> 00:15:08.043
What are your thoughts on that?

00:15:09.883 --> 00:15:10.643
So I'm with it.

00:15:10.653 --> 00:15:21.682
And I think the most challenging thing for me as I've come through this journey of healing, of self growth, call it what you will, is one.

00:15:21.743 --> 00:15:24.923
I realized that it's, it didn't just start a year ago or two years ago.

00:15:26.082 --> 00:15:44.393
Then it's like it's a lifelong thing and to how often I have been in fight or flight unknowingly when I may have been in situations where I was keeping totally calm, where I was trained to keep totally calm.

00:15:45.052 --> 00:15:52.212
Uh, yet my body was in a perpetual state of fight or flight from the moment I woke up to the moment I went to sleep for a long time.

00:15:53.827 --> 00:15:54.258
You know what?

00:15:54.268 --> 00:15:56.658
That reminds me or I'm actually very curious.

00:15:56.687 --> 00:15:58.197
You're training in the military.

00:15:58.798 --> 00:16:03.847
How has that helped you with managing your stress levels?

00:16:07.187 --> 00:16:14.508
I believe that if we are strong enough to come through the experience, we are strong enough to feel the emotions that we may have bypassed when we are experiencing it.

00:16:15.097 --> 00:16:17.307
And the Marine Corps is pretty badass.

00:16:17.327 --> 00:16:18.967
It's a badass organization, right?

00:16:18.977 --> 00:16:22.418
Like guys go into it and like, we do hard things and yeah.

00:16:22.418 --> 00:16:32.437
So it's, it makes me more confident in my ability to handle the emotions that are under there and my, my willingness to go run an ultra marathon or go do a very long cold plunge.

00:16:32.837 --> 00:16:40.528
It's, it's the same mindset as I honed or developed in the military of like, at all costs, you will get through the obstacle.

00:16:40.868 --> 00:16:42.057
Now I just see the obstacle.

00:16:42.057 --> 00:16:44.967
I'm just learning to flow around it, but it's the same mindset.

00:16:45.528 --> 00:16:48.648
I'm also thinking like these, I want to get into these tools, right?

00:16:48.648 --> 00:16:53.748
These methods, uh, practices that you go through to challenge the mind.

00:16:54.177 --> 00:16:56.947
But before we get into that, I want to highlight.

00:16:57.727 --> 00:16:58.837
What can go wrong?

00:16:58.837 --> 00:17:05.577
What are some dumb mistakes we can do if we're not in the right mindset and really drive that home?

00:17:07.157 --> 00:17:15.038
I, uh, I have a story that my grandmother told me about, and maybe this can spark some memories of something similar for you.

00:17:15.738 --> 00:17:17.107
She told me that one day.

00:17:18.167 --> 00:17:21.377
She was getting ready to, I think, go to work or go out.

00:17:21.718 --> 00:17:27.748
And so of course you go, she, she keeps her clothes and shoes and stuff in the closet.

00:17:27.748 --> 00:17:31.458
So she goes to the closet and she's looking for her shoes and she can't find them.

00:17:33.617 --> 00:17:36.548
She also knows that she noticed that there's milk.

00:17:36.567 --> 00:17:40.597
There's a gallon of milk on the floor next to her shoes.

00:17:40.597 --> 00:17:42.127
And she's like, what is this?

00:17:42.788 --> 00:17:48.337
So she picked it up and went to the kitchen and open up the fridge to put it away.

00:17:48.647 --> 00:17:49.258
And guess what?

00:17:49.782 --> 00:17:52.583
In the fridge were her shoes that she was looking for.

00:17:53.413 --> 00:18:01.813
And how many times do you go to put like the salt in the fridge, you know, like just the weird stuff because you're just not present.

00:18:01.823 --> 00:18:03.292
You're just an autopilot.

00:18:03.803 --> 00:18:06.093
And for me, I'm like, that's an extreme one.

00:18:06.133 --> 00:18:06.472
Like.

00:18:06.833 --> 00:18:10.192
A gallon of milk is, is not a small or light thing.

00:18:10.192 --> 00:18:15.942
So you have to be really gone, not present at all to put that in your clauses.

00:18:15.952 --> 00:18:18.653
So, you have any examples of something like that?

00:18:18.823 --> 00:18:21.603
And I'm, I'm thinking about stuff for myself too.

00:18:22.238 --> 00:18:23.407
I'd love to hear yours too.

00:18:23.407 --> 00:18:32.188
I think what comes to mind right now is like, I've had some, some experiences on mushrooms where I have, I definitely, I was like, most of the time when I do it, I'm alone.

00:18:32.188 --> 00:18:34.428
I try to set, uh, the intention.

00:18:35.258 --> 00:18:40.748
And yeah, it's just like I have had some bad trips, some bad mushroom journeys.

00:18:41.188 --> 00:18:42.667
I say bad, challenging.

00:18:42.678 --> 00:18:43.928
They have been very challenging.

00:18:43.958 --> 00:18:49.357
They're not bad because there's still lessons and strength that comes from experiencing it.

00:18:49.758 --> 00:18:51.857
But as I, as I was going through some of those, I'm like, what?

00:18:51.857 --> 00:18:53.647
Like you're, you're pushing it too hard, TJ.

00:18:53.698 --> 00:18:55.157
Like you're pushing too far right now.

00:18:55.178 --> 00:18:55.688
Slow down.

00:18:56.063 --> 00:18:56.482
Hmm.

00:18:56.702 --> 00:18:59.952
So in, in that, are you saying that.

00:19:00.593 --> 00:19:09.712
I guess using the same terminology being in let's say like that fight or flight or that scarcity mentality going into mushrooms, right?

00:19:09.762 --> 00:19:11.113
I'm thinking philocybin.

00:19:11.323 --> 00:19:11.623
Is that

00:19:11.657 --> 00:19:12.327
So it's happened.

00:19:12.502 --> 00:19:13.192
Psilocybin.

00:19:13.752 --> 00:19:14.833
One of these days I'll get it right.

00:19:14.992 --> 00:19:25.313
Psilocybin is, I'm guessing it's a different experience versus coming into it when you're calm and relaxed and you're, you're, you're just in a, in a better state of mind.

00:19:25.373 --> 00:19:27.282
Is it like, how important is that?

00:19:27.682 --> 00:19:28.613
Or does it take over?

00:19:37.307 --> 00:19:38.167
I'm not sure.

00:19:38.917 --> 00:19:39.518
I'm not sure.

00:19:40.127 --> 00:19:45.847
Even the trips that have been challenging, I've still learned and have grown from them.

00:19:45.857 --> 00:19:51.958
So like, I don't, it's hard for me to say like, yeah, if you're not in the right state of mind, don't do it.

00:19:51.958 --> 00:19:52.988
I think there's still value.

00:19:52.988 --> 00:19:56.057
If you choose to do it, that is your choice.

00:19:56.657 --> 00:20:00.817
And we are empowered by knowing the depth of our choice in any situation.

00:20:01.228 --> 00:20:01.617
So.

00:20:01.928 --> 00:20:04.837
When I went into it, perhaps I was in fight or flight.

00:20:04.837 --> 00:20:10.538
Like I had a lot going on in my life and I was like, you know, I'm, I'm going to experience mushrooms today.

00:20:10.538 --> 00:20:15.897
Uh, yeah, yeah.

00:20:16.357 --> 00:20:23.008
And then I'd be in it and like, it would just take me to like dark places, but these are, these aren't unfamiliar places.

00:20:23.018 --> 00:20:25.938
These are places that I've, I've experienced previously in my life.

00:20:25.938 --> 00:20:29.837
These are emotions that I experienced previously, but I may have buried them under.

00:20:30.942 --> 00:20:37.123
drinking or whatever method I used in the past, and I've used many to bury emotions.

00:20:37.823 --> 00:20:40.633
You know, they're not, they're not unfamiliar, so to speak.

00:20:41.262 --> 00:20:42.123
They're parts of me.

00:20:42.153 --> 00:20:52.482
It's showing me if I remain ungrounded, how far off track, so to speak, my life can go.

00:20:53.222 --> 00:20:57.222
Cause it's like I was in this box of like safety if like in the military.

00:20:57.722 --> 00:21:02.512
It's like, yeah, there's leadership abilities and you're making decisions, but it's very much in a box.

00:21:02.512 --> 00:21:03.423
Same thing in corporate.

00:21:03.432 --> 00:21:04.323
It's very much in a box.

00:21:04.323 --> 00:21:21.103
Now I'm in this entrepreneurial space where I could go anywhere and do anything and you know, if I'm not grounded and I'm pushing the limits with psilocybin, it's going to show me like, all right, like, do you want to be homeless in 10 years?

00:21:21.482 --> 00:21:25.563
which sounds it's I know it sounds ridiculous, but it's it's a very real possibility.

00:21:25.853 --> 00:21:31.573
And unless I acknowledge those possibilities, then I can't also acknowledge how beautiful my life can get.

00:21:31.873 --> 00:21:34.502
I limit my the beauty, the potential beauty.

00:21:34.768 --> 00:21:40.701
And it's interesting how, um, nature has different ways of getting us back to it.

00:21:41.551 --> 00:21:47.761
it be psilocybin, ayahuasca, cannabis, poison, really.

00:21:48.511 --> 00:21:49.451
That'll make you present.

00:21:49.571 --> 00:21:50.571
You just want to live.

00:21:51.082 --> 00:21:55.362
And as you're talking, I'm also thinking like, what's some weird, wild stuff that I've done?

00:21:55.362 --> 00:21:58.051
Because honestly, that's been my journey.

00:21:58.082 --> 00:22:03.971
Like most of my like beginnings has been like not present at all.

00:22:04.422 --> 00:22:12.211
I just remember it was hard for me to progress and follow directions.

00:22:12.251 --> 00:22:17.261
I would be looking at someone straight, like, like, yes, as guys.

00:22:17.771 --> 00:22:34.852
Maybe sometimes it's hard to pay attention to when a woman talks or when someone talks and For me, it was just anybody if someone gave me directions they might say like Two words and then I'm off somewheres else wondering about those words, right?

00:22:34.892 --> 00:23:02.192
Maybe ADHD, but not Diagnosed some and for me I go into I Can see myself going into just that autopilot where you miss the exit on the highway and you go I've gone south for flight five exits on the highway just to 10 minutes in the wrong direction a bunch of times being in a rush, which is like the worst things happen when you're in the rush, you break something, you spill something, right?

00:23:02.511 --> 00:23:15.547
And it's like that calm and clear present moment that makes everything much more faster where that over and then that overthinking comes into play where You're just overthinking everything.

00:23:15.757 --> 00:23:20.737
And I'm also trying to think of, I mean, I've put clothes on backwards and worn it all day, right?

00:23:21.616 --> 00:23:36.547
it's my shoes and you put it on backwards, like that's obvious and immediate, but something more subtle, like imagine if you're not present enough and all those non subtle things pile up, that could be a bad situation.

00:23:37.132 --> 00:23:55.662
Is there any situations that you found yourself or maybe a client in where they realized that they just stacked all these quick bias, just not present moment thinking to the point where it's just a bad situation.

00:23:56.767 --> 00:23:58.156
All right, me.

00:23:58.297 --> 00:23:58.767
Totally.

00:23:58.836 --> 00:24:00.376
I lived like that for so long.

00:24:00.386 --> 00:24:00.807
I feel it.

00:24:00.836 --> 00:24:05.876
I would be driving down the highway, metaphorically speaking, and I missed my exit.

00:24:06.342 --> 00:24:10.112
And then the chatter about how dumb I am for missing my exit would start.

00:24:10.541 --> 00:24:15.682
And because of that, that would make the whole situation more intense, more cloudy.

00:24:16.041 --> 00:24:18.832
And I think the key to all of this is knowing that we are humans.

00:24:18.832 --> 00:24:21.311
We are going to miss our exit still from time to time.

00:24:21.321 --> 00:24:24.951
Like we are going to go off in the clouds and like, ah shit, I missed that one.

00:24:25.352 --> 00:24:31.402
But it's, can we have the self grace that when we are three exits past where we were supposed to get off to take a breath?

00:24:33.311 --> 00:24:35.041
Okay, I could just turn around.

00:24:35.082 --> 00:24:35.701
Oh, no.

00:24:35.771 --> 00:24:39.082
Uh, now I'm gonna be late to that really important work meeting.

00:24:39.701 --> 00:24:40.342
Let me take a breath.

00:24:40.362 --> 00:24:42.892
What's the worst thing that could happen if I'm late to this work meeting?

00:24:43.902 --> 00:24:45.801
Well, I could just say that I missed my exit.

00:24:46.682 --> 00:24:53.882
And, you know, like we could lean into worst case scenario in each breath and then realize, like, Oh, it's not that bad.

00:24:53.971 --> 00:24:57.201
Like, at some point, we could realize that we can just get off.

00:24:57.821 --> 00:25:02.521
And calmly turn around and go back and find our way to where we were meant to be going.

00:25:03.011 --> 00:25:07.422
And we don't need to get caught up in the negative chatter and the panicking.

00:25:07.981 --> 00:25:11.471
That can happen subconsciously sometimes.

00:25:12.461 --> 00:25:12.781
Yeah.

00:25:12.862 --> 00:25:21.221
I remember being in a rush to get somewhere by a certain time, freaking out and getting there.

00:25:22.731 --> 00:25:25.182
sacrificing a lot, right?

00:25:25.192 --> 00:25:27.112
You're driving and you're cutting people off.

00:25:27.571 --> 00:25:29.061
You're cutting corners.

00:25:29.061 --> 00:25:31.021
You arrive and you're putting yourself together.

00:25:31.321 --> 00:25:33.821
Mentally, you walk in as if nothing's wrong.

00:25:34.142 --> 00:25:35.682
And then you realize you're the first person there.

00:25:36.382 --> 00:25:41.332
I've had that where I stacked up the wrong information.

00:25:41.412 --> 00:25:46.791
I say stacked up meaning when I put the information in my phone to begin with, it was wrong information.

00:25:46.791 --> 00:25:48.082
It was an hour early.

00:25:48.221 --> 00:25:59.571
So now I'm stressed, but I'm an hour early and now I'm just helping set up at this point and then laughing at myself because I was so, I have to mend an argument.

00:25:59.936 --> 00:26:06.936
Uh, like that I had with my wife when I get home and for, for me to show up.

00:26:07.317 --> 00:26:09.696
Early it's it's a problem.

00:26:10.207 --> 00:26:10.576
Yeah.

00:26:10.626 --> 00:26:10.886
Yeah.

00:26:10.886 --> 00:26:26.666
So I definitely see what you're saying and for obvious reasons Let's get into the stuff that helps with that some tools anybody listening that I'm sure if you're listening and You know you you You attract your tribe, right?

00:26:27.366 --> 00:26:31.977
I'm sure there's some of us listening right now that are like, okay, so like what do we do?

00:26:31.977 --> 00:26:34.257
What are some practices that have worked with you?

00:26:34.257 --> 00:26:35.396
So let's start with you, tj.

00:26:35.402 --> 00:26:48.126
What, what do you do when you sense yourself saying, I am not in the right place right now, or, I need to get myself in the right place and need to be more present because I have X, Y, Z that I gotta get done?

00:26:50.402 --> 00:26:51.082
I do a lot.

00:26:51.571 --> 00:26:52.392
And it varies.

00:26:52.402 --> 00:26:57.561
So it's hard for me to give a specific answer because what worked for me three months ago may not be working for me now.

00:26:57.991 --> 00:27:01.182
So it's this constant exploration of things.

00:27:01.481 --> 00:27:10.711
So I'll like simply put, uh, I just fuck around to find out, like I just a willingness to go to a yoga class or go to a breath work class.

00:27:11.231 --> 00:27:22.852
What works, what seems to work most consistently for me running, I run a lot and that's become super grounding and cold plunging or just like just a cold shower to that.

00:27:23.237 --> 00:27:31.336
When my, when I'm getting pulled back into something that I know is not best serving me, but it seems like it could be a short term fix to what I'm feeling.

00:27:31.787 --> 00:27:37.946
Things that I used to go to often, and I don't want to do that anymore because I'm becoming more aware of how it makes me feel.

00:27:38.557 --> 00:27:44.686
Uh, a cold shower can be something that I just jump in just to remind myself of the path that I want to stay on.

00:27:46.291 --> 00:27:47.021
Cold plunge.

00:27:47.071 --> 00:27:50.652
So I want to tell you a little bit about my running experience

00:27:50.916 --> 00:27:51.416
Yes.

00:27:52.261 --> 00:28:06.692
So when I was younger and and there's a reason why when I was younger I had I was dealing with asthma So I hated running After a long period of time and it sucked because I loved to play soccer And so I kind of slowed down with that.

00:28:06.721 --> 00:28:13.592
It was like a puberty thing body just bad Bad health decisions, bad food, just the body said, you know what?

00:28:14.932 --> 00:28:15.711
Fuck your lungs.

00:28:17.481 --> 00:28:20.961
And so, I just disliked running and then.

00:28:21.376 --> 00:28:22.446
Years go by.

00:28:23.646 --> 00:28:36.217
I'm in a very stressful relationship, stressful job, stressful, stressful living situation to the point where I would have nosebleeds and I had to get eye surgery because I was going to have a retina tear.

00:28:36.237 --> 00:28:37.987
Just the body was shutting down.

00:28:39.507 --> 00:28:46.156
And I found out that where I was staying around the corner was a botanical garden.

00:28:47.257 --> 00:28:50.557
And I was like, I got to spend some time in this place.

00:28:51.207 --> 00:28:55.057
And then it got to the point where by the time I got home, I.

00:28:56.106 --> 00:29:55.981
You can't just I was like, you know, I'm gonna just run I'm gonna just run there and walk around But then the act of running put me in a place where like I I had to push Like my knees would start giving out just because I wasn't fit and I would just run through stuff and then just Kind of hobble the rest but the act of just pushing through something that I hated to do Really helped me over just get over All the pressure and the stress of the day because all I could think of is how much I hate running And there'd be times where I would go too far and and I would just enjoy Being outside and then it would get dark and now i'm running back and i've even ran even in the rain That like I I hate hated running and I was still run because i'm like I like it was Not as bad as the stress of the job of the relationship of the living situation You And then after that, I started to fast forward.

00:29:55.981 --> 00:30:03.392
I did Spartan races, I did the Tough Mudder and all from like the stressful situation.

00:30:03.392 --> 00:30:10.321
So the irony is that crazy stressful experience I had got me into really good habits.

00:30:10.896 --> 00:30:11.527
Yes.

00:30:12.457 --> 00:30:13.356
running helped you?

00:30:13.636 --> 00:30:14.836
Did you always like running?

00:30:14.836 --> 00:30:21.747
I mean, you were in the military, so you had to, you had to run regardless, but how has, like, what does running do for you?

00:30:21.747 --> 00:30:23.047
Like, what's your experience?

00:30:23.057 --> 00:30:26.686
Do you have anything like that where it just kind of changed your mindset?

00:30:26.686 --> 00:30:29.836
Wow.

00:30:30.086 --> 00:30:33.446
there was a day, a year and a half ago, I was going through a divorce.

00:30:33.987 --> 00:30:37.946
I was alone in an empty house for the first time in eight years.

00:30:38.977 --> 00:30:43.987
So much uncertainty, like six months before that I was in such a dark place.

00:30:43.987 --> 00:30:52.356
I contemplated ending my own life and I was, me and my mom were button heads, which we are in a much better place now.

00:30:52.356 --> 00:30:54.326
But at that time it was just, there's just so much tension.

00:30:54.737 --> 00:30:56.297
And she said some words to me.

00:30:56.916 --> 00:31:09.356
One day as we were talking as I was going through all this uncertainty that just like they cut really, really deep and I put up these boundaries and it was this argument like, Hey, like, don't talk to me anymore.

00:31:09.497 --> 00:31:21.007
Like it was like that, you know, and so we, we didn't talk for like two months after that, but that was the day that I just decided that I was going to run 30 miles and I had no business running, running 30 miles.

00:31:21.787 --> 00:31:24.676
But it was just like I just needed to change it up.

00:31:24.707 --> 00:31:28.457
I just needed to do something different and I finished it.

00:31:28.477 --> 00:31:29.317
It was very slow.

00:31:29.346 --> 00:31:29.977
I limped.

00:31:30.067 --> 00:31:31.426
I walked the last 12 miles.

00:31:31.717 --> 00:31:33.926
I didn't run the 30 miles, but I finished the 30 miles.

00:31:33.997 --> 00:31:36.196
got far before you started limping, man.

00:31:36.196 --> 00:31:37.666
I'm like two miles.

00:31:38.707 --> 00:31:39.517
Dragon feet.

00:31:39.586 --> 00:31:40.047
Okay.

00:31:41.196 --> 00:31:46.586
and I, when I got back to my house, I felt good for the first time in a long time.

00:31:46.596 --> 00:31:57.686
And I knew that no matter what happened, No matter what happened as my divorce progressed financially with work with my family, like I could always just run.

00:31:57.886 --> 00:32:03.057
I mean, so long as my body's physically able, which I know one day it will not be able to, and that's okay, too.

00:32:03.567 --> 00:32:11.376
But all I needed right now is a pair of shoes, and I could just get out there and ground and feel through some of the challenges.

00:32:11.376 --> 00:32:43.152
Uh, so that's why running has It's definitely been a cornerstone for me and you hit on nature too and that's something that I've taken a couple solo trips out to nature and if anyone is struggling with anxiety or life challenges and like has a feeling like something is amiss, that would be my recommendation is take a weekend, take a couple of days, turn the phone off and go in solitude and nature and just be because it is remarkably uncomfortable at first.

00:32:43.662 --> 00:32:47.541
At first, but then you start to like settle into the rhythm of nature.

00:32:48.221 --> 00:32:50.602
You start to get in tune with sun up sun down.

00:32:50.602 --> 00:32:54.241
You just start to feel into the energy of the animals wherever you are.

00:32:55.071 --> 00:33:06.551
And as you start to feel into and come into sync, like for me, that's where I had some real significant breakthroughs into new depths of myself was in nature and it's available to everyone.

00:33:07.342 --> 00:33:08.352
It's all around us.

00:33:08.997 --> 00:33:15.257
Breakthroughs as in after a period of time and reconnecting with nature.

00:33:16.326 --> 00:33:21.406
How, well, how long did it take you to see some sign of a breakthrough when you disconnect?

00:33:22.731 --> 00:33:26.432
So about two months after the story, I just told about like going for that 30 mile run.

00:33:27.061 --> 00:33:30.321
I went out to Asheville, North Carolina by myself.

00:33:30.701 --> 00:33:32.951
And I brought the book, the power of now with me.

00:33:33.011 --> 00:33:38.001
Cause I had read that when I was in the Marines, but it caused like more anxiety.

00:33:38.061 --> 00:33:43.051
Like I was like, I was like, all right, whatever's in this book is not compatible with training for and going to war.

00:33:43.051 --> 00:33:44.021
So I put it out of my mind.

00:33:44.481 --> 00:33:50.922
But after I hit a rock bottom, so to speak, uh, I opened back up to the possibility.

00:33:50.922 --> 00:33:52.422
So I brought the power of now with me.

00:33:52.432 --> 00:33:53.211
It was just me.

00:33:53.842 --> 00:33:55.892
And I was like, people can meditate.

00:33:55.942 --> 00:33:57.711
I'm going to figure this out.

00:33:57.781 --> 00:33:58.731
I'm going to get this down.

00:33:58.731 --> 00:34:00.182
And it was like this drive to do it.

00:34:00.521 --> 00:34:07.392
So day three out in nature, I sat in the grass for, I don't know, probably like four or five hours, just sat there.

00:34:07.582 --> 00:34:20.161
And I think it's chapter eight in the power of now, the beginning of it, where Eckhart Tolle is talking about, feel into the energy in your body and then feel into, you know, Allow it to merge with nature around you, the energy of nature.

00:34:21.351 --> 00:34:25.152
So for hours, my mind was just going and going and going.

00:34:25.181 --> 00:34:27.561
And it's like, TJ, go do this.

00:34:27.601 --> 00:34:28.791
Like, go do that.

00:34:29.052 --> 00:34:29.581
Go do this.

00:34:29.581 --> 00:34:37.231
And I just kept sitting there and finally I started to feel into my body and then like I would lose it again.

00:34:37.251 --> 00:34:39.621
Then I would come back to my thoughts, but I knew I was getting somewhere.

00:34:40.192 --> 00:34:41.791
Then I felt into my body.

00:34:41.791 --> 00:34:42.802
Then I just felt it.

00:34:42.842 --> 00:34:43.306
I felt it.

00:34:43.416 --> 00:34:44.396
I felt nature around me.

00:34:44.516 --> 00:34:47.786
I felt it was like the illusion of separateness dissolved.

00:34:48.617 --> 00:34:55.476
And in that moment, I understood what Jesus was teaching from a totally different perspective.

00:34:56.487 --> 00:34:57.737
And I grew up like Catholic.

00:34:58.436 --> 00:35:00.726
It's like, Oh my gosh, like, this is what he was saying.

00:35:00.726 --> 00:35:01.567
Like, it's all here.

00:35:01.987 --> 00:35:02.677
Like, this is it.

00:35:02.786 --> 00:35:03.567
Like, it's beautiful.

00:35:03.586 --> 00:35:04.206
I opened my eyes.

00:35:04.226 --> 00:35:07.746
I had like tears coming down my eyes as I looked out in the mountains and such.

00:35:07.746 --> 00:35:12.237
And I was like, and that was the moment I knew that there's more depth to me.

00:35:13.016 --> 00:35:16.766
And I previously understood there's more depth to every human on this planet.

00:35:17.706 --> 00:35:22.317
And, uh, yeah, so that was, that was a breakthrough moment for me, so to speak.

00:35:22.876 --> 00:35:24.367
five hours in the woods.

00:35:26.067 --> 00:35:26.876
Day three to

00:35:27.067 --> 00:35:27.686
Yeah.

00:35:28.452 --> 00:35:28.902
Right.

00:35:28.902 --> 00:35:34.362
You gotta be really dedicated and, and again, it's different for everybody, right?

00:35:34.416 --> 00:35:35.047
yes,

00:35:35.132 --> 00:35:44.632
So when you're on the ground, right, so you're grounded you're, you have that, direct connection to earth then you were sitting there.

00:35:45.411 --> 00:35:48.952
Could you go a little bit deeper into what you were experiencing?

00:35:49.731 --> 00:35:52.632
What do you mean by there is no separation?

00:35:56.157 --> 00:35:57.867
we are separate from each other.

00:35:57.907 --> 00:35:59.876
Like I exist, you exist.

00:36:02.186 --> 00:36:04.516
Everything is out is there, right?

00:36:04.536 --> 00:36:06.306
Like I'm not denying that we are separate.

00:36:06.327 --> 00:36:13.032
I think we're Humans have gotten lost is where we have forgotten our oneness.

00:36:15.492 --> 00:36:18.291
We have lost our oneness with all of this as well.

00:36:18.302 --> 00:36:19.831
Simultaneously, we are separate.

00:36:19.831 --> 00:36:22.492
Simultaneously, we are one with this, I believe.

00:36:23.342 --> 00:36:26.222
And that can be, it can't be taught.

00:36:26.851 --> 00:36:33.231
You know, I think this is what spiritual teachers speak in metaphors because the words cannot explain it.

00:36:33.621 --> 00:36:35.501
They can just be signposts to help.

00:36:36.226 --> 00:37:04.257
Each of us discover it within ourselves and as it's discovered, as it's felt, we begin to see, I have begun to see that my outer world is a reflection of my inner world, not the other way around, perhaps, and if that's true, it's like it shifts everything and it's scary to let go of what I was once clinging to for safety, for the perception of safety.

00:37:05.032 --> 00:37:11.202
yet as I let go and I allow things to shift and simply put, I just take care of myself.

00:37:11.202 --> 00:37:13.751
I just eat vegetables more often than I used to.

00:37:13.751 --> 00:37:26.302
I run a cold points, you know, it's like, it's not that complicated, but my life improves and I see synchronicities in my life and I meet new people and opportunities open up and my life improves.

00:37:26.382 --> 00:37:27.061
So that's it.

00:37:27.101 --> 00:37:30.362
It's like, that's what I'm trying to help people see.

00:37:30.536 --> 00:37:35.436
Hehehehe

00:37:35.492 --> 00:37:41.262
to understand when you let go and you stop.

00:37:42.711 --> 00:37:47.802
You have the wise man that's always annoying because he's always asking you questions and not telling you.

00:37:49.876 --> 00:37:51.657
Like, just tell me, what do I need to do?

00:37:51.956 --> 00:37:53.706
You will know when the time happens.

00:37:53.706 --> 00:37:59.327
I hate you because you don't, the language is internal.

00:37:59.327 --> 00:38:02.086
All this external stuff is a reflection of the inside.

00:38:02.086 --> 00:38:04.306
So it's right.

00:38:04.677 --> 00:38:05.706
So I get it.

00:38:05.786 --> 00:38:06.436
I get it.

00:38:06.932 --> 00:38:12.632
also thinking about what we spoke about nature, uh, meditation.

00:38:13.152 --> 00:38:19.813
Getting into that stillness so that you can reconnect to yourself and how that influences your outer world.

00:38:20.422 --> 00:38:21.532
Cold plunging.

00:38:22.472 --> 00:38:29.523
For me, from what I understood, cold plunging activates your nervous system.

00:38:29.523 --> 00:38:30.882
Like it puts you into shock.

00:38:30.893 --> 00:38:32.023
It's like a reset.

00:38:32.023 --> 00:38:35.717
Where you're just like Don't die.

00:38:35.728 --> 00:38:41.688
And then you're like, okay, like it's like the extreme of what you don't want so that you can get back to what you do want.

00:38:41.708 --> 00:38:43.927
That's how I see cold plunging as.

00:38:44.358 --> 00:38:46.347
Do you, do you have like a cold plunge?

00:38:48.438 --> 00:38:51.228
Like do you have the cold plunge or do you do cold showers?

00:38:51.228 --> 00:38:51.858
How do you do it?

00:38:52.413 --> 00:38:54.713
My gym has cold plunges and saunas.

00:38:55.413 --> 00:38:56.233
Yeah, yeah.

00:38:56.313 --> 00:38:58.273
It's cool, it's overlooking the Pacific Ocean too.

00:38:58.313 --> 00:38:58.402
It's

00:38:58.538 --> 00:38:59.007
Ah, please.

00:38:59.742 --> 00:39:00.123
Yeah.

00:39:01.342 --> 00:39:02.943
Do you, have you cold plunged before?

00:39:03.907 --> 00:39:11.407
I've, I've done cold showers, but not like the, I've done a cold plunge, but it was part of a Tough Mudder

00:39:11.873 --> 00:39:12.523
Gotcha.

00:39:13.038 --> 00:39:15.288
it actually was, Oh my God.

00:39:15.608 --> 00:39:24.378
My body was, I don't know how much into that story I should get into, but in the Tough Mudders, you have like the half and the full, right?

00:39:24.438 --> 00:39:28.137
I think the half is like three miles and the full is like six miles.

00:39:28.697 --> 00:39:29.668
And it was a group of us.

00:39:29.668 --> 00:39:33.007
And we saw that there were really cool obstacles on the second half.

00:39:33.193 --> 00:39:35.483
But we only signed up for the, for the first half.

00:39:35.503 --> 00:39:36.092
Like, crap.

00:39:36.523 --> 00:39:39.552
So we, you know, at the end you get your shirts.

00:39:39.592 --> 00:39:41.003
So we took our shirts off.

00:39:41.012 --> 00:39:44.643
So that it's not obvious that we were, went to a finish line.

00:39:44.822 --> 00:39:47.262
We, we hid it under a garbage bin.

00:39:47.572 --> 00:39:50.302
And we just hopped the fence and went to the second half.

00:39:51.182 --> 00:40:06.163
And I was like, the one guy that was like, I was the one guy that was saying, maybe we shouldn't do this because my, I was already still starting to feel the, uh, my body going to, uh, you know, to its limits and everybody else was like, let's go.

00:40:06.172 --> 00:40:06.922
I'm like, all right, fine.

00:40:08.233 --> 00:40:08.913
I was hurt.

00:40:09.742 --> 00:40:16.063
I was like, I think one mile left and my, my legs gave out.

00:40:16.112 --> 00:40:16.472
I.

00:40:17.432 --> 00:40:18.813
I, it was painful.

00:40:19.373 --> 00:40:28.583
And so I'm limping and one guy comes and he has like a backpack and he's, he's prepared to like help anybody like myself who was just lying on the floor at this point.

00:40:28.952 --> 00:40:32.552
And he gave me mustard for like packets.

00:40:32.882 --> 00:40:34.882
And he gave me like electrolytes.

00:40:34.882 --> 00:40:36.943
I'm like this guy, like this is guy's a godsend.

00:40:36.943 --> 00:40:37.882
Like he's an angel.

00:40:39.663 --> 00:41:32.347
And then within eye distance, I see this structure and it's like this truck and A ramp and it was the cold plunge and they're like just keep going because your body's gonna reset And so i'm limping and I got I found like a stick, you know, let's walk it with a stick and it's One of those containers the shipping containers filled with ice Water like there's ice floating on top of it and there's a ramp sliding down and then you can't jump out of it You have to go through the whole length of that container and there's ropes there's like a roped netting like um for you to like pull yourself and before I go in i'm like Do you have any advice because I hate Cold water and he's like just don't forget to breathe.

00:41:32.438 --> 00:41:33.248
I'm like, what do you mean?

00:41:33.248 --> 00:41:36.378
Don't forget to breathe I'm gonna like am I gonna pass out?

00:41:36.378 --> 00:41:37.737
Am I gonna just not be able to breathe?

00:41:38.018 --> 00:41:52.782
So that didn't help but i'm like, all right, I have to go and I yeah, I went in and I was just shortness of breath and i'm just climbing and and just trying to get through it I climb out and My legs everything was A lot better.

00:41:52.782 --> 00:41:54.782
I was able to start at least jogging a little bit.

00:41:55.023 --> 00:41:59.032
It's insane what the body does when it can get a reset, a shock to the system.

00:41:59.632 --> 00:42:06.302
The, um, inflammation was virtually gone for, let's say 10, 15 minutes.

00:42:06.663 --> 00:42:08.273
And I was just taking advantage of that.

00:42:08.273 --> 00:42:12.632
But that was my first like extreme Go into the water.

00:42:12.632 --> 00:42:16.373
I was always the last, like growing up, I was always the last kid into the pool.

00:42:16.413 --> 00:42:16.773
Right.

00:42:16.782 --> 00:42:18.373
Just like everybody's having fun.

00:42:18.373 --> 00:42:19.523
I'm like, it's too cold.

00:42:19.543 --> 00:42:23.952
I got to mentally get myself into it and to now willingly do that stuff.

00:42:24.273 --> 00:42:28.163
If I can do it and you're listening, you can do it for sure.

00:42:28.172 --> 00:42:29.092
Like if you have a.

00:42:29.108 --> 00:42:35.882
Um, And then maybe I can upgrade to a gym where I'm overlooking the lake or the ocean.

00:42:36.271 --> 00:42:37.331
Because that's just nuts.

00:42:37.501 --> 00:42:40.811
Any tips on someone who doesn't have access to that gym?

00:42:40.811 --> 00:42:41.692
Ha ha

00:42:41.786 --> 00:42:43.987
that's a, that's an awesome cold plunge story right there.

00:42:43.996 --> 00:42:46.947
That's an awesome first cold water experience right there.

00:42:47.556 --> 00:42:48.266
Super cool.

00:42:48.561 --> 00:42:49.601
Ha

00:42:50.166 --> 00:42:51.956
I would, Cold showers.

00:42:52.027 --> 00:42:52.686
Cold showers.

00:42:52.766 --> 00:42:55.567
it's I'm sure there's differences.

00:42:55.626 --> 00:43:01.396
I'm sure one is better for inflammation and like there's science behind both.

00:43:02.226 --> 00:43:02.577
Yeah.

00:43:02.586 --> 00:43:26.485
For the mental, for me, it's overcoming the mental blocks of getting into the cold water and a cold shower will provide the opportunity for there to be a block for us to not want to do something, but to choose to do it anyway, just to see how it feels on the other side, because it may allow us to feel better than we Well,

00:43:27.202 --> 00:43:28.041
nature.

00:43:28.052 --> 00:43:32.882
Is there anything that we haven't mentioned that you use?

00:43:34.666 --> 00:43:48.556
after I meditated for the first time, you know that like five hour story, I discovered breath work and I discovered breath work and I was like, Oh, like this helps me get to it so much quicker than just sitting out in the grass for hours.

00:43:48.567 --> 00:43:50.016
So breath work is another one.

00:43:51.072 --> 00:43:51.472
Okay.

00:43:52.126 --> 00:43:52.737
Anything.

00:43:52.922 --> 00:43:57.811
a, like a, like those deep breaths where you get lightheaded.

00:43:58.347 --> 00:43:58.737
Yeah.

00:43:58.737 --> 00:44:01.726
Like, um, and you can find free breath work sessions on YouTube.

00:44:01.726 --> 00:44:01.965
Absolutely.

00:44:02.197 --> 00:44:07.126
There's there's just do breathwork by Sandy or Wim Hof both really good options.

00:44:07.376 --> 00:44:10.876
Yeah, Wim Hof is the man in that belly chest release and repeating the patterns.

00:44:11.126 --> 00:44:14.056
You can also just do it on your own and I do it all the time.

00:44:14.056 --> 00:44:16.067
I just experiment with different.

00:44:16.137 --> 00:44:23.876
I experiment with breathwork in the cold plunge just to work through the times where uncomfortable emotions come up.

00:44:24.496 --> 00:44:27.336
And the ability to be able to handle that.

00:44:28.387 --> 00:44:36.867
And just know that, like, let the emotions come, let the emotions be released as they're ready and dissipate and know that it's just a knowing it's faith.

00:44:36.896 --> 00:44:42.467
Actually, it's faith that whatever comes up in the future, we will be strong enough to handle it.

00:44:43.626 --> 00:44:49.327
And building trust with ourselves and strengthening our own story helps us know that.

00:44:51.411 --> 00:44:51.672
No.

00:44:51.731 --> 00:44:51.992
Yeah.

00:44:52.021 --> 00:44:52.521
Well said.

00:44:52.581 --> 00:45:01.811
And to your point, if you're in a stressful situation, you can't just leave the room running and jump into the water, right?

00:45:01.831 --> 00:45:04.632
Cause it's not always going to be around for you to do last minute.

00:45:04.632 --> 00:45:06.181
So yeah, breath work for sure.

00:45:06.202 --> 00:45:11.052
I see myself doing breath work, but I would like to learn a little bit more because I just do like long breaths.

00:45:11.072 --> 00:45:11.961
If I'm stressed, I'm just

00:45:13.146 --> 00:45:14.027
Yeah, yes.

00:45:15.487 --> 00:45:15.947
Right?

00:45:15.947 --> 00:45:21.577
Just I

00:45:21.827 --> 00:45:22.157
Cause it's,

00:45:22.327 --> 00:45:22.856
doing that.

00:45:24.311 --> 00:45:24.891
Yes.

00:45:25.822 --> 00:45:33.351
I mean, if you think about it though, it's, it can be that simple because we can be five exits past where we were supposed to get off.

00:45:33.371 --> 00:45:35.811
And then we realized that we're late and we're lost.

00:45:36.501 --> 00:45:46.942
And then that breath allows us just that little bit of space before we start responding and making decisions again to know that we're still okay.

00:45:47.012 --> 00:45:52.041
It probably would have been better if we got off when we were supposed to, but like, we are still okay.

00:45:52.101 --> 00:45:59.842
And let's just, now, from this space of knowing we're okay, make decisions to solve the issue or the challenge.

00:46:00.757 --> 00:46:01.286
Well said.

00:46:01.896 --> 00:46:02.527
Pull over.

00:46:02.847 --> 00:46:03.396
Breathe.

00:46:04.376 --> 00:46:05.356
Freaking breathe.

00:46:05.356 --> 00:46:09.295
Oh,

00:46:09.552 --> 00:46:12.842
I had to, well, I changed my tire on the side of the highway.

00:46:13.052 --> 00:46:14.952
And still made it to where I was going on time.

00:46:15.416 --> 00:46:15.697
Good.

00:46:15.706 --> 00:46:16.697
But was it raining?

00:46:17.311 --> 00:46:18.371
It was not raining, no.

00:46:19.161 --> 00:46:19.992
Yeah, yeah.

00:46:21.177 --> 00:46:37.737
That's like, have you ever driven by somebody and like, pulled over and their tire's flat and you're like Oh, man, that sucks, you know, I hope they're breathing, you know, I hope they're relaxing I've yeah, yeah

00:46:37.762 --> 00:46:40.032
Oh, this is Go ahead.

00:46:40.626 --> 00:46:41.166
go ahead i'm

00:46:41.422 --> 00:46:46.092
Well, it's an interesting topic because, you know, there's something to be said about.

00:46:46.092 --> 00:46:49.762
Like, yeah, we're going to see other people on the side of the highway in our journey.

00:46:50.681 --> 00:46:52.081
And we can't help everyone.

00:46:53.641 --> 00:46:57.181
So do we So how do we respond to that?

00:46:57.242 --> 00:47:03.882
Because we're going to see a lot of people in this world who are very wrapped up in what their phone's presenting to them.

00:47:04.181 --> 00:47:12.211
And maybe they're not at our depth of awareness on how we handle these challenges.

00:47:13.661 --> 00:47:23.461
And I'm sure there's people that handle the challenges better than you and I at the same time, but it's not our job to go and fix other people's problems.

00:47:24.311 --> 00:47:25.922
What we perceive as their problems.

00:47:26.012 --> 00:47:41.992
I think we have to or get to normalize Leaving people in the reality that they've chosen to be in and it's okay and we could just be an example with our own life, but we don't have to go out and fix and change and You know

00:47:43.396 --> 00:47:49.362
that's like a very great area right because you can always be like well, you know, they made their decision Right.

00:47:49.422 --> 00:47:51.152
And now you just seem like an ass.

00:47:51.842 --> 00:48:03.692
I never think the same time I would, the way I manage that is, uh, if I feel called to help them, uh, and I use that word specifically.

00:48:05.561 --> 00:48:14.472
And if you practice that presence, it'll be more obvious and it'll be louder.

00:48:15.077 --> 00:48:20.146
Of a calling, let's just, let's just say, versus being stressed and being like, I can't handle it.

00:48:20.706 --> 00:48:23.436
And then you go and you, maybe it's not the right time.

00:48:23.436 --> 00:48:26.626
You'll probably make it worse if you're in a bad space.

00:48:27.217 --> 00:48:39.170
So you, you mentioned the whole, the algorithm, the texting, the social media, right, we have echo chambers, the algorithm creates echo chambers.

00:48:39.492 --> 00:48:40.481
Echo chambers.

00:48:40.492 --> 00:48:44.621
If you like a certain subject matter, you're going to get people that talk about it.

00:48:44.641 --> 00:48:46.242
That doesn't mean that everybody.

00:48:47.021 --> 00:48:49.161
It's thinking like you, right?

00:48:49.342 --> 00:48:51.842
And I always joke around, create two accounts.

00:48:51.871 --> 00:49:01.112
The second count would just deliberately click on things and search things that are opposite of what your belief structure is and what you think should be done.

00:49:01.141 --> 00:49:08.362
And you'll be amazed at how many people did the exact same thing, but it was, Because of their belief structure, right?

00:49:08.362 --> 00:49:10.331
It'll just kind of break you out of that matrix.

00:49:11.211 --> 00:49:14.211
Uh, but I'll tell you what I've done.

00:49:14.211 --> 00:49:15.302
I'm curious what you've done.

00:49:16.202 --> 00:49:23.771
To manage stress or to get out of that constant waiting for the beeping and the buzzes.

00:49:25.711 --> 00:49:37.552
I keep my phone on do not disturb and silent, and I only, and I can, I have a Samsung, so I set it up for emergency contacts only can get past that.

00:49:37.581 --> 00:49:44.012
So I don't have to worry about missing a phone call from like my wife or someone that I know needs is going to need me.

00:49:45.032 --> 00:49:46.101
That helps out a lot.

00:49:46.132 --> 00:49:48.402
And it also helps me manage my phone.

00:49:48.402 --> 00:49:50.041
So I'm not constantly looking at it.

00:49:50.391 --> 00:50:02.262
It sounds counterintuitive because if you don't know if someone texts you, you're gonna be like, I don't know, but if you plan ahead, you'll know when are the good times like you review it at certain points, obviously, but not all the time.

00:50:02.271 --> 00:50:02.791
Every time.

00:50:02.791 --> 00:50:04.601
Cause someone dinged and was that me?

00:50:04.601 --> 00:50:05.141
Was that you?

00:50:05.152 --> 00:50:05.532
Right?

00:50:05.811 --> 00:50:08.552
How do you manage the whole social media?

00:50:09.101 --> 00:50:11.431
Situation without getting crazy.

00:50:13.402 --> 00:50:24.047
Well might be crazy, I don't know Very similarly Typically on do not disturb with social media, don't allow the notifications to come through.

00:50:24.757 --> 00:50:31.427
So I try to be intentional about when I click into it to engage with people because it's very, very stimulating.

00:50:31.436 --> 00:50:34.367
We have these minds that maybe they're like monkey minds, right?

00:50:34.726 --> 00:50:37.597
And maybe they're used to engaging with like 20 people per day.

00:50:37.887 --> 00:50:41.597
And you go on social media and it's just like thumbscroll after thumbscroll.

00:50:41.597 --> 00:50:43.067
It's just a lot happening.

00:50:44.146 --> 00:50:45.036
It can be intense.

00:50:45.407 --> 00:50:47.277
So yeah, very similarly boundaries.

00:50:47.286 --> 00:50:47.817
And.

00:50:48.501 --> 00:51:01.572
I express my boundaries to people as well in text messages when they say things or do things that I'm like, no, like this is, this is a topic for a more intentional type conversation.

00:51:01.581 --> 00:51:05.902
Not necessarily like, Hey, I'm just going to, we're going deep.

00:51:05.902 --> 00:51:09.181
It's like, hold on, let's, let's set up time to go deep together.

00:51:10.262 --> 00:51:10.452
Yeah.

00:51:10.452 --> 00:51:17.391
I'm trying to make eggs right now and I'm not ready to talk about how the universe was created and my thoughts on it.

00:51:17.672 --> 00:51:24.572
Which is actually a good, um, I, I read this book and I'm, I need to read it again, I think it's called boundaries.

00:51:26.666 --> 00:51:34.016
Very interesting book, but it was just talking about, are you familiar with that book or is that new for you?

00:51:34.141 --> 00:51:36.751
Not the book, but I think boundaries are a superpower.

00:51:37.126 --> 00:51:37.567
Oh yeah.

00:51:37.646 --> 00:51:38.016
Yeah.

00:51:38.067 --> 00:51:38.396
Right.

00:51:38.396 --> 00:51:38.856
Superpower.

00:51:38.867 --> 00:51:42.496
I would always I don't want to say be jealous, but I would envy it a little bit.

00:51:42.496 --> 00:51:45.166
People that are very good with their boundaries.

00:51:46.496 --> 00:51:48.686
I'll give an example of one.

00:51:49.856 --> 00:51:56.710
Let's just say, a coworker of mine, you know, like, let's say you're working at a job and your boss calls you during lunch.

00:51:56.760 --> 00:51:59.409
Do you pick up right?

00:51:59.409 --> 00:51:59.465
Right.

00:51:59.925 --> 00:52:05.155
I have been trained, unfortunately, to just always be available.

00:52:05.945 --> 00:52:11.755
So I naturally would pick up going, going against boundaries.

00:52:11.974 --> 00:52:17.605
This other guy doesn't answer the phone, text his boss.

00:52:17.965 --> 00:52:18.655
I'm on lunch.

00:52:18.655 --> 00:52:19.635
I'll call you after.

00:52:20.355 --> 00:52:25.255
And there's the boss felt humor in that because he's not used to that happening.

00:52:26.954 --> 00:52:32.565
And he wasn't surprised that that person did that because they're really good with their boundaries.

00:52:32.755 --> 00:52:41.534
So it's, if you're consistent with it, people will write, they'll, they'll honor your boundaries, but it takes like that first time.

00:52:41.545 --> 00:52:43.215
And for me, I'm pretty sure.

00:52:43.690 --> 00:52:48.869
As I push my boundaries is going to get some pushback because he's like, what do you mean?

00:52:48.869 --> 00:52:49.429
It's me.

00:52:49.460 --> 00:52:51.780
I was like, now's not the right time, right?

00:52:51.780 --> 00:52:52.789
You're going to get pushback.

00:52:53.393 --> 00:52:57.773
has there been any time where you had to really lean on your boundaries and someone gave you pushback?

00:52:57.813 --> 00:52:58.103
And if

00:52:58.228 --> 00:52:59.137
Oh my gosh.

00:52:59.498 --> 00:53:00.077
Yes.

00:53:00.128 --> 00:53:07.838
I mean, when I started speaking openly about the, about the challenges I've been through, about my perspective and how I'm seeing things.

00:53:07.858 --> 00:53:08.338
Oh yeah.

00:53:08.367 --> 00:53:12.467
People that I grew up with, people that, friends and family.

00:53:12.987 --> 00:53:26.557
Some very supportive, some silent, apathetic and some very, uh, testing of my boundaries and basically saying not just testing the boundaries, right?

00:53:26.577 --> 00:53:41.418
Like I think as you start raising your vibration and changing your life and improving, there are people that because of their blindness, because of their pain, they don't actually want to see it or are able to see the evolution of someone else.

00:53:41.898 --> 00:53:51.257
So they will say and do things that if boundaries aren't there, uh, can cut away at the core at our self confidence.

00:53:51.998 --> 00:54:01.288
So for me, it's just the things like the cold plunge and the meditation, the things that allow me to feel the emotions deeper into my shadow.

00:54:02.088 --> 00:54:04.427
They allow me to shine light on that stuff.

00:54:05.318 --> 00:54:07.498
So when it comes up again, it's like, Oh, I know it.

00:54:07.507 --> 00:54:08.038
That's me.

00:54:08.682 --> 00:54:19.063
And I put boundaries around it so I can continue to know myself, not take on energy or, uh, the guidance of others who may not be looking in the same direction as me.

00:54:20.152 --> 00:54:24.123
And, yeah, continue to strengthen them as I go.

00:54:24.302 --> 00:54:28.052
But I think that's the key to this, navigating this world, is our own boundaries.

00:54:28.932 --> 00:54:29.532
It's interesting.

00:54:29.532 --> 00:54:35.432
Um, as I'm thinking it, you started talking about it, which was interesting where that cold plunge.

00:54:36.277 --> 00:54:44.387
Helps you know your boundaries and it's like what separates you from other people and other things is that that boundary?

00:54:45.108 --> 00:55:01.123
And I know For me, it's been a challenge to understand my boundaries because I have more so Growing up, but I've treated everything as in no boundaries because I'm infinite and I can do anything.

00:55:01.202 --> 00:55:01.543
Right.

00:55:02.003 --> 00:55:04.407
And as you get older, those boundaries, are louder.

00:55:05.536 --> 00:55:09.317
And, um, I think of as, you know, like you've ever drawn a picture, right?

00:55:09.317 --> 00:55:11.047
What do you start with the boundary?

00:55:11.891 --> 00:55:15.101
The outline, because you need to know what to work with.

00:55:15.501 --> 00:55:18.621
You're going to draw a sun, you start with a circle.

00:55:18.711 --> 00:55:21.152
You don't start with yellow and then circle around it.

00:55:22.192 --> 00:55:22.501
Right?

00:55:22.592 --> 00:55:23.822
Draw a face, right?

00:55:23.822 --> 00:55:30.442
When I learned how to draw pictures of people and specifically the Simpsons there's a certain boundary.

00:55:30.717 --> 00:55:34.146
And everybody looks the same, the simpler it gets.

00:55:34.146 --> 00:55:41.766
But as you spend more time perfecting and understanding that boundary, you notice what your differences are.

00:55:41.766 --> 00:55:58.516
And I feel like a lot of those challenges that we go through and put ourselves through those, like the best experience, uh, I guess, uh, comparison I have is when I was drawing Homer versus Bart from the Simpsons, Homer has a round head with two hairs, four hairs, exactly.

00:55:59.117 --> 00:56:03.266
But it's all starts with that rectangular shape.

00:56:03.336 --> 00:56:11.027
That's now a cylinder at the top or a circle at the top, but then it changes when it's Bart because Bart has these little notches.

00:56:11.056 --> 00:56:11.456
Exactly.

00:56:11.456 --> 00:56:18.637
I think he's exactly nine, but it's because I spent more time and understanding, okay, it's nine.

00:56:18.686 --> 00:56:20.306
If it's eight, it's not Bart.

00:56:20.996 --> 00:56:22.456
If it's 10, it's not Bart.

00:56:22.487 --> 00:56:23.956
And it just looks weird.

00:56:25.246 --> 00:56:30.856
And those are the challenges that we put ourselves through are the things that tell us, wait, you.

00:56:30.947 --> 00:56:34.907
You're, you're not, you know, you have nine notches, so to speak.

00:56:34.916 --> 00:56:38.396
You don't have eight and that makes you more unique.

00:56:38.407 --> 00:56:39.827
And then you can appreciate that.

00:56:40.056 --> 00:56:42.507
And then that in turn helps with your boundaries.

00:56:42.847 --> 00:56:44.255
You're like, no, no, no, no.

00:56:44.257 --> 00:56:46.507
I got nine notches, right?

00:56:46.697 --> 00:56:47.456
Or whatever.

00:56:47.697 --> 00:56:50.067
I, you know, I'm five foot four.

00:56:50.067 --> 00:56:51.746
I'm not going to be able to jump that high.

00:56:51.777 --> 00:56:53.137
I'm not going to, I'm not going to.

00:56:53.501 --> 00:56:55.192
Upset myself, right?

00:56:55.242 --> 00:56:57.431
I need to work on myself so I can dunk.

00:56:57.561 --> 00:56:58.161
I'm sorry.

00:56:58.181 --> 00:57:03.032
I'm not gonna get upset because I can't dunk and you can you're like a whole head taller than me

00:57:03.396 --> 00:57:03.856
Yeah.

00:57:03.862 --> 00:57:05.242
going to shame myself.

00:57:05.282 --> 00:57:13.461
This is What I can do right and so I appreciate the cold plunges I appreciate the running until like your knees gave up because you're like, you know what?

00:57:13.961 --> 00:57:23.012
I'm not gonna do a marathon because I know I can do three miles and that's okay because that's where you're at now So that's that's how my mind was processing as you were talking about it

00:57:23.347 --> 00:57:24.166
That's really good.

00:57:24.197 --> 00:57:26.467
Yeah, it's like I got nine notches.

00:57:26.887 --> 00:57:31.226
I'm not better or worse than anyone because I have nine notches, but I know I have nine notches.

00:57:31.266 --> 00:57:32.106
That's just what it is.

00:57:32.942 --> 00:57:34.581
Yeah, exactly.

00:57:34.802 --> 00:57:34.931
You

00:57:35.177 --> 00:57:35.536
yeah

00:57:36.132 --> 00:57:36.802
I can go.

00:57:37.702 --> 00:57:40.652
I've tested poison ivy on myself like an idiot.

00:57:44.121 --> 00:57:45.012
I was just like,

00:57:45.306 --> 00:57:46.797
What was the purpose of the test

00:57:47.181 --> 00:57:52.811
so I was in junior high and I was trying to figure out how many notches I have, so to speak.

00:57:52.811 --> 00:57:53.161
Right.

00:57:56.722 --> 00:58:05.661
And, uh, I, I noticed that a lot of the kids around me kept on like coming back from camp with like poison oak and poison ivy.

00:58:05.661 --> 00:58:08.402
And I'm like, I'm in boy scouts.

00:58:08.762 --> 00:58:10.132
I've gone camping.

00:58:10.461 --> 00:58:15.681
I've gone to I've gone into nature This is this has not happened to me.

00:58:15.702 --> 00:58:22.262
I need I need to know and then someone was saying Oh, yeah, a lot of hispanics They're immune to these type of things.

00:58:22.262 --> 00:58:23.931
I'm like, do I have a superpower?

00:58:24.442 --> 00:58:30.601
Like I I need a win right now And so, I found Poison Ivy in the backyard.

00:58:32.302 --> 00:58:36.061
Snatched that sucker barehanded, and I just started rubbing it.

00:58:36.692 --> 00:58:38.811
Like, I rubbed it on my face.

00:58:38.831 --> 00:58:40.351
Why would you rub it on your face?

00:58:40.641 --> 00:58:44.681
Dude, like a corner of like your arm, like, your arm doesn't have corners, but you know what I'm talking about.

00:58:44.681 --> 00:58:48.992
Like, just like a, I was just like, yeah, yeah, I'm just gonna, just, yeah, I'm amazing.

00:58:49.086 --> 00:58:49.907
Dude.

00:58:50.282 --> 00:58:53.275
And thankfully, it was just itchy a little bit.

00:58:53.375 --> 00:58:56.724
And like, I, I guess I, my immune system is high enough.

00:58:56.724 --> 00:58:56.784
Yeah.

00:58:57.010 --> 00:59:03.239
To tolerate that stuff, but I was way too confident, way too confident.

00:59:04.010 --> 00:59:07.739
Um, and it's, I lucked out, but it's just, it's just kind of funny.

00:59:07.739 --> 00:59:12.650
Cause that would have been a really rough day, a couple of days, like really rough.

00:59:13.079 --> 00:59:20.940
So like, you know, we do stuff, but it's cool to know what you can and cannot do.

00:59:21.429 --> 00:59:26.349
And, but at the same time, everybody's going to, you know, everybody's going to make their, take their chances, you know?

00:59:27.050 --> 00:59:28.139
Yeah, let him talk, dude.

00:59:28.139 --> 00:59:31.059
Let's rub some poison ivy on her, on us, and just to see what happens.

00:59:31.300 --> 00:59:33.570
Because, that, that's so funny, by the way.

00:59:33.570 --> 00:59:34.889
That's such, like, a kid thing.

00:59:34.969 --> 00:59:38.269
Like, a kid thought process of, like, I'm gonna, I'm gonna, I'm gonna test this.

00:59:38.349 --> 00:59:39.980
And see if I have superpowers.

00:59:40.360 --> 00:59:42.489
But, also, yeah, it got itchy.

00:59:43.000 --> 00:59:44.699
But, like, it wasn't as bad as it could have been.

00:59:44.710 --> 00:59:47.980
So, like, there are some superpowers there in the discovery.

00:59:48.150 --> 00:59:50.019
Even though the, the premise of it.

00:59:50.545 --> 00:59:51.284
It's very funny.

00:59:52.860 --> 00:59:53.190
Right?

00:59:53.239 --> 01:00:06.460
But you, but if I didn't do that, and if I put a little bit in the corner, I probably would have done a little bit more and more, and the time period of me finding out, right, that was, I, I, I legit fucked around, and I found out in a

01:00:06.625 --> 01:00:07.144
Mm hmm.

01:00:07.210 --> 01:00:22.829
but, but, you know, some people do a little by, by little, right, you, you dip your toes in the water, and it's like a little cold, you do like, five seconds of cold, and you're like, mmm, and I think, you, to really know, just go for it, in a smart way, not on your face,

01:00:22.885 --> 01:00:26.635
Well, here, here's an example of maybe not a smart way that I just did recently.

01:00:27.164 --> 01:00:31.625
Uh, so cold plunging, the first time I got in was because I was hungover.

01:00:31.715 --> 01:00:33.394
This is like a year and a half ago.

01:00:33.425 --> 01:00:40.994
So I'm like making these positive changes in my life, but like still reverting back to like some not great things, which I'm still doing, by the way.

01:00:40.994 --> 01:00:44.335
It's, it's just slowly making better decisions over time.

01:00:44.824 --> 01:00:49.054
Anyway, so I got in this really cold pool after a night of drinking and I felt great.

01:00:49.085 --> 01:00:56.985
It was like your story of like going through Like your body's like depleted and feeling really shitty and then you go through that and you're like, wow, I feel electric It feels great.

01:00:57.454 --> 01:01:04.914
So that's how I got put on to cold plunging I was living with my best friend for about two months and he didn't have a cold plunge.

01:01:05.005 --> 01:01:16.085
This is in texas So about once every week or so Maybe I would go just buy bags of ice and fill up the bathtub and do it And one day I was like, like, fuck this.

01:01:16.085 --> 01:01:17.164
I'm getting my money's worth.

01:01:17.644 --> 01:01:19.514
Like I got these bags of ice.

01:01:19.574 --> 01:01:21.244
I went and got it from the gas station.

01:01:21.605 --> 01:01:24.994
It was like 45 to get, I don't know, 15 bags.

01:01:25.025 --> 01:01:26.255
Like I'm going to get my money's worth.

01:01:26.735 --> 01:01:27.914
So I decided to push it.

01:01:27.914 --> 01:01:30.664
I was doing like five minute cold plunges, maybe like 10 maybe.

01:01:31.434 --> 01:01:34.784
And I, that was my first 30 minute cold plunge that I did that day.

01:01:35.184 --> 01:01:35.635
Yeah.

01:01:35.664 --> 01:01:37.675
And I was like, and it felt great when I was in it.

01:01:37.675 --> 01:01:42.385
I was like calm and collected and like listening to music and in flow.

01:01:42.385 --> 01:01:48.244
Um, And I got out and what I wasn't expecting was the come down on the back end.

01:01:48.565 --> 01:01:50.815
So it's summertime in Texas.

01:01:50.815 --> 01:01:52.784
It was like a hundred plus degrees.

01:01:52.804 --> 01:01:58.054
I am sitting outside in the sun and I felt like I was in Antarctica and no one else was home.

01:01:58.414 --> 01:02:00.755
And I was on the verge of like a panic attack.

01:02:02.184 --> 01:02:05.594
And I was like, did I just do like the dumbest thing?

01:02:06.025 --> 01:02:12.445
Ever, you know, like that was so stupid and it took me about 20 minutes to like, just focus on my breath.

01:02:12.545 --> 01:02:16.835
Like I had the intrusive thoughts of like, maybe I should call someone, like maybe I should call for help right now.

01:02:16.855 --> 01:02:23.655
Cause I don't know if I'm actually okay, but I settled down and it was fine and now I do 30 minute cold plunges.

01:02:23.695 --> 01:02:24.545
Like no problem.

01:02:24.644 --> 01:02:25.844
45 minute cold plunges.

01:02:26.215 --> 01:02:27.105
Like no problem.

01:02:27.375 --> 01:02:28.784
Because I know that I've been there.

01:02:29.085 --> 01:02:29.474
right.

01:02:29.804 --> 01:02:33.094
So it's just a con, it's just the confidence of the body knows what, what to do.

01:02:33.934 --> 01:02:42.525
The body, The body can overcome our, uh, monkey mind's decision to rub poison ivy on ourselves.

01:02:42.965 --> 01:02:44.994
Just by, you know, you just gotta trust it.

01:02:45.094 --> 01:02:47.485
And sometimes we take it a little bit too far, but that's okay.

01:02:48.405 --> 01:02:48.795
my God.

01:02:49.635 --> 01:02:50.864
Well, yeah, you survived.

01:02:50.894 --> 01:03:06.980
And, uh, those intrusive thoughts, you know, my thing I'm working on is not giving into those intrusive thoughts where I would add, I will call somebody and ask about something very simple and, and find out that like, I could have figured out myself.

01:03:07.480 --> 01:03:14.780
And that's one of those things where if you give into those intrusive thoughts, you, people will lose patience with you for sure.

01:03:14.960 --> 01:03:17.289
It'll take a little bit longer for them to pick up the phone.

01:03:17.300 --> 01:03:22.050
Maybe on like the fourth ring, it'll take a couple of hours before you get a text back.

01:03:22.829 --> 01:03:24.010
And I had to learn the hard way.

01:03:24.224 --> 01:03:29.905
And if you're, uh, if you remember the AOL, it's the messenger days, right?

01:03:29.994 --> 01:03:33.925
I remember texting people and then I would hear the door slam because that means they left the chat.

01:03:34.264 --> 01:03:34.905
Yes.

01:03:35.255 --> 01:03:41.465
So it's like, it was, and then I would learn how, how people can ghost each other.

01:03:42.804 --> 01:03:51.804
Oh man, if you don't know about AOL instant messenger, find a video and, and just learn how that, that world was like, because you can pretend like you're not available.

01:03:52.255 --> 01:03:56.324
Meanwhile, you are, and you can choose who sees you, who's not.

01:03:56.335 --> 01:03:57.065
And it was just funny.

01:03:57.065 --> 01:03:58.885
I'm like, wow, I guess no one's on today.

01:03:59.454 --> 01:04:01.375
But it could be just a lot of people hiding.

01:04:01.715 --> 01:04:02.065
With it.

01:04:02.065 --> 01:04:15.780
So if you give into those intrusive thoughts, you'll start to see people, you pushing people away because you, you give, You turn into that needy person and doing these things where you just go for it.

01:04:15.780 --> 01:04:16.050
Right?

01:04:16.070 --> 01:04:18.090
Like you did 30 minutes of cold plunging.

01:04:18.090 --> 01:04:19.289
You're like, I'm just going to sit with this.

01:04:19.309 --> 01:04:21.519
Could have been, could have been risky.

01:04:21.530 --> 01:04:22.380
You could have passed down.

01:04:22.389 --> 01:04:23.679
It could have been a bad situation.

01:04:24.019 --> 01:04:25.239
But it's one of those, like.

01:04:26.114 --> 01:04:38.565
I think and you tell me if I'm wrong as each time you do those each time you push yourself to the limit you're going to Gain more confidence in your capacity to deal with the unknown that leap of faith

01:04:39.414 --> 01:04:40.695
Yes, totally agree.

01:04:41.099 --> 01:04:45.570
Totally agree.

01:04:45.974 --> 01:04:46.505
my two minutes.

01:04:46.505 --> 01:04:48.885
I'm like Not enough, man

01:04:50.329 --> 01:04:51.739
And this is why the comparison

01:04:51.905 --> 01:04:52.875
Yeah, yeah exactly

01:04:53.710 --> 01:05:03.800
either comparing our successes and triumphs, or comparing our, uh, challenges, our shame, like, doesn't actually benefit anyone.

01:05:03.849 --> 01:05:12.510
And not to go too far into this one, but I think this is where veterans struggle, is because in the military we were trained to compare ourselves to others so quickly.

01:05:12.699 --> 01:05:22.065
Because we had to, we had to know who we could trust, and Who, uh, maybe was a weaker link in the unit when going, training for and going to war.

01:05:23.045 --> 01:05:31.255
Yet, like, it also can lead to this challenge where we, like, we don't, we feel like we don't rate our own pain.

01:05:31.375 --> 01:05:41.105
We don't rate our own discomfort because I haven't seen as much combat as that guy or I haven't done this and, like, that too can be very detrimental.

01:05:42.204 --> 01:05:49.914
Yes, there's a phrase for that and I forgot it, but it's, it's essentially, yeah, like don't compare your day two with their day 30.

01:05:50.394 --> 01:05:50.954
Right.

01:05:51.125 --> 01:05:52.074
Yeah, yeah.

01:05:52.255 --> 01:05:53.985
face value at that, at that point.

01:05:53.985 --> 01:05:54.985
So, wow.

01:05:55.034 --> 01:05:59.264
we are all on different versions of our day 30 and day 2 in different areas of our lives.

01:06:00.125 --> 01:06:04.985
You know what I was, what I was thinking though, as you were talking about AOL Instant Messenger, if I can go back to that one.

01:06:06.974 --> 01:06:09.224
One, what an awesome time.

01:06:09.835 --> 01:06:14.755
Two, it's incredible that the internet was invented not that long ago, right?

01:06:14.755 --> 01:06:21.275
Like I think it was like physicists at CERN in 1989 invented it to share information amongst themselves.

01:06:21.559 --> 01:06:33.320
And then not even 10 years later, we are in chat rooms and like, like for me, like middle schoolers in chat rooms with like the away messages and getting on there after school to jump in and like talk to my friends.

01:06:33.769 --> 01:06:42.079
And now it's just connecting with us and allowing us to share information in ways that is so intense.

01:06:42.099 --> 01:06:46.159
And this is only what, 35, 34 years.

01:06:47.594 --> 01:06:51.905
So that's why, like, yeah, let's, let's use this to our advantage.

01:06:51.934 --> 01:06:53.855
Let's be joyful.

01:06:53.985 --> 01:06:58.324
Let's see how valuable it is that we can order Uber Eats and we get any food we want delivered.

01:06:58.804 --> 01:07:03.614
And then let's also put the phone down and enjoy the meal with those at the table.

01:07:04.394 --> 01:07:04.704
Yeah.

01:07:04.775 --> 01:07:10.485
New challenges, new ways of managing.

01:07:10.840 --> 01:07:24.329
Yourself as we progress, and this conversation can completely change in the future as our lives change with web three, a I being more and more integrated.

01:07:24.920 --> 01:07:29.920
So lots of really good topics, lots of really cool wormholes.

01:07:29.920 --> 01:07:36.829
Is there anything any, I guess we've been chatting for a little bit, but is there something that was in the back of your mind where you wanted to make sure you got out before we finished today?

01:07:37.485 --> 01:07:39.224
I'm so curious in what web three is.

01:07:39.224 --> 01:07:41.735
Maybe we don't have time for that today, but I would love to learn.

01:07:42.425 --> 01:07:42.875
All right.

01:07:42.934 --> 01:07:43.065
All

01:07:43.250 --> 01:07:47.836
that's, web three is, is the crypto internet

01:07:48.382 --> 01:07:48.782
Oh,

01:07:48.896 --> 01:08:10.746
we're currently using web two, but it's because of going into web three, where you're using a completely different platform that we started to kind of reflect on, Oh, well, we're technically web two and web one, I believe was when the internet was like the wild, wild west, and there was no filters.

01:08:11.552 --> 01:08:16.992
now there's a lot of filters because only a few companies host the internet.

01:08:16.992 --> 01:08:19.542
And so we're all borrowing space.

01:08:19.591 --> 01:08:21.252
We're all renting space.

01:08:21.391 --> 01:08:23.521
No one owns their quote unquote home.

01:08:23.832 --> 01:08:24.962
Everybody has to rent space.

01:08:24.971 --> 01:08:31.992
So web three is kind of like you own a house, which is your site, and you don't pay for.

01:08:32.212 --> 01:08:33.091
Taxes,

01:08:33.856 --> 01:08:34.917
Oh, how do I get on

01:08:35.192 --> 01:08:35.542
right?

01:08:37.181 --> 01:08:42.822
Um, so you just less renting more owning so to speak you own your information.

01:08:43.396 --> 01:08:43.766
Hmm.

01:08:45.612 --> 01:08:55.942
The the simplest way there's so much more to it, but web3 is I think, yeah, yeah, I guess that's, that's a, that's a couple of episodes right there.

01:08:56.292 --> 01:08:57.481
yeah, it's getting interesting.

01:08:57.622 --> 01:08:59.671
We got a new world ahead of us.

01:09:00.261 --> 01:09:12.005
Things are moving a lot faster, but I think a lot of the things that we spoke about will help us manage it between, like you said, nature, being more present, jumping into that cold water, those leaps of faith.

01:09:12.297 --> 01:09:16.542
speaking of leaps of faith, speaking of being present, you're a presence.

01:09:17.734 --> 01:09:21.557
If anybody's looking to connect with you and say, Hey, you know what?

01:09:21.908 --> 01:09:23.217
I like what TJ is saying.

01:09:23.257 --> 01:09:24.238
I want to connect with him.

01:09:24.440 --> 01:09:26.297
What's the best way for people to connect with you?

01:09:27.021 --> 01:09:29.011
LinkedIn and Instagram, right now.

01:09:29.872 --> 01:09:32.421
Just connect there and I post occasionally.

01:09:33.030 --> 01:09:33.570
Easy.

01:09:34.166 --> 01:09:34.595
easy.

01:09:35.086 --> 01:09:36.636
Easy, just connect with me there.

01:09:37.180 --> 01:09:39.060
Well, I've, I had a blast.

01:09:39.070 --> 01:09:40.520
I did not expect this to go.

01:09:40.740 --> 01:09:43.171
I think we're like an hour and 10 minutes in.

01:09:43.171 --> 01:09:43.961
This is pretty cool.

01:09:44.530 --> 01:09:45.871
yeah, man, thanks for coming on.

01:09:45.961 --> 01:09:47.051
I enjoyed myself.

01:09:47.051 --> 01:09:48.360
I hope you enjoyed yourself, man.

01:09:48.461 --> 01:09:49.360
Totally, my friend.

01:09:49.360 --> 01:09:50.541
Thank you for having me on, John.

01:09:50.541 --> 01:09:51.091
It was awesome.
TJ Beaudette Profile Photo

TJ Beaudette

Presence Coach

US Marine Infantry Officer
Medical Device Sales Rep
Duke MBA
Presence Coach