Transcript
WEBVTT
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All right, welcome to the New Age Human Podcast.
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I'm your host, Jonathan Astacio.
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And today, we're talking with Alan Questel, who is known for his clarity, creativity, and down to earth style of teaching.
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Alan has taught Thousands of people in over 20 countries on five continents around the power of kindness and a unique physical movement called the Feldenkrais Method.
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Now, if you wanted to learn how to like yourself more, or hear more about being more consciously self aware and having more patience, and more importantly, what the heck is the Feldenkrais method, stick around to the very end.
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Now, before we begin, if you want to get alerted to future episodes on YouTube or any other video platform, I just ask that you like, and subscribe so you can get those alerts and at the same time, if you want to send some feedback and you want to.
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I don't know.
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Give me some ideas for future episodes or just tell me what you like or dislike.
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I would love to hear from you Just go to NewAgeHuman.
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com and on the contacts tab, just click it.
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And it goes straight to me.
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I read every email.
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Now, with that said, let's get to the show.
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Alan Questel, thank you for coming to the show.
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How's it going, man?
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It's going good and thanks so much for having me today.
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I, um, I appreciate you coming on.
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You have a very kind demeanor and down to earth, you know, you, you read someone's background and then what people say about them and you're like, well, let's see, let's meet the person.
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And I'm like, wow, they're spot on.
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so we're going to be, uh, I want to get to know you and why.
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You're doing your work.
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You say you love what you do.
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And for, for me, I know that, um, especially coming from New York, you're, you're, how are you the, the, the kindest person out there and you're from New York.
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Did you come from New York city?
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I mean, I had to get that out.
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I grew up in Manhattan and you know what I found is that New Yorkers really are kind.
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But the first approximation is like, no, we can't do it.
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But that's just like the surface of them.
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I've seen New Yorkers help people, do things for each other, hold the door, give people money and stuff.
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And it's just a fast paced place that has this reputation for being kind of tough.
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And it can be, but I don't think it's less kind than any place else.
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On the surface, like if you go to the south and everyone's like, how you doing?
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You're looking great.
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Nice to see you.
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I mean, New Yorkers don't do that so much.
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I understand that.
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But deep down, I think we're all kind.
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All of us.
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Every city.
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Hmm.
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Well, it's interesting because I have family in New York and I spent the first like five years of my life in.
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The Bronx area.
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Uh huh.
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And I just remember school was aggressive and I was in first grade thinking, I've got to get ready for these fights that I see every day at lunch.
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And then we moved to Connecticut in the suburbs.
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And I just remember me being shielded up because mentally I was already ready to For, you know, second grade,
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Right.
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you know, the, but because I guess as I got older or as I saw people get older in the school in New York, I saw them be more aggressive.
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And so that was my mental process of focus.
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Suburbs completely different story.
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If anything, they told me chill, chill, chill.
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They were just joking around.
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Have you seen that as you help work with people
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sure.
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I mean, like, you know, I grew up in Manhattan, in New York City, and when I moved to California first, everybody was so nice, I mistrusted it, you know?
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And then, I see a different capacity for that kinder interaction.
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In all the different countries I teach in, you know, like in Taiwan, people are just outgoing and friendly.
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In France, they're a little bit more reserved.
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In Sweden, they're, they're much more reserved, but kind.
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And in Colombia, they're just out there, you know.
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So it, it, it can be really different, and it's, for me, it's a question of kind of noticing that, and then saying, well, how do I meet the person who I want to talk to and be with?
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and you have your unique experience?
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I say unique because I'm speaking for myself.
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You've been to over 20 different countries.
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So of course you're
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No, no.
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I teach, I've taught in 20 different countries.
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I've been to about 40
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Oh my god.
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That's Okay, so you've been to twice the amount that I thought originally.
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Um, that's a lot of countries.
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So yeah, that's a lot of Change is a person.
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I I'm sure because if you don't leave your city or your state, you are going to assume that is the way it is.
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And you know, social media
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right.
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TV and they tell us what people are like.
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So I appreciate that from you.
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And it makes more sense how your energy comes across as being more grounded because you've seen more.
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You've met more people and it sounds like you've gotten past more of their, you know, What do you call it?
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That surface barrier, right?
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Everybody has like that surface shield.
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yeah,
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I want to get into first, what, why, why spend your life and a lot of your teaching and energy around helping people be more kind, why not something else?
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What made you go into that work?
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I'm very curious.
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it actually came from something else, and, but, but to, to, before I answer that part of the question, I would, I would just see one of the things that.
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Most interests me are things that are fundamental and that are cross cultural, right?
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So kindness is a value that I haven't met someone who doesn't value kindness, right?
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And then, you know, what I also talk about is being, creating a kinder world towards ourself and others, but also learning to like ourselves more and, and to be kind to ourselves, which is actually harder than being kind to others, I've found.
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For myself and for others.
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And so, my, my, my, uh, kind of journey into, into finding this idea and promoting it more, uh, is I teach something called the Feldenkrais Method, which is, excuse me, a movement technique that's based on learning theories, and I work with people with orthopedic and neurological problems, professional athletes, actors, dancers, and, uh, I help people with, with all kinds of pain or neurological problems, but also people who want to have a change in their self image, to become more who they wanted themselves to be.
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And there's two modalities within the Feldenkrais Method.
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There's a group class and a private work.
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And in the group class, the movements are done very slow and small so that you can increase your sensitivity and sense yourself more clearly.
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And after a while, you'll With this idea of reminding people to move more slowly, to move more gently with yourself, I started proposing the idea to move in a way that you like the way it feels.
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And of course, these movements are outside of the context of our everyday life.
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It's not like playing the violin or riding a bike where you're trying to achieve or get to a certain level.
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This is just to develop awareness of yourself.
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To improve functioning, to improve self image, to reduce pain, all those things.
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But that they're, they're kind of innocuous movements in the beginning.
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And I found something really interesting.
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That when people started moving in a way that they like the way it feels in that context, more and more continually, that it was like kind of entering the back door of who they were.
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And they started to like themselves more.
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I think one of the best moments I had in teaching that, I was teaching a program in Australia.
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And the programs that I teach are four years long, so it's a long time being with people.
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And at the graduation, when I handed each person their certificate, some of them hugged me and whispered in my ear, I like myself more.
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And I thought, that made it worthwhile for me.
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So, you know, my job there is to train people to become Feldenkrais practitioners.
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And Dr.
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Feldenkrais, when asked the question, Could you describe the method in one sentence, he said, Know thyself.
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So that's my job too, is to help people know themselves better.
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And then, what I've added on to that is what I'm talking about as part of my job, is to help people like themselves more.
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And if that's all they came away with after four years, That's pretty significant.
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And that's fundamental, right?
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And so, how did that lead me to kindness?
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Well, it happened, two things really.
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One was kind of inadvertent that I did some act of kindness.
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I can't even recall what it was.
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And in the next moment, I realized I like myself more.
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And I realized, and I'm not suggesting we just do acts of kindness so we can pat ourselves on the back and like ourselves more.
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But that kindness There was a result of doing that action towards another, with another, that helped me like myself more.
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So liking myself is more intrapersonal, and being kind with others is more interpersonal.
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And I've found that it's so fundamental to who we are as human beings.
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Like, you know, like I said, I travel a lot, I've never been in a culture where people don't want more kindness.
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or they don't want to like themselves more.
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And I don't know why that happens, but
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Yeah, yeah the the bubbles
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the bubbles, I can't control them.
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For anybody listening, um when you put your thumb up and you have like a macbook, you know what happens the bubbles We're starting to see it more.
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It's like an automatic feature.
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But then I try to do it on purpose.
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Yeah, right Try two thumbs up
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No?
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yes, see it It has a mind of its own.
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I really like the know thy self part and I feel a lot of people Are challenged with that as in seeking outwardly for information about yourself, which is interesting I blame school and the other part i'm actually very curious.
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What kind of movements are we talking about with Feldenkrais is it i'm thinking of like someone i'm thinking of a weird extreme Where you're doing these, uh, the movements of not like a samurai, but where you have like the ebb and flow of energy where you have someone standing.
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Are you, are you on like the rocks with people on the ocean side and the breeze?
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And you're just kind of flowing with nature or like, what does it look like?
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Well, the first thing is that it's interesting that you have this martial arts image because Dr.
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Feldenkrais was one of the first Westerners to get a black belt in Judo.
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Nice.
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physicist, an engineer, a mathematician, and he developed his work through his own injuries.
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He destroyed his knees playing soccer as a young man.
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And they said they could operate, but there was a 50 percent chance he wouldn't walk.
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And he said, well, that's crazy.
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And he became his own laboratory.
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So, in a sense, He came to know himself better, as you just proposed.
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And the thing about knowing ourselves more, it's like, I'm not talking about knowing ourselves in terms of, well I like chocolate ice cream and vanilla ice cream, and knowing, that's how I know myself.
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Those are all good things to know about ourselves.
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But to really come to know ourselves more, really what we have to be able to discover are the blind spots in ourselves that we don't know.
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And so the movements in the Feldenkrais Method are very subtle.
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And I started to say before that doing a smaller, slower movement affords us a greater sense of sensitivity.
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And this has actually been studied.
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It's called the Weber Fechner Law.
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That when we reduce the stimulus, we increase the sensitivity.
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So now, if I was to show you a movement, a movement in the Feldenkrais Method, if I said, okay, bring your elbow and your knee towards each other, it's not like that, trying to muscle through it or do the biggest movement.
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It's actually Towards each other, so that as I do that, I can direct someone's attention, because first their attention is on their elbow and their knee.
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But if I said, but when you do that, feel what's your chest doing.
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Where do your eyes go?
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Watch.
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If I look up, it changes the movement.
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If I look towards it, it changes the movement.
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So, we try to include more and more of the self in these slow movements, and again, reminding people to move in a way that they like the way it feels.
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Which is a funny question because when I ask that, are you moving in a way that you like the way it feels?
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Many people discover, no I'm not.
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I'm trying to achieve something.
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So it's a very different context for learning about ourselves through movement.
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And the idea of movement, we can look at it in terms of different aspects of our self image, of who we are, who we can know.
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So there's our thinking.
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Our feeling, our sensing, and our movement, our actions.
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And a change in any one is the potential to change the others.
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If I change how I think, it can change how I feel.
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If I change how I sense, it can change how I think.
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The thing about movement is that it's immediate and concrete.
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I know it in that moment.
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And then I can use it in my everyday life.
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And, you know, I started talking about this idea of moving in a way that we like the way it feels.
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It's not just in these Feldenkrais Lessons, that's the practice in our everyday life.
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In my, in my book on kindness, I have a part about moving in a way that you like the way it feels.
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There's a way of being kinder to yourself.
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And I'm not suggesting all the time.
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I mean that when you get up and go to the, go to the bathroom or go to get a drink of water, just to feel what's the quality of how am I moving.
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Because we don't pay attention to ourselves in those contexts very much.
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And I'm not suggesting dancing to the bathroom, you know.
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Or anything silly like that.
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that is the, what makes you feel good?
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Yeah.
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You know, it's interesting.
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A couple of things kept popping up.
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One, the whole thought process of moving in a way that makes you feel good.
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Well, first you gotta figure out what feels good.
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And I feel A lot of times we don't take the time to just stop,
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Yeah.
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right?
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I don't, I do a lot of movement that doesn't make me feel good.
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If I'm moving stuff out of the car and I try to put everything in one hand and I'm like, I have that extra pinky, it doesn't feel good.
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And I did notice that.
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out of need and necessity for, uh, time crunch.
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And this needs to get done now, now, now, yesterday, yesterday, yesterday, you start to sacrifice a lot of what feels good to you.
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And on those days where I, let's just say I have an open schedule, I do things, I'll take two trips to the car instead of trying to put everything in my hands and like twist my arm.
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back and spine to balance.
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And it's interesting how much that changes your, just your overall being.
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And the other thing, did you want to say something about that?
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Oh, I could say a lot about that.
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Yeah.
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So if you think of a kid drawing, right, a kid sitting on the floor drawing and they're sitting this way and then they're here and then they're that way and they're moving around and you never hear the kid get up and say, Oh mommy, I have a stiff hip
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Right.
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because they're regulating themselves through their state of comfort.
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And we've learned as adults to inhibit that to a high degree, actually, because we have to get things done, like you were saying, right?
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And so I can ask you a question.
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It's a question I ask a lot, which is, and it's a simple question.
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It's a simple answer, I think.
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It's like, when do you decide to get comfortable?
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When I am going to do something big, that's going to require a lot of energy.
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Yeah, but let's say you're in the act already.
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What makes you decide to get comfortable?
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Oh, when I'm not worried about the outcome.
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Well, yeah, but I think the more common answer is, I decide to get comfortable when I'm uncomfortable.
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Well, that's, yes, that's the obvious.
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That's the obvious, I know.
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That's the, yeah,
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if you think about that, if you think about that, that's actually a really crazy criteria.
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That means I don't get comfortable until I'm uncomfortable.
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As opposed to posing the question, as I'm doing something, am I comfortable?
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Yeah.
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Could I be more comfortable?
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Yeah, I can.
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Right?
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So we can shift the continuum from the negative end of it, more and more positive.
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Because, even as I'm sitting here now, if I really think for a moment, I can make a small adjustment and now I'm more comfortable.
00:17:43.489 --> 00:17:44.959
And I was comfortable, right?
00:17:45.229 --> 00:17:56.209
But if that becomes the ongoing criteria in our daily lives, that idea of feeling like I have to get something done has a different quality to it.
00:17:56.229 --> 00:18:05.719
Because I have that, I get, I need to get things done, but maybe I don't need to do it by stressing myself out, right?
00:18:05.729 --> 00:18:15.568
Maybe I can use, I can regulate and monitor myself through a quality of feeling in what I do That feels easier and builds and grows.
00:18:16.868 --> 00:18:17.519
It's interesting.
00:18:17.519 --> 00:18:28.459
My mind is like having a hard time processing, like outside of, um, getting comfortable outside of the need to get comfortable because you're uncomfortable.
00:18:28.509 --> 00:18:35.179
As in, I think I personally have regulated that to be an automatic thing,
00:18:35.548 --> 00:18:36.118
That's good.
00:18:37.068 --> 00:18:37.858
but, but.