Double Snack with Blair St. Clair

WEBVTT 1 00:00:01.320 --> 00:00:05.200 Hey, what's up world? Welcome to snack size, the podcast that will 2 00:00:05.240 --> 00:00:09.949 drag you into your most fabulous life. I'm your host, Lalla Lushes, 3 00:00:10.189 --> 00:00:13.949 also known as the snack of the twin cities. I decided for myself that 4 00:00:14.029 --> 00:00:16.910 I can be whatever I want to be. So I decided to be a 5 00:00:17.070 --> 00:00:20.750 drag queen, and if I can live my dreams, you can to. 6 00:00:21.149 --> 00:00:25.300 The time has come to believing yourself enough to turn your ideas into more than 7 00:00:25.339 --> 00:00:28.300 mere words. And, no matter what you were doing in life or where 8 00:00:28.379 --> 00:00:31.980 you want to go, I want to help you get there fabulously. Our 9 00:00:32.100 --> 00:01:15.310 double snack episode starts now. Hey snacks, that was the latest single from 10 00:01:15.349 --> 00:01:19.620 our special double snack guests today, called empty. This guess is an American 11 00:01:19.700 --> 00:01:23.980 singer and drag queen who you watch on Rupaul's drag race season ten, and 12 00:01:25.219 --> 00:01:29.620 now you will be watching her on Rupaul's drag race all stars five. In 13 00:01:29.819 --> 00:01:34.129 addition to drag this diva to the world by storm as a recording artist with 14 00:01:34.290 --> 00:01:37.650 our first album, call my life, which peaked at number one on the 15 00:01:37.769 --> 00:01:42.450 billboard electronic dance charts. I do declare our guests today is Blair St Clair. 16 00:01:42.769 --> 00:01:49.599 Let's give her a call. Hi, Blair, welcome to snack sighs. 17 00:01:49.200 --> 00:01:52.239 Hey, thanks so much for having me and thinking of me. I 18 00:01:52.359 --> 00:01:56.079 am so excited to have you here with us today. For those listening, 19 00:01:56.200 --> 00:01:59.560 Blair and I know each other because we were both drag Queens and Indiana, 20 00:01:59.920 --> 00:02:02.390 and I think that our last show was either three or four years ago when 21 00:02:02.430 --> 00:02:07.790 we performed at my college in Crawfordsville, Indiana. So it's been a while 22 00:02:07.829 --> 00:02:10.110 since we've caught up. Let me know how you are and what's going on 23 00:02:10.229 --> 00:02:14.229 in Blair's world today. Oh my gosh. First of all, was that 24 00:02:14.270 --> 00:02:17.580 at Wabash we perform, seriously, the last time we work together? Yeah, 25 00:02:17.659 --> 00:02:20.419 that was the last time we work together. You know what, I 26 00:02:20.780 --> 00:02:23.099 did come see you when you were in Minneapolis, so at least I got 27 00:02:23.139 --> 00:02:28.300 to see you, and you've grown so much and thank you crazy thank you 28 00:02:28.419 --> 00:02:31.490 so much that. Well, Wabash was just asn't and seventeen and you must 29 00:02:31.490 --> 00:02:36.250 have seen me into Thousan like. I guess maybe nineteen or and now it's 30 00:02:36.250 --> 00:02:38.569 twenty five. What? Way Too long. It's been way too long. 31 00:02:38.729 --> 00:02:40.849 You know, it was a really interesting time for both of us because you 32 00:02:40.969 --> 00:02:46.759 were getting ready to go on Rupole's drag race and I was actually leaving Indiana 33 00:02:46.840 --> 00:02:50.639 to move to Minneapolis, and one of the things that has been so inspiring 34 00:02:50.800 --> 00:02:53.639 for me is following your journey and seeing how well you've been doing, and 35 00:02:53.840 --> 00:02:58.080 it in turn, has inspired me to do well here in my city. 36 00:02:58.400 --> 00:03:00.310 So thank you so much. I'm so proud of you. Well, thank 37 00:03:00.349 --> 00:03:05.069 you. I mean to answer your question of what's going on in my life 38 00:03:05.069 --> 00:03:08.270 right now. First of all, I hope you are staying happy, healthy, 39 00:03:08.310 --> 00:03:13.219 safe. I hope you're staying at home, because, girl, I 40 00:03:13.539 --> 00:03:15.419 hope everyone stays home so I can go back out the clubs. So we 41 00:03:15.500 --> 00:03:20.300 call okay, doing our gigs again, but it's points and yes, but 42 00:03:20.620 --> 00:03:23.139 in my life today I've just been trying to stay busy. I started a 43 00:03:23.219 --> 00:03:28.009 little mini wig business. It's called here by Blair. Yeah, so that's 44 00:03:28.009 --> 00:03:30.129 been keeping me busy and happy at home, to keep me doing something during 45 00:03:30.169 --> 00:03:34.370 the day at home, and I've just been trying to keep the hustle going. 46 00:03:34.610 --> 00:03:38.169 How about you? I'm doing really well. Like you, I'm not 47 00:03:38.370 --> 00:03:43.520 performing right now, but because of that I've began this new journey into podcasting 48 00:03:43.639 --> 00:03:47.360 and it's been an amazing experience. So you and I started together and the 49 00:03:47.479 --> 00:03:52.240 boot camp of drag which is Indiana, and I want to take you back 50 00:03:52.360 --> 00:03:55.710 to right after you had one mis Gay Indiana, which is an annual pageant 51 00:03:55.750 --> 00:04:00.750 for drag queens that occurs every year within the state of Indiana. You and 52 00:04:00.830 --> 00:04:04.389 I were talking and you said that you were struggling with the pressure of people's 53 00:04:04.469 --> 00:04:10.219 expectations. One of the things I discussed on this podcast is how people and 54 00:04:10.379 --> 00:04:15.620 societies expectations can really affect us when it comes to living a happy and fulfilled 55 00:04:15.659 --> 00:04:17.459 life. So I want to start by talking a little bit about how you 56 00:04:17.540 --> 00:04:21.100 were able to push out that negativity and get to where you are now. 57 00:04:21.459 --> 00:04:25.129 You know, it's so much easier send than done. So many people so 58 00:04:25.250 --> 00:04:29.449 many times and say to block out the pressures of everybody else, and you 59 00:04:29.610 --> 00:04:32.370 just do you and I honestly would love to say that it's been an easy 60 00:04:32.370 --> 00:04:35.050 journey and it's been an easy ride and that I just said, you know 61 00:04:35.089 --> 00:04:36.889 what, I'm going to do what I want to do and I went for 62 00:04:38.009 --> 00:04:42.279 it. But that's not really what happened. I feel like what really kind 63 00:04:42.279 --> 00:04:46.800 of propelled me and was push me to find where I am today is I 64 00:04:46.920 --> 00:04:50.600 took little mini steps to like finding what I wanted to do and how to 65 00:04:50.680 --> 00:04:53.829 get there, and it just kind of was like, I don't really know 66 00:04:53.870 --> 00:04:56.149 what I want to do. It's kind of like a senior in high school 67 00:04:56.149 --> 00:04:57.910 and they're saying, Hey, what do you want to do? What's your 68 00:04:57.910 --> 00:05:00.149 major and where you're going to school? You have no idea, and so 69 00:05:00.310 --> 00:05:02.149 I kind of thought about that the same way. I was like, you 70 00:05:02.230 --> 00:05:08.699 know what, I'm not planning for my biggest career move today. I'm just 71 00:05:08.899 --> 00:05:12.139 going to do what makes me happy today and keep doing whatever makes me happy 72 00:05:12.180 --> 00:05:15.180 or brings me joy and start trying those things little by a little and eventually, 73 00:05:15.420 --> 00:05:19.500 like setting small goals and a couple large goals that I can maybe attain 74 00:05:20.019 --> 00:05:24.889 that were realistic. I kind of was able to find this way of being 75 00:05:24.970 --> 00:05:27.930 able to do what makes me happy that I'm doing today. You have been 76 00:05:27.970 --> 00:05:30.449 very open about the ups and downs in your life. I was actually reading 77 00:05:30.490 --> 00:05:36.079 an article on billboardcom and you said it's just amazing and so empowering that I'm 78 00:05:36.079 --> 00:05:41.000 able to turn those negative experience in my life into love today, and that 79 00:05:41.160 --> 00:05:45.120 in itself has just been an amazing, incredible journey for me. Can you 80 00:05:45.319 --> 00:05:48.759 talk about those challenges and how you have turned them into positives? I went 81 00:05:48.879 --> 00:05:51.709 through this really dark place in my life where I was just mad, I 82 00:05:51.829 --> 00:05:57.870 was angry, when I'm through always like different stages of grief, and I 83 00:05:57.990 --> 00:06:00.189 had to have someone tell me that you have to feel those emotions, you 84 00:06:00.269 --> 00:06:05.579 have to let live those emotions and get through those emotions to find happiness, 85 00:06:05.620 --> 00:06:09.980 or else you'll never be happy. So, instead of me looking at situations 86 00:06:10.060 --> 00:06:15.620 and they've happened to me in the past, of trauma or feeling like I, 87 00:06:15.300 --> 00:06:17.339 you know, wasn't good enough for a feeling like I was robbed the 88 00:06:17.379 --> 00:06:20.970 situations or even drag race, instead of saying I wish I'd made it to 89 00:06:21.050 --> 00:06:25.290 the end, I wish I'd won it said, I've started saying, wow, 90 00:06:25.329 --> 00:06:30.449 I'm so proud of the accomplishment that I made within myself to go film 91 00:06:30.449 --> 00:06:32.639 a national television, to put myself out in a raw, vulnerable state, 92 00:06:33.000 --> 00:06:36.360 and I did that and wow, you should cheer yourself on. That's amazing 93 00:06:36.439 --> 00:06:40.160 itself. You should be really proud of yourself. You know, there are 94 00:06:40.319 --> 00:06:42.839 things that have happened to me in the past that I've looked at and I've 95 00:06:42.879 --> 00:06:46.189 said, you know what, it's not my fault that I felt trauma or 96 00:06:46.269 --> 00:06:50.750 that I felt victimized, and instead of saying I'm a victim, I started 97 00:06:50.790 --> 00:06:55.709 saying I'm a survivor, and I think that's what helped. Wow, that 98 00:06:56.149 --> 00:07:00.310 is absolutely beautiful. Taking back the power that negative situations can have over you 99 00:07:00.620 --> 00:07:05.220 is so hard to do, but it's essential to finding happiness and success in 100 00:07:05.339 --> 00:07:10.420 life. Speaking of drag race, when you were on the show, Ross 101 00:07:10.500 --> 00:07:14.060 Matthews had to critique you and he said that he didn't understand you, and 102 00:07:14.180 --> 00:07:17.089 I know that was something you really took to heart. But now it is 103 00:07:17.329 --> 00:07:21.209 very clear to the world that you understand who you are today. I'd love 104 00:07:21.290 --> 00:07:25.089 to hear about out how you found your sense of self and the work you 105 00:07:25.209 --> 00:07:29.129 did to find that after hearing that critique. What Ross Matthews said, and 106 00:07:29.329 --> 00:07:32.120 I never heard it in person, I watched it on TV because this is 107 00:07:32.160 --> 00:07:35.000 when the judges were talking. And what Ross says, what about me? 108 00:07:35.160 --> 00:07:40.160 He said I don't think she's fully baked, like I don't think she is 109 00:07:40.600 --> 00:07:43.959 fully there. She's fully ready, she's got all that it takes, but 110 00:07:44.240 --> 00:07:46.589 just not right now. What initially took it in. I was upset and 111 00:07:46.670 --> 00:07:49.750 I was like that's not true, I I had what it takes. And 112 00:07:49.829 --> 00:07:51.509 then I thought about it. I was like, you need to remove your 113 00:07:51.550 --> 00:07:57.110 ego from his comment and actually analyze it. And he said nothing against me, 114 00:07:57.589 --> 00:08:00.259 he just said it wasn't ready yet. So I thought, okay, 115 00:08:00.660 --> 00:08:03.500 what is it that's maybe not ready? And I was like maybe I just 116 00:08:03.579 --> 00:08:05.019 need to rebrand a little bit and I need to find out who I really 117 00:08:05.060 --> 00:08:11.180 am. So I sat down and I started thinking about my drag and, 118 00:08:11.300 --> 00:08:13.850 you know, coming from Indiana, were kind of told how drag is supposed 119 00:08:13.889 --> 00:08:18.490 to be and and you do this, that and the other, and that's 120 00:08:18.490 --> 00:08:20.769 what we'll let you go on stage. And I feel like when I was 121 00:08:20.930 --> 00:08:22.449 kind of starting in drag, I was told that, you know, my 122 00:08:22.569 --> 00:08:24.970 makeup, for instance, was supposed to look a certain way. So I 123 00:08:26.050 --> 00:08:26.560 was like, you know, what I'm going to do, I want to 124 00:08:26.600 --> 00:08:33.320 do and what I want my face to be is to be as genetically female 125 00:08:33.480 --> 00:08:37.279 looking as possible. I really wanted to reflect what I love about Dragon, 126 00:08:37.320 --> 00:08:41.789 that is the art of female and personation for me. For me, that's 127 00:08:41.830 --> 00:08:45.350 what I love about drag. So it's like, how can I make that 128 00:08:45.470 --> 00:08:48.230 the biggest that and best I can be. So I started like reaching out 129 00:08:48.230 --> 00:08:50.909 to make up artist and I was like teach me more things as of watching 130 00:08:50.909 --> 00:08:54.230 more videos, I started going to dance class regularly, I started going to 131 00:08:54.269 --> 00:09:00.500 acting classes regularly and took Improv I took film acting versus like theater acting, 132 00:09:00.899 --> 00:09:03.379 and I just started like engulfing myself into everything and I was just like, 133 00:09:03.419 --> 00:09:05.379 I'm a sponge, I'm going to set my ego aside for everything and just 134 00:09:05.500 --> 00:09:09.940 learn and I'm going to take tons of criticism in a positive way. So 135 00:09:09.980 --> 00:09:13.610 it's all positive criticism and just think, how can I make myself better and 136 00:09:13.649 --> 00:09:16.529 better and better, because I want to be the absolute best, and that 137 00:09:16.769 --> 00:09:20.250 is so important to living a happy and successful life. You always have to 138 00:09:20.370 --> 00:09:24.000 be working, because once you would take your dream, you may have another 139 00:09:24.120 --> 00:09:26.320 one, right, and what you're going to have to do is know how 140 00:09:26.360 --> 00:09:30.799 to mold and change to be able to meet that dream. Yes, everything 141 00:09:30.840 --> 00:09:33.279 leads to our next thing. It's really a building process. I'm so glad 142 00:09:33.279 --> 00:09:37.279 you said that, because at first I thought my dream was going to drag 143 00:09:37.320 --> 00:09:39.350 race and then I did and I was like, well, what am I 144 00:09:39.389 --> 00:09:41.549 going to do now? So I had just set new dreams and I was 145 00:09:41.669 --> 00:09:46.269 talking with Miss Fame and I said, uh, I hate looking back at 146 00:09:46.269 --> 00:09:48.789 some of the pictures. I was like, I look and I say like, 147 00:09:48.909 --> 00:09:50.669 what the heck was I thinking, like why did I do? I 148 00:09:50.750 --> 00:09:52.299 make up what I was wearing that outfit? Why did I do my hair 149 00:09:52.379 --> 00:09:56.500 like that? And she said, girl, you got to stop. She's 150 00:09:56.539 --> 00:09:58.700 like you have to look at those moments and be grateful for them, because 151 00:09:58.740 --> 00:10:01.779 if you hadn't had that moment, you wouldn't be where you are today. 152 00:10:03.019 --> 00:10:05.620 And she also said, and you know what, today, as you're talking 153 00:10:05.620 --> 00:10:07.129 to me, you're going to look back at a picture from today and think, 154 00:10:07.289 --> 00:10:11.129 girl, what was I thinking? And she said and she said that's 155 00:10:11.129 --> 00:10:15.330 because you're growing and it's and if you're not growing then you should just stop, 156 00:10:15.450 --> 00:10:18.529 because the ability to grow is, honestly, what's going to make you 157 00:10:18.610 --> 00:10:22.200 amazing. Another struggle you've discussed publicly is some ups and downs with your family, 158 00:10:22.279 --> 00:10:26.120 particularly your mother. For the listeners who may be having their own struggles 159 00:10:26.159 --> 00:10:30.399 with family, can you tell me a little bit about those challenges and how 160 00:10:30.440 --> 00:10:35.629 your relationship is today? It's so interesting because for the longest time I was 161 00:10:35.669 --> 00:10:41.029 searching for the validation of so many people because I was so insecure and I 162 00:10:41.070 --> 00:10:43.389 didn't know that that what was going on the back of my mind. So 163 00:10:43.549 --> 00:10:46.830 not only did I want the validation of my mother, but I also wanted 164 00:10:46.830 --> 00:10:50.340 the validation of the world. And then, slowly but surely, I started 165 00:10:50.460 --> 00:10:56.820 receiving, obviously, more and more validation of comments and subscribers and people being 166 00:10:56.860 --> 00:11:03.379 in my life, and my life overnight changed drastically and I realized that what 167 00:11:03.539 --> 00:11:07.009 I was seeking for so long was this validation of other people. Once I 168 00:11:07.090 --> 00:11:11.850 had it, nothing within me changed and I finally kind of decided that I 169 00:11:13.049 --> 00:11:18.639 needed to love me first for myself to really feel that that sense of happiness 170 00:11:18.720 --> 00:11:22.840 and sense of self worth. And my mom did the same thing for me, 171 00:11:24.360 --> 00:11:30.559 like I so badly needed my parents to validate who I was and my 172 00:11:30.759 --> 00:11:33.230 career and my choices and what I've done. And even having that, I 173 00:11:33.429 --> 00:11:41.230 realized that I needed that, but for me specifically. Until I accepted their 174 00:11:41.350 --> 00:11:45.990 love and their validation and choosing to love myself first, that's the first time 175 00:11:46.070 --> 00:11:50.179 when I started feeling wow, I'm doing okay. For me, it was 176 00:11:50.220 --> 00:11:52.940 all about telling myself you are good enough and you have to believe that and 177 00:11:54.059 --> 00:11:58.659 you are strong enough and you are good looking enough and smart enough and good 178 00:11:58.700 --> 00:12:01.649 enough for this world. One day I kind of woke up and I started 179 00:12:01.730 --> 00:12:03.970 believing that, little by little, and that for me and my journey was 180 00:12:05.049 --> 00:12:09.049 like when everything changed. Would you say it was more like a fake until 181 00:12:09.090 --> 00:12:11.769 you make it type thing, where it's like, you know, today I'm 182 00:12:11.769 --> 00:12:15.289 going to try to believe in myself and then eat. The more and more 183 00:12:15.370 --> 00:12:18.559 you did it, the more and more it became real. Absolutely I'd be 184 00:12:18.559 --> 00:12:20.320 lying to you if I told you I'm so secure with myself today. I 185 00:12:20.639 --> 00:12:24.080 love myself fully. Today, I am have my life together today, because 186 00:12:24.120 --> 00:12:26.559 that's not true and it never will be true, and that's okay. I've 187 00:12:26.559 --> 00:12:31.990 accepted that fact because I've become selfaware enough to know that I'm going to have 188 00:12:31.190 --> 00:12:33.870 ebb and flows in life and instead of having, like writing, a roller 189 00:12:33.870 --> 00:12:37.149 coaster were I'm super high and Super Low, I try to now, I 190 00:12:37.269 --> 00:12:41.629 know this is such a dad joke, but I try to like ride the 191 00:12:41.669 --> 00:12:46.019 Lasagnian noodle where just like it's like a little tiny ebbs and flows instead of 192 00:12:46.019 --> 00:12:48.820 those really big ones. So I have different coping mechanisms today. So if 193 00:12:48.820 --> 00:12:52.580 I'm feeling down or not able to like fake it until I make it, 194 00:12:52.659 --> 00:12:54.419 I call someone and be like Hey, I'm feeling this way. I got 195 00:12:54.500 --> 00:12:56.940 to be honest, I gotta let you know I'm upset. I saw this 196 00:12:58.019 --> 00:13:00.250 comment somewhere, it hurt me or this or that and the other, and 197 00:13:00.370 --> 00:13:01.809 someone has to kind of shake me a little bit, get me back to 198 00:13:03.049 --> 00:13:05.529 my roots in the to where I was, and that helps so much, 199 00:13:05.529 --> 00:13:09.250 because then it a broken brain can't fix itself. So if you're kind of 200 00:13:09.289 --> 00:13:11.610 in this Rut, you can't necessarily always talk yourself out of it. You 201 00:13:11.649 --> 00:13:13.559 got to reach out and that helps me the most. Do you read the 202 00:13:13.639 --> 00:13:18.960 comments? Um, I love to say I didn't, but sometimes I do. 203 00:13:18.159 --> 00:13:20.519 Yeah, it's yes and no. So if it's something that I put 204 00:13:20.559 --> 00:13:22.919 out, like content that I'm really proud of, I want to see that 205 00:13:24.000 --> 00:13:26.950 other people like it too. But then you you're going to get those hateful 206 00:13:28.029 --> 00:13:30.950 comments if they're going to be there, and I have to sit back and 207 00:13:31.029 --> 00:13:33.549 remind myself. Okay, I'm proud of what I did, I like what 208 00:13:33.629 --> 00:13:37.990 I did and I'm just going to delete the comment. If it's negative, 209 00:13:37.990 --> 00:13:39.950 I delete it. It's out of sight, out of mind, and it's 210 00:13:39.950 --> 00:13:41.860 no longer there. I struggle a lot but the same types of things in 211 00:13:41.980 --> 00:13:45.700 my life, and one of the ways I deal with it is that I 212 00:13:45.860 --> 00:13:48.899 focus my energy on things that are going to help me grow. It's really 213 00:13:48.940 --> 00:13:54.259 important to surround yourself with activities and people that fill your cup and not take 214 00:13:54.340 --> 00:13:56.730 from it. And there's the other end too, is like, who is 215 00:13:56.809 --> 00:13:58.769 making this comment? Why is their opinion of me more important than my own 216 00:13:58.769 --> 00:14:03.090 opinion of me? Exactly? I have to ask myself that could question when 217 00:14:03.090 --> 00:14:05.090 I could be a hundred positive comments in a room, but it takes just 218 00:14:05.210 --> 00:14:09.519 that one negative one and you know, for some reason I'm like why do 219 00:14:09.720 --> 00:14:15.240 why do I think about that one? And it's because that one comment didn't 220 00:14:15.240 --> 00:14:18.320 want to validate me, and that's the problem. It's like, Whoa, 221 00:14:18.600 --> 00:14:20.320 I don't need that. I need to remember that all I need is me 222 00:14:20.679 --> 00:14:24.470 and if I liked it, that's all that matters. I'd love for you 223 00:14:24.509 --> 00:14:28.909 to talk about how your drag and your music and all your creativity helps you 224 00:14:28.029 --> 00:14:31.830 the happy and successful life and how those things reflect who you are today. 225 00:14:33.350 --> 00:14:37.029 It's changed so much because originally I went into everything that I was doing as 226 00:14:37.269 --> 00:14:39.860 thinking like hey, you want to grow, you want to learn, because 227 00:14:39.860 --> 00:14:45.419 there are obviously professionals around you all the time. So I would always have 228 00:14:45.539 --> 00:14:48.820 my opinion but kind of not speak it fully because I would think like, 229 00:14:48.019 --> 00:14:52.299 oh, I don't necessarily agree with them, but obviously they are, let's 230 00:14:52.340 --> 00:14:54.929 say, photographers. Obviously there a photographer. They know what they're talking about. 231 00:14:54.929 --> 00:14:56.330 It's their profession. I'm going to listen to them because they know. 232 00:14:56.450 --> 00:15:01.769 But I actually have gotten bit in the ass so many times for doing it, 233 00:15:01.009 --> 00:15:03.769 because I didn't just listen to my gut and I've realized I was like, 234 00:15:03.769 --> 00:15:07.600 I might not be a professional photographer her instance, but I do know 235 00:15:07.679 --> 00:15:11.039 what I like, and so I used to kind of a sit back and 236 00:15:11.600 --> 00:15:13.519 let others steer the wheel, and now I feel like I'm in full control 237 00:15:13.600 --> 00:15:16.039 in the driver's seat and I tell People Mc no, I don't like that, 238 00:15:16.320 --> 00:15:18.559 or yes, I do like that, or it's not all the way 239 00:15:18.639 --> 00:15:24.070 there. I'm looking for this, and my drags, esthetic and character has 240 00:15:24.149 --> 00:15:28.590 changed so much because I think now it's exactly what I want it to be 241 00:15:30.230 --> 00:15:33.309 and I'm in control. Finally, now let me ask you. Did you 242 00:15:33.549 --> 00:15:37.100 have other dreams, of goals? Before you found dry Oh yes, actually, 243 00:15:37.100 --> 00:15:39.059 I found drag because of my initial dreaming goal, which was to be 244 00:15:39.100 --> 00:15:43.700 on Broadway, and then I was cast in a musical called Lakaja fall as 245 00:15:43.740 --> 00:15:48.259 a drag queen and I had never done drag, I never watch drag race, 246 00:15:48.299 --> 00:15:50.610 I didn't know much about drag culture, but it was that show that 247 00:15:50.690 --> 00:15:52.769 taught me all about dragon, what it was about and where it's from, 248 00:15:52.889 --> 00:15:56.289 and I was just like, this is such a special art. This, 249 00:15:56.610 --> 00:15:58.370 I think, is what I want to do. So correct me if I'm 250 00:15:58.409 --> 00:16:03.929 wrong. Before all the driveway stuff happened, you had started doing drag full 251 00:16:03.009 --> 00:16:07.159 time for a little bit. Right. Yes, I had. So when 252 00:16:07.320 --> 00:16:11.080 you decided to do drag full time and make it your career, do you 253 00:16:11.240 --> 00:16:15.039 remember that moment and what was your biggest fear at that time, and have 254 00:16:15.240 --> 00:16:18.279 you overcome it and how did you do it? Yeah, I knew that 255 00:16:18.399 --> 00:16:21.870 that's what I wanted to do. I just wanted to perform and there was 256 00:16:21.990 --> 00:16:26.350 nothing else and I knew that was very scary because, as a contractor, 257 00:16:26.509 --> 00:16:29.590 I'm not receiving a w two in the mail at the end of the year 258 00:16:29.629 --> 00:16:33.700 from a job that I'm working at. That that just a defile a tax 259 00:16:33.740 --> 00:16:37.500 return. You know, that means I am literally going from Gig to Gig 260 00:16:37.580 --> 00:16:41.620 to Gig and that is my income. And I made kind of a schedule 261 00:16:41.659 --> 00:16:44.820 for myself. I said, okay, I know how much I generally make 262 00:16:45.100 --> 00:16:48.409 her Gig, I know how rough how much roughly I make in tips per 263 00:16:48.409 --> 00:16:52.169 night, and I can ill shoot low that way out. Hopefully I'll come 264 00:16:52.210 --> 00:16:55.850 out even higher than when I was thinking. And I just scheduled out my 265 00:16:55.970 --> 00:16:56.929 life and I was like, okay, you have this much money a week 266 00:16:56.929 --> 00:17:02.080 for entertainment, you have this much money a week to spend on groceries, 267 00:17:02.120 --> 00:17:06.400 you have this much money to spend on miscellaneous and then everything else is rent 268 00:17:06.519 --> 00:17:08.119 and you'll make and I was going to meet rent and I had the extra 269 00:17:08.160 --> 00:17:11.039 money left over and I knew that as long as I had the essentials paid 270 00:17:11.079 --> 00:17:15.279 for and I was being responsible and I had a plan and schedule, then 271 00:17:15.319 --> 00:17:17.309 I could probably do it. But I know how long is going to last. 272 00:17:17.630 --> 00:17:19.029 So that's the main reason why I did for drag ris, because I 273 00:17:19.029 --> 00:17:22.150 was like, this is going to be my career and I know that's probably 274 00:17:22.150 --> 00:17:25.549 the only thing that's going to give me the most momentum in the largest platform, 275 00:17:26.150 --> 00:17:29.349 but that's how I initially started. It was terrifying, but what it 276 00:17:29.390 --> 00:17:32.619 sounds like you do is that you actually sat down and made a plan and 277 00:17:32.700 --> 00:17:36.740 you believed in that plan. And I think that no matter what anyone wants 278 00:17:36.779 --> 00:17:40.140 to do, there's always going to be that fear of getting started, and 279 00:17:40.380 --> 00:17:42.500 the fact that you were, if I recall cruch of, you were able 280 00:17:42.619 --> 00:17:47.450 to pretty quickly, like get the bookings and get the success, you know, 281 00:17:47.569 --> 00:17:49.809 before drag Ray, said that you could make it, and I think, 282 00:17:49.970 --> 00:17:53.009 even though you say it's terrifying, I think that it's awesome that you 283 00:17:53.130 --> 00:17:57.049 still dove in head first and look, it turned out even more than your 284 00:17:57.049 --> 00:18:00.279 wildest dreams. I've yeah, well, thanks. It was really scary to 285 00:18:00.319 --> 00:18:03.480 begin with and I think I was really lucky because I had just went Miss 286 00:18:03.480 --> 00:18:07.359 Ga Indiana, so a lot of the bars around Indianda of her wanting to 287 00:18:07.400 --> 00:18:12.069 book me. The main ingredient to me starting my career is being Crown Miss 288 00:18:12.109 --> 00:18:15.430 Gaydiana. Like I'm really grateful for that. I'll always, always go on 289 00:18:15.470 --> 00:18:19.190 record saying that when you look back on your whole life at all the lessons 290 00:18:19.230 --> 00:18:22.549 you've learned, what would you say the secret is to living a happy and 291 00:18:22.630 --> 00:18:30.299 fulfilled life? That is a great question. I'd say, looking back after 292 00:18:30.779 --> 00:18:37.619 everything that I've either experienced, done, tried or been through, the secret 293 00:18:37.779 --> 00:18:42.970 for me believe in yourself and have confidence, make strong choices, stand by 294 00:18:44.049 --> 00:18:47.769 this choices, deliver through the consequences, good or bad, and deliver from 295 00:18:47.809 --> 00:18:52.490 them and continue to always stay true to yourself. That itself should create a 296 00:18:52.609 --> 00:18:57.119 fulfilling and happy and healthy life, because inevitably you're living for you and I 297 00:18:57.200 --> 00:19:00.519 feel like that is the healthiest course of action. Thank you. Thank you 298 00:19:00.640 --> 00:19:04.440 so much, Blair, for coming on snack size. It was amazing to 299 00:19:04.559 --> 00:19:08.440 catch up with you. So, if we want us a sickening wig, 300 00:19:08.640 --> 00:19:11.109 how do we get it? Oh girl, I'm all always make it out 301 00:19:11.150 --> 00:19:15.190 in those sickning weeks. For anyone, you can head over to my second 302 00:19:15.230 --> 00:19:18.950 instagram. My first instagram page is at Blair St Clair on Instagram and twitter, 303 00:19:18.109 --> 00:19:21.910 but my second instagram page, where I do all custom hair orders, 304 00:19:22.190 --> 00:19:25.180 is at hair by Blair official. So feel free to check that out. 305 00:19:25.299 --> 00:19:29.980 And I'm really excited to announce that I have my second album. So I'm 306 00:19:29.980 --> 00:19:33.900 really, really excited about that and that premiere is coming up soon as well, 307 00:19:33.980 --> 00:19:36.859 so day tune and all social media platforms, so that where you can 308 00:19:36.940 --> 00:19:40.890 be the first one to hear or see new things. Well, I am 309 00:19:41.049 --> 00:19:45.289 going to be glued. I cannot wait. I Love, love hearing your 310 00:19:45.289 --> 00:19:48.809 music. Do you know they actually played in the clubs here? I've heard. 311 00:19:48.930 --> 00:19:52.009 Yeah, whenever I get like a text message or a DM from someone 312 00:19:52.049 --> 00:19:55.119 saying look your songs playing, it is makes me so excited. Well, 313 00:19:55.200 --> 00:19:57.960 thank you again so much for joining us here at Sax Siye and snacks. 314 00:19:59.079 --> 00:20:02.880 I will talk to you all soon. Hope everybody is staying safe and healthy 315 00:20:03.000 --> 00:20:07.000 and follow blare on social media and check out her new album very soon. 316 00:20:07.670 --> 00:20:12.950 By snacks. This episode of snack size is sponsored by twin cities gay scene, 317 00:20:14.269 --> 00:20:18.990 the online magazine for glbt events, happenings and culture in the twin cities 318 00:20:19.029 --> 00:20:23.339 area. Head on over to twin cities gay singecom to check out the BI 319 00:20:23.420 --> 00:20:27.740 weekly magazine and be sure to sign up for the weekly scene shot email blast 320 00:20:27.940 --> 00:20:33.420 for chances to win fabulous prizes. Once again, that's twin cities gay scenecom. 321 00:20:33.740 --> 00:20:36.289 Be Fabulous and be seen