Sunny's East West Journey of Discovery

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Well, like everybody else, we all have stories right, like how we navigate life, and for me it's a story from the East to the West, from science to more of the spiritual, and also from working become a self-employed.

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Welcome to Stories of Change and Creativity.

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I'm Judy Oskam and I love interviewing people who inspire, educate and motivate.

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On this episode, you'll hear from Peiming Sun, but everybody knows her as Sunny.

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Sunny trained as a molecular biologist and then life changed.

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She now coaches others to increase happiness and reduce stress.

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She works in Mandarin and in English and she continues to blend Eastern and Western tools and strategy to help people like me find ease and flow.

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I hope you enjoy our conversation.

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So it's a lot of navigations and I believe that helped me to understand who I am, because if you stay in the same place and eat the same food, speak the same language and never travel, that give a little harder for us to understand.

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You know our essence and stuff because Think about the fish.

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The fish never leave the water.

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They don't even know they are drinking the water.

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So when the fish change the environment, they say the taste is different and they start to have more awareness about themselves.

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I think that's what I experienced in my life.

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I just have a lot of changes and shifts and then I finally become more comfortable about who I am, so I don't care that much about opinion.

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Yeah, I respect other people's opinions, of course, but then I don't take it to my heart anymore.

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It's like that's just opinion, right, just have some fun with it.

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Well, you know it' I think it's interesting that you have a background in science.

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Talk about how you, how you went from.

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You know a master's in science and biology.

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Was it biology, or tell me?

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Molecular biology.

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Yeah, yeah, molecular biology.

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And how did you from very science-based focus into the spiritual.

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What drove you to go there?

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It had to be something, I think everybody, sooner or later, will have different voice in their head, and I just happened to about my mid-30s.

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So what happened is other than I'm working in pharmaceutical I really devoted to my work but then I also have a young family and I just start to have needs, like I'm a mother and my marriage back then is not that balanced.

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So I feel like I'm burning out all the time and try to take care of everything Other than two kids.

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I feel I have three kids.

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So that is really tough for me to really navigate it and also have a special need kids turn out to be.

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So then I said, well, this is too much to juggle, so I decided to just quit my work.

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Then also, my marriage fell apart and the kids have a lot of needs and a lot of surgeries going on.

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I have to run it around.

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A lot of challenges, I would say, but then so then I start to find out what can I do to help myself.

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You know it's like I don't want to be burned out all the time, I don't want to be happy, I don't want to be grumpy because I am raising two kids.

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You know my mother instinct coming and say I need to make sure I'm okay.

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Right.

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So then I go back to my heritage.

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There's a lot of Right.

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Then I get out a little bit and I feel, wow, actually it's so many things within me I don't even know I have it.

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It's kind of embodiment.

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And then COVID hits.

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Then, after I quit, I have a lot of navigation.

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I can skip that and go down to the COVID.

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So at the COVID 2020, I closed my restaurant, I closed my food truck.

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That's the two crazy thing I did.

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So then I moved to online.

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I want to see what?

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Because I still stay home.

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I'm a caregiver for 18 years, so everything I do need to be around my family.

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I cannot go out.

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I couldn't do a normal work.

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So I'm thinking, well, you, you know all this internet, because 2020 everybody go internet right like kind of shift the ship.

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Everybody kind of move right on whatever to um, internet, even shopping or meeting people or anything, right, um.

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So that's my uh journey.

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Start, do it.

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And I become a tiny habit coach.

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Because that is really the turning point.

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I say, wow, that can really help me get out from that limiting belief and all this unhappiness.

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So I implement all this tiny habit recipes.

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Then the door is wide open.

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So right now I'm a holistic lifestyle mentor.

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Implement other people's behavior into their life with tiny habit methods.

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Oh, I love that.

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I love that and as a fellow tiny habits coach, I can totally relate to that.

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Why do you think in the West, why do you think we have forgotten or we don't value as much some of those ancient practices?

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Well, I don't think we are aware enough.

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Everything relates to our consciousness level.

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When we are quiet, when we are relaxed, when we are really quiet and don't say anything, that is the time we start to have more connection with our consciousness.

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But, based on my observation, people here are so busy they're just like run, run, run, that little engine never stop right.

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And um, even they do meditation.

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This time, okay, 10 minutes done, I'm gone.

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I'm like the meditation is for you to have the pause, for you to have the time to just enjoy your presence.

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But you become, make it like an exercise, like you are check, dip, dip, dip.

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So you totally lost that essence about just still and enjoy that nothingness.

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But I think it's become.

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I mean, more and more people start to practice.

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They understand they don't need to be rushed to the meditation, they don't need to rush to the yoga right.

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They rushed to the meditation, they didn't need to rush to the yoga Right.

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So I do see a lot of people start to relax more.

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Yeah, and that is a good thing.

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So I don't think it's any because the West or East are different, it's just lifestyle.

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Mm-hmm, right, where you're.

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Tuning to when you're young, right, tune into when you're young, right, that's how I discovered a lot of programming and attitude really become shaping our life.

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When a young age, then if you we are not aware we are not really have this desire to get out and update our lifestyle, that can be until we are burnt out yeah, until something happens.

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Yes, you know break your.

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You know you have to stop right, but sometimes that is not the good ending you don't need to go there right well, when, when, when, when people come and they ask for your guidance and your support.

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What are they asking you for help with?

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I think most of it is the self-worth, particularly for women.

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They don't understand sometimes the self-worth is not something we can get from outside, right Self.

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So anything self-love, self-assurance, self-empowerment really need to come in from here.

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But I think we are trained, like me included, to look for solutions and we lost in the journey of looking other than just give us some space and love yourself more and go out to the nature, walk around, pat the trees, relate to nature.

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You can just give us out of that mind, because when we think about if we don't do this, we don't have a time to do it.

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Um, we need to find a more effective way, and that is take us even further away from the self-worth, because then you're looking, you say I don't have that thing.

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Then I cannot be happy.

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I need that, otherwise I don't feel successful.

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We always do that too much.

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We need to have some kind of in and out, vertical and the corral everywhere, the quantum.

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When you really become harmony, that is the time you start to understand you don't need anything else, it's just enough.

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Yeah, yeah, but I think that's tough for a lot of high achievers because we're programmed to want to prove ourselves right.

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And look external and not internal.

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Yeah, you need to look everywhere, so not too much that you need to have this too.

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Like, of course we need some tools, we need some help.

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You know guidance, but if it depends on nothing, then they didn't fill out your own self-worth, then you still don't feel that's enough.

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You become like, yeah, I got this, but I'm not celebrating.

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You know, that's how I lock tiny habits.

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Just a little thing.

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You celebrate, yeah, right, then you can build up because, hey, I recognize myself.

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Yeah, then if something coming is great, but I don't need that to be filled, I'm enough.

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So the celebration from the tiny habits, training and methods is such a turning point for many, many women if they don't have enough self-worth.

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Can you give us an example of a tiny habit recipe that you might give someone about self-worth?

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Yeah, yeah.

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Well, that is the first time I used the tiny habit, of course, the famous Maui habit.

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You know, when you wake up, you say this is a good day.

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But I put another one in front of that called habit of a miracle, another one in front of that called Habit of a Miracle.

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So what happened is, even before you put your feet on the ground, you open your eyes.

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When you open your eyes, I would just say when I open my eyes, I will say to myself I'm a miracle.

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Then smile, yeah.

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Then I pause a little bit, then I use them all I have.

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Hey, today's going gonna be a good day, yeah.

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So that miracle, you know, in the biological sense, because everything for me is biology, chemistry, physics, right.

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So, in in think about how wonderful you are, you have all the miraculous things within you for you to digest the food, for you to, you know, have a breathe.

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You know that, like, if you don't have those single cells trillium, trillium that work together like a community, you cannot really do what you're doing today.

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Just recognize that, right, that's the little thing.

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Little, yeah, I love that.

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yeah, yeah, yeah you know, I you know, and and the tiny habits recipe.

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Can you break down what a tiny habits recipe is with the abc for us?

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yes, yes, um, for people don't know it and check out the book by dr b fuck tiny habits and the recipe.

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Actually, abc stands for A is anchor moments, that you have a routine, so you just take advantage, you already have some behavior in a certain time of your day and choose the anchor moments.

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And B is the behavior because tiny, right, so we need to find something less than two minutes, or even, for me, using a lot of just one sentence super sure, yeah, yeah so.

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Or a start point.

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It's like starting, like if you want to go out for walking, put a shoes on that kind of small step, then c is the one I just mentioned celebration.

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It really pay attention to the little things we do, like we are all miracle.

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You don't have to pay attention to how you digest your food, how you drink your water, how you put air into your nose, right, but those things really keep us moving.

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So, as tiny as possible.

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Then you recognize that behavior and you celebrate.

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And that's scientifically is put that happy hormone into your body, the bloodstream, so your chemistry start change.

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Then you start to have this alertness, you have the motivations to want to do more.

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So that is the magic of the ABC.

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Exactly exactly, and I've seen it work in my life and I've seen it work in other people's lives, and it just really is so simple when we can make the behavior so tiny that it doesn't require much motivation at all, and it really doesn't need much else than that prompt or that anchor.

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Yeah, yeah, but it's still a neat practice.

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That's how we have the recipes, we can change it.

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And if that income moment is not really work, then change different time and behavior.

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If that behavior is really not able to do it, you don't have ability or environment to do it.

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Change it and play with it.

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And celebration is the one I never give up, like that part needs to be there all the time.

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Sure for sure, and that's the one that was.

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I don't know about you, that was the hardest one for me is celebrating, because it just felt kind of silly.

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But then I realized, if I could do the celebration part, it really did rewire my brain and it felt really good.

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So I allowed myself to feel good about whatever that yes behavior was.

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So yeah.

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I think that is very difficult for me when I'm in the low consciousness, low vibration, because everything is kind of grinding.

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But then I think maybe the timing is right because I don't need to live that life anymore.

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So I choose to be lighting up and just enjoy the moments.

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And my style is still very just gentle, just smile.

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I don't do jump or the superhero, Because I was just like how can I do that?

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But sometimes I play with it when there's nobody around, so why not?

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That's great.

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Yes.

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Well, sunny, talk a little bit about how, when someone comes to you and they need some guidance on what are the opportunities out there to learn, I mean, where does someone start, not just the self-worth part, but where does someone start learning about vibration, learning about consciousness?

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How do you even start that, that whole process?

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well, first, I have a framework called slow it's acronym, actually, so self-awareness, and for the s is we are all aware in the way.

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But can we ditch the awareness and start to shift that a little bit?

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You know, know, the pauses can really do that Like.

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This is the tiny habits.

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I use it as a strategy pauses.

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So when you pause then you shift the language in your mind.

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You can play, you know, key points in the day, the morning, the mid days and before you go to bed.

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So practice that self-talk, different self-talk, different self-talk.

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Pause and recognize yourself and celebrate.

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So that can definitely increase your self-awareness.

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And also, if they're really looking for some tools, I have toolbox can be positive psychology, I can have esoterics, I'm doing the ancient wisdom style.

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So there's all different toolboxes.

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That depends on what they really want to open up.

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And the second one is L, it's the lifestyle.

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So I will like to know how they wake up and how they eat and all those different lifestyle.

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If there's something I can tune up a little bit, I'll give them a suggestion and they can go ahead to practice and come back to okay, yeah, it worked for me or it's not.

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Then we can work together again.

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And the always openness is the posture.

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To be honest, it's physical.

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So if we are like lotus, you you know, just do that all the time.

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When you feel constructed, just expand it out.

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So that is the openness, but also that remind us to be open to different opinions, sure.

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So don't take us seriously that kind of thing.

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And the last one's, the w, is wisdom.

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We have so many wisdom within our body, right and right now.

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We have a technology actually can help us.

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They are using the energy, they're using the lights, all the physical work.

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They don't need to give you the medicine or surgery, but those lights from the natural resources can boost your energy.

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So I do have products I suggest for people to try it to see whether your energy flow becomes differently, and also your movements, but all the slow, of course.

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Slow pass, don't push too much and have your segment of time to dedicate to slow.

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It's like schedule a calendar with a slow or joy, whatever you call it.

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At that moment you have to just break through, just be you.

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Then that slow really help a lot of people that want to get things done and don't have the right energy, because once you flow, you just follow your own way.

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Then you will have more energy to do anything you like at the right time.

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Because sometimes I think we are misaligned when we have the most energy, we do something not necessary using that energy, but when we don't have enough energy, we force ourselves to do something that needs a lot of energy.

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So it's really the alignments and understanding your own flow that can just fix everything.

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Oh, that's good, that's good.

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Well, and can you give me an example of someone who has come to you and what you've seen the result from, so that listeners can understand what they could, you know, learn from this?

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Yeah, I'm one of the Thrive Global coach and among those coachees we call them to come to me.

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They are all curious about oh really, we have different energy flow.

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I say, yes, everybody's different, right?

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So we do have unique way to see ourselves, and that is one angle.

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The other, I'm doing some esoteric reading.

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So people just need to give them their birth certificate, time, location.

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I actually can disclose their energy profile because they have all the system now, there they are.

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I don't want to say scientific proven, but it's evidence-based.

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So when you know that, then you can play with it.

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You don't need to totally trust it because you know self-doubt actually can use for a good use.

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But don't doubt too much.

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You need to be, I'm not sure, but you can play with it.

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You're curious about it, right?

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So you play with whatever.

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Then you can see the differences.

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For myself, it's definitely, you know.

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I start to shift it because I know my energy need to be more allowing.

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I'm not good for forcing.

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If I'm forcing too much, everything's gone.

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But if I just relax and sit there, people come in and you know, I don't even know how did you find me?

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I don't know.

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I just want to talk to you.

00:22:12.726 --> 00:22:14.682
You know, those people start to fly and flying, is that?

00:22:14.682 --> 00:22:28.161
Wow, if I really know that, I can just kind of, you know, stay there and know what I want, and since people will come because they are ready, I'm ready yeah in a way, I think it's just the energy.

00:22:28.342 --> 00:22:48.689
Once we know how to flow with your own energy, then things become much easier and you have more energy because you don't waste your energy to force, to go to the wrong place or do too much and you don't really have things to maintain yourself.

00:22:48.689 --> 00:22:52.390
That's how I see a lot of female entrepreneurs.

00:22:52.390 --> 00:22:56.371
They are working in this environment.

00:22:56.371 --> 00:23:00.191
They think it's the only way to stand out strong.

00:23:00.191 --> 00:23:05.845
You know, I want to be the superwoman In the body builds.

00:23:05.845 --> 00:23:08.112
We are really different than male.

00:23:08.112 --> 00:23:17.755
We need to use our advantage as a female body and don't fall into the system the male created.

00:23:17.755 --> 00:23:20.762
Now, not necessarily good for everybody, right.

00:23:20.762 --> 00:23:25.051
But if they're successful, that's great, we celebrate for them.

00:23:25.051 --> 00:23:35.574
But we need to find our own way, knowing our energy flow and knowing our genetic profile, because that system I'm using it, is related to our genetics.

00:23:36.074 --> 00:24:05.895
So get back to my molecular biologist, because now we know, right, the genome, human genome is just part of the framework right but lifestyle and the epigenetic, the epigenome we call the epigenetic inferences like your lifestyle, your thought, your diet, environments, your sleep, all that can impact your genetic right.

00:24:05.895 --> 00:24:19.184
So that happy is really the lifestyle it's really just love ourself and relax and slow down, yeah, then your gene would turn around the right way then you don't need even worry about like.

00:24:19.265 --> 00:24:30.425
You know how to activate our gene, but you just happen it sounds like a way of just finding your place in the world.

00:24:30.425 --> 00:24:32.769
Is that what it is finding your place?

00:24:33.750 --> 00:24:40.188
yeah as well, even finding is part, but it's like accepting this the other way finding and accepting.

00:24:40.248 --> 00:24:40.849
I love that.

00:24:40.849 --> 00:24:47.468
Yeah, I love that yeah well, I always try and ask my guests about their personal strengths.

00:24:47.468 --> 00:24:54.673
I'm a gallup strengths coach and I think there's a lot of science in the gallup CliftonStrengths assessment and everything.

00:24:54.673 --> 00:25:01.631
And what do you see as your own strengths, your own personal strengths, that have helped you kind of navigate this?

00:25:02.500 --> 00:25:09.592
Yeah, it's fun Like three years ago, before COVID I take, and now it's totally different.

00:25:09.592 --> 00:25:13.317
Like my highest in then is spirituality.

00:25:13.719 --> 00:25:13.880
Yeah.

00:25:14.323 --> 00:25:16.480
But now my highest is the curiosity.

00:25:16.480 --> 00:25:22.829
But I can see myself actually maybe just move around.

00:25:22.829 --> 00:25:27.961
It's the same, like maybe scale got a little bit shift right, sure.

00:25:27.961 --> 00:25:34.682
So my um, I think the highest I have is curiosity, love to learn, humor.

00:25:34.682 --> 00:25:40.526
Then spirituality is still there, but it's number five now.

00:25:40.526 --> 00:25:47.407
Then I have some things like openness too.

00:25:47.407 --> 00:25:51.369
I am just accepting more other than total force.

00:25:51.369 --> 00:25:54.590
So that's how I put it all together.

00:25:54.590 --> 00:26:01.973
I'm curious because I'm the mentor, so I always ask questions about my people hey, how you do that right?

00:26:02.555 --> 00:26:03.974
Then I will put some humor.

00:26:04.914 --> 00:26:12.337
use my own story, say hey you know I learned this way, Then I also like to learn.

00:26:12.337 --> 00:26:21.849
So I'm constantly learning new tools and to see how people apply and how they speak, how they communicate.

00:26:21.849 --> 00:26:28.406
That is my fascinating to like, observe human behavior, human communication.

00:26:28.406 --> 00:26:32.252
So that is, I'm practicing it.

00:26:32.252 --> 00:26:41.269
But I'm not sure after four years my strengths will shift, because what I see is the personality can shape and we can change the personality.

00:26:41.269 --> 00:26:42.794
Someone says it's hard.

00:26:42.794 --> 00:26:43.862
I think no.

00:26:43.862 --> 00:26:49.913
If once you know yourself, your energy, you can flow it, just choose it.

00:26:49.913 --> 00:26:52.969
But the essence never change.

00:26:52.969 --> 00:26:54.962
Thus I find out.

00:26:54.962 --> 00:27:00.142
My essence is always there, but the personality I can choose.

00:27:00.142 --> 00:27:05.316
When you are aware you got more of a consciousness.

00:27:05.316 --> 00:27:10.286
Oh, I'd like that personality before, but how about this right?

00:27:10.286 --> 00:27:17.202
So it's not denying ourselves, it's just kind of involved it's just very flow right for me.

00:27:17.284 --> 00:27:20.651
Yeah, that's kind of fun oh, that's great.

00:27:20.730 --> 00:27:45.817
Well, give us some last tips on um for people listening, about how they can maybe find and understand their own energy, and give us a tip or two if you would yeah, the things I practice myself is called the heart brain coherence is basically, if you feel your mind is non-stopping, just crazy.

00:27:46.478 --> 00:27:48.622
You want to slow down, right, you want to slow.

00:27:48.622 --> 00:27:52.228
So that is the time you do the heart-brain coherence.

00:27:52.228 --> 00:27:53.931
There's three simple steps.

00:27:53.931 --> 00:27:56.515
You can find it at the heartmassorg.

00:27:56.515 --> 00:28:03.727
They're backed by all the scientific data, so it's not like a make it up.

00:28:03.727 --> 00:28:12.229
So the first step is you just pay attention to your heart area, so we call it heart location or heart focus.

00:28:12.229 --> 00:28:13.873
You can touch it.

00:28:13.873 --> 00:28:15.865
Our hand is all the energy.

00:28:15.865 --> 00:28:16.949
You just touch your hand.

00:28:16.949 --> 00:28:19.705
Um, using your hand, touch your heart.

00:28:19.705 --> 00:28:21.269
So that is the first step.

00:28:21.269 --> 00:28:22.371
It's a heart focus.

00:28:23.011 --> 00:28:25.642
And second step is to call heart breathing.

00:28:25.642 --> 00:28:28.944
Basically you, the heartbeat.

00:28:28.944 --> 00:28:33.069
The rhythm actually is not that super fast.

00:28:33.069 --> 00:28:41.586
So if you do follow that rhythm, you know in and out, in and out, you slow down your breathe and go deeper too.

00:28:41.586 --> 00:28:43.612
Then that's called hard breathing.

00:28:43.612 --> 00:29:01.025
And the third is when you get into the rhythm you start to think about or just imagine a beautiful forest or a good food or, um, puppies, you know, make you smile, anything, make you smile.

00:29:01.025 --> 00:29:05.096
You skip back to that imagination zone.

00:29:05.096 --> 00:29:06.519
So it's sweet together.

00:29:06.519 --> 00:29:10.510
You know heart focus, heart breathing and heart feeling.

00:29:10.510 --> 00:29:13.460
Then you can calm down your crazy mind.

00:29:13.460 --> 00:29:18.130
A monkey mind will be just kind of flow with your heart, because heart has more of the power.

00:29:18.130 --> 00:29:21.762
They have a more of the energy field in our mind.

00:29:21.762 --> 00:29:25.515
I think it's like 500 times more higher or something.

00:29:25.515 --> 00:29:26.557
It's very strong.

00:29:26.557 --> 00:29:28.962
But sometimes we just don't pay attention.

00:29:28.962 --> 00:29:31.346
We're just using our head and drive true, yes, so true.

00:29:31.346 --> 00:29:41.471
So if you combine you actually can erase the self-judgments, because the heart they don't have the judgments.

00:29:43.923 --> 00:29:45.670
It's our mind, it's our mind.

00:29:45.700 --> 00:30:07.146
So once you practice that, anytime you feel anxious or something, you just let the heart take over, then that worked Very, very, very simple, less than two minutes every time you do that I love that, but you have to consciously make an effort to do it that's how the tiny habit become powerful.

00:30:07.146 --> 00:30:09.351
That's right into the behavior.

00:30:09.351 --> 00:30:09.751
You know.

00:30:09.751 --> 00:30:14.488
Just find an anchor moment after each zoom meeting you.

00:30:14.488 --> 00:30:16.031
You got two minutes, do that.

00:30:16.031 --> 00:30:17.823
I love that have to.

00:30:17.823 --> 00:30:19.593
You know, before sleep, do that.

00:30:20.134 --> 00:30:20.980
Yeah, that's great.

00:30:21.019 --> 00:30:22.304
Make a recipe, yeah.

00:30:22.625 --> 00:30:23.567
Yeah, I love that.

00:30:23.567 --> 00:30:24.601
I love it, Sunny.

00:30:24.601 --> 00:30:28.711
Thank you so much for sharing your wisdom and expertise with us.

00:30:28.711 --> 00:30:29.744
I really appreciate it.

00:30:30.599 --> 00:30:33.470
Oh, thank you for having me as a guest.

00:30:34.279 --> 00:30:39.392
Fantastic, and we'll put your contact information in the show notes and you're doing podcasting.

00:30:39.392 --> 00:30:44.327
You're doing all kinds of fun things that people can keep learning and growing and connect with you as well.

00:30:45.049 --> 00:30:46.152
Thank you so much, Judy.

00:30:47.501 --> 00:30:54.970
And thank you for listening to Stories of Change and Creativity and remember if you've got a story to share or know someone who does.

00:30:54.970 --> 00:30:56.403
Reach out to me at judyoskam.com

00:30:56.403 --> 00:30:57.105
com.