The Power of Disagreement

What's up, everyone. This is Alex Lieberman, co-founder and Executive Chairman of Morning Brew. Welcome back to Founder’s Journal, my personal audio diary, where I give you, the business builder, the tools you need to think better in order to build better, whether that's building a business, a team, or a new product. Today, I talk about The power of disagreement. Let's hop into it. 

Netflix does it right

I am a huge Netflix fan, huge, but it may not be for the reason that you think. Obviously from building Morning Brew, I am a content and media junkie, and I think that the war chest of IP that Netflix has built puts it into a content hall of fame with companies like Disney.

But actually what I love about Netflix has nothing to do with its content or media. It has to do with its culture. Thanks to Patty McCord and the now famous 125-slide Netflix culture deck, the streaming giant has become famous for its very specific view on how culture does and does not work at Netflix. The deck talks about everything from how values aren't just words on a wall, but what are the behaviors that lead to an employee's promotion or separation? It also talks about the importance of talent density and how good employees get generous severance packages and great employees continue to escalate at the company.

But for the purpose of this episode, one of the things that I admire most about Netflix is how it has built a culture that welcomes open disagreement. Here's specifically what it says on the company's blog, quote, If you disagree on a material issue, it is your responsibility to explain why you disagree, ideally in both discussion and in writing. The back and forth of discussion can clarify the different views and concise writing of the core issues helps people reflect on what is the wise course, as well as making it easy to share your views widely. The informed captain on that decision has the responsibility to welcome, understand, and consider your opinions, but may not agree. Once the captain makes a decision, we expect everyone to help make it as successful as possible. Later, if significant new information becomes available, it is fine to ask the captain to revisit the topic. Silent disagreement is unacceptable and unproductive. End quote. At Netflix. it's simple. First, commit to helping the company make smart decisions by communicating honestly. And second, once a decision has been made, commit to pushing forward that decision. Now, when you heard what I just read, what did you think to yourself? For me when I read it, I thought this obviously makes sense.

How disagreement normally works

Obviously we want to have direct discussions that lead to finding the truth and making the best decisions as a company. Obviously we want a place where you feel comfortable sharing your point of view, even if your view is not consensus. But ironically, this way of doing things, the Netflix way, is not consensus at all. Here's how things are done at the average company: Senior leadership has a meeting to discuss the one-year roadmap or the one-year game plan for the company. A memo was sent before by the CEO outlining what the roadmap was. One senior leader reads through the memo prior to the meeting and has some serious concerns.

They worry that the product direction is going to dilute the business and spread the company's resources too thin. And the senior leader sees two options, either narrow the scope of the product direction or build in a more ambitious hiring roadmap to properly staff for expansion. The day of the senior leadership meeting is here. The senior leader is feeling good about sharing their honest thoughts, but then something happens. They freeze up. They worry that the CEO will be angry. If a senior leader disagrees with them in a public forum. They worry that they'll quickly become the odd person out in leadership where the group will now become divided. They worry that their inability to get on-board with a plan will jeopardize their trajectory within the company. And so, instead of being honest in their disagreement, they nod their head and they agree with the plan. This is the story for the vast majority of companies. And to be honest, it's the story for the vast majority of conversations generally, on social media, with friends, in extracurriculars. And that scares the shit out of me because I have always believed that open and honest disagreement is one of the most important vehicles for society and companies and people to progress. It's what separates us from every other species. Humans aren't stronger than gorillas or lions, but we have something they don't: reasoning and collaboration. That's what's put us atop the animal kingdom. And I was reminded of this fact as I read an amazing essay about The power of disagreement over the weekend. Literally since the ancient Greeks, argumentation and debate has been a prized activity. Where do you think the Socratic method, which is used in many law schools, comes from? Socrates believed that the best way to find truth was through exchanges of arguments. And he would literally host arguments in the town square of Athens to practice argumentation. He'd invite someone to say what they believed and he would follow up by asking, why do you believe this? and how can you be so sure? But imagine doing this sort of intellectual colonoscopy in most settings today. You'd be judged for being rude and argumentative. But progress in your life and in business is all about wrestling with difficult ideas and problems that don't have one definitive answer. A more contemporary example than Socrates are the Wright brothers. The Wright brothers were able to invent the airplane without being engineers or scientists and not going to college. And what many attribute this feat to was their commitment to vigorously debating the theory of flight among each other, for years in the upstairs of their bicycle shop that they owned. But open disagreement, wasn't a born behavior.

The Wright brothers were taught in the same way Netflix employees were taught it by Patty McCord and Reed Hastings, and in the same way that Socrates taught it to the Athenians. Milton Wright, the Wright father, taught his sons how to argue productively. After dinner, he would introduce a topic and tell the boys to debate it as intensely as possible without being disrespectful. Then after a little while, he’d tell the brothers to change sides of the argument and start arguing for the opposing view. Milton Wright understood that every opinion that we have has some truth and some error in it. And through honest argument collaboratively, we can find an even truer truth together.

So let's bring it back to Netflix and how we operate today. I bring up this topic of open disagreement not only because I think it is an accelerant for people and companies to grow, but also because I think we as a society are at risk of reading ourselves of this proven age-old practice. We as people fear argumentation more than ever before. We fear confrontation. We fear cancellation. We fear being and failing. And I think the polarization of social media and society and politics has made this aversion to argumentation even greater.

More than ever, we are conditioned to connect people's views and ideas to their identities. If someone is a Republican, we are conditioned to think something about them as a person. And if we should even surround ourselves with them. If someone is a Democrat, we are also conditioned to think something about them as a person, and if we should even surround ourselves with them. But disagreement and direct argumentation isn't who you are. It's what you believe about one or a set of ideas. So by now, I hope you appreciate why disagreement, debate, and argumentation are an absolute treasure for personal growth, for professional growth, and for business growth. And also why it's never been less welcomed in society.

So what I'd like to do is leave you with a recipe, a recipe for having open disagreement at work and in life in a way that promotes growth and removes blind spots. But this recipe also comes with a caveat. It is only as effective as is the culture of the context in which you're having the debate. Here's what I mean by that: To feel comfortable debating and disagreeing with others, you need to feel the safety to do so from your boss, your coworkers, your family, et cetera. So assuming you do have that and you do have the buy-in to disagree, here's the formula for debating. 

The 4-step formula for debating

First, you must have a shared goal, a certain revenue goal, a certain mission for the business, a certain vision for the product. Without a shared North Star, you will never be able to have a mutual respect for each other's opinions because you'll be aiming at different targets.

Second, only attack ideas, not people. I believe this is why so many of us are afraid of disagreement. We see how unhealthy and combative social media can be when hot-button topics are discussed. But I don't think it's actually because of the passion of the debate. It's more about the way in which people are debating with one another. Like I said, people connect ideas to identity. And so when they disagree with someone's ideas, they choose to also disagree with who that person is fundamentally. No debate will ever be successful if we don't separate idea and identity. It's okay to be passionate, emotional, and competitive in your disagreement. But the second that you attack more than just an idea, that's when a debate turns into personal attacks. 

Third, invite confrontation, don't give in. The worst thing you can do for yourself in collaborative discussions is give in and nod with the consensus. You don't have to disagree for the sake of disagreeing, but if you find yourself conceding on your views because of your fear of being the odd person out or being confrontational, you've now shorted yourself and the entire company of the opportunity to grow. You can only focus on what you can control and what you can control is coming to the table with thoughtful ideas and sharing those ideas. You cannot control how someone reacts to what you say and their reaction shouldn't stop you from sharing your beliefs. Think about how much you'd regret, not sharing your disagreement: The company decides to make a really pivotal decision and then the company fails six months into the future when it could have been avoided if you simply shared your perspective.

The fourth and final ingredient to the recipe: Always listen. The best way to show respect for someone else and the importance you place on collaborative disagreement is listening. A debate can get heated. You can get emotional. But if you don't listen to what someone is saying, you're defeating the exact purpose of the debate, which is learning where there are errors in your own way of thinking and uncovering blind spots in the entire group's way of thinking.

 With that, with these four ingredients to the recipe, I give you permission, permission to disagree, permission to debate ,permission to not back down when you believe in something that can benefit everyone involved. Without debate and disagreement, companies, people, and society just move slower. It is time for you to do your part, to help us speed up and grow. As always, thank you so much for listening to Founder’s Journal. If you enjoyed the episode, please pound the subscribe button on Apple, Spotify, or wherever you listen to your podcasts. And if you already subscribe, make sure to check out Founder’s Journal content on Morning Brew's YouTube channel. We have taken this podcast to video. Go to YouTube search Morning Brew and click on Morning Brew channel there. You'll see an entire playlist of Founder’s Journal videos, from how to deal with imposter syndrome, to why Ethereum matters to you and I. Thanks again for listening and I'll catch you next episode.