Transcript
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Scroll through social media and you'll find someone debating something stupid.
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Just fact, you never have to stretch far for a controversy over something seemingly completely innocuous.
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All you have to do is go to social media.
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There was a post on Instagram that had this picture of a shopping cart in the middle of a parking lot.
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It said, I don't know one successful person who leaves their cart in the middle of a parking lot.
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The debate in the comment section was hilarious.
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Every argument from disabilities, parents with small kids, to my personal favorite, protecting union jobs, depending on the grocery store chain.
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The fight over not being lazy was both amazing and entirely disappointing.
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All at the same time.
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What more can you ask for from the internet and social media?
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Right?
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Well, why am I sharing this?
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Little things matter.
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So let's get into it.
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Here's the million dollar question.
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How do men like us reach our full potential growing to the men we dream of being while taking care of our responsibilities, working, and living?
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Being good husbands, fathers, and still take care of ourselves.
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Well, that's the big question in this podcast.
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We'll help you answer those questions and more.
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My name is Brent and welcome to the fallible man podcast.
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So here's a direct quote from this argument.
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So let me get this straight.
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I put my three kids through college.
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And my worth as a father is being determined by whether I put a grocery cart back in his holder.
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Now, let me make my opinion on this abundantly clear for everybody.
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Yes.
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Yes.
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Your worth as a father is determined by every day moment by moment example you set for your kids, every day, every choice you teach your children how to act.
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So congratulations to this random individual.
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You raised three children, paid for their education.
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And they were all taught that somehow they're above common courtesy and good manners.
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Yes.
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I am absolutely judging you now.
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You don't have to agree with me in this case, but how about listening to my argument for it, and then you see what you think.
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By the way, my name is Brent and welcome to the fallible man podcast.
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You're home for all things, man.
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Big shout out to fallible nation.
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That's our long time listeners and a warm welcome to our first time guest.
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Hey, thanks for checking us out.
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There's a lot competing for your attention these days.
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And I really do appreciate from the bottom of my heart, you giving us a chance.
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I promise I'll make it worth your while.
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So let me set a few examples for supporting my case here in the Navy seals.
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No, I'm not a Navy seal.
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Just done the research at the beginning of training.
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They're taught to make their bed.
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First thing they make is their bed and they make it with literally ruler precision.
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I know this cause we were taught the same thing in the air force.
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And they literally measured corners and crap.
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What precisely does that have to do with the lethal precision, deadly reflexes, steely mind, and a skillset that carries these men in and out of places in the world that most of us would die, or how about the fact that Jordan Peterson, psychologist, former professor and author advocates the same thing, make your bed and he takes a step further to take care of your personal space, which is also implied in the military.
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It's a simple, but seriously underrated routine that often gets neglected.
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In his bestselling book, 12 Rules for Life, An Antidote to Chaos, Peterson explains that personal space prevents psychological entrapment and is a fundamental and is fundamental to our ability to function in the world.
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Now, science has proved people who make their beds have increased productivity, reduced stress levels, and it makes your brain feel more organized.
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What does it have to do with shopping carts and being lazy?
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Well, there's an old adage.
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If you're too big to do the small things, you're too small to do the big things.
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Facts are that success isn't built in one momentous moment.
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It's not like there's this pinnacle moment and we are successful.
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No, that's not how it works.
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Success is built by thousands of little moments stacked up on top of each other.
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Thousands of little choices every moment of every day.
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In fact, various internet sources basically agree that the estimate, except the last minute.
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Of choices an adult makes in a single day is around 35 remotely conscious decisions.
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Sorry, 35, 000.
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I knew that sound too small.
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35, 000 remotely conscious decisions made every day.
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Now that number may sound a little absurd to you, I get it.
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But in fact, we make an average of 226.
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7 decisions each day on just food alone, according to researchers at Cornell University.
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It would make you think little choices are probably less important if we're making 35, 000 decisions a day, or choices.
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Would be the right term there, but it's actually the opposite.
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There's also another old adage as well.
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Under pressure, you will revert back to the lowest level of your training.
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Jordan Peterson also has some version of this.
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That's similar expresses the same thing.
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It's just a little more wordy and a little more elegant than I normally am.
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This is why little choices are important, simple, decent, or better yet.
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Good choices help you prepare for bigger choices.
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You're faced with later in life.
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So when you get faced with big choices, you have practice making good choices because you're not going to get faced with earth shattering consequential, all the sky parts kind of choices every day, guys.
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But if you aren't practiced at making good choices, then those decisions become much more paradigm shifting for you in the long run, when you are faced with those monstrous decisions.
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Choosing to put the cart back.
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Doesn't magically make you a good person.
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I'm not a good person because I put my card away.
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I'm not claiming that it doesn't make you better than everyone else.
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There's no snootiness to it.
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Like I'm not high and mighty and better because I put my card away.
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It's a small step, very small step.
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That is a tiny piece of good personal health choices, public courtesy, practicing good manners, finishing what you started, completing what you start.
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I think that's the same thing, but I said it two different ways.
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Setting a good example, being conscious of other people's property.
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Hey, runaway shopping carts, guys.
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It's real.
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If you haven't had to repair a ding in your car, cause some idiot let the basket go and putting away things that you get out.
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This is a big one.
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I have two kids.
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Trust me.
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I make this argument all the time.
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If you get it from somewhere, you put it back where it goes after you're done with it.
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Right.
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Putting my cart back is part of all those things.
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Putting your cart away.
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If you use a cart at the store is a part of all that.
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And Hey, you know what?
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I've been a blue collar guy.
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Most of my life.
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I understand that there are.
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Union stores.
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I love that argument because I was a union electrician and I understand unions.
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And you know what?
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There are stores that have unions.
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I'm not saying take it all the way back to the store.
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Just take it out of the parking spaces and put it into the cart return.
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Right.
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And then those people who are paid union employees will come and get it from there.
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You're not taking that away from them, but you are protecting your property, other people's property.
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You're finishing what you started.
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You're setting a good example.
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You're being courteous.
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Am I stretching this too far?
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Am I, am I reading too far into this?
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I don't actually think so.
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How about his dad?
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Isn't our job as fathers live as an example on every thing we do so that our children know how to act.
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What if we put value into every little choice you make consider if we practice small, seemingly unimportant choices.
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And treated them as important.
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What if we make our bed with intention and care?
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I'm not saying you have to get to like military grade corners.
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That's a nightmare.
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But what have you actually paid due respect to making your bed and keeping your area clean as Dr.
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Peterson recommends?
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What happens if you brush your teeth?
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With actual care and consideration.
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I know some of you do, but a lot of it's just kind of do it out of habit and get, you know, it's like 45 seconds.
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I know is way shorter than the dentist will tell you to do.
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Well, you actually did it like it mattered.
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And you actually cared and paid attention to what you were doing.
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What if you paid a little more care to how well you take care of your clothes?
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Make sure they land where they go.
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Every time your wife might like you better.
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They ended up in the laundry basket instead of throwing it all over the place.
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How we dress, what clothes we wear, how you take care of them.
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Is it going to change your life?
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Well, actually.
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According to science and not that shit the government likes to throw out for its benefit when it wants something, but real science, science tells us that most people live 95 to 97 percent on, of their life on autopilot.
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They don't consciously think about the many things they're doing each day.
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Most of those 35, 000 decisions we talked about earlier, they're made on autopilot.
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You don't even realize you're making them.
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Apparently 95 percent of the time we'll go with a low number.
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Let's roll it.
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We'll, we'll take it even lower.
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How's that?
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We'll go 90 percent of the time.
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You're not actually functioning in those decisions actively.
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What changes?
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I know that's a surprising number, but what changes now?
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Some of you don't want to believe me on this.
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So let's play a game for a minute.
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Reflect on this for just a minute.
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You got up this morning.
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Did you follow the same routine you've done for months and even years?
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Not varying it at all.
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Now, for some of us, that might be like, I have a varying routine, but it's basically the same thing with the same stuff, but it might change in order, depending on if one of my children are in the bathroom or my wife is or something.
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Cause we only have two bathrooms, right?
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Sometimes you got to hold it before you get there.
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So you got to do something else.
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Did you even think about what you did first thing, or did you just do the same thing automatically?
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We were talking from the minute you swing your legs out of your bed.
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What did you see on the way to work if you've been at your job for more than six months?
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Did you actually notice all the things on the way to your job?
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I can tell you factually, I had a point in my life where I cannot remember segments of the trip to work because I got up so early in the morning and had to drive a ways to get there.
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There is a section of the trip.
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I don't actually ever consciously remember driving.
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I did it every day, but I don't actually remember driving that trip.
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Nine times out of 10, my morning routine is comprised of the exact same things.
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Usually in the identical order.
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Sometimes they get switched up just a little bit.
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Like I said, I live with four women, so, you know, sometimes you got to swap things up a little bit.
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So what do you get back?
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What do you gain by getting intentional about all the little choices in your life?
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Well, how about 95 percent of your life back?
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You see, because if you're living 95 percent of your life on autopilot, you're not actually making choices.
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You're just experiencing existence.
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So every little choice can have a huge benefit or consequence.
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And if you put a little thought and some intentionality behind it, it can really, really be impactful.
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Practice every day, taking care of small things.
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Put intention, effort, and pride behind every choice, every action, every decision.
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Treat it with the value and respect that it deserves.
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Like you have an audience watching you and the world is depending on you actually doing it really well the first time, every time.
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Taking the small steps, making the small choices that build up to a significant impact over time, that is the key to really thriving.
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Your life, your epic, your legacy will not be made in one giant moment or might be.
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But if you don't take care of all the little choices, if you don't become intentional and purposeful about all the small things, when you're faced with that moment, you will choke.
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Making good decisions, making good choices, making the right choice.
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That's a skill.
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So whether it's returning a shopping cart, making your bed or simply treating others with respect, these actions define us.
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And shape the world around us.
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If you're ready to kick it into gear and start living your life the way you want to, but you're not quite sure how to get there, check out our six week men's personal development program, Kaizen.
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Our holistic six week program combines the power of group coaching with a customized individual transformation plan, delivering a comprehensive and impactful experience that is your opportunity to build the foundation that you need to pursue your best life.
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Guys, thanks for tuning in.
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Remember to subscribe, share your thoughts in the comment.
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Was I totally off on this guy just blowing smoke, or maybe is there something to this argument, join the conversation, my name is Brent.
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You're listening to the fallible man podcast.
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And as always be better tomorrow, because what you do today, and we'll see on the next one, this has been the fellow man podcast.
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You're home for everything man, husband and father.
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Be sure to subscribe so you don't miss a show.
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Head over to www.
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TheFallibleMan.
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