The Cost of Avoidance

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In the gym, the exercise you really
don't want to do is often the exercise

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that not only you should be doing,
but you really need to be doing.

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Let me give you an example as a personal
trainer, everyone, and I mean, everyone

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should be doing squats in some form, in
my opinion, period dot like everyone,

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everyone should be doing squats and most
people avoid them like they owe the money.

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Everyone would benefit from doing
some form of weighted squat.

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There's no downside as long as
you choose a form based on your

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physical capability and health.

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Right?

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Obviously, if you have a damaged spine,
you don't want to do one that's loaded

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on your spine, but that doesn't keep
you from doing other kinds of squats.

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There's no downside.

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It actually makes you a
hundred percent more healthier.

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There are a hundred or more
benefits to doing squats.

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It is ridiculous.

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It is an incredible exercise.

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So everyone should be doing it.

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So the question arises, where else in your
life are you costing yourself something

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of tremendous value because you don't
like something or you don't feel like

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it, or you just don't want to do it.

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Let's get into it.

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Here's the million dollar question.

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How do men like us reach our full
potential growing to the men we dream

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of being while taking care of our
responsibilities, working, being good

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husbands, fathers, and still take care of
ourselves well, that's the big question.

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In this podcast, we'll help you
answer those questions and more.

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My name is Brent and welcome
to the Fallible Man Podcast.

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Now I can hear people pushing
back already, and I'm not going

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to argue squats in this episode.

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That's not what it's about.

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It was an example.

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So let me share with you two
more recent examples in my life.

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Recently on one of my videos, when I
talked about controlling things that

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control you, someone commented very meanly
because you know, the comment section is

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generally pretty mean, but that's okay.

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Someone commented, obviously, well,
you can't keep away from food.

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The truth is I've definitely got
some extra weight around my stomach.

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It's where I carry all my weight.

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It's the last place weight drops
off from for me and my focus.

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Both personally and as a trainer
has always been on strength.

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I can lift substantial weights
compared to the average person.

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But I don't really care
about my midsection.

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Now, should I probably,
should I do some more cardio?

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Absolutely.

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Cause I don't do enough.

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Does it cost me?

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Yes.

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It costs me because while I am strength
focused and if you look at like strongman

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athletes, none of them are particularly
skinny, but I am strength focused.

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Now that's fine.

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That's for me.

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But from an outside perspective
that does make people question

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me as a personal trainer.

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I can tell you how to lose weight.

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I can drop weight fairly rapidly.

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I've done it many times over my life,
but it is likely cost me clients because

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my goals don't align with theirs.

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And so from the outside, it looks
like I don't know what I'm doing.

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Something I should probably address
and take care of, by the way.

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My name is Brent and welcome to
the fallible man podcast, your

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home for all things, man, big
shout out to fallible nation.

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That's our private community and
there's information where you can

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find out more about that down in the
description or the show notes, depending

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on what platform you're with us on.

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And for our first time listeners,
Hey, thanks for checking us out.

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I know there's a lot fighting
for your attention these days.

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So it means a lot that
you're giving us a chance.

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Be sure to reach out to me at the fallible
man on most social media platforms.

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Instagram is my main focus.

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And let me know what you
thought of the episode.

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And if you really enjoyed it, share
it with a friend, subscribe, and

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leave us a comment on Apple podcast.

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That would be awesome.

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It helps us reach more people.

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Now back to the topic.

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You can't hand the comment.

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Honestly, I could care less.

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Uh, I've, I've been on YouTube in
various forms for so many years.

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I don't care.

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Mean comments are just around,
but let me give you another,

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even more tangible example.

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If you've been around the show
for a while, then, you know.

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I'm not a wild fan of social media.

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If you're new to the show,
let me put it simply.

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I despise social media and
having to be on it as a platform.

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It is my least favorite thing
about the work that I do.

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The majority of listeners on the show
have not come here from social media.

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I know my platform and I know what I
do for a living and podcast listeners.

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It's not a big pull for podcast listeners.

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In the podcast world,
that's actually very norm.

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Social media is like number eight or
nine when it comes to the list of top

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10 ways that people find your podcasts.

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So I've actually usually use that fact
to justify me doing a half assed job

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on my social media and neglecting it
whenever I just don't want to do it.

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Now, in hindsight, that neglect of my
social media has likely caused me business

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in the form of clients and sponsors.

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Most people in companies have no idea
how to gauge the success of a podcast.

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My analytics aren't publicly available
and because of corporate podcasts, like

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Joe Rogan, who have large advertising
budgets and things like that, and

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already an insanely popular host who
was famous before he ever started.

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A lot of companies have a real
skewed perception of what a

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successful podcast looks like.

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So since they don't understand the medium,
they reference what they can easily access

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because they understand what it looks
like to be successful on social media,

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which equates to a really large following.

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That's how you know, someone's
successful on social media.

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They have a whole lot of followers.

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Now my show is in the top 1
percent of all podcasts globally.

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To me, that's great news.

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But I see those analytics, like
I said, not everybody does.

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We have less than 2000
followers on Instagram.

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My own prejudice against social media has
actually cost me in the form of sponsors,

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because that's the numbers they go look
at because that's what they understand.

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They're like, Oh, well, no one.

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And that's right.

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Now, if you're listening to this,
Hey, come follow me on Instagram.

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That is where I am active,
uh, and touch base.

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I love it because I can actually,
that's the reason I'm on social

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media is I can actually connect
with my listeners that way.

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And it's the only thing about
podcasting I don't like.

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If there's not a good platform for
you guys to connect with me directly.

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So I do that on Instagram,
but it's hurt me.

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Those are two real life examples.

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Joseph Campbell, some
of you know who he is.

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I mean, you know, said the
cave you fear to enter holds

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the treasures that you seek.

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Now, maybe that sounds really deep to you.

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And maybe you don't know who
Joseph Campbell is or care.

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But our big question today is,
what are you costing yourself?

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Like really, how much
are you costing yourself?

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I'm pretty sure I'm not the only one who
has made the mistakes I'm talking about.

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So what cave are you avoiding to
enter, as Campbell put it, right?

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We have to be really clear.

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There are absolutely things that
you're not doing, which are perfectly

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reasonable for you not to do.

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And I'm not suggesting
you do those things.

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If you have a food allergy
and have to avoid certain

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foods, then please avoid them.

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It's really simple, right?

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We're, we're thinkers here.

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So I'm counting on you understanding
what I'm talking about.

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What we're specifically talking about
is some of the things that you know,

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you should be doing, whether that's
squats in the gym or my case, social

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media, which I've actually doubled
down recently and try to get more

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conscientious about my social media.

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I know how to do it.

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I just don't like to, but somewhere
deep in your heart, there's something

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that, you know, you should be doing or
that you should at least give a try.

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And for whatever reason,
you're actively avoiding it.

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Maybe it's a difficult task.

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Maybe it's something really
unpleasant that's out there.

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Maybe it's uncomfortable or for
whatever reason you hate it,

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or think it's really stupid.

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Like my case with social
media, it doesn't matter.

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You have a thing and you know what it is.

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Is for whatever reason,
so let's evaluate cost.

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What is the air quotes, possible
costs for you not doing this thing,

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whatever it is you're avoiding.

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In the case of squats, I can tell
you, you cannot, will not ever

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reach your true strength, physique,
or health potential without them.

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Squats are honestly the king of exercises.

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We already, and I'm talking
about weighted squats.

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We already went over the potential
costs of my disdain for social media.

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And we went over the cost of me.

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As a trainer, focusing on strength and
not worrying about dialing in my weight.

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I don't worry about how I look.

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I worry about how I lift and
that matters to me, but it does

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impact how people receive me.

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So what is your possible
cost of this thing?

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Maybe your personal
development has stalled.

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Maybe your relationship has become
stale because you don't want to put in

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the effort because you're tired or you
feel like you've hit just a brick wall.

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Maybe your career growth has stopped.

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Has your health started decreasing
instead of getting better?

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What is it you should be doing
even if you don't really want to?

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And what is it actually costing you?

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Now guys, generally I try and
give you really clear answers and

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directions in this show that you
can take and apply to your life.

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Not because they're perfect, not
because you absolutely have to,

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but because they register with you
and you went, Hey, you know what?

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I can do that.

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And that's what I like to
give you guys in this show.

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That's what I want to share.

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I'm on a personal journey and I
want to invite you to go with me.

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And so I try and bring you stuff,
whether it's from guests or from my

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solo shows, where you can go, Hey.

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You know what that clicks?

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And he gave me an action plan where I
can start from right here in this moment.

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I like to give you those things
because I think that gives you a lot

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more, but sometimes with my background
and being a trainer, both in the

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gym and in the work environments.

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The most valuable thing I can give
you is a question because it's

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going to be far more valuable.

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If you ask yourself the question and
come to your own answers on this, I

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don't know what it is you're avoiding.

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I don't know what it is, but you
know, I promise that as we've

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been having this conversation,
you have that thing in your head.

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You know, exactly what I'm talking about.

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Worst case scenario, you try it
and it doesn't make a difference,

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but I can almost guarantee it
will because we actually avoid

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things that we don't want to do.

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But the reason they sit on our
brain is because we know that

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it's going to make a difference.

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So that's my big question
for you guys today.

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How much are you costing
yourself by avoiding something

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that you should be doing?

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Guys, as we land this plane, I
want to remind you it is February.

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We are running our first promotion.

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We've run a long time and that
is the Fallible Man Podcast.

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Listener Appreciation sweatshirt giveaway.

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The rules are simple.

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Follow me on Instagram.

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Leave me a review on the
podcast on a podcast platform.

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Join my one of my two mailing lists.

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I have exclusive content every two weeks.

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So my bigger mailing list, and then
I have my weekly podcast email that

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00:12:04,904 --> 00:12:07,875
just lets you know, Hey, these are the
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That way you can pick and choose
which shows you want to watch.

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Let me know, send me proof.

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Cause it takes a couple of days for like
a podcast review to process and be posted

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to send me a proof to info at the fallible
man with the subject line sweatshirt

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to be entered in for the drawing.

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I had to stop doing these because
I tend to give away way more than

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I say I'm going to give away.

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You can't promise that's what's
going to happen this time, but.

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I won't pretend it might not.

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So at the very least, one lucky
listener is going to win one

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of our awesome sweatshirts.

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Who knows more than that may come.

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I like to give away things.

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Guys, think about this.

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It really is something I've
had to stop and process myself.

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I have actually taken a whole new
social media approach on Instagram

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that I've been working on implementing.

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Based on a social media expert
that I got her book and I loved,

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I heard her in a conference.

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And so I'm trying to do a better
job there because I know that it's

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hurting my reach with the fallible man.

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How many, many we can serve,
and that is our goal here.

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So ask yourself what that cost is and
if you're willing to continue to pay it.

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Thanks for hanging out with me today.

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Thanks for listening to me ramble.

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And it's always be better tomorrow
because what you do today and

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we'll see you on the next one.

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This has been the Fellow Man podcast.

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Your home, grab everything
man, husband, and father.

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Be sure to subscribe so
you don't miss a show.

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Head over to www.thefollowableman.com
for more content.

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And get your own foul woman gear.