Unleashing Your Potential: A Deep Dive into Mindset, Self-Sabotage, and Limiting Beliefs with Luke Rossmo

[00:00:00] What is the most, if, if someone hears nothing else today, what is the most important thing you want them to hear as we wrap up the show? Do you remember what I said earlier about the, if, uh, if I could talk to one person, um, so the reason that I do these podcasts, a big reason is, uh, because I used to feel like I was, there was something wrong with me.

And there's, there's this misnomer in the world of like self development, um, that there's a self to develop. And that creates a problem because what the what the inference there is, is that you need to be developed that you're not okay and you're not enough as you are. And so I like to make the distinction that you're good, and, and you're enough, and there's [00:01:00] nothing, there's nothing missing, and you're not missing anything.

And when you. Feel safe enough to explore and begin to accept and then begin to express who you are at your core life gets a lot easier and Then to make the distinction that there are skills that can be developed And you know if you want to do different things in the world it would be worthwhile to develop those but You at your core, you're good.

There's, there's nothing missing.

Here's the million dollar question. How do men like us reach our full potential, growing to the men we dream of being while taking care of our responsibilities, working, being good husbands, fathers, and still take care of ourselves? [00:02:00] Well, that's the podcast, we'll help you answer those questions and more.

My name is Brent and welcome to the Fallible Man Podcast.

Welcome to the Fallible Man podcast, your home for all things, man, husband, and father. Big shout out to Fallible Nation. You guys keep us doing shows like this and a warm welcome to our first time listeners. Thanks for giving us a try. I hope you enjoy the show. My name is Brent and today my guest is my set and performance coach.

Luke Rossimo. Luke, welcome to the Fallible Man podcast. Sup Brent. How you doing, man? I'm excited to be here. I'm, I'm looking forward to the conversation, man. But we like to start off really light. So how's your trivia skills? I'm terrible. Oh, good. That's okay. Hit me, man. I hit really random questions, so.

Okay. Today's random trivia question. What is the highest grossing holiday movie of all time? Is it A, A Christmas Carol, B, Home Alone, C, the Polar Express, D, the Grinch, or E, Elf. [00:03:00] Well, I said Elf. That was the first thing that came to my mind. So, I'm just gonna settle on that. Alright, now guys, you know the rules.

Don't cheat. We'll get back to the questions sooner or later. Uh, but make your guesses. If you're driving, please don't write them down. Don't, don't do that. But, wherever you are, make your guess and we'll get back towards the end of the show. Now, Luke, I start. Everybody with the same question because I can read accolades doesn't help anybody.

So in your own words today, who is Luke Rossimo? Oh, wow. Um, it's hard to know somebody out of context, but, uh, let me give it my best shot. Uh, I feel free, like free to be who I am, express myself. Um, in order to do that, I feel like I know myself, you know, um, which, which I certainly can't. Always say and um, man, I just,[00:04:00]

I, I just want to leave it at that because as soon as you start bringing in, you know, these identities and these titles it, it starts to put us in a, it starts to put us in a box and I think what I recognize most is I don't want to be put in a box. So, uh, I guess just for your listeners though and for you, um, you know, a father and a husband and, uh.

A musician and a coach, a business owner, I'm all of those things. But at the end of the day, I'm, I'm so much more than those things. Just me, man. You know what? There's absolutely no wrong answer. Uh, I, I usually tell people before we start rolling the first part of the show, there aren't any wrong answers.

So, you know, that, that's the thing is everybody has a different approach to framing themselves as not wrong. Right. Who am I to say that that's the wrong way to frame the Grosso Mo, [00:05:00] right? I always like people to introduce themselves because that's just you telling our audience, Hey, this is me writing this moment right now.

And we're cool with that. However, that goes for you. Right? Like I said, no wrong answers in the first part of the show. That's why I liked the first part of the show the most, honestly. What you're saying is there's wrong answers later. No, no. Trivia is probably already wrong. You know, in all fairness, I think I've had three people get.

So this, wow, if I'm getting most of the time I look online, but if I'm getting really mean, I pull out trivia pursuits. We did trivia night one time. It was brutal. Like I recognized how useless I am at tripping when we went to trivia night. I just, I think I'd sat in eight nachos. It was just not so night for me.

I grew up playing trivial pursuit a lot. We would make my dad go through three times. Like he had to fill up his pie. Three [00:06:00] times before he could actually, really, because he grew up a historian's kid. And so like he, and my dad just loved information. Like he could just sponged it up, but I thought I knew Harry Potter pretty well.

Cause I've loved the movies. I love the books. Right. My kids love it. So we all like to watch Harry Potter's together. We got the Harry Potter, your trivia pursuit. And then it was like, wow, I have to reread everything all over again. Don't even know what they're talking about. They find the most obscure things for trivia questions.

Here's an easier one. What's your go to comfort food or guilty pleasure snack? Ice cream. Ice cream? Any certain kinds? Um, there's this kind, so I live in Canada. So we have this place called Safeway. And they have this brand that's, uh, it's called Moose Tracks. It's a version of Moose Tracks, but it's chocolate Moose Tracks.

That's really good. That's really, really good. Yeah. I like, [00:07:00] I like moose tracks. I haven't had chocolate moose track. So, uh, if you want your mind blown, you're going to have the chocolate one. I wonder we have a Safeway in the next town over. I may see if they actually have that. We all knew what I'm doing after we finished recording now.

So yeah, ditto now morning person or night person morning now. Okay. You could have a conversation with anyone living or dead and it doesn't have to be famous, like anyone who would it be and why

I'm going to go weird here. Um, I would have a version with

myself from as like a kid and I just, I would've told. That boy, the things that he really needs to hear. Yeah, there's no wrong answer. That's that isn't, isn't that the ultimate form of like self service? Like I would go back and tell myself what I needed to [00:08:00] hear. You know, I saw someone post on, I think Facebook one time.

It's like, you know, if you could go back and tell your younger self one thing, what would you tell yourself? And it's like, one thing, that's a really steep question right there. Cause like, wait, I only get one out of all the collective knowledge that I've picked up. At my age, I'm 43, but I can only tell my five or six year old self one thing.

And I got to make them understand that, right? So, you know, they're, they're deep questions. I actually had to start clarifying cause everybody was like, Oh, and they're looking for famous historical figures. Like, no, man, just, just anybody. So now I have two different questions. I Twitch switch up every now and then.

Uh, nobody else comes to mind like Yoda, maybe, you know, I feel like Yoda's got 800 years of wisdom that I get a lot of people saying Jesus because I think it's like, it's, it's the right church answer. And it's like, [00:09:00] you know, there's nothing wrong with that. But who else would you pick? Right. Cause that's, that's the, you know, yes, button auto answer for a lot of people.

They kind of feel like they have to pick that. But it's funny how people, some people were like, I asked one woman and she's like, my grandfather, like, just didn't have to think about it right on. Okay. You know, People are funny. I just, I love people. They entertain me so much because everybody is so different.

That's the thing is we're all, we have this, you know, shared experience, you know, living on earth, but, um, everybody's living in their own world through their own. Lenses and perspectives. And that's why you can ask the same question and get a million different answers. And it's like, wow, you, you see the world differently than me.

That's really interesting. But that just makes it more cool that you see the world differently than that. Yeah, absolutely. If you could learn a master, any skill instantly, what would it be? And why? Yeah. What is, [00:10:00] these are, these are great questions.

Okay, I would love to be able to dance really, really, really well, like crazy, crazy moves dancing. That's, I'm a musician, so I express myself through music, but I feel like dancing is a different, a different form of self expression. And there's a lot of, when you watch a great dancer, they're so free within themselves.

And, and the self expression that comes through that, I just think I'd really enjoy that. I'm a, I'm a, I'm a, maybe a below average dancer. Um, you know, when I'm, when I'm home alone. So just to be an amazing dancer, I don't know why I think that'd be awesome. I I'm a swayer. I have no dance skills. I'm I'm the way in place.

We rock back to high school dance, man. Yeah. Yeah. You know, I got one trick that that's music speeds up above a slow [00:11:00] dance. I'm like, let's go hang out over there. I hear that. That was, that was me in high school too. I had one of my brother's girlfriends teach me how to box step once. Cool. So I can fake it a little bit on a more formal dance.

Cause it's like, okay, I, it's a square. I can move in a square. That works. It's kind of like swinging with one more step. Got it. Yeah. I love it. What are you most proud of? Who I am. What purchase of a hundred dollars or less have you made in the last year that's had the most profound impact on your life?

Oh, a hundred dollars or less. Everybody ember. That always cracks me up. Yeah. What, uh, man, something simple.

Man, uh, I'm really struggling with this one. Um, I don't get myself many things. Let's go back to it. Let's see [00:12:00] what floats up to the top. Yeah, yeah. At any point, just like, you know, while we're talking. Oh, I got it. I got it. You got it? This is a water bottle. Yeah? Yeah, I have this with me almost all the time and it's, it's, it's been very good.

Is it a good water bottle? That's the question. Uh, I'm embarrassed to, to, to share this story. Um, I have another, my son brought me this before we started. So this is, this is kind of a, a, you know, it's a free water bottle from like Popeyes or something. Yeah. Yeah, like, so that's normally what I would get and I just wouldn't, I didn't care about it.

So my wife had this beautiful purple water bottle that was very much like this. And this was a couple years ago and I was like. This seems really fancy. Like, what did this thing cost? And she told me, and I almost lost my mind, like, you pay what for a water bottle? Um, cause I grew up with money stuff. Uh, so, and then I lost it in the park one day.

And I felt horrible. [00:13:00] Long story short, I ended up getting this water bottle from Lululemon. So, it's like a 50 water bottle. And I carry it everywhere. Um, I love it. I respect it. And I use it. I use it. So, it's... It's water, man. Like it's one of those baseline things like oxygen. Yeah. So it's a need it. So yeah, it's actually had a profound, it's given me a profound, um, do you drink more water now that you carry it?

Exactly. That's the thing. So it's, it's had a profound, tangible impact on how I show up day to day, simple, but profound. You know, it doesn't have to be something huge. It's amazing what, right. I had one guy fell in love with a pair of shorts. You want it? You ready? Chug 70 shorts, one pair, 70 bucks. I get it now.

I, he went and bought six more pairs. So he had one for every day of [00:14:00] the week. Yeah. So, okay. So this isn't under a hundred dollars. We just bought a new car. Um, and it's this little sports car, man. It's a, it's a, it's a Mazda MX five. Um, and that I love to be in that car and drive, I, it's just so fun. Um, so man, things that can bring me joy, um, that it doesn't matter the number, whether it's a dollar or, or more money, I'm just all about the joy.

These days, like I said, little things change lives radically. It's, it's the little things that really tend to throw you. But I mean, I understand we're a water bottle family. I, I showed you I have my coffee cup on my desk. We stick water stickers on ours. That's cool. So all of us, like my kids, my wife, we all walk around carrying water bottles all the time.

And we put stickers all over them, but we always have our water with us. Right? It's good. [00:15:00] I, I. Used to really say have a hard time staying hydrated and as I got more into trying to fix my own nutrition It's like man, I just need to carry it with me all the time. It's the only way I'm gonna drink it Yeah, and we do live in the high desert.

So it's it's really dry here Yeah, so I was like we live in the desert yeah, yeah, yeah, it's it's warm and dry here so What is one random fact just totally random fact people don't know about you when I was a kid I was really good at chess Awesome. Awesome. That's a good skill. Chess is a good game. It's a beautiful game.

It's a beautiful game. Do you play? Huh? Do you play? I do. I don't play very often. Usually if I get to play, it's uh, like a long holiday stay at my brother's house or something visiting. And him and I will, we'll sit down and break out the chess board. Or his oldest daughter, he taught her to play. And she'll sit down and play with me.

Uh, I'm, I'm, my daughters are just [00:16:00] getting old enough. I'm going to start teaching them chess. They're 8 and 11. Yeah. And I've tried to keep them off strategy so much as just play, have fun right now. Now they're getting older. We'll start into strategy games. Yeah. Yeah. There's a, my son walks around, I don't know where he picked this up.

He's just three and a half and he'll, he'll be drinking his water bottle and then he'll put it down and say, I'm the winner. Why do you want to win? Like where'd you get that from? Because it didn't come from this household, but there is something that happens when we start to make everything about winning and losing.

And yeah, so important, man, for kids to just be kids and play. I'm I'm super, my wife and I both hyper competitive people, but we, we also walk that line. I was like, okay, this is maybe a competition. This is not right. When we start my daughter's. We'll definitely pick up on that. The [00:17:00] fact that we're competitive and when they start trying to turn things that aren't competitive and it's like, no, no, no, no, no, no.

This is, this is not a competition. You want to compete in something that's fine. We'll break out a board game. That's we'll go play something in basketball or something. Uh, they both like to play basketball, but we, we have relegated competition to. When we're doing something that's supposed to be more competitive as opposed to everyday life.

Yeah. What are we competing for? That's come back to my kiddies. I watched my dinner and he puts his fork down. He's like, I'm the winner. I'm like, no, we don't, we don't win at eating, man. We enjoy our food. That's it. My daughter's race from the car to the front door. So you can get there first. I think that's cool.

It's like, well, one of them starts on the other side of the car from the front door. These are, these are fair odds guys. That is, it is the older one. So what's one thing, some bit, something. What's, we'll see if I can talk, what's something [00:18:00] that everyone should know about you before we start digging into today's subject matter.

Um,

I've changed it a lot. Fair enough. Yeah. Yeah. So the person that you, the person I'm showing up with you isn't how I would have shown up with you, you know, a year ago, certainly three years ago, certainly not five years ago or 10 years ago. Yeah, fair enough. Like I said, no bad answers in this. Yeah, guys, we've been hanging out, getting to know Luke just a little bit.

So you can connect with him, see who he is, what he's about today, right now in this life. And the next part of the show, we're going to dive into an eye open, wrong things. I opened the wrong thing. I'm doing well today. In the next part of the show, we're going to roll into modern men, self avatage and the dreaded F word.

We'll be right back after this word from our sponsor. [00:19:00] Now, before we go any further, I wanted to share with you guys. I don't always tell you how much I. Love doing my podcasts. Like I passionately love what I'm doing. And one of the things that makes my life better as a podcaster is to work with a company like grow your show, grow your show is a one stop podcast.

Do it all. Now I use grow your show for my marketing, but grow your show is literally a one stop shop. You can record your episode and just drop it off with them. And they take it from there. It's amazing. If you. Are interested in picking up podcasting as a hobby, or maybe you're looking to expand your business and use podcasting in that aspect.

Talk to my friends over at Grow Your Show. Adam will take care of you. I guarantee it. I trust him. He's my friend. He's my business colleague, and I wouldn't trust anybody else with my show. All right, guys, welcome back. In the first part of the show, we just spent some time getting to know who Luke Rossimo is.

And this part of the show, we're going to dive into the modern man, self sabotage and the dreaded F word. Now, Luke, we, we covered some of the [00:20:00] fun stuff and we talked about your life now and who you are today, but you have a story and I'd love for you to take a little time and share that story with us.

Yeah, cool. Um, do you want me to start anywhere in particular or just kind of take it and run with it? Where do you feel is relevant for you? Um,

so, I lived a, uh, I lived a rather small life, so, small, and the reason for that was

Well, just to be honest, I was miserable. Um, I was, you know, anxious basically 24 7. I didn't have any self worth. Um, you know, I didn't, I didn't speak up for myself because I really thought like, well, who cares? Who's going to [00:21:00] care what you have to say? And, um, so,

you know, through my twenties, um, I was high. Most of the, I was high all the time. If I wasn't sleeping, I was, I was, I was stoned. And, um, that transition to, um, exercise and then a horrible relationship with, with food. Uh, so I would, you know, I've been John food and especially ice cream. That was my go to, uh, that was my go to food.

And, um, you know, I just had this, this chronic internal narrative of like. Man, what's wrong with you? What, what is wrong with me? And I would see people in the world that seem to be like actually enjoying life and living life and, you know, they would be making more money than I could fathom at the time.

And they seem to have connection with people and they seem to have these loving, [00:22:00] effortless, what seemed like effortless relationships. And of course we never truly know. Um, and especially on social media now, but, um. And, uh, you know, they were, they seemed to be healthy, vibrant people. And then I would look at those people that I thought had it all.

And I'd be, I'd be like this point of comparison of like, well, what, what do these people have that I don't have? And so. I always just felt like I'm missing something, like I, I have a defect, I have a defect, and as a result, um, you know, I worked this, this terrible job, um, where I was basically emotionally abused, it was an abusive situation, I always joke now, I was in an abusive relationship with my employers.

But I didn't have any sense of self and any sense of worth. Um, and so I wasn't in a position to say like, Hey, this isn't okay. Um, you know, I was underpaid. I [00:23:00] was, and I also had this sense of like, I didn't deserve more. Like the amount of money that I had was, that was all that I was worth. And, and really it wasn't even okay to want things.

Um, so I left this just a small, sad, sad life and the worst of all of it. And, and like.

To have your life so small, it's very, very difficult because I truly believe that we're here to experience life and experience ourselves in the world and grow. Um, and, and the thing that I wanted more than anything in the world, anything in the world was, was not more money. It wasn't more and better quality relationships.

It wasn't to finally get the stupid six pack or whatever. All of these things that I thought were going to like, Finally make me happy that I felt like I couldn't even attain. Um, I want to, you see a guitar behind me. I wanted to [00:24:00] play, I wanted to play music on stage. Uh, I love to sing. I love to write. And it turns out I love to perform, but, uh, until I was 28, man, I'd never done any of it.

And, um, and so most of my life, I have this experience of living just this sort of contracted, uh, painful. Um painful existence, uh, and there's been a journey you see those those movies where You know there's there's a character going through a struggle and then It like cuts away and it's like two years later and they're like walking down the street and they're all happy and You know, they're chumming it with people and there's like indications that they're doing better, but they're they're happier Um, nobody makes a movie about like those two years or those six months or those eight years Cause it's been eight years.

Um, and [00:25:00] slowly I've come out of my shell and I'm experiencing more of myself and the world, and one of the catalysts to stepping forward and start to rediscover myself was to step on stage for the first time and just play a couple of songs and open mic and, um, facing the fear because everything was scary at that time, everything.

Um, but to step into that and come up the other side and like be alive, like, Oh, I didn't die. What else can I do? And. That's where, that's where it started. Yeah. We like to gloss over, we live in an age of Instagram, right? Where everybody sees the highlight reels and nobody wants the, they want the training montage that's like, Oh yeah, we overcome those training montages are 30 seconds long, but it's, it's five years of that person building enough muscle to do whatever they're about to do or, right.[00:26:00]

It's never that. And yeah, we don't, we don't like the, no, no, that's uncomfortable. That's. That's, uh, not pretty. It's messy. That's exactly right. And, um, and yeah, it is. Sorry, guys. But I know that, uh, I worked in the, uh, the nutrition realm, the weight loss realm for a long time. And everybody in that, in that arena, myself included, for all of my life, is looking for the quick fix, the magic bullet.

There isn't one there. And there isn't one. Anywhere. And on one hand, that can be infuriating because we just want the thing now, whatever the thing is, but when we really release ourselves to the fact like, yo, this, whatever it is, whatever you want, and even if it's a, even [00:27:00] if you're on an inner journey of, you know, moving from where I was like this, this, this incredible contraction and misery to, I feel pretty good most days.

Like I feel I do. And I'm, I'm really grateful for that. Um, yeah. But that's been a process and it has been messy and there's been ups and downs and it's not this linear trajectory and To expect that it's going to be is gonna you're gonna be set up for disappointment like yo You're you're a human being having a human experience There's gonna be some ups and downs and if you can be okay with that and you can be okay With the idea that you know, whether it's an internal journey or external journey that's gonna take some time as well and And, and you can actually learn to enjoy that process because that's all life is, is a process.

We arrived maybe at these little destinations along the way, but the whole thing's a process. What if we could just enjoy the process? [00:28:00] What if, and I guess that's one of the big shifts is from shifting from this place of like looking for the next result, which I could never get anyway, talk about self sabotage.

Um, to work like releasing myself from like, Oh, if then, um, when, when I get this thing, then I can feel this way to, I'm going to feel this way, enjoy my life and I'll work towards the things that I'm interested in. I'll be okay if it happens and I'll be okay if it doesn't happen. Like, it's just a paradigm shift.

I'm riffing on what you said, man. I really took the, I took the reins. No, you're good brother. No, you're absolutely good. Actually, I was just thinking to myself, it's really funny. Because right. We live in this instantaneous, uh, we won't, you know, instant gratification now, right. But we love stories as, as a preacher, human beings love [00:29:00] stories.

We thrive on stories for as long as man's been around stories have been at the core of our culture and our existence. Right. And we go, we love going to the movies. Absolutely. To go to the love to go to the movies. We love to read a good book. The book's always a journey. The movie is always a journey. You have like a four or five minutes at the beginning of the movie that sets it up, why we're taking this journey.

And then the conclusion is five minutes, but then you have two hours of movie in between that is the journey. But we want to skip over that part in our own lives. That's what we're paying to watch on the movie screen. That's what we love is that story. Cause we can identify with it, but we want to skip that in our lives.

We just want to. We want to get to the end result. I tell people all the time, uh, as a trainer, it's like, look, you didn't get out of shape and overweight. [00:30:00] In five minutes, you're not going to resolve those issues that you have with that in five minutes. If it took you a year and a half of eating crap and doing nothing to get out of shape and put on some weight, you didn't want to carry, it's actually going to take you two and a half or three years to get down healthily.

And make it lasting because you got to build new habits and fix, there's a lot of journey to get it out of what you set up and, but everybody wants the five minute abs or, right. We, we all want to win the lotto and be instantly rich. I told my wife one day, I'm going to win the lottery. She's like, you got to play the lottery.

I was like, nah, I'm meant to win the lottery. I have as much of a chance of finding the winning ticket on the ground as I do buying one. That's interesting point. Yeah. I love your movie analogy. That was really good, man. It just occurred. It's like, wait, that's the whole movie. It's the whole movie that, but like [00:31:00] extrapolate that to a lifetime.

That's your life. That life is the journey. That's the point. That's the extended version. Yeah. If you're watching the movie, you don't, you don't wait till the last five minutes to be like, oh yeah, that wasn't a good movie. No, it's the whole thing where you're, you, you evaluate the movie by. By the story, by the journey, by the whole thing.

Yeah. You don't watch the last five minutes and you're like, Oh yeah, that was good. That was a good ending. Can you imagine like the Lord of the Rings? Right? You have the director's cut, which is like 12 and a half hours long. If we started with Frodo and the Shire went straight to him, throwing the ring in the lava at Mount Doom.

That's what happens. And just, sorry, we cut out the whole rest of it. Right? We cut out the other 11 and a half hours. No one will be talking about that story years later. We wouldn't, we wouldn't be remaking it. We wouldn't be telling the story still. Um, it's interesting because when you're, I won't play with this idea some more because I think it's, it's [00:32:00] actually profound.

Part of the thing is, uh, when we're watching a movie, it's not us. Like, there's distance from that story. So when we're in our own lives, we just want to get to the good part. Like, whatever that means. Because we're so, like, we're so close to it. If you can be a little bit more of an observer of your life and less entrenched within the day to day, uh, there is room for appreciating where you are.

And that, that, that, that can be a practice, it has to be a practice. Because we've been used to practicing that old paradigm of like the if, if this, then that. When this, then that. Um, so something that, Uh, my wife and I are really committed to, and it's not comfortable because it goes against, for me, it goes against a lifetime of conditioning.[00:33:00]

Um, and it's this I'm going to, I'm there's this idea in certainly in my family growing up, you have to be responsible. So that car, it would be like, that's not responsible. It's a two seater. We've got a kid. So now all of a sudden we can't even go places in that car, the car payments higher, so like in all these ways, I can rationalize that it's, it's not responsible.

But what if, what if, um, you know, it's one thing to be responsible to finances and all this, but, but what if I placed on the hierarchy of responsibility, being responsible to my joy and I prioritize things that brought me joy, what happens? And it's been this experiment and this question that I like to ask myself during the day, during the day.

So this is a daily practice is. How could this get better? [00:34:00] Like, how could this become even more enjoyable? How well do you sleep at night? Do you toss and turn and wake up more tired than when you went to bed? Sleep is commonly one of the critical elements people fall short on in their life. The quality of sleep you get directly affects your ability to control your weight, your ability to add muscle, your stress levels, and your everyday job and life performance.

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Now let's go on to the show. Um, cause most people, and this was mean, they'd be like, man, my day sucks. This sucks. Nothing's working out, and, um, you know, I didn't get on Brent's podcast, man, that guy hates me, like, what, what did I do? As opposed to, like, going, like, concluding, [00:35:00] making these conclusions. Oh, this sucks.

Oh, I can't lose weight. Oh, that, that's never gonna work out for me. Um, I'm never gonna book a show. I'm never gonna make more money. Like, whoa, those are all conclusions. And they're, they're dead ends, they're boxes that we put ourselves in. And they're the, the slow death of our soul. What if we just opened doors all day?

And the way to do that is just to ask these open ended statements. Um, how could this get, and our brain, you don't even have to answer it. Your brain will just in the background be like, yeah, this is actually quite nice. It's very interesting. It's one of those really cool things. Your mind is so much smarter than we, most people realize, like it is designed and so much more powerful and capable.

But when you start asking those questions, your mind automatically starts shifting towards looking for the answers, whether you consciously do it, but your brain starts looking at the day. Uh, we used to [00:36:00] have, and I, it's my bad. I, we got out of the practice with my daughters, but we used to have a gratitude practice where every night I asked them, said, you know, what's one thing somebody did for you today?

What's one thing you did for something for somebody else today? And what's one thing you're grateful for today, right? Because I wanted their minds in a positive place, uh, both gratitude and appreciation when they were going to bed, because I knew how important that was to settle the mind, right? My daughters didn't struggle with many nightmares or anything like that.

They they've had some, but they didn't struggle, especially when we were doing that. And you just putting those questions in your brain, your brain starts to try and sort those all out. And that's what you start looking for. I'm not a big person to, uh, I see these people on YouTube about manifestation, never been a big manifest guy, but I do understand the power of putting the right.

Questions and thoughts in your mind, because your brain will [00:37:00] start to look for solutions to those instead of all the negative one, 100%. Um, we're, we're playing this game in life, um, where maybe we have these things that we want to accomplish and we want to do, but the game actually starts. Uh, this game is happening 24 7 anyway, the game within the mind and most people, first of all, are unaware that there's of the depth of what's happening there.

And if, if our, of our belief systems and our thoughts are working against where we'd like to go. For example, this idea of, um, we've come back to the idea of losing weight a few times. So if we have this idea that, well, I can't, I can't do that. Or if we think, and this could be unconsciously that it should happen right away and it doesn't, well, all of a sudden that sets a trip wire, like, Oh, that's not going to work for me.

I said, this is [00:38:00] just the way I am. So as soon as we land on a conclusion, it, it sort of distills into an identity statement for us. Well, I'm not someone who can, I'm not. That's a box. I'm not we're confined to the box. We don't have a choice. Um, so, so everything you said is, is true. And, um, so, so to recognize that games occurring anyway, and to learn that you can play that this is the game to play and that the outside then will kind of play itself.

And I know that might sound a little bit weird, but that's how it works. Um, it's not about... The manifestation crowd's so funny, man, because it's like, I'm just gonna sit back and like, think about, think about this thing that I want to bring to me. It's like, if I sat in my office all day and didn't do anything, you think that like, this boat, like, I don't know [00:39:00] why I said boat, but, you think that's gonna show up on the doorstep?

Um, action is, is, is how we communicate, how we experience the universe, how we experience this plane. So like, you have to, you have to do stuff. Like if I didn't reach out to you because I reached out to you, I was like, Hey man, I really want to be on your podcast. Like I can't sit back and, and like, you don't know me.

Not until today and you're not gonna reach out out of the ether. You're not gonna be like scrolling through and be like that guy That's never gonna happen. So people we have to advocate for ourselves I'm gonna put my hand up and i'm gonna be like brent pick me. Here's why you should pick me and I think, I think you should, most people aren't comfortable doing that.

Like I wasn't comfortable doing that, [00:40:00] but you have to advocate for yourself. Like you, you have to get into the world. That's how you, that's how you manifest things is, is actions. Well, it's funny to use that example. Cause like I've never actually sought out a guest. I told you before we started recording, I was actually booked for the year already before you even reached out to me.

So I wasn't actively seeking guests and I've never actually actually sought out a guest. Like all of my guests have come to me, uh, on the same platform that you and I use there. And. So if you look at it from that side, right, if you aren't putting your hand up, not only am I not going to find you out of a list, I'm not even looking for you.

Exactly. Right. So becoming your own advocate, I learned that the hard way. A few times I got, I got passed over for some jobs and stuff like that because I thought, well. Yeah. [00:41:00] I don't quite fit everything they're looking for. So I'm not even going to try and make an argument that they should look at me anyway.

And I missed out on some really great promotions that way when I was in the, uh, the professional world and it's like, Oh yeah. And I saw who, in that case, I saw who got the job. I'm like, I'm super more qualified than that guy. I know him like he was a colleague. I know him. It's like, I know his qualifications.

I was super more qualified. But I didn't advocate for myself because I thought, well, I don't meet all of what they say they want. So I shouldn't even try and convince them that they should look past that and get me anyway. Well, sometimes, sometimes like this is so important because I ran my life by this idea.

And the idea was, uh, and this is such a spiritual bypass move. It's like, if it's meant to be, it'll happen. It's like, no, if it's meant to be, go make it happen. Like you have to, you have to be the greatest advocate for yourself and your life because Because no one else is going to, [00:42:00] well, people will advocate for you, but they will only do that if they see you advocating for yourself first.

So whether that's a job or like, you know, getting booked as a musician or getting on a podcast, it's like get, you've got to get out there. And in some cases, your employers don't even know what they're looking for. They're like, hey, this is what we think we want. And you'd be like, yo, this is what you actually need.

I'm the fit. Um, I don't, I had an idea what you were looking for, but I was like, hey, this is kind of what I bring to the table, yay or nay. And dude, you could have said no, and I'm grateful to be here, but it, it, it wouldn't have hurt me, like I would have been okay either way. And what a beautiful place to be, where I can go be in the world, I can put myself out there for everything that I want, and I'm good whether I get it or not.

Cause guess what, I'm just gonna keep putting myself out there. And, and I don't want your audience to think that I'm talking [00:43:00] about me. I'm saying, Oh, go do this for yourself. Yeah. Well, people don't understand. I had to be on the other side of the table at one point later in my career. Where's like, you know, when people put something out, whether it's, uh, on the platform where you and I connected or whether it's at a job, they're putting out a wishlist, right?

And people look at themselves and go, Oh, well, I'm not. No, no, they're putting out a loot wishlist and it's not a small wishlist. They're swinging for the fences and they know they're not necessarily going to give that, but if you write it, it's the old adage. If you shoot for the stars, you'll be a whole lot closer to flying than, uh.

Cause I, I, I've been on the other side of it now where I wrote like the job description for a team I used to work with. And my boss was like, uh, and I looked at what he, cause I wrote the base descriptions, like, this is what we need. And then he got ahold of it. And what he posted, I was like, that is not what I [00:44:00] wrote.

He's like, I know you can't afford the person with that resume, dude, for what we pay, you cannot afford the person with that resume, I can tell you what those skills cost you, you know, this is what we need, but. Everybody puts out that swinging for the fence on my show. I put, this is what I want. These are the kinds of guests I'm looking for.

Does everybody who asked to be on the show, check all those boxes? No, they check one box there. They're talking to men, right? That's I have low bar of entry, you know, but you put out these big ideas, but unless you advocate, you know, most people are not. It doesn't matter what you're looking at, whether you're looking at a new job, whether you're looking at trying to, you know, get in shape, right?

You have this idea in your head and everybody wants to be Chris Hemsworth or some, you know, Greek chiseled statue. And so we put that on, we put that in our head. It's like, you know, [00:45:00] that's an ultimate idea. And we, we are still worthy of trying to get there, whether we ever looked like that or not, but your brain automatically sets this bar so high and you're like, Oh, well, I'm never going to get there.

And you actually start to sabotage yourself. Actually, this makes a nice segue because that's where I want to go with this. You start to sabotage yourself before you ever get started. I sabotaged myself out of a really great job because I thought, Oh, well, I don't quite meet all those. Right. People screw up getting into healthier conditions with their life because they're like, Oh, I can never be Chris Hemsworth.

Well, you know, you make millions of dollars and can hire a personal chef, a personal trainer, a pertinent personal scheduler and everything else. And maybe you can, I don't know, but you got to try and go to the gym and try and make a healthier choice on dinner tonight [00:46:00] to even start that journey. We just take ourselves out of the mix.

Why, why do we cut ourselves out? Why do we sabotage ourselves so bad over and over again? That's a big question, man. Um, that's a really big question. I don't, you can't point to one. There's not one thing. Um, and we could probably tackle this a million different ways. But, um,

one of the things that we do is, so back to the job idea. And, and you see this list of things and you'd be like, well, you have this voice come in your head. It's like, well, I couldn't, I can't do that. So, back to the idea of me playing music on stage. I can't play on stage. So that, that's a, that's a thought.

That's a thought, man. It's a string of words. It's a string, it's a string of words that exists right here. [00:47:00] Like, in, in our mind. And the way that the brain works is it'll, it'll, it'll have a thought like that and then it will automatically say, and here's why. Have you, have you used ChatGPT? I have, I have.

Yeah, you give ChatGPT a prompt and then ChatGPT will write you an essay to fill in underneath that prompt. Your brain's the same way. So if you're like, well, I can't do that. So if you have this job that you're like, man, that would be awesome. I can't do that. Your brain's like, it's not just that your brain's saying, yo, you can't do that.

It believes it in that moment. And it gives you a list of reasons why, well I'm not qualified, like I've never done that job before, I, so it will, it will fill in, give you a list of evidence. The messed up thing is it will then go out into the world and create evidence to [00:48:00] support that, that statement. So let's say like this, this, this job gets posted and you're like, Oh, I don't qualify for that.

And then you see the hire, the guy that's going to hire, he's hiring into that job and he gives you a funny look. And you're like, see, Bob doesn't even like me. I'm never going to, I could never get that job. That's like, Bob didn't even look at you. He looked past you and you read into that. Because your brain needs to give you evidence that you're going to be correct about this.

And your listeners might be like, Luke, that's crazy. What are you talking about? But if you think about it from an evolutionary survival perspective, it's the way the brain works. So, if you, if you're walking 50, 000 years ago, and you hear this rustling behind you, and it's this, this, this bush, your brain doesn't go like, man, that's the wind.

Your brain doesn't go, uh, there's a little bunny back there. Your brain goes, tiger. Your brain goes, yo, you gotta, you gotta run. You have to run. Your brain doesn't, you don't stop to say, well, is there [00:49:00] really a tiger there? Your brain's like, no, tiger, you have to run. You have to get away from the potential threat.

So when you take that idea... And you're bringing it to the modern world where there's no tigers in my room, I'm good. But our survival mechanisms now play out to keep us safe, to keep us right where we are. So any deviation from our norm, any deviation from your norm, any deviation. So, so to whoever's listening, you have to think of what is normal in your life.

So that might be, look, I look a certain way. I feel a certain way. I actually think a certain way. Um, when I get home from work, I do certain things. Um, you know, I drive this kind of thing. So [00:50:00] all of those things creates our life situation, the context of our lives. We have actions in the world. We have the environment that we're in.

Then we have the internal world. We have the thoughts that we think, the beliefs that we have, and then we have our core concept, our core identity. And all of these things, they're like an echo chamber. So, core identity, results, which is the result of our actions, behaviors, so on and so forth, which spring forth from our thoughts.

We have this internal world, and we have this, our external world. So most people are working to change their external world, their results. We want to look differently. We want more money in the bank. We want more connected relationships, um, which is the result of different actions. Well, different results are a change of, of your environment.

It's a change, uh, your behaviors are a change. Now, if you want to change your behaviors, you actually have to think differently. [00:51:00] Um, instead of, oh my goodness. Um, you know what? I can't get that job. Well, wait a sec. Pause. What if I could get that job? So, that's a con we have on one hand a conclusion statement, I can't do this thing, versus a question that opens a door.

What if I could do that thing? Um, all of the things that I'm talking about, whether it's, um, results, behavior, habits, actions, thoughts. . Uh, underneath it all, we have core concepts. These are the way that we see ourselves. Um, so, um, a really healthy internal structure might be like, I'm capable of anything. I, I can do this, uh, you know, I can learn new things, but if, if people are anything like me, um, I have these core concepts, which were negation, so that looks like I'm not enough.

I'm [00:52:00] not safe was another one for me. So when we start to look at this internal structure and we start to say, Oh my goodness, like I have to, I have to change this if I want different results and we have to change our behaviors. If we want different results, if we want to lose weight, we have to maybe exercise a little bit more, maybe eat a little bit differently.

Um, all of those things, every single one of them represent change to the brain. Your brain doesn't want any of it. Your brain doesn't want more money. That sounds crazy, but it doesn't, it wants your comfort level. It doesn't want to be fit and healthy and vibrant. It wants you to do exactly what you've been doing because that's what it knows.

And when you get this, like, um, and then there's a, I won't go into that right now, but, um, even from a belief structure perspective, like to go from like, I can't do this, there's safety and I can't do this. There's safety and I can't get the job. Do you want to know what getting the job means? Newness. [00:53:00] New roles, new responsibilities.

Your brain's like, look, Bill can take that. I don't want it. But part of you does the first call. The call of your heart is like, I want that. I want that expansion. I want that growth. And then the second thoughts come in and they're like, no, no, no, you don't. You can't even do that in the first place. What do you think homeostasis homeostasis homeostasis for the human organism, for all of the results.

For the way that you think about yourself in the world, that concept applies. Your brain will resist you at every turn. That, that's why we sell sabotage. 92 percent of people don't reach their goals, period. And you look across industry. Um, I developed mindset training for, uh, realtors. The fail rate of realtors, 92%.

The fail rate of people trying to lose weight and get healthy is 92%. [00:54:00] The fail rate of coaches in the coaching industry. Do you want to guess what it is? 92%. It's 92%. This isn't, this isn't an industry thing. It's a human thing. It's a, it's a brain thing. People don't recognize how they have this internal structure that's set up against them.

But when you know it, and you can, you can see it playing out, so you have to become aware. I can't change anything that I'm not aware of.

And then the work is in the change. And that work is not linear. Because there's gonna be, there's gonna be external resistance. The people around you will be like, oh, what are you doing? There's gonna be internal resistance. You're gonna be like, whoa, what are you doing? Because part of you doesn't want to expand and grow because it goes against everything, uh, it goes against our [00:55:00] survival drive.

So, so, so to know that is empowering because you can work with it. You're not bound. I stepped on stage at 28. I believe that I had to be perfect. Remember, well, I can't do that. And then the brain will give you reasons why. And it can be really helpful. So like really practical, tangible. If you, if you want to do something in the world, start to write about your thoughts and feelings around doing that thing.

And you'll get to know your internal narrative very quickly. So around playing stage, to go from not playing music to playing on stage in front of like even one person, there's nothing that I could imagine that's more terrifying. Nothing. At 28, at 27, at 26, at 25. But I recognized that I was going to have a lifetime of evidence.

And ultimately be died on my deathbed, like you never stepped on stage, man. And in that moment, there was a, [00:56:00] I had regret looking back on my life, imagining myself on my deathbed. And I thought you're going to get on stage, even if it kills you. And so I did. And all of the internal structure of, well, you can't get on stage because you have to, you have to play music perfectly when you're playing for people and you know, you're not perfect.

No, it's not. What if you could play on stage? Let's go try. Is it comfortable? No. Is there growth there? Yes. So that was a lot. I could riff on this for hours, but, um, I think that's like a, it's an overview. Does that? Well, unfortunately that's, that's generally what we get stuck with on the show, right? We have to give kind of a higher overview and you guys will be able to, you'll have all the connections for Luke [00:57:00] in the descriptions and stuff like that.

So you guys can follow up even deeper with him. Uh, unfortunately the world still exists. I'm not Joe Rogan, so I can't do five hour interviews, but you know, for more, you can definitely hook up with Luke and go even deeper on these subjects. One of the things you mentioned, I just, I have to touch right at the beginning of it was, you know, there's not one reason why we self sabotage and I want you guys to hear that really clearly because often that's what we're looking for.

We're, we're, we're, we will run ourselves into the ground looking for that one, right? It's the same, it's the magic pill we're looking for, for weight loss, right? That, that three minute ab or 30 second ab, right? That magic bullet for weight loss. We do the same thing when we look at self sabotage. We're looking for that.

What, what's that, what's that one reason? It's not. And the reason you self sabotage in this [00:58:00] situation may be different than this situation. It goes down to those core components. You were talking to, I was trying not to laugh when you were talking. One of the first interviews I ever did was with the guy who trained stunt men and.

He was telling me a story about standing on top of this tower with this, the stunt man, and the guy was gonna have to jump off. It was like a massive jump onto this huge airbag. Right. And he said, and in that moment, when you're standing there looking 50 feet down and trusting your life to this airbag.

You have two choices. I'm going to jump or I'm not going to jump, right? There's no in between it's I'm fully committed that this is going to work and I'm going to see it through or I'm not doing it at all. And he was talking about what you put in your head. He said, every time I walked up to do that when I was a stuntman or do something like [00:59:00] that, it was.

I can do this right. And while we were talking, I actually made a joke. He's like, well, when you get in this situation, I said, well, I'm great at the moment. He's like, stop. That's it right there. The first t shirt we ever designed came out of that conversation. I have a t shirt that says I'm great at the moment because it was.

He's like, that's it. You just told your brain on the spot in the moment. You are great. And your brain went, Oh, okay. Then we can run with that. I love the example of chat GPT you gave. Cause I was an early adopter on chat GPT. And when it was still in beta, I got, I got in on the beta and started playing with it.

And I was just amazed that you could put one sentence in and get like this. But I never process it the way you just said it with your brain. You put that one thought in your brain just goes.

So we have to watch out [01:00:00] for concluding statements and I'm going to, I'm going to, it's okay if I reflect something back to you, I think you'll be open to it because you seem vulnerable and open. Um, but I think it'd be really powerful for your audience. Um, I think it'd be really powerful for your audience because these, these little limiting things, they'll slip out in conversation and, and, and we'll be unaware of them.

So I'm just going to hold up a mirror so that you're aware of this thing that you just said. Cause you've actually said this twice, uh, during our time together, Joe Rogan. Yeah, Joe Rogan. I can't do five hour podcasts. That's, that's a limitation. Um, cause you have an idea about what it means to be Joe Rogan.

It's like, okay, Joe Rogan has X amount of followers. He's got this, he's got, he's doing this in the world. He's got, you know, this again, this following this. So you, you have a concept in your head, just like chat TQT, where it's like, this is what Joe Rogan is your, your mind knows that. And you're like. But I'm not him, but you're not just saying you're not him you're saying I'm not [01:01:00] able to do this that that's that's the internal structure that's there.

So it's a limitation. Now, the question is like well so what, and maybe nothing, but maybe you do want to kind of be. Maybe you do want that reach maybe you do want that impact. Okay. Oh yeah. So, then we have to. So bring that internal dialogue internal structure to light. And then. Um, because man, you could act, this could actually be a four hour interview if you wanted it to be so that's the key is what do you want?

What do you want? So this is for your audience. What do you want? And not here, here. And then are you leaving the door open to that? Or are you closing the door by saying something like what just came out for you? Because if you are, it's incongruent. You're putting a door up and you're not putting it [01:02:00] outside.

It's inside. You can't even see the door. You have to see the door. My goal right now is to play on stage with the Dave Matthews Band. That would be cool. My favorite band. That would be really cool. Um, I've been a lifelong... So when I noticed that I had this thing happen, I was like, oh my god, I really do want to play with them.

Like, that would be amazing. That voice? You can never do that. Who are you to think that you could be on stage with those guys? Those guys are world class musicians. They wouldn't have you. Those are all conclusions. And so I just said in that moment, I was like, what if you could? What if you didn't close the door on possibility?

What if? Let's see what happens. Let's see what happens. Let's live in that space. There's a space there. And that's the invitation, is to live there. What if?[01:03:00]

Do I know? No! That's not the point. Your brain wants to know. Limiting beliefs, they only seem to differ in magnitude. There's no difference. It all exists here. So don't close doors. I'm not special. There's, there's nothing special. I just am aware now when I'm closing my doors, because there's a feeling there, and it's this feeling that I indicated to earlier.

It's a contraction. It's a closing off. It's a cutting off. We're not here to be cut off. We're here to be connected. Uh, connected with our dreams, connected with our wants. We're here to pursue them. We're here to do that. That's why. What's next for Luke Rossimo? Playing on stage with the Dave Matthews Band.

I'm looking forward to it. Yeah, I expect an email. You booked that gig. I don't, I don't like concerts. Mainly because I'm, I have some social anxiety about [01:04:00] large crowds. But seriously, I won't. Vancouver's not that far. It's like six hours. So I can make that trip. I would come to Vancouver to watch you play with Dave Matthews.

Um, I don't, I don't, I want to play one song. Um, is that now timeframes? Is that happening tomorrow? Probably not. Like, I won't close that door, but I'll say probably not going to happen. So it's like, I was just in the gorge last year to see them and they are playing better than ever, by the way. Um, that's where we're at.

Yeah. It's super amazing. I know the area. Um, so we don't put timelines on these things. So I have to say, what would it take to get there? Cause, cause it's not about wishy washy manifestation is what do I need to do to become the person that's doing that? I have to get, I have to play music. I have to release music.

I have to, when I practice, I gotta practice.[01:05:00]

So we create this internal structure of like, I'm a world class musician. And then the way that we talk about ourselves, they would be thrilled to have me.

So, um, that's the big, that's the big dream. Um, I have a couple businesses that I run and growth within those businesses. I have things that I do for that. I want to bench press 350 pounds, deadlift 500 pounds and squat 450 pounds. Those things. Um, I'm always working to deepen my connection with my wife.

That relationship is very important to me and to be the best father that I can. Um, all of those things mean putting myself first in the most selfish way. So little things like drinking water, um, eating well, sleeping basic things, my, the mindset practices that I have that allow me to, Mostly live in this [01:06:00] place of appreciation and joy because I get to show up a certain way with you when I feel good.

Just imagine yourself on your best day. It's like, what if we could bring that every day? Versus yourself on the worst day that you've ever had. There's a difference there. So this mindset work and the mindset practices are about, you know, really cultivating a practice, a practice. Because we all have these unconscious practices that we're carrying out anyway.

What if we just, Align our internal world and our external world with where we want to go. Um, and, and that's, that's, that's the work and that's the fun. Luke, where's the best place for people to connect with you to follow up on this conversation? Probably Facebook probably. Okay. Guys, as always, we'll have, you know, all the links so you can find Luke.

Cause I want you to be able to catch him after this conversation. So you can keep tags of him. Not only can you pursue this conversation farther, but you can also, you know, buy tickets when he signs up with Dave [01:07:00] Matthews. That's gonna be a good gig. Now I know you're all dying to know the highest grossing holiday movie ever, either A, a, Christmas Carol, B, home Alone, C, the Polar Express D The Grinch, r e Elf, you Guest Elf.

And the answer is The Grinch. It's the highest grossing holiday movie ever. The one with Jim Carrey? Uh, yeah. Yeah. No. Wow. Wow. That shocks me. No, I've seen that movie probably 27 times or more. Is it good? Like, I haven't even seen it and I'm judging it. Like, talk about being a human thing right there. It's one of my favorite shows.

Like it's, I can watch, I'll watch that in the middle of the summer. Like kids will walk in. I'm, I'm randomly watching, you know, the Grinch with Jim Carrey. My wife's calling me out. Yeah. I have seen times in that middle of the summer, a hundred degrees outside. I'm watching the Jim Carrey Grinch. Uh, that's awesome.

Just randomly. They're like. Dad, it's July. [01:08:00] Yeah, that's your point. Um, I just, I love it. It's, it's one of those guilty pleasure movies I can just watch anytime. No, I would have gone with diehard, but I knew the answer to the question. So did that do better? Is that really a Christmas movie? Like it came out at Christmas, but it's not a Christmas movie joke, right?

Well, that's the joke, right? But there, there, there's two kinds of diehard fans. There's those that think is a Christmas movie and those things not. Uh, Bruce Willis even makes jokes about online still today about it. It's not a Christmas movie and the director has been like, no, it was a Christmas movie.

Huh? It still gets debated on Facebook. I was laughing about it. Uh, like this year around Christmas because I'm like Christmas movies. My wife and I used to watch it every year for Christmas. Uh, the first, the first two happen on the Christmas holiday while he's going to see his family for Christmas. So I feel like it's an action movie that happens to take place on Christmas, but home alone is essentially the same thing, right?[01:09:00]

It's a family going somewhere to celebrate Christmas and the kid gets left behind. It's about him surviving, being left behind. It's not actually about Christmas. Interesting point, man. That's a good argument right there. That's good. My wife says it's totally a Christmas music, uh, Christmas movie. Uh, that's, that's all our diehard fans out there.

Sorry guys, we're, we're Christmas movie, diehard fans. Well, before the kids, we were like, watch the entire series on Christmas day. Wow. Yeah. Yeah. Luke. What is the most, if, if someone hears nothing else today, what is the most important thing you want them to hear as we wrap up the show?

Um, do you remember what I said earlier about the, if, uh, if I could talk to one person? Um, so the reason that I do these podcasts, a big reason is, uh, [01:10:00] because I used to feel like I was, there was something wrong with me. And there's, there's this misnomer in the world of like self-development. Um, that there's a self to develop and that creates a problem because what the, what the inference there is.

Is that you need to be developed, that you're not okay and you're not enough as you are. And so, I like to make the distinction that, um, you're good. And, and you're enough. And there's nothing, there's nothing missing. And you're not missing anything. And when you feel safe enough to explore and begin to accept and then begin to express who you are at your core.

Um, life gets a lot easier, and [01:11:00] then to make the distinction that there are skills that can be developed, um, and, you know, if, if you want to do different things in the world, um, it would be worthwhile to develop those, but you, at your core, you're good. There's, there's nothing missing. All right. You're enough.

NUFF. Sorry. Reference to an old, an old episode I did, uh, was, it was a beautiful father. You should go back and watch the episodes and find it. It's a beautiful father daughter story about her diving into the dark, dark time. And one night he told her you're enough. And the way he said it, he laid into the Nuff part of it and then became a joke.

Now they run a clothing line for, for young people to encourage them. It says in UFF, I'm enough. So I love what you're saying, man. Oh, I even hate to follow that one. I'm sorry. I was [01:12:00] like. But I, but I love that saying, uh, to, to a huge extent, Luke, thank you for taking the time to be on the show today and having this conversation with us guys as always be better tomorrow because what you do today, and we'll see you on the next one.

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