Unlocking Your Manhood: How to be a Man in Today's Society

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Who is the man?

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I mean, close your eyes
and think about manly men.

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Who is it you see in your head and yell?

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Hell yeah, that's a fucking man,
depending on the decade you're born.

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There's a variety of imagery that
may be going through your head.

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Lee Marvin, Clint Eastwood, John
Wayne, Sly Thelon, The Rock, Vin

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Diesel, James Dean, The Fonz, maybe
you're seeing a character more

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than the actor themselves, right?

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Maybe Tommy Shelby from Peaky
Blinders or John Wayne from any

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number of movies, or maybe James
Bond, man, you're James Bond, man.

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Our.

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In this era, John Wicker,
Jason Bourne, right?

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Men's men.

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How about King Leonidas from 300?

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Like that was that kind of manly man.

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Right.

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You get the point.

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We all have that picture in our head.

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The first time I walked into a
sportsman's warehouse store, I don't

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know if they have the works where you
live that they have them where I live,

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they had a picture of John Wayne, the
Duke matted leather and a hardwood

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frame right there in every doorway.

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I thought, hell yeah, this
has got to be a good store.

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The problem is, well, all of
these people had awesome traits.

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We admired about them for whatever reason,
their real life doesn't always match up

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because most of them are actors, right?

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TV movies, whatever.

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Especially now.

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So what is required to be a man in
this modern world that we live in?

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Well, today we're going to
talk about that on the show.

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And I'm going to hook you up with 10, 10
things that you need to develop in your

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life to be a man in this modern world.

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Let's get into it.

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Here's the million dollar question.

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How do men like us reach our full
potential growing to the men we

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dream of being while taking care
of our responsibilities, working,

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being good husbands, fathers,
and still take care of ourselves.

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Well, that's the big
question in this podcast.

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We'll help you answer
those questions and more.

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My name is Brent and welcome
to the Fallible Man podcast.

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Now, being a Gen Xer, I could
take all kinds of potshots at the

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following generations, but the
truth is the generation before me

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had complaints about us and how.

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I'm sure.

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And the generations before them
definitely whined about them too.

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So a more accurate thought, there were
some advantages to growing up when I did.

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I think we had a lot of really cool
things growing up with Gen Xers.

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Gen Xers.

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I think some of the younger generations
now missed out on a lot, because there

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were definitely advantages that I had
and I can see it just raising my own kids

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at the difference in the world they're
raising up that they're living in now.

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There are young people who have
outpaced me, however, in so many areas

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already because of those differences.

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So I'm glad for them.

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I'm glad there are differences between
the generations and I wish I had been

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taught things like entrepreneurship.

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At a much younger age.

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And that's something that younger
generations are getting exposed to

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much early on, thanks to the internet.

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Yes, I am old enough that we
didn't always have readily

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available internet for everybody.

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One question that's always existed,
however, in every generation of

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men that the answer has continued
to evolve is, where is my place

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in this world as a man and what
does that look like as modern men?

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By the way, my name is Brent and
welcome to the Fallible Man Podcast.

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You're home for all things, man,
big shout out to fallible nation.

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That's what I call our
long time listeners.

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And Hey, we'd love to have you join that
and welcome to our first time listeners.

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Thanks for checking us out really
from the bottom of my heart.

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I know there's a lot competing for your
time, so I hope you really enjoy the show.

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Be sure and connect with me at the
fallible man on most social media

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platforms, while Instagram is where I am
the most active, I will be sure to respond

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and just let me know what you thought
of the show and if you get something

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out of it, Hey, you can leave us review.

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That'd be nice, but share it
with somebody who needs it.

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That that's even better, right?

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Our goal is to reach out and
touch as many lives as possible.

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And you sharing this with a friend is
the biggest compliment you ever give us.

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Now, my grandfather
fought in world war two.

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What a man was then was very different
than who my father was as a man.

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The man I've learned to become is not
exactly the same as my father or my

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grandfather and the little boys that
are growing up now into our future.

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Well, the way they look at being a man
is going to be a little bit different.

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Now there are some traits and roles
that will always stay the same.

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Many will change with our rapidly
changing environment and reality.

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Cause that's just the world, right?

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It's Utterly nuts these days,
how quick things are changing.

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However, today I want to share 10
things that are required to be men

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in this modern era and going forward.

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Some will be added over time
as the era continues on in

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the future comes into view.

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Some might fall away, but for today
and in the current generation,

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hopefully in the next few, these
10 things are absolutely critical.

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To be a man.

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Number one, you need to
have a North star metric.

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Now in business, this is the motivation
that drives you and will continue to

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align all your decisions and actions
to stay on point with your business.

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Most commonly in business
is one of three things.

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It's income driven, it's time
driven, or it's impact driven.

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As a man, you're going to have to
decide what your North star metric is.

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It will be about having more freedom of
time, more resources, or bigger impact.

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Most likely because it usually
mirrors the whole business thing

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as well, but not necessarily.

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You can say, well, Brent
money buys all that.

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No, it really doesn't.

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It comes close.

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It definitely comes close.

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I'm not going to argue that, but there
will be a moment where you have to

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decide to trade one for the other,
specifically a moment where you have

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to trade freedom, impact or money
for one of the other ones, right?

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It will be a hard choice, but you're
really going to find out what shines

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for you because you will have to make
that decision sooner or later, more

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money, more time, or more freedom.

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However you want to say that number
two, you need to plant a flag.

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What hill are you willing to die on?

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I mean, hopefully in a figurative
manner, but maybe not a man needs

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to work out where he stands on
things in his life that he sees.

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As beyond is important, beyond
important as well as what's really not.

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I was asked on a podcast one time, how I
became so apathetic about a lot of things.

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There's my 50 cent word for the episode.

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The truth is I stopped caring
about things that have no impact

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or meaning on the things that
I find out are important to me.

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I truthfully couldn't care one way
or another about a lot of things.

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I have too much of my life.

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It's important to me.

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To waste emotional energy on things.

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I just don't care about now.

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Some people see it as a plus or
minus, but really like you can ask

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me about things and nine times out
of 10, the answer is don't care.

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A man needs to have an opinion,
but on things that matter,

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that opinion, maybe don't care.

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Unfortunately, people around me probably
hear that a little more than they want to.

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But he needs to know what's important
to him, what's worth fighting

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for, and what's worth dying for.

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It will really give you a solid
foundation for the rest of your life.

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There is nothing wrong with deciding
I care about this and the rest of it.

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Well, it's really inconsequential.

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I'm not saying that there aren't other
things outside of what I care about.

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I'm saying, I just don't spend
the emotional energy on things

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that aren't a value to me.

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So I don't really get worked up over what
restaurant I go to or things like that.

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Because.

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Really?

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I don't care.

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I'm going to eat, man.

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I'll eat something.

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I'll find something I like
at this restaurant or that.

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So figure out what's important to you.

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What hill you're willing to die
on plant that flag as a man,

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because that's part of being a man.

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You have to have an opinion on what's
important, what has value and what's not.

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Number three.

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Your physical health.

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This is a hill I'm willing to die on.

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Like it or not, a man's whole world
is tied up in his physical health.

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The world has no respect
for an unhealthy man.

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Women can lie all they
want about the dad bod BS.

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Part of that social pressure,
some part of that's generational.

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Part of that's women who don't want to
have to take care of themselves as well.

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But women have no respect for an
unhealthy man, no matter what they say.

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Society has no respect
for an unhealthy man.

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You're judged by your
health in every interaction.

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Don't argue with me based on fairness,
because that's a bunch of crap.

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Nobody cares.

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Fairness doesn't exist.

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Whether you are trying to get a date,
interview for a new job, or just walking

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into the store, you're being sized up
based on your external health markers.

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Plus, most things we're valued for as
men are largely based on our health.

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If you don't believe me, Roll that thought
around on your head for a little while and

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really, really start to think about it.

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And I promise you, when you start to
analyze your life, there are a lot of

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times in your life, most of the times that
you are going to be gauged on your health.

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I actually just talked to an
image consultant on the podcast.

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That will be later this year.

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I'll share that episode with you guys, but
it's one of the things we both agreed on.

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She tends to focus on outer things like
the clothes you wear and the way you take

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care of your hygiene and stuff like that.

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But she agreed, your physical health
absolutely impacts every interaction

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and the way people judge you.

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It may not be fair, but no one cares.

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That's just how it is.

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So as a man, you need to take care of your
physical health because it will largely

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impact every other part of your life.

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Number four, men to be
men need to have purpose.

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We'll see if I can get the
banner up for the YouTube people.

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This may be a lifelong purpose, but
it doesn't have to be, but it can be.

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Are you confused yet?

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You have to have a purpose.

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And more importantly, you have
to align with your purpose.

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Otherwise you're going to feel like
there's a hole, no matter what.

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Men frequently mistake that hole
is needing a female or needing

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materials or something like that.

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Men are largely mission
oriented and having a mission

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is not finding your purpose.

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And it will not fill that hole.

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You're going to have lots
of missions in your life.

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Happiness is not alignment
with your purpose.

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You can be happy and not
be living your purpose.

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You just won't feel whole.

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I'm trying to emphasize, I hope I'm
getting this clear, feeling whole and

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complete is not the same thing as having
them being in line with your purpose.

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Well, I'm afraid to start feeling whole
and complete is something that comes from

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living in alignment with your purpose.

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It is not something that is
necessarily based on your happiness.

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We do a lot of things for short
burst of heartbeat, happiness, right?

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Some people drink, some people
party, some people go spend

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lots of money on themselves that
makes you happy in the moment.

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It doesn't make you complete
living in alignment with your

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purpose, makes you feel complete.

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So find your purpose, seek it
with conviction and enthusiasm.

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You're going to have many, very
missions throughout your life.

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And not all of them will be in
alignment with your purpose.

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But once you find your purpose, you can
align your missions with your purpose.

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As a bonus, finding your purpose
will attract the right kind of women

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into your life, if that's something
that you still haven't figured out.

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Line up yet.

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Women are attracted to men with a
purpose, men who know what their

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purpose are unpopular opinion.

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Let me throw all this
out there as a young man.

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I think you should focus on
your purpose and finding and

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aligning with your purpose.

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Over women, the right kind of women
will be attracted to you because

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a, you have a purpose and it's the
purpose that she sees and believes

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in and can align herself with.

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And the right kind of woman
will be aligned, attracted to,

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and will want to align with.

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With said purpose.

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And then you have a force multiplier in
a really powerful way in a woman who is

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aligned with your purpose and your goals
and your mission, find your purpose.

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00:13:31,440 --> 00:13:35,530
It's absolutely necessary
as a man number five.

231
00:13:35,530 --> 00:13:36,770
And it looks like I lost the light.

232
00:13:36,770 --> 00:13:41,470
If you guys are watching this on YouTube,
so you don't have to look at me as much.

233
00:13:41,470 --> 00:13:42,760
So that may be a bonus for you.

234
00:13:43,290 --> 00:13:44,050
Number five.

235
00:13:44,900 --> 00:13:47,510
Man to be a man needs to find his tribe.

236
00:13:49,979 --> 00:13:54,189
I was the guiltiest of all when it
comes to the whole buying the whole

237
00:13:54,189 --> 00:13:58,699
lone wolf scenario, I didn't spend
much time with groups of men until the

238
00:13:58,699 --> 00:14:03,969
last couple of years, but since the
earliest days of mankind, we've come

239
00:14:03,970 --> 00:14:09,380
together in communities while many men
have a solitary nature to themselves.

240
00:14:09,819 --> 00:14:11,400
They still need a tribe.

241
00:14:12,340 --> 00:14:14,410
A tribe is where you
come to exchange ideas.

242
00:14:14,735 --> 00:14:17,745
To learn from elder men who
have more experience to level

243
00:14:17,745 --> 00:14:20,185
up who you are takes a tribe.

244
00:14:20,915 --> 00:14:24,305
A tribe is a group of trusted men who
are in fellowship with each other.

245
00:14:24,609 --> 00:14:26,280
For common goals and interests.

246
00:14:27,170 --> 00:14:31,849
It can take many different forms and
there's not an ultimately right form.

247
00:14:32,099 --> 00:14:34,650
As long as it has certain pieces to it.

248
00:14:35,210 --> 00:14:38,840
This may be a faith based men's group,
or maybe a group of friends you go to the

249
00:14:38,840 --> 00:14:45,539
range with and drink coffee and shoot guns
while you talk, it might be a group of

250
00:14:45,560 --> 00:14:48,740
guys you play games with, whatever it is.

251
00:14:50,324 --> 00:14:52,605
You know, you found the right tribe.

252
00:14:52,615 --> 00:15:00,104
When you can exchange value with them, you
bring some areas and ideas into it that

253
00:15:00,124 --> 00:15:01,925
improve the other guys in your circle.

254
00:15:02,145 --> 00:15:07,004
They also bring in some different ideas
and different areas and value the ups you

255
00:15:07,004 --> 00:15:11,254
in the circle together, you inspire and
encourage each other and you come away a

256
00:15:11,254 --> 00:15:14,525
little better every time that is a tribe.

257
00:15:15,185 --> 00:15:15,905
Don't mistake.

258
00:15:16,175 --> 00:15:19,385
A tribe with a bunch of guys that
you're just wasting time with

259
00:15:19,645 --> 00:15:21,335
because that's far more common.

260
00:15:22,095 --> 00:15:25,075
If your tribe isn't helping you
level up and you're not helping them

261
00:15:25,075 --> 00:15:26,785
level up, you're not in a tribe.

262
00:15:27,584 --> 00:15:31,065
You're in a group of guys who just didn't
outgrow it or haven't grown into it.

263
00:15:31,324 --> 00:15:32,035
One of the other.

264
00:15:32,435 --> 00:15:37,285
So look, you don't have to solve world
hunger together, but at the very least

265
00:15:37,295 --> 00:15:42,715
they should help you want to be and help
you become a better person and vice versa.

266
00:15:43,649 --> 00:15:47,650
So tribe guys, it's absolutely
crucial to be a man.

267
00:15:50,079 --> 00:15:52,270
Number six is growth mindset.

268
00:15:53,280 --> 00:15:58,119
Now growth mindsets are really important
and you probably hear that buzzword

269
00:15:58,720 --> 00:16:00,879
all the time on the internet, right?

270
00:16:00,879 --> 00:16:02,550
It's really popular term these days.

271
00:16:03,280 --> 00:16:07,050
And still very few people actually
understand the value of a growth

272
00:16:07,050 --> 00:16:10,170
mindset, no matter how much is
talked about on social media.

273
00:16:10,790 --> 00:16:13,989
So gone are the days when men were just
allowed to live the simple existence

274
00:16:13,989 --> 00:16:20,380
of going to work, coming home, minimal
interaction with family, chill, and just

275
00:16:20,390 --> 00:16:22,555
trust your, Children know they're loved.

276
00:16:23,115 --> 00:16:25,215
There were some generations
where this is very common.

277
00:16:25,715 --> 00:16:26,965
It's not there.

278
00:16:27,265 --> 00:16:30,444
It's not now and it's not how
you're a man in this day and age.

279
00:16:31,205 --> 00:16:33,964
It's not enough to have reached
the milestone of what you call

280
00:16:33,974 --> 00:16:35,284
the American dream, right?

281
00:16:35,285 --> 00:16:36,575
We all know the American dream.

282
00:16:36,865 --> 00:16:38,904
House, car, two and a half kids.

283
00:16:38,905 --> 00:16:41,745
I still have never figured out how
they came up with two and a half kids.

284
00:16:42,195 --> 00:16:43,995
That sounds really complicated.

285
00:16:45,305 --> 00:16:48,275
It's not enough to have
reached the milestones that

286
00:16:48,314 --> 00:16:50,074
we were told are, that's it.

287
00:16:50,925 --> 00:16:53,905
Kids expect parents to be
more involved than ever.

288
00:16:54,275 --> 00:16:57,265
Your spouse demands your
time and emotional energy.

289
00:16:57,495 --> 00:16:59,875
They also expect you
to listen and connect.

290
00:17:01,264 --> 00:17:03,045
You must be active in your community.

291
00:17:03,045 --> 00:17:04,414
You got to care about things.

292
00:17:04,414 --> 00:17:06,954
You must continue to grow
professionally and personally.

293
00:17:07,444 --> 00:17:08,894
Oh, so frustrating.

294
00:17:09,504 --> 00:17:10,454
No, it's not guys.

295
00:17:10,615 --> 00:17:11,185
Let me say this.

296
00:17:11,435 --> 00:17:13,175
This is not a bad thing.

297
00:17:14,075 --> 00:17:19,025
It's not because you're capable of
all of it, but you're going to have to

298
00:17:19,025 --> 00:17:21,925
adopt a growth mindset as a modern man.

299
00:17:22,565 --> 00:17:23,724
Are you going to fall short?

300
00:17:25,165 --> 00:17:29,795
This is just basic survival as
a man in modern, the modern era.

301
00:17:30,564 --> 00:17:33,875
You can't just cruise through life and.

302
00:17:34,850 --> 00:17:36,370
Wonder about aimlessly.

303
00:17:36,830 --> 00:17:42,940
You have to engage and you have
to have that growth mindset, or

304
00:17:42,940 --> 00:17:45,669
you're going to just fight the
struggle bus all the way along.

305
00:17:47,010 --> 00:17:53,230
Number seven, you have to have a plan
for a plan for a plan for a plan.

306
00:17:53,730 --> 00:17:55,240
We no longer live in the old west.

307
00:17:55,240 --> 00:17:59,310
You can't just drift aimlessly
and the world has no more

308
00:17:59,310 --> 00:18:01,130
room for useless individuals.

309
00:18:01,830 --> 00:18:02,800
You have a North star.

310
00:18:02,800 --> 00:18:04,080
We talked about that earlier.

311
00:18:04,310 --> 00:18:05,360
You know, what's important.

312
00:18:05,369 --> 00:18:05,740
Um, and.

313
00:18:06,095 --> 00:18:08,415
You're seeking a purpose, right?

314
00:18:08,415 --> 00:18:09,245
We talked about it too.

315
00:18:10,105 --> 00:18:14,195
You need a plan to guide the growth
mindset and to take care of your

316
00:18:14,195 --> 00:18:15,714
health, to achieve those goals.

317
00:18:16,485 --> 00:18:20,895
More importantly, you need a backup
plan for when the plan goes to shit,

318
00:18:21,604 --> 00:18:25,564
then be able to pivot when that doesn't
work out either, and ultimately have

319
00:18:25,564 --> 00:18:31,855
the fortitude to regroup, recover,
and come up with a new plan, see.

320
00:18:33,065 --> 00:18:39,135
You have to have resilience to go
with your plan because guess what?

321
00:18:40,295 --> 00:18:44,745
It's not going to go right the first time
or the second time or the third time.

322
00:18:45,745 --> 00:18:52,664
One of the best lines in the entire
Harry Potter movie series is in the

323
00:18:52,664 --> 00:18:57,895
last book or if you're in the movies,
it's seven B the second half of seven.

324
00:18:59,725 --> 00:19:02,945
And the three main characters are talking.

325
00:19:03,480 --> 00:19:06,430
And they come up with this
really kind of rash idea.

326
00:19:07,240 --> 00:19:09,800
And they're like, no,
we got to make a plan.

327
00:19:09,810 --> 00:19:10,970
Hermione, the sensible one.

328
00:19:11,160 --> 00:19:12,670
It's like, no, we got to make a plan.

329
00:19:13,100 --> 00:19:17,000
And Harry's like, when have any
of our plans ever actually worked?

330
00:19:17,280 --> 00:19:20,370
We plan, we get there
all hell breaks loose.

331
00:19:21,819 --> 00:19:24,049
Well, that's more common
than we want to admit.

332
00:19:24,049 --> 00:19:27,810
A lot of times we like to pretend
all our plans go in order.

333
00:19:28,175 --> 00:19:31,025
But usually we're like on plan G H K.

334
00:19:31,025 --> 00:19:33,935
We're way down the line before
anything actually works out.

335
00:19:34,784 --> 00:19:36,485
It's part of the learning curve for life.

336
00:19:36,794 --> 00:19:41,034
So you have to have a plan, but guys,
you have to have resilience along

337
00:19:41,034 --> 00:19:44,684
with that, because your plan is going
to be retooled, retooled, retooled,

338
00:19:44,865 --> 00:19:47,034
pivot, change, new plan, backup plan.

339
00:19:47,075 --> 00:19:47,854
Oh my goodness.

340
00:19:48,065 --> 00:19:49,064
What are we doing?

341
00:19:49,905 --> 00:19:52,215
You got to have the
resilience for your plans.

342
00:19:53,955 --> 00:19:55,715
And so maybe that's a twofer.

343
00:19:56,275 --> 00:19:57,085
We'll call it that.

344
00:19:58,375 --> 00:20:01,095
Number eight, guys, you have
to have emotional intelligence.

345
00:20:01,125 --> 00:20:02,055
Oh my goodness.

346
00:20:02,055 --> 00:20:03,505
Brent, you're asking too much.

347
00:20:03,505 --> 00:20:06,374
Now I can hear the groans already.

348
00:20:06,844 --> 00:20:08,905
No, we're talking about a mode.

349
00:20:08,945 --> 00:20:09,265
No.

350
00:20:09,355 --> 00:20:09,665
Okay.

351
00:20:09,665 --> 00:20:13,974
Modern men in keeping with the changing
demand and the way we live as people

352
00:20:13,984 --> 00:20:16,225
these days, Must develop their EQ.

353
00:20:17,804 --> 00:20:20,755
All of your relationships
demand it, right?

354
00:20:20,755 --> 00:20:25,334
We live in a quote unquote, more
sensitive society now that that's

355
00:20:25,355 --> 00:20:28,445
probably being a little harsh, but
people talk about their feelings.

356
00:20:28,504 --> 00:20:30,604
People are more about their feelings.

357
00:20:30,604 --> 00:20:31,495
It's really weird.

358
00:20:31,835 --> 00:20:32,615
Almost too.

359
00:20:32,785 --> 00:20:37,375
Well, I will say people are more about
their feelings to a detrimental level at

360
00:20:37,375 --> 00:20:41,885
this point, but it doesn't mean that you
don't have to deal with your families.

361
00:20:42,004 --> 00:20:45,024
Your feelings just can't
let them be absurd.

362
00:20:45,525 --> 00:20:50,775
More importantly, having a good
emotional intelligence, intelligence

363
00:20:50,775 --> 00:20:53,325
will keep you from doing stupid things.

364
00:20:54,365 --> 00:20:58,375
While many of you know, I
believe in principles, including.

365
00:20:58,825 --> 00:21:02,865
Mastering your emotions and not
letting your emotions control you.

366
00:21:03,304 --> 00:21:08,585
It has not changed the fact that men
have emotions and we need to get better

367
00:21:08,595 --> 00:21:13,985
at processing them in a healthy way,
prisons are full of men who let their

368
00:21:13,985 --> 00:21:17,644
emotions get the better of them and
did not process them in a healthy way.

369
00:21:19,324 --> 00:21:24,804
In case I need to spell it out, bearing
your emotions, it's not processing

370
00:21:25,125 --> 00:21:27,304
them in a healthy way or at all.

371
00:21:28,014 --> 00:21:33,014
And doing that, burying those emotions
just sets you up for the possible

372
00:21:33,264 --> 00:21:35,514
possibility of a catastrophic failure.

373
00:21:36,215 --> 00:21:41,835
In a key moment in your life, burying
those emotions just ends up with more

374
00:21:41,835 --> 00:21:46,675
prison population because we fly off
the handle and do something stupid and

375
00:21:46,675 --> 00:21:50,735
punch the dude that desperately deserved
it, but we know we're going to jail.

376
00:21:50,735 --> 00:21:56,684
If we do, it's not worth screwing
up the rest of your life because you

377
00:21:56,684 --> 00:22:01,205
didn't take the time to master your
emotions, learn to process them in

378
00:22:01,205 --> 00:22:03,725
healthy ways and keep moving forward.

379
00:22:04,190 --> 00:22:07,190
Man, we can't get by without it anymore.

380
00:22:07,259 --> 00:22:12,550
It's a requirement because we live
in a litigious society that will not

381
00:22:12,560 --> 00:22:18,110
let us express certain emotions the
way that some of us are prone to.

382
00:22:18,679 --> 00:22:24,149
So emotional intelligence guys, to be a
man in this modern era, you have to master

383
00:22:24,150 --> 00:22:26,479
your emotions and get them under control.

384
00:22:27,239 --> 00:22:29,290
Now we already touched on it a
little bit, and I'm gonna say

385
00:22:29,290 --> 00:22:31,219
number nine is resilience, right?

386
00:22:31,419 --> 00:22:35,229
We touched on this just a
little bit in number seven, my

387
00:22:35,229 --> 00:22:36,750
sixth grade wrestling coach.

388
00:22:37,185 --> 00:22:39,675
May have taught me one of the
most valuable lessons anybody

389
00:22:39,675 --> 00:22:40,785
has taught me in my life.

390
00:22:41,545 --> 00:22:43,475
And that's the lesson of resilience.

391
00:22:43,990 --> 00:22:48,560
Now he had a particular way of
addressing this every day in practice.

392
00:22:48,629 --> 00:22:52,930
We ran one drill, alternating
our starting positions.

393
00:22:52,930 --> 00:22:54,680
If you know about wrestling,
there's two starting positions.

394
00:22:54,680 --> 00:22:56,839
There's opposition and the down position.

395
00:22:56,839 --> 00:22:58,699
No, we're not talking about WWE.

396
00:23:00,400 --> 00:23:06,770
We did take down and escape drills for
10 minutes at a time for 10 minutes.

397
00:23:06,780 --> 00:23:07,959
Our practice partner.

398
00:23:08,645 --> 00:23:12,645
Hit us over and over again with
takedowns and drove us into the

399
00:23:12,645 --> 00:23:14,415
mat over and over and over again.

400
00:23:14,764 --> 00:23:19,564
We had to break the takedown escape
and immediately start over again in

401
00:23:19,564 --> 00:23:22,655
that position or that down position,
depending on which one it was.

402
00:23:25,590 --> 00:23:28,500
We would do this for 10 minutes and
then we'd switch roles and we'd do

403
00:23:28,500 --> 00:23:29,690
it to our partner for 10 minutes.

404
00:23:29,690 --> 00:23:35,220
That way we learned to get up and
escape, no matter how beat down and

405
00:23:35,220 --> 00:23:40,809
exhausted we were, we did over and over
again, every single day in practice,

406
00:23:41,349 --> 00:23:45,980
after we had already done 20 minutes of
this, which is physically exhausting.

407
00:23:47,140 --> 00:23:51,760
We continue to train for stamina
because after 10 minutes apiece,

408
00:23:51,780 --> 00:23:54,310
we ran for the next 15 minutes.

409
00:23:56,400 --> 00:24:01,840
Only stopping to bust out pushups, sit
ups, up downs, and then back to running.

410
00:24:02,070 --> 00:24:03,380
We're not talking to jog guys.

411
00:24:03,380 --> 00:24:11,109
They ran us, our team had one of
the greatest records in our district

412
00:24:11,259 --> 00:24:14,820
because of this resilience training.

413
00:24:15,550 --> 00:24:16,709
There was no quit.

414
00:24:16,779 --> 00:24:18,650
You had to technically outscore us.

415
00:24:19,024 --> 00:24:26,634
Because you couldn't pin us because
our coaches drove this in 35

416
00:24:26,654 --> 00:24:33,835
minutes, solid breaking us down to
an exhaustive level that most people

417
00:24:33,835 --> 00:24:39,765
don't understand and making us get up
over and over and over again, life will

418
00:24:39,765 --> 00:24:44,484
drive you to the ground mercilessly
over and over again, as Rocky said.

419
00:24:45,955 --> 00:24:50,285
It's how you get up and press on that
defines you, not the exact quote.

420
00:24:50,315 --> 00:24:50,635
Sorry.

421
00:24:50,635 --> 00:24:54,665
I should have like dropped the Rocky
voice, but I'm like, Hey, that's not how

422
00:24:54,665 --> 00:24:56,855
hard you get to get hit and get back up.

423
00:24:57,015 --> 00:24:58,905
It's a horrible Rocky impersonation.

424
00:24:58,905 --> 00:25:04,684
I hope Sly doesn't hear that one, but
guys, resilience is critical and you

425
00:25:04,695 --> 00:25:07,845
build resilience by doing hard things.

426
00:25:07,845 --> 00:25:11,625
It's not fun things, not exciting things.

427
00:25:11,895 --> 00:25:14,335
You build resilience by doing hard things.

428
00:25:14,335 --> 00:25:17,434
So challenge yourself and build
that resilience because you will

429
00:25:17,434 --> 00:25:18,725
not survive as a man without it.

430
00:25:19,884 --> 00:25:24,524
Now, number 10 is perhaps one of the
most important and that is discipline.

431
00:25:25,274 --> 00:25:27,895
And man is nothing without
this four letter word.

432
00:25:28,095 --> 00:25:28,415
Yes.

433
00:25:28,415 --> 00:25:31,245
I know it doesn't actually have
four letters, but it's a four

434
00:25:31,245 --> 00:25:32,655
letter word for some of us.

435
00:25:33,205 --> 00:25:34,955
This separates the men from the boys.

436
00:25:35,474 --> 00:25:38,135
This defines success and failure.

437
00:25:39,025 --> 00:25:43,065
I've done full episodes on
discipline because discipline

438
00:25:43,065 --> 00:25:44,715
is that incredibly important.

439
00:25:45,384 --> 00:25:46,355
Discipline's hard.

440
00:25:46,735 --> 00:25:50,665
I'm not going to lie,
but it makes a man great.

441
00:25:52,080 --> 00:25:55,650
Discipline is critical to make
all the rest of this work.

442
00:25:55,920 --> 00:25:57,730
Without discipline, your life falls apart.

443
00:25:57,730 --> 00:26:02,340
Without discipline, these other nine
things will not function in your life.

444
00:26:04,060 --> 00:26:10,909
Now, some of you more astute listeners
may have realized or noticed that I

445
00:26:10,919 --> 00:26:16,744
have not said even once in this entire
list, anything about biology or social

446
00:26:16,744 --> 00:26:19,185
constructs, Are how someone identifies.

447
00:26:19,885 --> 00:26:24,365
If you're confused about the biological
science required for this discussion,

448
00:26:24,725 --> 00:26:26,765
you're probably in the wrong place.

449
00:26:27,824 --> 00:26:29,564
And I'll leave that at that.

450
00:26:30,365 --> 00:26:35,114
Navigating what it means to be in a
man in today's world requires both

451
00:26:35,195 --> 00:26:37,685
timeless values and modern challenges.

452
00:26:38,184 --> 00:26:41,945
Looking back at famous figures who
once represented the very essence

453
00:26:41,945 --> 00:26:47,145
of masculinity, we see that being
a man has meant slightly different

454
00:26:47,145 --> 00:26:48,864
things throughout different times.

455
00:26:49,655 --> 00:26:53,695
From the bravery of a World War II soldier
to the expectations of today's society,

456
00:26:54,105 --> 00:26:56,305
masculinity goes beyond stereotypes.

457
00:26:57,825 --> 00:27:02,475
It involves finding our personal goals,
standing up for what matters to us, taking

458
00:27:02,475 --> 00:27:05,045
care of our health, farming our purpose.

459
00:27:05,465 --> 00:27:09,405
It also means surrounding ourselves
with a supportive tribe and adapting

460
00:27:09,405 --> 00:27:13,555
to changes and learning to back
us back even when times get tough.

461
00:27:14,245 --> 00:27:17,305
So here's to embracing the many
sides of being a modern masculine

462
00:27:17,335 --> 00:27:21,545
man and exploring these ideas further
here on the Fallible Man podcast.

463
00:27:22,335 --> 00:27:24,285
Now be sure and check out this episode.

464
00:27:25,690 --> 00:27:28,830
If you're listening, I've got
it down in the show notes.

465
00:27:29,150 --> 00:27:32,700
Uh, the next episode that will be great
to continue to hear this discussion.

466
00:27:33,070 --> 00:27:35,800
If you're on YouTube, it's
right up here in the corner.

467
00:27:36,400 --> 00:27:39,599
Be sure to check on it for
more information on this topic.

468
00:27:39,670 --> 00:27:44,210
As we explore this a little further,
thanks for joining us on this episode

469
00:27:44,210 --> 00:27:47,470
and be better tomorrow because what you
do today, and we'll see on the next one.

470
00:27:49,030 --> 00:27:51,500
This has been the fellow woman podcast.

471
00:27:52,050 --> 00:27:56,789
You're home for everything, man,
husband, and father, be sure to

472
00:27:56,789 --> 00:27:58,450
subscribe so you don't miss a show.

473
00:27:59,405 --> 00:28:02,094
Head over to www.

474
00:28:02,094 --> 00:28:03,094
thefallibleman.

475
00:28:03,094 --> 00:28:10,883
com for more content and get
your own fallible man gear.