249. Unmasking Your Mind-Body Connection - JJ Flizanes

Hello, and welcome to The Meditation Conversation, the podcast to support your spiritual revolution. I'm your host, Kara Goodwin. And today I'm joining joined by jj. Flizanes. jj is an empowerment strategist and creator of the empowering Minds Network. She hosts several podcasts, including Spirit, Purpose, and Energy, and she helps her clients remove emotional blocks to help propel their growth. So welcome, jj. I'm so happy you're here.

Thank you, kara. I'm excited about our conversation today, so.

Let'S talk a little bit. I would love to hear your origin story in whatever way feels right to share today, but how did you find yourself in the line of work that you're in today?

So I think it's like a deep dive. You start with something, and then you keep going. And I'm a Y gal, so I want to know why. I want to understand how things work. I'm not mechanical on the outside. Like, I wasn't the kid that took apart anything to see how it worked. I'm more of the psychological why of why someone thinks that way. Why do I feel this way? Why do I react this way? And I knew that the right brain part of myself growing up was very expressive, very creative. I'm a pisces. I love to sing and dance. I've been in dance classes since I was three, and that was really fun for me. And I did well in school, but I wasn't on the honor roll all the time, and definitely math and science were not I did well, but I wasn't that brainiac kid that was super smart in math and science. So I just figured that I wasn't that smart, and I was very expressive, and I thought I was a good communicator. What that meant was I was a big victim, but we'll get to that later. I thought because I could explain why you hurt my feelings and that I could tell you what not to do to not hurt my feelings again somehow I was a good communicator as I was going through my life. It's awesome. I really was so always proud of myself about how I could tell you how you hurt my feelings. I would want to explain to you and how not to do that. Anyway, fast forward 2002. That whole world flipped upside down. So victim mentality is now definitely one of my pet peeves, and I didn't know it at the time. So on the road to all of the things emotional, musical theater, acting, dancing, singing, creative writing, all that kind of stuff, poems and poetry I went to school for musical theater, but I did realize there was a part of me that realized that there was something missing. And what was missing was my left brain. So I decided that when I left school and I went to New York City to act and to audition and stuff, that I knew that I needed to do something other than weight tables. I'm a great waitress, I'm a great bartender, I'm a great restaurant manager. But I needed something that stimulated me in a different way. And I'd gone to the gym in college, a friend of mine who I worked retail with dragged me into the gym, and she said, let's go get a job at the gym because we hated retail, and I hated spending all the money I was making on clothes they made me wear, which made no sense, right? So we went to the gym, and I immediately, as I was a front desk person, managing all the flow, going in and out of the club and memberships and whatever. And I remember seeing the trainers, and I went, whoa, what's that? And again, I was a dancer, so I had a very strong, muscular lower body, but I had no upper body. And I thought, well, I want to do that. How do I do that? And they gave me a test. And that's a whole another conversation that I tell on my Smart Exercise podcast on the video, and I've got a million podcasts, but it dates back to basically that most personal trainers don't have a lot of education and science, and as long as you take a test, you become certified by somebody. And literally, I could start a certification tomorrow that you then get a job. And so there's just not, like, a lot of science there. And I took a test. I didn't pass it the first time, took it right away, again, passed it the second time. Didn't study between the two, but got the message that as long as I protected myself legally, this was okay. You didn't actually really need to know a lot about one thing. You just need to know a little bit about a lot of things. And that led me down this questioning path of like, well, why? Again, I go into the gym and I see all this equipment and I'm supposed to know how to use it. I didn't learn that on my certification. It was a test. But that's what most personal trainers do, or they're athletic already, and some gym teacher who was their math teacher during the day, who took no science, taught them how to lift in the gym, and so they just pass on these dumb exercises. Sorry, guys, I'm going to be a little bit judgy because I need you to understand that it's not all good. Like, a lot of exercises out there can actually hurt you, and there's other ways to get there without ruining your joints. So fast forward. I became I was a trainer, and then one thing led to another, and I was introduced to science. Hello? And science of the body. And I became and I realized I was smart. I was like, oh, my God, my left brain, it works. Like, I get this. I understand this when I can see it mechanically. I can take physiology, which is a very brainy internal science and make it like, seeable, make it mechanical, make it so you understand how the parts and pieces work together because you see how they affect each other. So all of a sudden, my left brain was like, whoa, you're smart. You get this. And then I went into personal training. So it's like balancing out the left brain smart part of me. But then I was like, there too long, and I was like, oh, man, I'm itching to cry or scream or just be expressive. And so then I adapted a musical, and I did an off Broadway two person, two woman show because I need to stretch my arms of all right, well, I forgot that part of me. The right brain has been kind of quiet for a little while now. I was all excited about my left brain, and now I'm like, oh, let's bring this back together. So let's take that down into becoming a personal trainer, working with people and asking the why questions, asking the why does this person why are they disciplined? Why is this person not why they want to lose weight? Why do they want to look better? Why blah, blah, blah. And it just over time became especially the physical stuff. When you understand structure and function of the body and of the joints and mechanics and joint structure and function and biomechanics in terms of application of force to your muscles and joints and how that affects you, then you look at what other sciences come into play when someone has back pain, but they're fine. They're fine for their hormones. They're fine for their chemistry. There's nothing going on structurally that would cause this pain. What are we looking at? What other things can we bring into the fold to make sense of what's going on? And that's when I was introduced to Dr. John sarno's work and Healing Back Pain, which it's going to feel like it's psychosomatic, but it's not like you actually do have pain, but the body creates this pain to block the emotion that you don't want to feel. And that's the whole mind body connection. And the mind body prescription. It's been around for years, but Dr. John sarno put it in a couple books, and he was very he was a very dry man. Like, I mean, in terms of his delivery, you'd think someone talking about emotions and structure because he was a physician who would do back surgeries for, like, 40 years, and around, like the end of that, he was like, oh, these surgeries aren't necessary, none of them, because he would see people coming in with perfectly straight spines. Nothing wrong structurally, but they would be in immense amount of pain, like debilitating pain. And he'd see people that were crooked who looked like they should be in pain, that had no pain, and he started to make sense of he called it tms tension myocytis syndrome, and it's about the muscle basically causing inflammation to distract you from the rage that you're holding on to underneath. Most lower back pain is linked to repressed rage. And it goes in the shoulder and it's in the knee, it's in the neck anyway, so that started the emotional conversation. So now we started to blend the worlds blending the worlds of my emotional how we look at the world. Because as an actor an actress one of the best things I think I'm at the point now that I think everybody's taken acting class, because until you know what it's like to put on somebody else's circumstances and see through their eyes that aren't yours. There's true value in understanding that to have compassion for other people as well as yourself and to recognize that just because you interpreted something doesn't mean everybody else saw it the same way. And so I now start to go, oh, this is why I did it in this way. And I'm bringing them all together. And then there's the law of attraction and there's the quantum physics aspect of the next science that, to me is above all of them and how the body reacts underneath the umbrella of quantum physics and epigenetics. I was just pulled up. I have a book called Messages from the Body. And let me back up and say for a second that energy is emotion. I'm sorry. Emotion is energy and energy is emotion. And when we have what I like to sort of create a foundation for if I were to ask you, Carol, what happens to you when you get embarrassed? What physically happens to you?

I think I get flushed.

Your face gets red?

Yes. Or my face when you press.

And what happens when you are afraid or nervous?

My palms get sweaty.

Okay. And what happens when you feel scared? Like really scared.

I definitely carry a lot of that in my stomach. And I think there's just a whole contraction of trying to make yourself as small as you can type of thing.

So these are all physical manifestations of an emotion. And I think we all would agree that that happens. A lot of people get flush in the face or their heart beats, starts to go and they start to sweat or sweaty palms or maybe they have a little bit of a stiff neck. So we understand that that's what happens when we get nervous. What do you think happens when you walk around with anger for years and years and years? What do you think when you don't like yourself and you have self hatred or when you have hatred for somebody else or when you're terrified or feel unsafe? That energy has to go somewhere. And most of the time we don't express it. And even if we do express it, again using the therapeutic model we tell the same story over and over again. So it actually doesn't change how you feel about it. You just talk about it more. So that emotion has to go. Some of that energy has to go somewhere. And the body holds 88% of our subconscious mind. The body will tell you when there's something off, but most of us don't listen to our bodies. We numb it. We numb it with food or alcohol or drugs or painkillers or we think that there's something going on. So your body is always talking to you. It's whether you're listening or not. And how loud does it have to get before you're ready to listen? So one of the tools I have is a book called Messages From the Body. And it's available. No money can buy it's, like, a little bit. It might be like 100 or $150. It's very comprehensive. I think there's almost 800 pages. And again, I use this book to reflect if it's emotional. I believe that there is an emotion attached to every physical ailment, though. Does it mean that it's always physical? No, it just means that the emotional piece create a physical problem and not have to deal with the physical problem. But you always want to address why it was created in the first place. And if something keeps moving or keeps changing or you've had cancer four times, wake up. It isn't physical. If you've done everything, if you have pain in your neck, in your back, in your shoulder, in your knee, you've had surgery, you've gone. The chiropractor, you've been the physical therapist, you've been in the acupuncture, you've been to all the places, and you still have it, it is not physical. Are there things you can do to make things, to move energy? Of course. Are there things that you can do that will help you feel emotionally better also? Yes. But sometimes it's the indicator. The body is trying to tell you that there's something emotional going on that you're not willing to look at. And the body will protect you from experiencing deep pain like rage by holding onto the body. I mean, my partner and I, he got sick and he had the flu, and then it would put him on his back, and he had so much back pain, but it forced out of him what was going on, like a fear that he was holding on to. But everyone's to go to the hospital, they want to do all the drugs, they want to do all the things, just make the pain go away. And when the pain wasn't going away, I was like, So what's going on? And when he admitted the fear, it started to dissipate, really, and had an emotional release. But the problem with the book for people and I'll just have to state this because my ex husband's aunt, who is a nurse, when she had some neck pain, I read to her what it was. And basically, neck pain is some form of not wanting to see someone else's point of view. It's being stubborn. It's not wanting to see something. And I told her that, and she goes, yeah, that's what it is. And it was with her, like a superior. And then, I don't know, a week later, she still had neck pain. And I go, Jenny, I told you what it was. And she goes, Well, jj. It didn't make it go away. And I said, all right, let's back up a second. You're a nurse. The diagnosis of the problem is not the treatment of the problem. You have to do something different in order to get it to go away. So I'm telling you what the emotional problem is. It's not to go, oh, yeah, that's what it is, and then keep repeating it. It's to do something about it. But it's amazing how many people have looked in the book and be like, oh, yeah, that's what it is, and then they just continue doing it. And I'm like, well, the whole point of the diagnosis is to change and to give you some insight. So I work with that in the programs that I do with people. I do believe that there is a I think it's under, especially with cancer. I've been working with cancer patients for a couple of years now. I've been in realms with different doctors, lots of doctors, naturopathic doctors, naturopathic oncologists, and who all are on the same page of emotions, yet people still aren't doing it because it's the hardest thing. I literally have signed up to do the hardest thing. People will change their diet. People will take the pills. People will have the surgery, because it's a lot easier looking at yourself in your past and in how you interpret life and how you might be perpetuating your own pain by the beliefs you hold and the ways you look at the world. People don't want to do that because they don't want to feel the emotional pain. Now, people will do it after they're pushed against the wall and they've tried everything else. But I'm looking for people who understand this concept, and I don't have to sell it to them. I've had to sell it to some cancer patients, and I've just been really saddened by how much they actually don't get it. I'm like, you're not going to get better. I mean, I hope you do. Trust me. I want everybody to be the best they can be and heal themselves naturally, of course. But when you see a pattern of disbelief and lack of trust over time, and then you ask that person to all of a sudden surrender and be trusting, it's not going to happen overnight. It's going to take another real scary thing. That's why radical remission written by Kelly Turner. Dr. Kelly Turner profiles people that have doctors have sent them home to die, and 30 years later, they're still living because they stopped, they surrendered, and there's literally you can't have a radical remission without this emotional component. Nine dr. Kelly Turner studied all these patients and probably 1500 radical remission patients, and she boiled it down to nine, which ended up being ten. She wrote her second book. Ten factors that they all did that were the same, and out of those ten factors, six of them are mental, emotional, spiritual, more than half. But again, it's for the person who understands a little bit, who has maybe an older soul or who's ready to look at things in a different way, who resonates with this idea that you're the creator of your own reality and that everything in your life is here to serve you. And you have the opportunity, with every contrast, to dig a little deeper and expand into the next version of you. Or you can sort of numb it or sidepass it or try to avoid it for as long as you can until it gets so big your body says, no, I am going to lay you flat on your back because you are not listening. So that's kind of how I got to where I am. It started with the emotional conversation as entertainment and personal expression and personal freedom and allowing myself to be whoever I was in that moment and to play and explore and stretch into other people's and learn and be like. Oh, I learned more about the 1940s doing our town as a play in New York City in 1992 than I did in a history class. Because when you embody the circumstances, it now means something to you. It's not just memorizing dates and things like when you understand how they live and how they felt and what a day in the life of this character was, you can see how it feels in their body. And so this all got integrated as a personal trainer who just wanted to understand why people weren't committing to what they were doing. Why were they emotionally eating? Why weren't they why were they sabotaging? What was that about? Why, I kind of started talking about and claiming, and I was doing Law of Attraction since 2002, and a lot of my clients, of course, didn't really want to hear that. So I started my podcast to find people interested in that conversation and to try to save my marriage. And through that I did this deep dive into emotional work that I was already doing, but I needed a bigger reason to do more. And so I became a sponge of interviewing and talking and learning and reading and doing and just understanding and taking that passion I have for understanding and all the different tools and became an empowerment strategist. And I was still personal training at the time, but I moved out of that and kind of retired about four years ago and never looked back, because now I just help people uncover what stops them and what blocks them, and I could do it all day long. Every day. I have to stop my Zoom sessions with my clients who do these groups with me. Like, I have to be the one to come in because I'll keep going. I'll go late and late and late because I'm like I love it. I love uncovering what beliefs you hold that create the life that you have that you want to change and how we can we change them. I love identifying it. I love getting in there and seeing the patterns. I love showing it to you so you can shortcut therapy. I mean, I did a signature talk came out of this called Three Reasons Why Talk Therapy Is ineffective, which I know is going to piss off a lot of therapists, but I'm sorry. And I'm not saying I don't know everybody, but all I know is the people that come to me have been in therapy five years, seven years. We do two sessions, boom. They're like, oh, my God, now life is different. And I understand versus I'm not keeping the same story alive and repeating the same patterns and just listening to somebody validate me and make me the victim of all of my stories. So I'm about really making super change and getting there as fast as possible. Not because it's about the speed, but because there are tools that we have to identify patterns very quickly. You do not need to talk about what happened to you as a child for 20 years. 1 hour. Give me 1 hour. With an exercise, I can tell you your core wounds, how you react, how you feel and why you do what you do and how to change it in 1 hour.

That's powerful.

Yeah. That's why I do what I do.

That's amazing. Thank you for sharing all that. I've made some notes because there was so much in there that we could pull threads for the rest of the interview just from all of that. That's amazing. I love how self reflective you were from the beginning. And it's fascinating to me that you started in the right brain. For me, it was the opposite. I have always been very rational, very linear, very analytical. I come from an It background, and I really enjoyed math as a student. And so for me, it's been like, how do I tap into that right side, the right brain? The more feminine, the more creative. And that has been it was, like, totally undervalued and just I undervalued it and it was something that was late to develop and it's been something that I've had to sort of consciously nurture. And so I love that you have had this opposite experience and you're so grounded. Like, just talking to you, it's really clear that you're a very grounded person. So you seem to really hold those two kind of opposing in some sense, like in a dual nature, those opposing sort of aspects of ourselves. And it's like this really integrated, like, really strongly integrated presence with you. So that's really beautiful.

Thank you.

Yeah, most of the time.

The first comment is and I have to warn people that I've got four fire planets in the top seven astrological planets. So I have a lot of fire, and I have not had any coffee today. I've been off caffeine for days. I'm normally just supercharged with energy. I've got three sag planets, which is like the energizer bunny of astrology and yeah, so I apologize ahead of time. I'm sorry. Not sorry. I want to give a lot of content. The great thing about podcasts is you can go back and listen again. I talk fast. I will try to slow down. As you have all heard. If you listen to the show, you've heard that I've done a meditation already, so, you know, I have the ability to slow down. It's just when it's like a hypnotherapist I used to work with would think I couldn't turn off. They're like, oh, well, you need to turn off. I'm like, I can turn off. I'm like an Acupuncturous one said to me, he's like, you're like a porsche or a Ferrari. Like, when you're on, you're super fast, but when you're off, you got the COVID on and you're in the garage sleeping. I'm a super fast, high powered car, and I have two speeds really fast. I can do all the speeds, but I get excited, I get passionate, and so I talk fast. So hopefully you all can keep up, and if not, you can go back and listen again. Sorry.

Yeah, don't listen to this one on a higher speed. Listen to it on one speed. One. If you tend to go on 1.25, but I love it. You're bringing this amazing creative energy to this connection now, and it's really powerful and important. So thank you. I also wrote down pompeii because you were talking about being in the difference between understanding something and actually you use the actor's terms where it's like, oh, you're you're embodying a character and you're really understanding historically, like, what it was like to be in a different time in a different way than you would in history class, for example. And I've had a similar experience just through travel and living abroad and things like that, where I have been fascinated as I've gone different places, and I'm like, oh, my God, I learned about this in high school, which was decades ago now. And it's like, yeah, I know that there was, like, a civil war here, or whatever it is, but when you're reading about it and it's two dimensional and you're just reading these words and you know you have to memorize it. And it's about dates, it's about leaders, it's about what important things happen, but you're not I mean, maybe certain people are. There must be, or history would be dead because nobody would want to carry it forward. But for me as a student, it was always, like, just memorization, like, wrote memory and then to actually go and be in these places. And so Pompeii is one of those places where really I was just listening to the song Pompeii. I think bastille is I think that's who sings that song anyway? And somebody sings a song called Pompeii. And I was, like, listening to it. I've heard it hundreds of times, and I was listening to it with, like, fresh ears and thinking about when I have been in Pompeii and the experience of being on site and imagining out of nowhere the hilltops erupt. And there's lava coming at you, and there's smoke in the sky, and you know the sky is black and everybody doesn't know what to do. There's nowhere to go. And it's it's just different than learning about, like, in Ad 79, I'm making up these numbers, but it was around the first century, I believe, there was this big eruption and whatever, and you get your dates and you get like, okay, that was the Roman what's the word I'm looking for? Colony or whatever and whatever the details are. But to actually be there and then see the remnants, the ruins, there's actually a cast of a person who's in the fetal position that had been obviously just brought to their knees by the lava. And then it's a cast made out of hard lava where their body is gone, but you can see this almost mummified representation of them and it's like, gosh. So it's so powerful. It's just my point of really immersing yourself in one way or the other. Whether we're doing that through creativity or whether we're doing that through actually like being where somebody is, it really does help to expand us and open us to experience things in a much different way, for sure.

Well, it taps into the humanity of it, because why do we memorize any of these dates anyway? We memorize them because it changed the way we were. It changed who we were, how we identified ourselves, what the major feeling or frequency and tone of was of that era or of that generation. And it's funny that you mentioned Pompeii because I'll be going there in less than a month. So it's divine timing to remind me that don't skip it, because I didn't necessarily have a desire to go there. I've just been told, you want to go, you should go. And I'm kind of playing it by ear in terms of what every day where we spend different days in the different cities are going to be. But I will make sure to get to Pompeii now.

Yes, I would recommend taking I had a really good tour guide when we went and I just found it really fascinating. I like taking tours just because they can give you more insight than just when you're walking around. But that is really funny. Of all the places you're going to, you kind of teased us early on with the whole victim thing and there. Was a switch that happened with you where you were finally ready to let that go. Do you want to talk a little bit about that? Because we've kind of circled it.

Yeah, sure. 2002, I had moved from New York City to California to Los Angeles, started my business and doing a lot of driving to clients because I was doing personal training in home and my very first coach here in California. We talked about a little bit about Law of Attraction, but I don't remember how she fit that in there. But she sent me a cd and it was Abraham and it was 2002. And I listened to that cd. It probably had seven or eight tracks on it, probably 100 times. And when I first heard esther hicks channeling Abraham say, you're the creator of your own reality, I'm surprised I didn't crash my car because I was so, oh my God, yes. Now, I didn't understand how that worked necessarily. I just thought, well, that's good news. Yeah, I'm the creator of my own reality, so if I don't like something, I can change it. And I know that when I started saying that to people, you had two camps. You had the camp that understood it and resonated with it. Then the camp that said, no, I did not ask for this. I did not want this bad thing that happened to me and these awful parents that I had in this awful circumstance and they would feel shame. And I didn't understand that for a long time. So I say that and explain that to anyone who's listening. If you have that reaction, I know that that's not what we're saying. And depending on, again, the point of view of where you're looking from, if you believe that this is your only life, you're here one time, then you die and you don't go anywhere and your spirit doesn't really exist. And I know that's not true. I've seen who you've interviewed on your show. But for anyone who's made it here and who does actually think that and I'm not disputing that, I'm not going to tell you that you're wrong. Of course no one can tell you that you're wrong. You might be completely right. But that decision to believe that you only have one life and that this is it and that nothing happens when you die, that's fine. Just know that it makes everything in your life really, really big and important, and it kind of boils down too much, a little bit of a narrow point of view, because we don't have angels and guides, and we don't have multiple lives, and we don't have energy, and we don't have expansion, because the world is literally you've made it really small. If you don't know what you believe, putting on a new belief and trying out, well, maybe what if I have been reincarnated? What if I'm an older soul? What if this is my 6th time on the planet. What if I've gone through? What if I got to choose my circumstances? What would that mean for me? Because the difference is with believing that this is only one life that you have and you're done and nothing happens. It's not that you're choosing to be a victim, but by default, you become a victim because anything that happens to you seems like your circumstances control your experience. And when you go broader than that, you get to become the victor. You get to decide. And that's really what, for me, quantum physics and Law of Attraction became. I want to teach people to take more responsibility than you even think is possible. Take more responsibility because at the end of the day, it gives you something to do about it. It doesn't mean shaming blaming you're wrong you're perfectly. If you're listening to this podcast, you are in the right place at the right time. You are on your journey, exactly where you need to be. What happens next is what you decide to do with that. And sometimes lessons need to be repeated until they're learned. Sometimes you need to hear it or have something happen ten times before you're ready to look at it differently. And that was just your path. It wasn't because you're stupid. It's not because you don't learn. It's because of whatever reason, whatever belief system, whatever upbringing you had, whatever stubbornness you may have in your chart. If you're a tourist I'm just kidding. Or a capricorn, but not throwing anyone under the bus. I'm just saying there are certain signs that are a little more stubborn than others. But ultimately that's where when I heard you're the creator of your own reality and I know I'm an old soul and I know I've been reincarnated, I know I've been here many times. I also know my brother's never been here before. This is his first time on the planet. I knew that. I'm like, whoa. It couldn't be more different from there. You have something to do about it. When you become the creator of your own reality and you take that on, you can take responsibility for in an empowered way, not in a blaming way, not in something's wrong with me way, just to start to understand that. We call in when you I'm sure everyone's heard. I've saw on your list of shows manifestation. What is manifestation? People think you turn it on, like, I'm going to go manifest. No, you're manifesting all day, every day. You manifest where you are, not what you want. You can want a lot of things that aren't resonating with where you are right now. Especially anyone that wants more money. That's like, oh, I want to win the lotto. Cool, great. Can you receive that? Have you worked to expand yourself to the level to receive that and then hold on to that? Because, yes, you could win the lottery, but how many people who win the lottery, feel guilty and are in debt three years later. Why? Because they didn't grow into they didn't bring themselves into a place to hold that and to receive that energetically. So when we look at you being the creative own reality, to me it just gives the power back to you. It means that I get to change what I don't like. I get to take responsibility for what I'm attracting and understand that a little bit more so that I can change it versus feeling like a victim in a loop where I try and then doesn't work. Then I try and doesn't work and then I get frustrated thinking what's wrong? I don't know what's going on. This gives me a lane to unpack what's going on, to see, to dissect, to understand that subconsciously that 88% of you. That's what's running your show. You may decide to put something on a vision board and say I want that thing, I want that relationship or I want that money. And side note, probably the most important note, please write this down. This will be very important. I'm going to repeat it twice and I'm setting you up for it because I'm hoping it's going to blow you away. Not you care about everybody, right? Because just be really clear. When you're really clear of this, hopefully things will shift. The only reason that you want what you want is because you think you'll feel better when you have it. But the Law of Attraction says you can't even get it until you feel better. So we're just really looking for the feeling, not the thing. Because when you get the feeling, you don't even need the thing. And of course that's when you get the thing because you don't need it.

Yeah.

The trick is to live in a place where you are already having these feelings which you have the power to do right now. You don't need the money, the relationship, the health to get yourself into a better feeling place that you're searching for. And in fact, Law of Attraction, quantum physics says you have to get there, you have to be in that frequency to receive the thing that you want. So if you can just remember instead of saying, oh, I want this thing and if I get this thing then I'll feel better, then I'll feel safe, then I'll feel fill in the blank. No, it's not how it works. But being the creator of a reality gives you ultimate power. And I think you're probably sensing the groundedness of me doing all this work for so many years and really having it just integrate and sink in and be a part of and be the knowingness, the absolute knowingness that I have about what I believe and about what I do and what I see and what I understand. So much so because I sought it out. People say, why do you like my aunt? Once my cousin died and I gave her a bunch of information, some love, attraction. They said to me, how do you know all this? This was years ago. And I said, I've been searching. If I have a question, I search for the answer. And when it resonates, I get the answer and I go, okay, cool. And I don't need to search anymore. I don't need to add ten more modalities into my life. People wonder what I haven't done in your gram or human design. Those are great, but they don't resonate with me. I have astrology. I do a lot of deep dive astrology. So when I get those answers, I stick with my answers. I go, this resonates, this feels good. And when I realized that I was a victim in my childhood and I was a good communicator, I was like, oh, no, I wasn't good at all. I was blaming and I was telling everybody, because you can't control everybody. Like, that's a joke to think, oh, you hurt my feelings. Well, yeah, and that's a whole other conversation we're not going to get into right now, because people can't really hurt your feelings unless you agree with them. Nothing can hurt you unless it vibrates with you. If you do not resonate it, I am sure there are people that you don't respect that can say something not nice to you and it falls off water off a duck's back. But then there are people close to you that say one little thing that sounds like criticism, and all of a sudden our feelings are hurt. Why? Because deep down we secretly wonder if they're true. And we may believe it ourselves so we can't heal something, that we can't stop attracting mirrors from the outside world because it's there to help us change our relationship with us first and foremost. So I'll stop there.

I love that. Thank you so much. And I love also talking about that responsibility because it is like when we realize that we are creators, it's such an opportunity, and we then have this responsibility of like, okay, you had your time walking through your life asleep, just letting life pull you along. And you could do that and you could look at everybody else and point to all the reasons that you don't have what you want or you feel the way that you do. And then there's that manifestation kind of awakening of like, wow, wait, it's within me. I have the control, I have the power, but then you can't really stay asleep anymore. You know what I mean? It's like there is that responsibility then of like, okay, now that you have this power, now use this power and create really be intentional about how you want your life to play out.

And it's also about the unlearning. It's really about the deconstructing. I think that's where the therapeutic part of this comes in, where the empowerment strategists and all the deep dives I'm doing with people it's not because we have to grow ourselves into more. Right. And where we are right now is everything that's happened to you, all the beliefs that you have right now, and until we expand that you can't get more than what you have without being more than what you are.

Yeah, I love that. I love it.

People say, well, I want more. Cool. Did you grow into being more? Are you more? Have you expanded into more? Have you taken anything that stops you or sabotage you? Have you dealt with your core wounds? Do you love yourself? Do you show up for you? Do you take all these things that we're talking about? Because that's where people, oh, yeah, I put that thing on the wall. I really want that. But if you haven't grown, how do you think you're going to because, again, you manifest where you are. You don't manifest what you want. So you are in alignment. And if you keep getting things you don't want, it's a message. You may not see it, but it's a message about, this is the kind of thing you think you deserve or believe or accept can change. You just have to know. But you first have to see it. You have to understand it to know what to do to change it. So because too many people think, well, I'll just put on my manifesting hat, and I'll think positive thinking for two months. And it's not that simple. I mean, it can be. You can pivot. You just have to but it's like building, like muscle. This is again, let's pull my personal training back in. Literally, you have to change the neural plasticity of your brain. You have to make new neural pathways by doing different things, by thinking, by telling different stories, by honing in on something that is working versus what's not working. Right. It's like doing an appreciation or gratitude journal and really activating the emotions. If you're not practicing building and having more positive emotions and you're waiting for something to come into your experience to create those positive emotions, you're going to keep be waiting for a very long time, or it's going to be very fleeting. We have to again, that goes back to that being that creator and really understanding that you're just looking for the feeling in the first place. So just skip all the rest of it. Just go to the feeling and learn how to feel the feelings that you want to feel.

Yes. And that goes back to energy, emotion, being energy. Energy, emotion. Yeah. That's wonderful. Thank you. So how can people connect with you, jj? How can they find out more and learn from you if they're feeling called?

Well, my website is my name, so it's Jedifulzayans.com. There are a couple of free classes that are on there, like the one I mentioned, three Reasons Why Talk Therapy Is ineffective. I've got how emotions create healing and disease, and I've got another one. And then, of course, the podcast. The podcast is free. Spirit, Purpose, and Energy would be probably where I would tell all of you guys to go, coming from a meditation space and kind of integrating all these energetic principles into our human experience and expansion. So spirit, purpose and energy would be but I have others. Got a wine podcast for any wine lovers called Something to whine About, but you could go to Jedifulzanes.com. It's all there.

I love that. That's great. Wonderful. Well, thank you so much for being here, jj. This has been really enriching. I've really enjoyed it.

Thank you, kara. Thank you so much.

 

Kara Goodwin

I hope you enjoyed this episode. I'd love for you to do me one quick favor, which is to think of one person who would benefit from hearing this content. Let them know you're thinking of them by sharing this episode with them right now. Thank you, and I look forward to the next meditation conversation.