386. The Surprise Addiction She Couldn't See - Mary Beth Schrudder

​[00:00:00]

Kara Goodwin: Welcome to the Meditation Conversation, the podcast to support your spiritual revolution. I'm your host, Cara Goodwin, and this is a great discussion with Mary Beth Schroeder, where we talk about addiction, spirituality, and law of attraction. I love how she shares how her realization of her addiction surprised her, and I encourage you to be as honest and brave with yourself as she was.

We talk about how alcohol is It's so encouraged in our culture that many people don't question its role in their life and how it might be hindering their spiritual pursuits.

Mary Beth is the creator of addiction recovery with the law of attraction, a unique deck of cards used to help people recover from addictions and destructive habits. She's also an international bestselling author in multiple categories, including healthy relationships and leadership training. As a host of the spiritual [00:01:00] transformation podcast with Mary Beth, she does interviews with healers and the spiritually gifted along with solo episodes on spiritual upliftment.

For her audience. So before we get started, just a quick word about Camuso.

Take control of your stress with this necklace that's not only beautiful, but powerful. It works within seconds, has zero maintenance and helps you increase focus, lower your heart rate, sleep better and reduce anxiety. This is such a great product. You can check out episode two 40 where I talked to the founder .

Todd Steinberg. That episode is packed with useful insights about how to calm your body and mind. Use promo code, Kara Goodwin 15 to get 15 percent off and check out all of the partners of the meditation conversation podcast, which you can get to through the meditation conversation.

com.

And now enjoy this episode. Well, welcome Mary Beth. I'm so excited to have you here today.

Mary Beth: Thank you so much. I'm excited to

be here. [00:02:00]

Kara Goodwin: So I'd love to start by talking about your journey and how your struggles with addictions have led to this amazing version of yourself.

Mary Beth: So I would say that like a lot of people addiction with me started in childhood, actually with some childhood trauma. my parents were divorced when I was very young at age five, which left this abandonment wound. My, my father was absent and I started to get a lot of anxiety. Very young. Um, we were kind of left with neighbors who my mom didn't realize were neglecting us. yeah, so we went that, that actually led to food addiction too, because we didn't have anything to eat. And, and my mom was completely unaware. She's paying these people. She trusted them. So, you know, a lot of these things can start when you're really young and you don't realize it until later on in life, when you do the work and you look back at when did this all, what was the root cause? But I definitely developed a, Anxious attachment cell because of the abandonment [00:03:00] wounds because of the neglect, um, you know, Gabor Maté says, like, if you don't feel wanted, you're going to make sure you're needed. So then I became a people pleaser, you know, because I, you know, also being the middle child just kind of is like

that.

Kara Goodwin: I, that is profound. I've never heard that before. What Gabor,

Mary Beth: yes.

Kara Goodwin: say that again.

Mary Beth: So when you don't feel wanted, you're going to make sure

you're needed.

Kara Goodwin: Oh my gosh, that's brilliant.

Mary Beth: huge people pleaser thing going on. And I, it was brilliant for me the first time I heard it, all these. Bells and whistles went off like, oh

my gosh.

Kara Goodwin: Well, all the insecurity as well. I can't imagine already you feel so vulnerable as a child anyway, in the best of circumstances, because you're trying to figure everything out. You're dependent on your, you know, the adults who are there and, and with you in this situation, I just can't imagine. that level of, of insecurity, you know, day in, day out.

Mary Beth: and I [00:04:00] was already like super sensitive child. Like I had these psychic abilities that I didn't know that I had because you who knows, like you just can tell when other people are, or people, beings are in the room with you when it, that gives you a lot of anxiety. Like, I could always feel other people's feelings, but when you're a kid, you don't know what an empath is.

That's something I didn't learn till my thirties and it's like, oh. These energies and these feelings and emotions, they're not all mine. So then we later on learn how to block that out. And how to, which is very important for anyone who's listening and you're like, not comfortable in crowds or like, there's a lot of different things that. you can do to protect yourself from all of these extra energies that you're feeling. That might be why you're feeling intimidated when you're in a crowd because you're overwhelmed with energies. So, um, that took a lot of work to get over that, but I was so blessed to learn, okay, that's what it is because it does help. To get over [00:05:00] anxieties once you realize you're picking up all these energies. Um, so yeah, a lot of us that get into addiction, it's, it's just, we're seeking relief. We're self soothing. We're trying to escape some sort of suffering and trying to fill a void. And mine was all of the above. I had a huge amount of separation anxiety every time my mom left the house because she started working after the divorce, you know, when I was five. And then my dad leaves. So I'm like my little kid, mine goes, Oh my gosh. Well, if my dad leaves, my mom can leave too. So that I just thought like every time she left the house, I'm like having panic attacks, like thinking she's not going to come home or she's going to, you know, she's going to get in a wreck, a car wreck, or, you know, I just had all these things and I'm just sit there and wait for the garage door to open, you know, so I could stop panicking.

Kara Goodwin: Yes.

Mary Beth: it's, it sounds silly, but I

think this is

Kara Goodwin: You know, I actually, as you're saying this, I'm like, I remember that too. I had these fears as a child about a car accident [00:06:00] and my parents also got divorced when I was seven. But even before the divorce, I, I don't even know where it came from, but that they were both going to die in a car crash and then they got divorced and then I was really worried that my mom was going to get killed in a car crash and, um, but I haven't thought about that in so long.

I

Mary Beth: think about it until I started to do the work on myself. Right. Like, cause then you you're forced to bring all of the, you know, this, these subconscious things to your conscious mind so you could heal them. Right. That's doing the shadow work. And so like learning all that was. It's tough while you're in it, but it's such a relief, right? It's all of this, the shadow works, like bringing out all the rejected, all the dark stuff that we don't want to deal with, but that is the best thing that we could do to heal our lives. Right? So that's all we're doing is seeking relief. And I literally had my first drink at age 11. Which is embarrassing, but it's a fact and [00:07:00] it was because my friend and I went on vacation with a girlfriend of mine And her family was pretty lenient and like whatever they had all of this And by the way, I should mention I was raised in the 70s. So, um Life was different back then and my mom saw, you know She knew I was having all this anxiety and like OCD stuff that I don't I don't was OCD even a label back then I'm, not

Kara Goodwin: don't think so.

Mary Beth: think it was.

And I've definitely had like ADHD traits at one point in my life. I'm, I was diagnosed with anxiety and depression, you know, and all of these things. And just so you know, there is ways to get off of medication. Like I've actually not on any medication and we can learn how to manage our emotions.

It's just, don't let these labels take over your life. Don't let, don't let them become your identity. Okay. I didn't want to forget to say that, but anyway, um, yeah, my, my friend's family had all this alcohol sitting out on the counter and we were like, let's [00:08:00] try it. And so I remember clearly feeling like this. Is the answer. Oh my gosh. It was the first time in my life that I didn't feel anxious. And, you know, like I always had social anxiety too. Like, I don't know if I was just born. I don't remember not being anxious and having social anxiety and feeling awkward and all the things. um, but that just took away everything and all my inhibitions.

And I was like, this is wonderful. This is like magic. It felt like the answer to all of my problems. So that's the first time I experienced, which is a huge red flag. Right. Because you're like,

Oh,

Kara Goodwin: Yeah.

Mary Beth: alcohol is the answer to all her problems.

Kara Goodwin: Right. Yeah.

Mary Beth: what started. So I think a lot of us get into addictions because we're just trying to find relief from suffering.

That's it. You know, so don't beat yourself up if you find yourself in these vicious cycles. Um, so most of my life, I actually didn't think that I was addicted. I had people tell me. [00:09:00] That I drank too much for sure, but I thought they were being like, whatever it was, my mom, my husband at one point, my ex husband, um, just thought they were being controlling and like, I'm fun and you guys are lame and boring and controlling. But I think a lot of us might tell ourselves that because it's denial, right? We're in denial about how much we drink. And like, I never stopped to think for a long time. Like, why do I, Drink like every day I was having red wine. This wasn't like I'm drinking out of a brown paper bag, you know, liquor or something like that under a bridge.

It wasn't like that. I was highly functional. I'm in the corporate world at the time. And. Definitely just self soothing every day after work. It's my reward. I deserve this. Like, and I compared myself to people. Sure. But guess what everybody else was doing. We're all like, it's so normal. It's so glamorized and you're the weirdo if you don't drink, which is, I've been alcohol free for five years [00:10:00] now.

And guess what? I'm the oddball

Kara Goodwin: Oh, yeah. Me too. I was six years myself. Yeah. Yeah. Thank you.

Mary Beth: it, wasn't even like it's, it's, you've heard this probably like it's the only drug that you have to justify not doing. It's

Kara Goodwin: Oh, I haven't heard that, but yes, I know I'm, I, uh, I, I do feel like the oddball for sure. And, um, but I mean, I'm, I'm used to it. My friends appreciate that. I'll, I'll drive, but.

Mary Beth: Well, I was even a life coach before I realized that I really, how, how badly alcohol was affecting me. I was a life coach for a couple of years and I'm like, I'm going to add on a niche. Of like, not alcohol, but addiction recovery. Like I'm going to help other people who have addictions, not me. Right. Cause I, I didn't yet have that self awareness I start learning about it.

I start reading about alcohol specifically. There was a book called, um, alcohol explained by William Porter and don't read it unless you're [00:11:00] thinking about quitting because you cannot unknow this stuff. Like I really, I knew, okay, I'm I'm not a dummy, I know alcohol is not great for our livers, right, but I didn't know all the things that it was doing, especially affecting my sleep, um, that, you're not really getting good quality sleep if you're drinking alcohol, because your body creates stimulants that counteract the depressant, which is the natural thing for your body to do, but after your fourth, About four hours after your last drink, um, that depressant wears off and all you're left with is those stimulants.

So your body's just like, so a lot of people, if you're waking up at two, three in the, in the morning, I don't care if you've even only had one drink. It still does that, you know, it still has that effect. Um, and it gets worse progressively over time. It didn't start doing this to me till my forties. I'm 50 now.

And in my forties when, you know, like it really starts affecting your, uh, Endocrine system, which is your, your hormones. Like you can't, you cannot get away with the same stuff that we used to get [00:12:00] away with. Right. And so learning that just realizing I need to be more present for my son. Like it does really take you out of the present moment.

And it's just like asking ourselves, why do I need this? Why do I need to do this every day? And it's, I knew too much about law of attraction. I teach law of attraction. So when I really started learning about addiction and the definition of addiction, I was like, I have a really unhealthy relationship with alcohol.

I had to admit it. I don't ever say I'm an alcoholic because that goes against my spiritual belief systems because anytime we say I am something

Kara Goodwin: Oh.

Mary Beth: creator mode.

Kara Goodwin: Oh yeah, that's a good point.

Mary Beth: new identity, right? I'm no longer the person who drinks alcohol every day. Um, and even though it was just red wine, it's still like, it still affects you as it lowers your, it's a lower vibrational. Substance, it does lower your frequency. And so I knew all this about law of attraction and like, I need to set myself up for success each day, not lower my [00:13:00] vibration. So,

Kara Goodwin: that. That's amazing. That's very similar in terms of, you know, I shared that I, I stopped drinking and that was kind of that the vibrational piece, it was, um, you know, I was starting to get interested in, in energetic healing and using my energy to, to help others heal. And when I started, um, Learning about alcohol and how that works at a vibrational level, it was like, wow, that's really working against me

Mary Beth: yes,

Kara Goodwin: order to be able to lift into a higher vibration.

And in order to really have that extra life force, that extra prana, um, You know, alcohol's just chipping away at that. And if I want to have the, the surplus to be able to help others, um, I, I need to have my reserves. So, um,

Mary Beth: there are other spiritual consequences of alcohol, which like psychic mediums are easy, easily able to see. Like if they go to a bar, they're [00:14:00] able to see like the different. And, or, energy beings like

hovering

Kara Goodwin: Ooh,

that's fascinating. Wow.

Mary Beth: like this happened to me one time, like when people black out, I blacked out, um, it's, you look like you're talking and walking and you're still there, but you're not like, you can't, it's, it's. So what, what these psychic mediums say is they're taking over like they're not possessing you, but it's more of influencing you like taking your body for a joyride and they wait until the proper moment. So a lot of people, when they're blacked out, if you ever look in anybody's eyes, when they're really drunk and in an argument with you and they just don't look like they're there. I don't think they are like, not the more that I learned. It really does. It breaks down your aura and allows these energies, these negative entities in that we don't want to be able to influence us.

Kara Goodwin: That is, that makes so much sense. Yeah. I actually, I remember reading about Paramahansa Yogananda. Do you know the autobiography of a Yogi?

Mary Beth: [00:15:00] Yes.

Kara Goodwin: I, I can't remember where I heard this or, um, If it was written somewhere, but that he would go to this, um, rough part of town in LA. I hope I'm getting my details right, but in America somewhere.

And it was kind of a rough area. And he would just like sometimes, um, pace up and down in front of this bar. And He was just clear like just spending his time clearing the energy from that from outside of that

Mary Beth: Wow.

Kara Goodwin: and I think it goes very much to what you're talking about that there are you know, because Vibration it all like law of attraction it all has to match it's like you're going to receive what you're in resonance with and so if you're Using for for whatever you're doing that might be lowering your vibration Vibration Raising your vibration, but whatever it is, you're attracting into your life.

So if it's a lower vibration, you're, you're [00:16:00] attracting in those who, who would not be, who would want to come in and maybe go for a ride and not do the, the highest, most beneficial things for you.

Mary Beth: Right. Right. And

Kara Goodwin: Yeah.

Mary Beth: it's like, that's Law of Attraction 101. Everything's energy, right? But something that really helped me connect the dots, there was something about Law of Attraction that I didn't understand for the longest time, even, even after I was teaching it. do you know who Greg Brayden is? Okay, so, uh, are you familiar with the

seven mirrors?

Kara Goodwin: No,

Mary Beth: It's kind of an expansion on Law of Attraction and it's on YouTube for anyone can watch it for free. It's old. He's, he's sporting a, um, a mullet in

Kara Goodwin: are back.

Mary Beth: Yeah.

yeah, but this is,

he said, this is definitely

Kara Goodwin: was original OG mullet.

Mary Beth: this is, this is Greg Brayden at his finest in his mullet. And, um, it's really funny. He, but he, he does this, um, whole. It's a long, it's like over two hour talk on the seven mirrors, um, of the scenes, right? It's ancient esoteric [00:17:00] wisdom where, um, I've just, I'll only bring up the first mirror for time purposes. Cause anyone could go watch this, but the first mirror is cause everyone thinks we, we only attract what we are and that's not true.

We attract anything that we have an energetic spark with. So the first mirror is judgment, judgment. So just because like, And here's an example. So I, as one of my other addictions was toxic relationships, trauma bonds, codependency, which all stemmed from childhood. Right. And, um, was, Out of them at this time, but I kept attracting narcissists, liars, cheaters.

And I'm like, if the law of attract, I started questioning the law of attraction. I'm like, if this is true, why am I attracting this? Because I know that I'm not a liar and cheater, and I know I'm not a narcissist. Am I a narcissist? And I had to start questioning, like, cause why am I attracting this? Right. And. then when I heard that, I was like, Oh, my, I mean, this was years ago, but it switched everything for me because it's like, okay, [00:18:00] we don't only attract what we are. We attract what we judge. And I was judging the crap out of people who, who were liars and cheaters and narcissists. I was focused on it.

There's an energetic spark there. Right? So I was like, so relieved to learn that. But then the work came where, what do we do? Then we have to. detox from the judgment, right? Um, we have to learn how to have compassion for these people, which we're really kind of angry with and we're right to be angry, right?

You know, but eventually you got to get out of that victim role, take accountability because I was involved in those trauma bonds as well. Like I was, willingly in them, you know, no one was forcing me to be in them, you know, so we got to take accountability. Like, why do, why do, why am I doing this? A lot of it was my people pleasing. So I had to stop that because when you're a people pleaser, Like we said earlier, like these people who are manipulators, they can spot you from miles away on an energetic level too. And a lot of this is subconscious and sometimes those [00:19:00] people that you feel a deep chemistry, like this hot passionate chemistry with in the beginning, it's just kind of a red flag because it's familiar to you.

It's that same old familiar pattern. And that's part of the work is. Interrupting these patterns and making new decisions. And, and so it's very interesting when you learn, oh my gosh. So I, now, these days, when I have that instant chemistry with some, I really question it because of it's, it's very subconscious and it's, it's energetic and all the things. And I can tell you that I learned to have compassion for these people because. They were once a baby clean slate and stuff happened to them and their life that, um, caused them to be, you know, these, um, they needed to feel like, well, I have to manipulate and lie and cheat and steal or whatever to get love. So you think of it that way. and then I could also look at every, every relationship that was like that. And I could see in their childhood and their past and their, and their like [00:20:00] situation in life, like how they became that way. There's always a reason. There was always a reason.

Kara Goodwin: Yeah. Wow. That's so beautiful and maybe you can send that great Brayden video and I can put it in the link because I bet people will want to see that.

Mary Beth: definitely.

Kara Goodwin: I love that you bring that up about judgment because I think that is one of those sneaky places because we've, we want to use our discernment to become the highest version of ourselves, which means we do the work like you keep saying of identifying what is it within us that still needs to be cleaned up.

And then as we do it, we, we become aware of things that we weren't aware of, and then we can see it in other people. And then. It's kind of like this natural, it feels like a natural step is judgment. Like, okay, that's what I don't want. And I see that exhibited in other people. And I just came across something recently that was talking about like taking this back from a spiritual perspective of, um, this was a near death experience.

It was actually, [00:21:00] um, Vinnie Tolman who wrote, I'm having him on the podcast in a couple of days and. It's uh, gosh, his it's escaped me, but it's a great book. I'll put that in the show notes too. But, um, but he talks about his near death experience and he sees these people, uh, these beings in his experience that were kind of like waiting.

Let's just say they were kind of waiting outside of heaven's door. To put it, you know, very basic, I can't remember how he said it, but it's kind of like, okay, you can enter at your leisure and they wouldn't go in and they wouldn't go in because they disagreed with who was in there. And I was like, whoa, that is profound.

They were so judgmental about who should be allowed into heaven. That they wouldn't let themselves go in there because they were, couldn't let go of that judgment.

Mary Beth: And isn't that interesting? Cause we are always punishing ourselves when we [00:22:00]judge people and you know, we could still make observations, you know, it's, but it is, it's like, I, so I talk about this with people all the time, even my friends, I'm like, gosh, how do we know the difference between when our observations turned to judgment?

And I think it's the feeling that we have behind

1. You know, that's

Kara Goodwin: Yeah.

Mary Beth: Cause we still are human. We're still going to be able to observe things. things, right? But our subconscious minds do not know the difference between judgment when we're judging somebody else or ourselves. So we are quite literally judging ourselves when we judge other people.

So I always try to keep that in mind too. Um, our, our subconscious minds don't know the difference between fact and fantasy. So that's why it's another thing of catching yourself when, when your, your thoughts, your feelings, mainly your feelings, like a lot of think it's just about positive thinking, but we have to have that mind. And heart alignment, right? We're electromagnetic beings. Our, our minds are electric. Our hearts are magnetic. And, and when, when they don't match, we're out of alignment, we're, we're [00:23:00] going to have a wobble in our vibration. Like Abraham Hicks would call it a wobble, but when they're lined up, man, that's when we're really manifesting when we have that heart and mind lined up.

So like you could sit there and say a bunch of positive affirmations, but it doesn't really mean that much. If you're not feeling it, that's a feeling universe. I have this line that I always say. I believe I made it up. Um, I've never seen anyone else say it, but can't bullshit the universe. You can't because it's such a feeling universe that you can't just say things and have it come true.

You can't just sit on a meditation cushion and have good things flow to you. It also requires taking action. There's no law of attraction without taking action. So, you know, we just have to do these things. Um, And we have to just start paying attention to what we're thinking feeling. Cause most of us are living on autopilot or we're, we're, you know, we're not realizing that it's the same thoughts, the same actions, the same behaviors as the day before.

And then we wonder why our life doesn't change.

Kara Goodwin: Right. Yes. [00:24:00] Yeah. Beautiful. So I know that spirituality has been a cornerstone, has been a cornerstone of your transformation. Can you, and you've had some, um, unusual experiences. Can you tell us about this aspect of. of your transformation.

Mary Beth: Yeah. I think it actually started back when I was, uh, well, as a kid, I've always been like, never, I never doubted any of it just because of my personal experiences with paranormal stuff. As a kid, I've lived in a haunted house to, um, as an adult as well. And it just kind of follows me. I've skydived, I've had a paranormal life. And, but when I was 18, I had a profound spiritually transformative experience, which is, I just only heard that term a little over a year ago. And so think about when I was 18, Like I said, I'm 50 now. So this was like 1993, maybe 92 93 around there. I, I actually, there was no internet. There's nothing like that. I was completely [00:25:00] sober. I'm reading a book on near death experiences. Cause I was always a spiritual seeker, just like I was just born that way. And so I was always reading about spiritual stuff, but this book on near death experiences, I want to say it was called saved by the light. That's the one I think it was, but I read so many of them, but this one in particular, Um, as I'm reading it, it triggered this experience and I call it a quantum experience now, like back then I wouldn't have called it that.

I wouldn't have even known that term, but,

Kara Goodwin: Yeah.

Mary Beth: um, quantum experience because, and I'm sure you know, 5D, right? We all talk about 5th dimension. Uh, so. Back then

that wasn't a thing,

Kara Goodwin: Right.

Mary Beth: look back and say, I was living in 5d for two weeks or, or as Abraham Hicks would say in the vortex for two weeks, I was seeing the whole world through the eyes of source. and it was crazy. Like I didn't know what was happening though. So I go to the library, bookstores, I'm trying, I'm like, what is going on? But I was, it was beautiful, just pure bliss. It was kind of [00:26:00] like having a near death experience, except being in my body. And I was getting all these downloads. It's like, I would

just think a question and get the

Kara Goodwin: word that we wouldn't say back then. Yeah.

Mary Beth: Yeah, yeah, yeah. I just like, it was like, what's going on. And nobody knew what I was talking about. I would try to talk to friends and they just thought I was crazy. Like honestly batshit crazy. I would, I even remember having the sense of urgency that near death experience people have to go do good things, go out and do things like, you know, I, I, I tried to volunteer at a hospital.

I think they thought I was crazy. They didn't even. Yeah. Yeah. They didn't even want me to volunteer there. I'm not kidding you. Like, they're like, well, cause I was just on this next level. Like everybody was like, what is wrong with you? I remember just being able to see how everything was connected. A lot of stuff.

Are you familiar with the Course in Miracles? Okay. So all the things like that was like what I was able to see, like, we're, we're, we're not, everything's fears and illusion. Everything's love, unconditional love, all these blissed out feelings of joy. I was just living it for two weeks, two solid [00:27:00] weeks. And then at the end, I started to slowly come down, slowly come down. And I think it all happened so that I could do the work I'm doing today. But before I say that, as I got back down into this 3d dense time space reality sucks so bad in comparison because I was just living in 5d in this beautiful, know Realm, I don't know what to call it still to this day, I was just so depressed.

I didn't have guidance I didn't know how to integrate it. I was 18 old. So I got depressed and you know that saying Before enlightenment, chop wood, carry water. After enlightenment, chop wood, carry water. It's like that, except worse. Cause then I'm like, well, I don't feel connected. I went from being so connected to everything and everyone to feeling zero connection.

Cause nobody understood me. I didn't have the internet. Now today, if it happened, It would have been badass because I would just get on there and I would have a tribe immediately.

Kara Goodwin: Yes.

Mary Beth: too, [00:28:00] because guess what? This is a common experience. Um, it's happened to a lot of people, but a lot of people don't want to talk about it because they're afraid of being seen as crazy. And same with the near death experiences. People have that same hesitation, right? But, um, yeah, so. I decided the best thing I could do in my 18 year old mind was start drinking. That's when I started really drinking cause I felt most connected. That's the only way I could feel any sort of connection, you know, cause of the, after that contrast. And I think all of my addiction, like looking back in retrospect, happened so that I could be in the position I am now at all. And I also had the energy that, that. Spiritually transformative experience so that I had to be in a place where I embodied it instead of just reading about it in a book. So I could teach it. You know what I mean? So I could actually believe what I'm saying and know it. It's it's, you know, there's, there's beliefs and then there's knowing,

Right.

Kara Goodwin: Right.

Mary Beth: you embody this for two weeks, you know it, and then you don't question it anymore. And so everyone that I follow in life, like, like I was, I got really into Wayne [00:29:00] Dyer, Louise.

Hey, like all this was back in the day, like, um, neither one of them are alive anymore, but those are my first two mentors. And just, they all, they all knew this, like, like, so that's how I know who to follow is cause it's the same message. A course in miracles, same message. Um, all of these beautiful Joe Dispenza and Greg Brayden, same thing. They'll, they're going to all say this stuff because somehow they've tapped into this universal knowledge as well. I don't know if it was personal firsthand, but, but for me, I think that's why all of it happened. I think that's why I had to go through the addiction. knew I'm an intelligent person. Addiction has nothing to do with intelligence. It's nothing to do with it. It was, it was insane when I was trying to quit. But I was like, wow, I really always thought I could just quit. But that was, I needed to go through all that. I had to have that hard time. And, and realize this is nothing to do with intelligence.

This is, this is a interesting, Addiction is this interesting thing

that,

that, that really it's, it's for [00:30:00] me, it took a spiritual shift, AA. It took all the spiritual work that I do and that I teach in order. It would take nothing less than that for me to get out of addiction. And that's why, that's why it's like, once you know this, you got to help bring other people out of it.

You know what I mean? Once you, once you know how to get yourself out of the darkness, it's almost mandatory for me. Like I have to do this. And that's why it's my career now.

Kara Goodwin: Well, yeah. And thank you for taking us through all that. It's an You know, going back to how you started where you were like, I mean, I didn't really even think I had a problem until I started wanting to help people who had this problem and then you, you courageously recognized it within yourself. And there's so much social conditioning.

That's part of our, you know, part of drinking in particular. It's such a, you know, it's, it's a, um, It's more than acceptable within our society [00:31:00] to, to drink. We, we see the commercials all the time and it's how we celebrate. It's how It's you know. Yeah, it's, it's, it's how we bond. Let's get together and have some wine and, right.

And um, so to even like be able to separate our own actions from what society is telling us is not only okay, but encouraged. And to say, Wait a second, like, let me step back and actually consider what I'm giving up by partaking in that.

Mary Beth: the trade off? Yeah, you got to ask yourself that because look, I was a fun, I was fun drunk. I

Kara Goodwin: Yeah.

Mary Beth: you

Kara Goodwin: too. I was a very happy drunk.

Mary Beth: too.

Kara Goodwin: Yeah.

Mary Beth: like, I wasn't, Creating problems and getting in arguments. It wasn't like that, but you got to ask yourself. It's a very personal decision.

Like, is it worth that trade off? Sure. I'd had fun for like three hours, but then my whole next day I'm like half mass, you know, and not, [00:32:00] not being the best coach I could be not being the best. And I'm like very much about living in integrity, you know, like I, how can I be a coach and be helping other people live their best lives when I'm not even willing to live my best life? Right. And, and everything changes for anyone who's sober curious. I mean, and I'm sure you can say it each year gets better and better and better. You start to attract, you really do start to

attract better. And

Kara Goodwin: Absolutely.

Mary Beth: purpose. Like my business exploded, you know, with clients and really good clients who I can actually help.

You know, I was getting kind of some wishy washy clients before, and I think it's because I was a wishy washy. Yeah,

Kara Goodwin: Yeah.

Mary Beth: in

integrity.

Kara Goodwin: Right. Wow. Well, this has just been amazing. So phenomenal, Mary Beth, thank you so much for sharing so much today and just for the work that you're doing out in the world. Can you tell everybody how they can connect with you and learn more?

Mary Beth: Sure. Um, [00:33:00] so my, my business is day one life coaching, D A Y O N E life coaching. Um, I also, I have so day one life coaching. com is my website. So that's one way if, if you're thinking, Hmm, coaching might be something for me, maybe I want some one on one if I do offer a free discovery call. So you can just, if Tell me a little bit about your background.

I could tell you a little about how I work. We decide together. Are we a match? If not, hopefully I can give you guidance to something else. That's a better match for you. So day one life coaching. com and then. If you want, and oh, I'm on every platform, Instagram, tick talk, um, Facebook to Facebook pages, um, my personal and my, uh, business page too.

But can follow me on there. I do give a lot of tips and things about law of attraction and just a general like spiritual upliftment, spiritual healing, spiritual recovery, things like that. And for your listeners, I could offer the, um, Uh, 10 off on my addiction recovery with the [00:34:00] law of attraction cards.

Kara Goodwin: Ooh.

Mary Beth: code. She'll

use meditation,

Kara Goodwin: Yeah.

Mary Beth: code meditation for your listeners. And we'll, they'll get 10 off of those cards. And I hate this. I hate that I don't have any, um, good rates for international. So us only, I mean, it's out there, it's like 50 to ship. It's like, it's way more than the card.

So you, you don't want to, it's just, don't do it. Just, I

can't let you do that.

Kara Goodwin: Yeah.

Mary Beth: There, there's just no way to, to ship, um, these, these cards. Uh, international in a expensive way.

Kara Goodwin: Oh, well thank you for, yeah.

Thank you for offering that code. That's awesome. Everybody loves a good deck. That's awesome. Good. Well, thank you again. I've loved this discussion and thank you for everything that you're doing to help people.

Mary Beth: Thank you so much for

having me.

Kara Goodwin: Absolutely. Thank you. Thank you for listening to this episode of meditation conversation. I'd be so grateful if you would share this episode with someone in your life who would appreciate it. Your sharing helps build momentum and [00:35:00] make high vibrational content such as this more accessible and easier to find.

And I'd also be so grateful for you to subscribe to this content. Thank you for your support. And I look forward to the next meditation conversation

​