Ep 57 - A cautionary tale of how a jealous ex partner can snap. Stop listening if you are feeling triggered. by this episode

EPISODE NOTES FOR THE JAMES BRUNSON INTERVIEW

A CAUTIONARY TALE OF HOW A JEALOUS EX-PARTNER CAN SNAP.

Today's guest, James Brunson shares his story of going through a life-threatening ordeal when he was in a new relationship with a survivor of a past abusive relationship and how things escalated as soon as her jealous ex-partner became aware of their relationship.

This conversation is such a clear example of how easily jealousy can cause a person to snap and become dangerous.

This is a stark reminder of how important it is to stay on your guard when you have a partner or an ex-partner who is prone to be jealous.

If you are a victim or a survivor of an abusive relationship please make your safety your top priority.

Creating safe boundaries with the right support can be a saving grace if your situation escalates.

Please make sure that you reach out to the appropriate supports to help you stay safe.

Everything else is figure-out-able.

If you have broken free from the cycle of abuse and you are looking for some help to rebuild your life and get to the light at the end of the tunnel, you are very welcome to book in a discovery call to have a chat with me to explore how I can help you. 

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Here are the top tips of today’s episode: 

• • When a victim breaks free from a cycle of abuse they do not know if they have broken free to a point where they can go about living their life without worrying about further incidents.
  • The time that a victim breaks free from an abusive relationship and for the foreseeable future can be the most dangerous time and it is important to understand just how important it is to be linked to the right sort of support services at this time in the event that things escalate.
  • The support services that a victim should be aware of and an easy to access contact list for are emergency services number, whatever that is in your country, a number for a domestic abuse refuge service, in case you need to go into hiding, a number for any free domestic abuse counseling service in your country. These are your top priorities to help you stay safe and get connected to the right support services to assist you.
  • Many abusive partners are also jealous and that is why they will often have an attitude of if they can't have you, no one else can have you too. This is what makes new relationships some of the most dangerous times for victims of abuse. 
  • You never know how you are going to react in a crisis like a jealous partner turning up and becoming abusive to both yourself and your new partner if you are in a new relationship. This is why it is so important to have a safety plan in place so that you have something to fall back on if you freeze.
  • Even if you are not in a new relationship and your ex-partner who is abusive thinks that you are seeing someone, this can be equally as dangerous as if you are in a new relationship.
  • Jealousy can drive people to do crazy things.
  • This cautionary tale emphasizes why it is so important never to let an abusive ex-partner back into your personal space and why it is so important to create safe non-negotiable boundaries like a personal protection court order. You have a right to feel safe and be safe in your own home. 
  • There is a gap in time between when an incident happens and the time the authorities catch up with perpetrators. This is the time to be on high alert, especially if you are back home which is a familiar place to the perpetrator.
  • And then there is also a time of uncertainty after a perpetrator has served time where a victim is in a state of fear not knowing whether the perpetrator may come after them again. 
  • When you break free from a cycle of abuse and you really invest yourself in your recovery, you can recover a wiser version of the person you lost in the relationship.
  • James illustrated how adversity can help you go to the next level in your life. The adversity will bring into focus what is really important in life and help you get more focused on what's important and allow you to let the unimportant stuff go. 
  • On the other side of adversity lies the opportunity to live a life that is aligned with the things that are most important to you.

   

  I hope this interview inspires you to rise and shine.

   

  Subscribe. Enjoy. Share. Sending love and light, Sandy J

   

  CAUTION: If you feel unsafe at any time please STOP LISTENING. You can come back anytime you are in a safe place to listen to the rest of the Podcast. YOUR SAFETY is the most important thing to consider.

   

  If you are in immediate DANGER call the Police.

   

  NOTE OF ENCOURAGEMENT: If you are struggling with your mental health please reach out for support with some form of counseling, therapy, or coaching.  If you don’t know where to start to find a counselor, a good place to start is to talk to your Doctor. There are also many online counseling supports now available. If the Support Person is not a good fit for you, try another and another, until you have one that is the right fit for you. And don't forget, I help women to heal and grow, and help them to meet their challenges head-on, to move towards a life they love. 

   

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  Until next time, stay well and stay safe.

   

  Sending you love, light, peace and joy,

   

  Sandy J